《A Series of Mondays (girlxgirl / wlw)》Monday, September 14th

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PART III - HELEN

Mrs. Carter meant well, I knew that, but I had a hard time believing this was good.

I got the idea about Sofia and me spending time together and getting to know each other but I wasn't sure Sofia was a person I wanted to get to know. She was the typical "I don't care what everyone thinks about me" person. The rebellious teenager. Did I admire that attitude? Definitely. Did I think I needed another Jonathan in my life? Most definitely not.

I took out my diary.

Working with Sofia – Pros

- She is a good student (Jonathan asked for her GPA and she said it had been perfect at her last school)

I tapped my pen against the paper.

Come one, Helen, you should be able to find at least three points!

- She is playing Romeo. We should become more comfortable around each other. I am not only going to spend the next few weeks working with her, but I am also going to have to portray a believable romance with her

- She gets things done (see her becoming Romeo)

I read through the three bullet points again and again until I felt the panic in my head calming down. Then I put down another point because I thought about something my therapist had often said when I was still seeing her.

- It is not her intention to ruin my school year.

That sounded about right, even though I wasn't sure it was true.

No, of course, it was true. Not the whole revolved around me. Sofia was just another person living her own life.

During rehearsal, Jonathan, who was portraying Friar Laurence, Sofia, and I were dismissed. While Mrs. Carter was talking to the others about the backdrop, Sofia was sitting on the edge of the stage, with her feet dangling and thumping against the wood in a distinct rhythm. Dum dum dum-dum-dum-dum. Dum dum dum-dum-dum-dum. Sitting in the first row with the script on my legs, I was staring at her, hoping she would notice. Which she didn't.

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"Hi," said Jonathan sitting down next to her.

"Hi," she replied and immediately stopped moving her feet.

"Would you like to do the English book project together? You're new, so I thought I'd take you under my wing." He clicked his tongue and bit his lip. Was he nervous? I had suspected that he had a crush on her, now it seemed obvious.

Sofia shrugged her shoulders apologizingly: "Helen and I are going to work together."

My heart jumped a beat. I realized that I had expected her to accept Jonathan's offer – that I had only dreamt this morning – or that she would rather work with Jonathan than with me – that it didn't matter to her what Mrs. Carter asked of us.

"You and –" He shot me a short glance. "Okay."

"Hi, babe." That came from Jamie who dropped into the seat beside me.

"What are you already doing here?" His practice wasn't supposed to end for another half hour, and I was supposed to meet him outside the gym.

Apparently, this wasn't the reaction he'd expected and he rolled his eyes. "I'm also happy to see you."

I kissed him to show him that I was, in fact, happy to see him, too.

I must've missed parts of their conversation because Jonathan laughed unamused, then his face turned serious. "You wanna make this a contest? It's on."

What had happened while Jamie had come in? I looked back and forth between them. Jamie leaned his head towards me and whispered, "What is going on over there?"

Not knowing myself, there was nothing to do than to shrug my shoulders.

Sofia shook Jonathan's outstretched hand. "You're never gonna beat us. We are the best students in our class. We are unbeatable."

He scoffed, and leaned over to her, just as Jamie did seconds ago to me. I was bemused by this intimacy they already displayed. Even though Jonathan hushed his voice, I could understand every word he said: "Have you ever worked with Helen? No, of course not. It's basically impossible. She's not quite the team player."

Instead of either a) defending me, or b) agreeing with him, she just said: "Neither am I. Aren't those the best conditions?"

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