I looked over at a sleeping Vanessa and climbed out of bed as I headed downstairs.

I didn't sleep at all last night thanks to Jasmine. I've been trying to debate on whether I should tell Vanessa or not- shit if Jasmine even knew what she did and said.

I mean, when Vanessa and Summer kissed she told me so maybe I should...I don't know.

I stopped and turned around as I spotted Quincy and Jasmine in the kitchen.

"Morning?" Quincy called out.

I put on a fake smile and turned back around avoiding Jasmine. "Morning."

He chuckled. "Were you trying to run?"

I shrugged and walked over to him still avoiding any acknowledgment towards Jasmine.

"Of course not."

He squinted and glanced over at Jasmine before looking back at me. He continued to stare until I got uncomfortable.

"Stop looking at me."

He raised a brow and tilted his head to the side as he continued to stare.

I groaned and looked over at Jasmine who was watching me with a squint.

"Why is everyone looking at me?"

Jasmine closed her eyes and exhaled slowly. "Y/n did...What I think happen actually happen?"

I hummed. "Ummmm what do you think happened?"

She raised a brow and glanced at Quincy. "Y/n seriously."

I sighed. "It happened."

"Fuck!"

I grimaced. "I didn't- I don't- I'm soooo sorry."

Quincy cleared his throat. "What's going-"

"Don't apologize you didn't do anything," she sighed and rested her head in the palm of her hands. "I'm sorry."

"Um, guys can-"

"W-What are you going to do?"

She looked up at me. "No what are you going to do?"

"What are you going to do for what?"

I jumped and looked at Vanessa who walked into the kitchen and up to me. She pecked my cheek before resting her head on my shoulder.

"So?"

I gulped and looked at Jasmine who was looking at me.

Quincy gasped. "Y/n you didn't."

I snapped my head towards Quincy. "No! I-I didn't I just didn't..."

"Can I be let in on the secret?" Vanessa raised a hand.

We all looked at Vanessa and yelled. "NO!"

She jumped and chuckled. "Okay?"

Quincy grabbed my arm and smiled at Vanessa. "I'll be taking your GIRLFRIEND for a little bit."

He dragged me upstairs and into his room as he slammed the door shut. I gulped as he walked up to me. "Did you cheat on her?"

I shook my head. "Not t-technically I-I mean," I leaned forward as I lowered my voice. "Jasmine was wasted and she admitted a lot and then she kissed me- but I didn't kiss her back."

"Did you push her away?"

I sighed and looked down. "No, I didn't know w-what to-"

"Did you like the kiss?"

I clenched my jaw and nodded. "M-Maybe I- Yes I did."

He sighed and backed away going to sit on his bed. "What are you going to do?"

I slid down the door feeling my whole body tense, and I think I have a stomach ache. "I-I don't know. If I tell her she might break up with me but, if I don't tell her she might find out and then break up with me."

"Tell her Y/n, she told you she kissed Summer and you two weren't even dating."

I scoffed. "Yeah after ignoring me for damn near a week. I think I have the right to sit back and think shit over before I immediately tell her."

"That won't be a good idea."

I groaned. "J-Just shut up please okay? I knew I should've backed away but I didn't- Dammit Quincy why didn't I push her away? If I pushed her away she wouldn't have kissed me," I gulped looking at Quincy. "Why did that kiss...Why did kissing Jasmine..."

He sighed. "Because you love Jasmine," he shrugged. "Maybe you should just break up-"

"No no, I'm not breaking up with her I love her."

He quickly nodded and dropped to his knees scooting towards me. "Trust me I know or else you wouldn't look like your about to puke," he chuckled and cupped my cheeks. "But if your feeling like that for after kissing Jasmine then...Should you really stay with Vanessa?"

I nodded without hesitation. "Yes."

First, I actually want Vanessa and she wants me. Second, why would I leave a girl who wants me just because I have feelings for a girl who doesn't want me? And finally, I would be an idiot to dump that beauty.

"I have to tell her."

Quincy raised a brow. "You sure?"

I shook my head. "When am I ever sure about anything?"

He chuckled and nodded. "True," he raised a brow. "So?"

"I'll...I'll figure it out."

-

I haven't figured shit out...It's been a week and I still haven't told her and I feel like at this point, if I were to tell her, she'd be fucking pissed.

But in my defense, I've tried to tell her about ten times.

The first time was right after I talked to Quincy.

The second time was literally the next day.

And the third time was New Years.

Basically, I missed my opportunity.

But other than that itsy bitsy secret, our relationship has actually been going great. I'm happy, I'm almost a hundred percent sure she's happy...

We're good.

"I see why you love cheesecake so much."

My heart cracked as Vanessa walked into my room placing the last bite of cheesecake into her mouth.

Never mind, I think it's time we broke up.

"Nessa what the hell?!"

She pouted. "I had cravings."

I groaned and flopped back onto the bed. "It's like your always on your damn period."

She straddled my hips and placed her hands on the side of my head. "I'm sorry, can I make it up?"

I rolled my eyes. "With bloody sex?"

Well...

She chuckled. "You actually thinking about it?"

I smiled softly. "Ew, gross, yuck- Unless you want to shower then..."

She laughed and I leaned up wrapping my arms around her waist.

"You're going to be with Summer all day tomorrow right?"

She nodded and placed her hands onto my shoulders. "Yup, we might not talk at all tomorrow because we're usually super busy so...Don't get jealous."

I scoffed. "I never get jealous."

She rolled her eyes. "Sure, I'm the only one who gets jealous huh?"

I raised a brow and smirked as her eyes widened. "Ohh you told on yourself-"

"Shut up!"

"No, you have to tell me now-"

She groaned.

"What do you get jealous of?"

She huffed. "Remember when we had sex in the shower?"

"Which time." She smacked my shoulder and I nodded. "Sorry, yeah I remember."

"Well, I told you that I can't have kids."

I nodded slowly. "Right yeah."

She looked down. "You have two kids with another woman and not to mention your in love with her...Of course, I get jealous when it comes to Jasmine."

I sighed. "I get it a hundred percent and I'll be honest with you, I don't know what to say to make your doubts go away. Us not being able to have biological kids doesn't mean I'll love you any less and that's really all you need to know."

She nodded and I lifted her chin before leaning up and pecking her lips.

I groaned as I pulled away. "You taste like cheesecake."

"Then kiss me more idiot."

-

"So Christmas is over, it's a new year, you ready to get back to work?" Lilly asked causing me to groan.

"I guess."

She chuckled. "Well, we have a bunch of collabs in-store, a tour, interviews..."

"When would the tour be?"

She shrugged. "Sometimes towards Summer."

"So a while?"

She nodded. "I set it up perfectly since you have two newborns."

"Awww so considerate."

She chuckled. "So, I set up a line of collabs. Your first collab will be in a month and that's with Jorja Smith."

I gasped as she continued.

"The next one will be with Sza."

I gasped louder. "Oh my God, me, Jorja Smith, and Sza? That sounds like a life I want to live, like an alternate universe where we're all madly in love with each other."

She chuckled. "Yeah? Sounds like a good ass story."

I chuckled and nodded. "Yeah if it was a story it'll have some double meaning ass title like, Old Love or something."

She nodded. "Sounds amazing, everybody should go read that."

We both laughed and I nodded. "Okay so, I have to mentally prepare myself, that's good."

She nodded. "You have a few interviews coming up in two weeks but we'll worry about that when it comes. That's really all I have."

I nodded as we both stood. "Good, get home safe okay?"

She nodded and pulled me into a hug as we both said our goodbyes.

I walked out of the room and towards the elevator just as my phone began to ring.

"Hello?"

"Y/n."

My heart sped up at the sound of Jasmine's voice, we barely talked for the past week, I mean I've literally sent Quincy over to go pick up the kids so I wouldn't see her.

"J-Jazzy what's up?"

"I need some um...support with these dang on kids so...I would appreciate it if their mom came and kept me company?"

A bunch of warning bells went off in my head but, I sighed.

Of course, I'm going to go.

"I'll be there in twenty."

-

"You know," I cleared my throat as I laid Zion down. "He went down pretty easily. I'm starting to think you just wanted to see me."

She chuckled as she sat down. I sat next to her and raised a brow. "You caught me," she looked over at me. "Granted you have been ignoring me."

I nodded. "I'm sorry I just..."

"You haven't told her huh?"

I sighed and looked down. "No I haven't, I tried to but it hasn't worked out in my favor, plus I'm kind of scared." She nodded. "Have you told Rain?"

"Well, considering the fact that he went on a date with some guy two days after Christmas, I didn't feel the need to tell him."

I raised a brow looking back at her. "A date? I thought you two were serious."

She hummed. "Remember I asked you for advice? Well, I talked to him and said exactly what I said to you and it turns out we're both on the same page. We both like each other but, he doesn't want to settle and I'm...me so we kind of have like a friends with benefits type thing. Sex, dates, gifts, but were not exclusively together."

We could've...Y/n NO.

I nodded. "Well lucky you."

She chuckled. "Why are you scared?"

"I don't want to lose her," I shook my head. "I know this might sound selfish but, she makes me feel worth it you know? If she dumped me I would honestly be super hurt."

Jasmine nodded. "Right yeah, I get it."

We sat in silence for a few before I jumped feeling her head on my shoulder. "I'm sorry for fucking shit up again."

I looked down at her. "You okay?"

She looked up at me and held eye contact for a few seconds. I saw a million emotions flash through her eyes but, two stood out.

Sadness and regret.

"I'm fine." She looked back down.

"Jazzy you know there's no point in trying to hide your emotions."

She chuckled. "Well then you know there's no point in trying to get answers out of me."

I chuckled and nodded. "Yes, I do."

I looked down at our hands that were centimeters away from each others. Her pinky brushed against mines and she let out a shaky breath.

I gulped and pulled my hand away placing it onto my lap. Jasmine lifted her head and cleared her throat standing. "I um, have a surprise."

I raised a brow. "Yeah?"

She bit her lip. "I restocked-"

"THE FRIDGE-"

She slapped her hand over my mouth and I slapped mines over her hand as I looked back at the twins.

Slowly looking back at her I was met by a glare and gulped. I winced as she grabbed me by my ear and dragged me out of the room.

"Owwww," I smacked her hand away and stood up straight pointing at her. "I'm not your damn kid Jasmine."

She grabbed my finger and leaned up. "Then don't act like it bitch."

I squinted as I tried to hold back a smile. "Make me."

She raised a brow. "You want a whooping? Cause I'll give you something to cry about."

I laughed and pushed her back. "Shut the fuck up."

She smiled and nodded. "But yes I did restock the fridge."

I clapped and wrapped my arms around her waist as I threw her over my shoulder causing her to squeal.

"Put me down Y/n-"

"Shut up, its cheesecake time."