I woke up looking at the same walls I'd never thought I'd see again. I smell the same smell of beer and the same tv show that plays at the same time of day once again. it felt like going to bed to a dream and waking back up to a nightmare once again. I laid in my bed facing the wall afraid of what I would walk into if I were to go into the living room. what would he say, what would he do?

the sound of the tv came to an end as my father turned it off and heavy footsteps were heard in the hallway coming closer and closer to my room. I slowed my breathing down and tried my best to slow my heart, awaiting my father's arrival to my room. I closed my eyes welcoming darkness because anything was better than him. he sat down on the edge of my bed and I felt his eyes trained on me. to my surprise I wasn't grabbed up or smacked awoken like other days, he rested his hand against my hair and rubbed it in a soothing manner.

the gesture alone made me want to do nothing more than to cry in the arms of the father I knew before, but it wasn't him anymore. I learned the lesson beatings ago. he was like a switch. he was unpredictable. I knew better than to trust that my father had changed for the greater good.

he was sick. and he'd always be.

he shook me awoke and I had no choice but to open my eyes and face the harsh reality that was in front of me. I turned to meet his eyes. It felt like God was playing a cruel joke on me. The man that was in front of me was the man I haven't seen in years. Eyes were soft, the face was relaxed. Even the devil himself couldn't play a role this good.

"Why are you so nice all of a sudden"

And his soothing and came to a halt, and those soft eyes became hard again from my words yet his face remain relaxed. "You know you got some damn nerves pulling the shit you pulled," he said chuckling. He removed his hand from me and faced the door entrance. " you went and got that boy into all this trouble kin, when all you had to do is come home as I asked, made me put on a front for all those people too" he turned to laugh again. " did you see it kin, the tears were a nice touch wasn't it" I stared at my dad in disbelief. He continued on with laughing.

"And, and they all believed me kin" at this point he was laughing til tears spilled from his eyes like a leaky faucet. The like a switch the laughing stopped and he grabbed a hand full of my hair in a tight grip. " you just love to make a fool outta me don't you, just like your damn mother". "Leave my mother out of this" I spit out. "oh, but you see kin I can't" he rises from the bed with the death grip of my hair still on his hand.

He walked to the living room dragging me behind him like a rag doll. I tried to scream but it came to a halt when his hand connected to my face. "Shut the fuck up kin, you did this to yourself" I cradled my face while I continued to be dragged to the living room, muffling my cries. I was met with the same furniture that my blood splatter over. "You see the fucking bag Kinsley" my head was jerked to the coffee table in the middle of the room and saw my bag scattered along with my clothes.

"You see kin in that envelope you took from my room had fucking letters along with a tape" his eyes trained on me and he smiled once more eyes back soft. I thought back to when I opened the envelope, not once did I notice tape with the letters. "I, I don't remember a tape papa". He laughed once again and looked towards the door "she says she doesn't remember a tape" he says to himself. He looks back at me and the smile he had on his face turns into a look of worry and anger.

I felt my body being launched into the wall a couple of inches away from us. "what the fuck do you mean you don't remember about the tape kin you fucking took the envelope" he said stomping towards me. I grabbed my legs and held them to my chest. "I don't know papa I don't know where it is ".

The section of this chapter you are about to read involves abuse if you want to read ahead scroll until you reach bold font.

I felt a kick on the side of my ribs and felt all the air leave my body. I heard a crack and then I heard a scream and realized it had come from me. My father continued to kick every fiber in my body as he shouted, "where the fuck is the tape, where is it". Me trying to protect my body against the blows came to an end as I grew weak by every kick. My eyelids grew heavy and I tasted the metallic taste of my own blood filled my mouth.

"No no no you don't get to sleep"! he grabbed my hair and pulled me to his eye level. He slapped my face to get me to regain consciousness again. "Now I'm going to ask you one more time kin, kinny," he said smiling rubbing my cheek. "Where's the envelope baby" he smiled kissing my head.

"come on, you can tell papa where it is".

With the last bit of strength, I had I look my father in the eyes. "I....do...don't know" I saw my fathers fist speed towards my face but welcomed darkness before the blow could occur.

Mature scene over

Third person POV.

He dropped her body on the ground and paced around hitting his head over and over again. "Gotta find that envelope, gotta find the tape before they find out". He looked and Kinsley and landed another kick to her unconscious body before storming to his room.

What's on the tape that he's so afraid of?