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it's been a week of me doing nothing but laying on my back, eating tasteless food, throwing up almost everything I eat and having nurses around me to help me with the daily 5 minute walk around the room that I am pretty sure I don't need help with.

the doctor came every single day and gave me some pills that will help with my physical strength.

thankfully carlos didn't come at all, that night was the last time I saw him. however he had some orders.

I spent the moments where I wasn't throwing up or walking thinking of memories and a plan in case domenico doesn't help me.

but I came up with nothing helpful.

I thought about the baby and I still don't know what to do, not like I can do much tho.

it's 9 pm now, the night nurse just came in and is sitting on the sofa reading a book from the library.

I wanted to read something but they had to ask him first and he said no.

I don't really care about that tho because I rather think of a way out than read and wish my life was different.

the door burst open making both me and the nurse jump, we looked at the door to see carlos standing there and glaring at me.

he turned his glare to the nurse and yelled "LEAVE!", fear replaced whatever emptiness I was feeling but it was nothing compared to the fear I felt when he locked the door after she left.

I looked at my bare thighs and trailed my finger over the edge of the shorts I am wearing trying to calm down.

I would've worn an entire closet if it was for me but just like everything, he chose clothes for me everyday.

it was either I stay naked or wear what he chose.

he grabbed my hair harshly making my scalp burn, I winced but it soon turned into a scream when he pulled me down and I fell off the bed and to the floor.

my arm immediately went to my stomach and I glared at him to see him already glaring at me.

"you know at first I thought breaking you and making you submit into marrying me was a good idea." he said the smell of alcohol in his breath freaking me out... he's drunk.

he tugged my hair making me look up more then chuckled and said " but when you thought killing yourself was an option I decided you will be my wife the moment you wake up.".

I kept my glare on trying not to give away my fear but I doubt it covered anything because I am shaking.

he laughed and said "then again, I saw you when you woke up and just like always you let your smart mouth get to me and I decided to break you first, then marry you. but you know what?".

I stayed silent and moved my hands to his on my hair trying to ease his grip.

he brought me closer to his face by my hair and yelled "I AM FED UP WITH YOU AND YOUR ATTITUDE, YOU'RE GOING TO MARRY ME WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT!".

"let go" was all I said not wanting to make things worse, he's a psychopath without drinking, being drunk is only making things worse.

he surprisingly let go and I immediately rubbed my sore scalp.

he suddenly pushed me back and my head hit the floor making me groan in pain, a second later he hovered over me making every memory of him raping me flash through my eyes.

I put my hand on his chest and tried to push him away but he grabbed my wrists and pinned them above my head before sinking his teeth in my flesh earning a scream from me.

"carlos please stop, remember what the doctor said." I said trying to push him away by arching my back.

he chuckled and said "it doesn't matter, you don't want the baby and I don't either.", that sentence froze me.

I began wiggling against him but stopped when a stinging pain spread across my cheek.

he brought my hands and placed them above my chest then pressed a little pinning me down and unbuckled his pants with his free hand making my struggles increase.

"carlos no! stop!" I protested but all I got was him ripping my shorts down, tears stained my face and fell into the floor as I tried to break free from his tight grip.

he placed a kiss on my neck and in an instant thrusted in me making an electric pain shoot all over my abdomen.

I shook in pain and screamed on top of my lungs as a new set of uncontrollable tears streamed down my face.

he groaned and said "what's the point of keeping something that would share you with me and take all your attention if it's not changing your mind?" before thrusting in me again increasing the paining pressure in my abdomen.

"CARLOS please, I beg you! stop." I begged but it got covered by my scream as he thrusted in me again.

he chuckled and said " you should know by now that you asking me to stop only makes me want to do more.".

I cried out again when he thrusted in me and closed my eyes to do what I always do, think of something else.

but all I came to was him on top of me raping me like an animal, I screamed again and again but he only stopped when he came in me which was after a few minutes.

he groaned then pulled away looking down at me, he smirked and said "I just fucked it out of you just like I fucked it in you.".

I clutched my stomach and let all my tears out at the shivering pain I am feeling, it feels like someone just stabbed my abdomen and is twisting the knife.

a stinging pain hit my hand that is on my stomach making me scream in pain, I involuntarily brought my hand to my chest but I wish if I didn't.

he raised his arm as high as he can and landed a whip on my stomach earning a scream unlike any other.

I clutched my stomach with my now red hand and looked at him with my tears blurred vision, "p-please sto" I managed to say through my sobs but one interrupted my words.

he kicked the hand on my stomach with enough force to turn me over and yelled "THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT AMBER, IF YOU SAID YES FROM THE BEGINNING NONE OF THIS WOULD'VE HAPPENED." landing another whip on my back.

"carlos please, yes, just stop." I cried out in hopes of being able to save this baby from dying like this.

he chuckled like the mad man he is and landed another whip on my waist then said "it's too late because you will marry me whether you say yes or no.".

I clutched my stomach tighter and curled into a ball feeling the wetness between my thighs as my body shivered from the pain, my breath hitched and the room began spinning around me.

I felt him turning me over which cause a needle like pain to stand out and I winced then screamed when he stepped on my stomach putting half of his weight on it.

that was enough to make my already blurred vision blur with dark spots, I let out a cry one last time before I closed my eyes unable to keep them open anymore.