When you love someone, you protect them from the pain. You don't become the cause of it.

I dropped my phone to the ground with a thud. Did I seriously just hear him right?

"Lex? Alexis are you okay?" I hear my brother's frantic voice coming from the device now sitting by my feet. I lean down and put my head in my hands.

The killer. He's back. He's going to find me and kill Claire and Niall and all the other boys just like in my nightmares.

This can't be real. It must be another nightmare. Soon I'll wake up and Niall will be there to sing me back to sleep just like he does every night. This is all in my mind. My head playing tricks on me. But why does it feel so real?

"Lex?" I hear Niall's worried voice come from the living room as a tear rolls down my cheek. I don't say anything. Instead I pick up my phone, run upstairs, and shut the door roughly.

I run out to my balcony and cry my eyes out. I didn't care that it was around twenty degrees, maybe less. I didn't care that I wasn't in a coat or even shoes. I didn't care about anything except the fact that the man who destroyed my life is out there in the open, able to do whatever he wants on his own free will. It terrified me.

I sit there and cry more than I've cried in the past three years. I cried more than when my parents and Jake died. I cried more than when Niall and I were having problems. I cried more than when Derek said those awful accusations. But they weren't tears of sadness as much as they were tears of fear. Fear for me, for Claire, for Austin, for the boys. Fear for everyone that I could possibly think of ever being close to.

Soon enough the door opens, and Niall steps outside with me. "Talk to me," he says in a gentle tone, sitting down next to me and draping a blanket over my shoulders. He hugs me to keep me warm even though he didn't look too warm himself. I cry into his chest, soaking his shirt. I shake my head.

"This can't be happening. Just when everything is perfect...."

"What happened?" he asks, obviously worried about me.

"He's free! He escaped! He's out there somewhere probably taking more lives! Lives that mean something to someone! They probably have families and children and people who care about them, and he's out there in the open just killing them off one by one!" I rant, more tears flowing. He comforted me just like he usually does each night, except this time it didn't work. It did nothing to calm me down or stop me from shaking. I'm sure Niall is smart enough to figure out who I was talking about.

"He's not going to come near you."

"You don't know that!" I snap. I instantly regretted being so nasty, but was too upset and traumatized to think straight. "You can't see the future...."

"No, but I can predict. And I think that as long as we have security and body guards, you are going to be one hundred percent safe." I cuddle into him closer.

"What if he finds me and kills me? What if he kills you and Liam and Louis and Zayn and Harry? What if he kills Claire or Austin?"

"He's not going to kill anyone."

"I had a dream about this! He was standing in the freaking living room downstairs! Everyone I loved was dead!"

"Calm down," he says, rubbing circles on my back. I shut my eyes and let the tears fall. I kept telling myself that I would be okay. That we would all be okay. But something in my gut wouldn't believe it. A million things raced through my head and my breathing sped up.

"Alexis I don't want you to get hurt! Stay downstairs!"

Jake running to the second floor. Me following him.

"Please don't hurt our daughter!"

Two shots.

"Drop the shovel..."

The gun pressed to my head.

"Sit over there and don't say a word or I'll shoot you both!"

Jake mouthing the words 'I love you' just before his life ended.

I imagined it being Niall instead of Jake. I can't handle that. Just the thought of losing Niall to that man makes me want to shrivel up and die. Extreme, I know. But I honestly think I can't live without him. Avoiding him for a few months is one thing, and look how well that turned out, but having him completely vanish from the earth would probably destroy me.

"I love you," I remind him through my sobs. He gently kisses my head.

"I love you too," he says in a soft voice.

"I can't lose you."

"And you're not going to."

I look up at him. "Do you promise?"

"I promise."

I hope he keeps this promise. My phone rang again. It was Austin. I press ignore.

"You should answer him," Niall says softly. "He's probably worried." I take a deep breath to try and calm down when the phone rings again. This time, I press answer and push the phone to my ear.

"Alexis, are you okay? Be honest. I heard a thump. What happened?" he asks in a panicky voice.

"I-I'm fine," I lie. He sighs.

"No, you're not. I know you." I wipe away more tears. "Look, I know you're about to hate me. You're probably going to scream or cry or punch something, but I have to tell you something. And it's not debatable." I waited for him to go on, afraid of what he would say.

"You're flying out to California and living with me. It's not safe in London anymore, and I'm not comfortable with you and Claire being there without me to protect-"

"No!" I cut him off. "No, Austin. I'm not doing that!" There was no way he was ripping me from my life.

All of my fears are coming true. This can't be real. I'm dreaming. It's a nightmare.

"If you don't fly out here yourself then I'm flying over there to get you. There's no other option."

"I have my career here! I have my friends, my boyfriend, everything! You aren't making me leave! You can't! I'm eighteen and I can do what I want!" I yell into the phone.

"Not when there's a killer loose!"

"I have body guards, security. People will protect me and Claire. We will be fine! But there is no way you can possibly force me to leave. Don't even try."

"I may not be able to make you, but I'm not letting Claire stay there and get killed. If you want to be stupid and get yourself, and possibly others, murdered in the process, then go ahead. But I don't want Claire involved. She has her entire life ahead of her, and I tried to warn you." I let more tears fall. "We've already lost two members of this family. Look how hard that was. If you want to be responsible for causing me and Claire to lose another then go ahead. Put us through more."

Then he hung up. I gripped the phone tight. I wanted to smash it. I wanted to scream at the top of my lungs. I didn't know what to do. I felt strong arms wrap around me and my tense body relaxed.

"It's okay," Niall whispers.

"No," I say. "It's not."

AUTHORS NOTE