I fell to the floor and gripped my jaw. "What the hell Vanessa?"

"I'm about to beat your ass." I went to get up and she placed her shoe on my chest pinning me to the ground. "Three weeks Y/n? Three weeks- you had the fucking audacity to ignore my calls!?"

Welp, looks like fear is back.

I gulped as she straddled me and gripped my shirt all in one swift motion. "I-I'm sorry I didn't-"

She slapped me. Hard. "Not only did you make Quincy cry, but you also made Travis cry too."

And that's when everything hit me. Travis, I left fucking Travis because I was too busy trying to ignore my pain by sleeping with anyone I could.

I left my brother. The brother who I know was taking this harder than me.

"And you- oh," she caressed my cheek. "Did I hit you too hard? I didn't mean to make you cry ba- actually I did fuck you," she climbed off and sat next to me. "What happened?"

I sniffed as my heart took jab after jab of pain. "I-I forgot about Travis, I tried to ignore all of my feelings and because of that I forgot about Travis."

She laid back sighing. "I realized something, when I first met you I thought the way you would always put everyone first was adorable but after this stunt you pulled," she smacked my stomach. "I realized you only put them first because it benefited you."

I sniffed and nodded looking over at her. "Your right, shit I'm a fuck up."

"No, you just fucked up." She shook her head.

"Yeah, I fucked up bad," I groaned. "Travis needed me, I haven't seen Jasmine in three- my fucking baby, I haven't talked to my baby in three weeks Ness, I-I can't go see them they probably hate-"

"Y/n look, the thing about Travis, Quincy, and Jasmine is that they know and love you. Quincy isn't mad at you he's upset because he couldn't help you, Travis isn't mad at you he just misses you and Jasmine...well Jasmine is pregnant so one minute she's pissed at you then she's sad because she misses you and then she's happy that your at least alive...point is," we both chuckled. "They love you and they may be upset at first but trust me they'll forgive you," she raised a brow. "Me on the other hand," we chuckled again and then she frowned. "Why didn't you talk to me?"

I shook my head. "Because nobody would understand the pain I'm going through other than Travis."

She scoffed. "You can't just assume-" she nodded and stood up grabbing my arm roughly. "Come on you dick." I jumped up stumbling over my feet as she pulled me outside to the patio. "Staying at the fucking Peninsula." I chuckled as she pushed me down to the ground and sat in front of me. "Don't laugh, I don't like you right now."

I nodded and grabbed her hands. "I'm sorry for just up and leaving and ignoring you and everyone else. Something I do a lot is run away from my problems so that I don't have to feel pain because that shit sucks," rolled my eyes as they started to water. "And my fucking mom, I can't survive without her I just didn't want to accept the fact that she's..." I shook my head and looked down.

She sighed and scooted closer to me. "Same thing that happened to you happened to me." She whispered as I frowned looking back up at her. "My dad killed um...he killed my mom when I was nineteen." I went to talk and she shook her head. "Shhh, Y/n I know exactly the pain your feeling but you didn't even think to talk to me or any fucking one and that shit hurts-"

I nodded. "I know Nessa I'm sorry."

"Stop apologizing and stop cutting me off," she gripped my hand. "That hurt but, I understand. When my mom died I tried to tell myself that what happened was an accident that he loved her and he didn't mean to. Everyone kept trying to tell me that I had to forget him and hate him but I just couldn't because we've always been so close."

Her voiced cracked and she cleared her throat as I wiped away a tear that fell down her cheek. "Actually until you left um I didn't realize how bad the way I acted was. I got into a huge argument with my brother after a month or so and I neglected him. I ignored him and I was an asshole because I couldn't understand how he could just hate our father," she let out a shaky breath. "Y/n running away is never the answer especially when you have so many people that love you."

I nodded. "Your completely right Nessa and um, I'm sorry for your lost."

She shrugged. "I'm sorry for you lost."

I frowned and let out a shaky breath. "She's actually gone like, she's never coming back huh?" She shook her head pulling me into her. "I'm having a baby and my career is just starting to take off and Travis's birthday is next week I mean what the hell Vanessa?" Tears started to roll down my cheeks as I closed my eyes. "I-I can't- I mean this fucking pain..."

She nodded and caressed the back of my head. "It's going to hurt baby and it might hurt forever but you'll learn to deal with it." She leaned back and cupped my cheeks. "Everyone has to die even if we think it's too early it's just the way life is. With life comes pain, suffering, happiness, death, and well life. So yes, it'll take some time to be able to cope without your mom but, I'll be here every step of the way, I promise."

I shook my head and laid it on her shoulder. "Please don't promise me anything, she promised to always be with me but she's not anymore."

"Maybe not physically but trust me she is, shit my moms still with me. It's not the same but sometimes when I don't know what to do or I feel like jumping off a damn building I just close my eyes and think of the times I had with her and sometimes it feels like she's there with me while I'm crying j-just holding me," her voice started to shake as she sniffed. "I miss her so much but, I can't bring her back so, the memories I have with her eventually become enough and I'm able to go day by day without wanting to die and join her."

I sniffed as I turned my head meeting her eyes.

She wiped my cheek and smiled softly. "So like I said, I'll be here every step of the way and if you ever need someone to cry with again just call and I'll come running."

"Thank you."

"Of course baby."

-

I pulled up outside my house and let out a shaky breath. After my talk with Vanessa she slapped me once more and kicked me out of my hotel room.

And now I'm here.

I climbed out of my car and walked up to the door raising my hand to knock. Before I could knock the door flew open and there stood a confused boy. "Why are you here?"

I raised a brow. "I-I thought this was my house."

He scoffed. "You disappear and make Quincy cry for three weeks and now your back at "your house."

I stared at him for a while and then my eyes widened. "You're the dude from the party, valet."

He nodded with his arms crossed. "I'm also the guy whose been waking up at three in the morning and driving thirty minutes just to hold Quincy while he cried."

My heart dropped. "Thank you."

"How dare- what?"

"Thank you for taking care of him, I hate the fact that he was torn up because I don't know how to deal with my emotions so thank you for being here."

His jaw fell slightly as he stammered. "I-I um y-yeah I- you better be thankful," he rolled his eyes. "Let me stop actually um fuck you for making him cry but thank you for helping get closer to him. I love that guy but damn he's stubborn."

I chuckled. "Tell me about it-"

"I didn't hear the door close why are-"

Quincy came into view and his eyes widened. "Y-Y/n?"

"I'll leave you two to it." He kissed Quincy's cheek and walked past me sending a slight smile.

"Um, please don't hit me because-"

He pulled me into a hug and groaned. "I was worried sick Y/n, I didn't know how long you'd be gone and I couldn't reach you and help you and that fucking sucked dude."

I pulled his body closer to mines and shook my head. "I'm sorry Quincy, sooo fucking sorry."

He shook his head and leaned back. "Don't apologize to me please, I understand why you left," he smiled at me and sighed. "But, you need to apologize to your brother."

I nodded. "That was my next stop after apologizing to you."

He shook his head and glanced over my shoulder. "Dude you being back is apology enough I just need you to go talk to your brother now."

I nodded as we pulled away from each other. "Okay but still-"

"Shush."

"No your being too calm-"

"Go-"

"Quincy-"

"Y/n-"

"I'm sorry-"

"Upstairs," he placed his hand over my mouth before I could talk. "He's in your room." I chuckled behind his hand and nodded. He dropped it and pushed me inside the house. "My boyfriend knows me so well he didn't leave so go talk to Travis and when I come back you can apologize by cooking for me."

I nodded. "I love you."

He smiled. "I love you more."

I sighed as he walked out of the house.

Of course that was his reaction.

Heading upstairs my heart started to race. I made it to my bedroom door and gulped before knocking.

I heard footsteps and then the door was pulled open. "Quincy why are you knock- Y/n?"

As soon as I saw him the tears started to pour out. His eyes were red and puffy, he had bags, he looked pale...I bent down and pulled him into my arms. He quickly threw his arms around my neck.

"Your back, I thought you left me like mom did."

I shook my head. "No no, I'm sorry Trav."

He sniffed. "I needed you."

I nodded and leaned back. "I know but I'm here now and I'm going to do everything possible to make it up to you and make you feel better."

He frowned. "Why'd you leave me?"

I sighed and stood up nodding inside my room. "Let's sit."

He slowly walked into my room and sat on the bed causing me to sit next to him. "I didn't want to accept the fact that she was actually gone."

"Why."

"Because I would start to blame myself, because I never wanted her to...die, because I didn't want to feel pain."

Travis sighed. "It's not your fault Y/nn," he grabbed my hand and looked up at me. "She said it wasn't your or my fault."

I nodded. "I bet she did."

A tear rolled down his cheek.

"I'm not mad at you Y/n but I am disappointed because you're supposed to be my big sister but, Quincy, Vanessa, Jasmine, and Summer were the ones taking care of me."

"Travis I won't try and justify what I did because what I did wasn't right at all," I wiped his cheek. "I'll be here from now on okay?"

He shook his head. "Fine but you have to fix some stuff okay?" I nodded as he sat upon his knees and wiped my face. "Mom said some things before she..." Travis sighed and looked down at his hands. "She told me to let you know that she loves you and she's proud of you and everything you're doing. She said don't give up just because she's gone and don't be all sad," his voice cracked as tears rolled down both of our cheeks. "She also said to take care of me and your new family when your baby gets here." He shrugged. "Y/n your not doing any of her wishes and if your really sorry you'll make sure everything she wants to happen happens."

I sobbed and pulled him into me. "Dammit Trav, why are you so mature."

He chuckled and squeezed my head. "I haven't laughed for a long time."

I clenched my eyes shut. "Yeah, I bet."

He leaned back and slapped my forehead. "You really upset me."

I nodded. "And I'll fix it."

"Take me to the movies and for food."

I chuckled and pulled him into another hug. "Let's go."

-

Three down, one and a half to go. I hopped out of my car grabbing the bag of snacks I got for her.

The only way to tame a pregnant woman is with food, Quincy's words not mine.

I walked up to Jasmine's door and paced her porch for a while.

Right, she's pregnant and I have no idea how she'll react. Will she cut me? I know she hits harder than Vanessa. Maybe I should come back later.

I turned and walked off the porch before stopping.

No, I deserve whatever I have coming to me.

Walking back up to her porch I sat the bag down to the side where she wouldn't be able to see it and hovered my finger over the doorbell...then I chickened out and groaned.

Be a man Y/n just pushhh. I hit the doorbell and closed my eyes waiting for her to open the door. I heard the door open followed by a gasp.

Here it comes, she's going to kick my dick into my body. I felt arms wrapped around my neck and I started to gasp for air.

"What the hell are you doing?" Jasmine chuckled with watery eyes as she pulled back.

"I-I thought you were choking me."

She rolled her eyes and pulled me back into her. "I missed your dumbass."

I slowly wrapped my arms around her waist. "Y-your not mad?"

She sighed pulling back. "I was at first but, I had to realize who you were, then I realized that you'd figure it out." I sighed and then groaned as she kicked me in the balls. "But, just because I'm not mad anymore doesn't mean you're excused for putting your damn hands on me and you're definitely not excused for not being here for our baby."

I nodded as I slowly stood up. "Your a hundred percent right Jazzy," I nodded as I adjusted myself. "I'm sorry and I feel like shit for touching you."

She nodded. "It's okay, just don't pull shit like that again."

I looked down at her stomach to now see a small bump. Leaning down I kissed her stomach. "And I'm sorry for not being around you for-"

She pushed my face away. "Nah, you need to wait a bit before you can be all lovey-dovey with our son again." I pouted looking up at her and she smiled down at me. "I'm serious that's your punishment."

I nodded standing up straight. "Yes ma'am."

She sighed. "Dammit, come here."

She pulled me back into her and I inhaled her scent.

I missed her a lot. "I'm sorry again for touching you-"

"Y/n like I said, it's okay just don't let it happen again," she pulled back. "I know you were and still are going through a lot but, you ever grab me like that again and I'll cut off your dick.

I laughed. "Noted."

She leaned against her doorway smiling up at me. "You better?"

I shrugged. "I'm fine."

"Well," she bit her lip. "I'm happy your back."

"Same here," I cleared my throat and moved grabbed the bag from the side. "But as a thank you, and a way to stop you from hurting me, I brought you some snacks and I thought that maybe we could-"

"Hey Jaz I accidentally dropped your plate of spaghetti and I need to know-" some dude paused and looked up at me. "Oh shit, your Y/n Y/ln."

Who the fuck-

I frowned at Jasmine who was sheepishly biting her lip. "Ummm Y/n meet Eric."

The Eric guy held out his hand to me smiling. "Yup I'm Eric, the soon to be boyfriend." He winked at Jasmine who blushed.

And I'm dead.

-