the mysterious eyes of swaggersouls

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dammit, audrey

love you, swags🙈

what a hottie😍

got so scuffed after this.

"hey dad." i called, padding down the stairs to be greeted with an empty house. "thank god." running back up the stairs, my eyes looked to my bed, by body yearning to lie back down and sleep for days. i decided against that and to scan through my closet for clothes instead. ripping off the clothes from last night, i pull over a black jumper that had writing on the front and a pair of ripped blue jeans. i slide into the bathroom to do my hair. i fix up my edges with a toothbrush and gel and leave the rest down.

peering at myself, i finally feel the guilt wash away. well not completely. but i was finally able to appreciate myself again. "lookin good, audrey." i give myself finger guns and once again race down the stairs to strap on my tan birkenstock's.

-

arriving at their front porch i heard shouting and obvious game play through out the house. i knocked consistently before someone opened the front door. "oh, hey audrey?" swagger questioned, standing in front of the door just enough so i couldn't see in. "we're kind of busy at the moment..."

"matt! get your skinny ass down here before i beat your ass myself!" i had never heard mason so pissed off in my life, yet again i've only known him for 3 years total. my eyes narrowed as swagger cleared the lump in his throat.

cam texted me. he wants me inside, but i knew swags wasn't going to let me by too easy. "seriously audrey, i don't think this is a good time."

"dammit matt, unlock your fucking door you cunt!" shaking my head, i look up to the windows to see cam banging his head on one of the many. his eyes found me and pleaded for me to take him away from the nonsense his friends were arguing about.

"i just wanna speak with cam." swagger shook his head, irritated with my persistent pushing. "thanks, eric." i sang and pushed past him. "mason, what's going on?" i whisper enough so swagger would know i was speaking to him.

"matt is being a cunt. he is trying to put himself into a coma from alcohol. he literally has all of the fucking bottles in his room." my eyes widen as i look to the locked door. i knew that whatever i tried to do to help wouldn't increase the percentage of matt opening his door, so i continued on with my journey to cam's room.

"thank god you're here." he sighed with exhaustion. "i don't know how much more of these fuckers i can stand." he chuckled and fell back onto his bed. "after all this time i finally moved back here from new zealand to be with them, and now i want to move back."

"welp, i would be lying if i said i wanted to move back to oregon, but ya know." i shrugged and plopped down beside him.

"i forgot you moved over there after you and matt broke up..." i nodded and opened my phone. he glared down to it and i snapped a picture of him.

"that's my new lock screen." i chuckled and went into my settings to do so. "come here." i demand as i prop up my phone on his desk. i pulled him closer and posed for the picture. "your lighting is absolutely fucked in here."

hanging with @goodguyfitz out of all the people in the world :/

"wow, am i really that lame?" my shoulders shrugged and he laughed nervously.

"i'm joking, cam." when i said his name i noticed his mood pipe up, making me immediately become more content with my being. "so, what do you wanna do?" i query, falling to my back on the cushioned bed. he landed beside me, staring to the ceiling again. "since i wasn't completely sober, can we talk about our dreams again?" his head shifted to look at me. "if you don't want to-"

"yeah. i do actually. i don't have enough people i can be real with. when i'm with the boys it's all jokes." he huffed and scratched at his face. "you go first this time." closing my eyes i let my mind wonder. "what ever comes to mind first you have to speak it aloud."

"you." i grin, seeing his face pop in my imagination. i could almost sense the shock that ran through him. "actually, a lot of my thoughts consist of you, cam. i think that you are the most interesting person i know. and that's me being genuine. i think about you daily. like i'll be sittin in bed and wonder what you're doing." i paused and re opened my eyes. "i think about how your arctic blue eyes hold back so many tears and how they have seen so many things i can't even talk about because of how disturbing they are."

"loli-"

"don't finish that fucking sentence." i fell into a tiny fit of laughter and rolled onto my stomach so my face was in his blankets. "then again, i think about how boring you can be."

"i am not boring, cunt. otherwise you wouldn't be here." he chuckled and also turned to lay on his stomach.

"cam, i adore you." i beamed, running my fingertips through the his blond hair. it was almost as if his breath had dissipated as the normal soft exhale came out much heavier.

"my turn." he huffed. "if i'm being completely honest, you fog my mind a lot. i think of how mistreated you were back in 2016. which i know, is stupid since it was years ago. but i think of how unique you are and how you deserved so much better. its just like every time i see your face i can only think about you and matt and it makes my throat swell up and it just takes my breath away."

we laid in silence as we just took in each other's presence. there was no doubt that we both shared something, but i took it as more of a best friend type of scenario. he was a sincere person and his words made butterflies soar through my stomach, but it just seemed so natural to feel this way around him.

i turn back and stare to the ceiling, feeling the bed shift as cameron does the same. switching to being able to rest my head on his chest, i listen to his heart beat and automatically feel drowsy. "thank you for being here for me, cam. i appreciate your friendship."

"yeah, our friendship." his voice was barely audible as i fell asleep on his chest.