Sweet as Venom

Chapter 7

I was never really great when it came to feelings. In fact when it came to emotions I just sucked. I never could understand why dad never cried when he lost mum. I never got it why Leigh would hide his emotions from me.

Then I was no better. I still remember crying into my pillows of a night. It was easier to put on a front then admit you were struggling.

I reached for the bottle of vodka and twisted the cap.

I guess when it came down to it, I didn't like others seeing a side of me that wasn't strong or bullet proof.

I pushed open the cabin door and began to walk down the small path to the bins. I had planned on just taking out the rubbish that was till I saw a bared back man sitting on top of one of the picnic tables.

It had been a stinking hot day and only now as the sun had set was it finally cooling down.

I dropped the plastic bag in the rubbish and slowly walked over to him.

"Good night for it." I glanced up at the stars which seemed to have all his attention.

He turned back to look at me. His lips splitting into a half grin.

"It's finally cooling down." He exhaled sharply on a cigarette, the smoke slowly escaping his lips.

"Sorry about earlier with your truck if I caused a problem." I stepped up on the bench and sat next to him.

Saxon's eyes locked with mine and it was as if he could see straight through me- and I hated it.

"See you have some clothes on now." He smirked and handed me the lit cigarette.

"Good thing or bad thing?" I smirked back at him, taking it.

He shrugged his shoulders but gave me a smile that could buckle knees.

God when he looked like that.

I shallowed sharply. Just try and keep your cool I repeated to myself.

"Your brother will be back tomorrow."

"Thanks for reminding me."

"Irish still doesn't like the idea of you working for us but he will come around."

"Leigh doesn't like the idea that I'm growing up or more importantly impacting his way of life."

"His way of life?"

"Yeah his freedom. I'm like a big fat responsibility in his eyes and he hates it. He never wanted to look after his little sister."

"I think you take care of yourself, don't you?"

I thought I did but I doubted that was how Leigh saw it. "I think Leigh sees it differently. You're meant to be his hide away from the world, which is why I need to think about moving on."

"Moving on? You just got here." Something changed in his voice. As if he didn't like the idea of me leaving.

"I'm putting you out." I gave him a flat look. "You're the president of a motorcycle gang that deals in criminal activities the last thing you want is some needy teenage around."

"You aren't needy."

"I'm using your cottage."

"Which would be empty if you weren't in it."

"So it really doesn't bother you I'm here."

I don't know how it happened or when it happened but I somehow had moved closer to him; or maybe he moved closer to me.

"Nah sweetheart it doesn't bother me." He took the cigarette from my fingers.

"For someone who is meant to be hard you are mighty soft."

He coughed out a mouth full of smoke. "Is that right, and how am I meant to act?"

"Like Leigh wants you too." I arched both my eyebrows "Mean, cruel and unforgiving."

"Maybe you're just too pretty to be those things too."

I laughed. "Please as if you have time for me when you have plenty of women falling down to their knees for you. Got to ask, how do you stand it?"

I had seen how club girls were around him. They were so sweet, over caring and darn straight sucking up to him.

"What you mean?"

"I mean how do you put up with all the sucking up. God if you asked a girl to blow you, she would be on her knees in a second."

He smirked but didn't say anything. Sure the man was good looking, he would give Brad Pitt a run for his money then add on the bad boy image and you just have this walking, talking sexy stick.

I got why girls did it.

I just didn't get why he liked it.

"You like it don't you."I shook my head. "What is it? The power or the fact that no girl says no?"

He grinned a foolish grin at me. "Don't know what you're talking about darling." He leant in closer to me, his eyes still staying locked with mine, "After all I don't have you on your knees do I?"

"Yeah but I'm different."

"How's that?"

"I'm not one of the many."

"It's cause you're not interested darling, that's why."

I laughed again. "Please Saxon you are a sex stick and you know it." My smile dried up and I kept my eyes on him "A girl would be blind not to fancy you."

"Pity you're too young to know what you're talking about."

"You mean, pity you're too old to get what I'm talking about."

He shook his head "Dance with fire."

"I know and I get burnt." I shrugged my shoulders. "What's the point of living if you are too worried about collecting scars on the way." I slid off the picnic table and stood up. "Night Saxon."

"You're too young."

"For what?"

"To have scars."

I stopped in front of him and reached out for his hand, taking it in mine. I lifted up my shirt and ran his hand over the scar across my stomach.

His touch sent shivers down my spine, and I let his hand hover on my bare stomach.

Ok maybe this wasn't such a good idea. What was I doing again? Oh right proving a point.

His hand slowly moved across my stomach, till he gripped my hip and pulled me forward and I didn't fight it.

He jumped off the table, and his other arm wrapped around my back; and all I could do was stare up at him.

His touch was so soft, so inviting and I found my arms reaching out for him till they were locked around his neck.

He dipped his head down, his mouth just touching my ear. "You sure you want more?"

"You can't scar me." My words mightn't have stumbled out but I felt nervous and a complete wreck. "You would have to hurt me for that to happen."

"Baby girl all I do is hurt people."

I let go of him and ran my fingers across his jaw "You shouldn't be so hard on yourself."

"You shouldn't be so trusting."

"I'm not."

And it was the honest truth. I didn't trust anyone. But with him something was different. Something told me deep down he wasn't going to hurt me- that he couldn't even if he wanted too.

I reached up on my toes, my lips close to his. "The question is Saxon, do you trust me?"

"You're tempting me."

I smirked and pulled away from him. "Maybe when you have a better answer we can pick up where we leave this."

He pulled me back in tightly, "And who said I'm ready to leave this where it is?"

My fingers ran down his bare back "Because you don't trust me and how can you fuck someone you don't trust."

"Easily."

I laughed and met his eyes. "You would say that. Guess I'm just too young to give up on trust yet."

"So if I said I trusted you, you would give it up to me, right here, right now."

"Right now yes. Right here no. I don't do it in public." I sighed and placed my hand on his. "So you should get back to me, when you work out your whole trusting issue."

I stepped back out of his grasp and turned away and walked back to the cottage.

My heart beat was pumping outside my chest. I can't believe I managed to get through that without stumbling a word.

"Night Gabriella"

I squeezed my eyes shut tight- god I loved the sound of my name coming off his lips.

"Night Saxon."

I walked aimless back to the cottage- maybe he didn't trust me tonight but I was more than sure that one day he would.

--

If school was meant to be hell- then they had succeed. I even had my own personalised devil named Sarah, the one that not only controlled the population of this hell but also replaced me as a daughter in my father eyes.

I couldn't say that I made friends. Just as I had thought, I some how had managed to find myself hanging out with the kids that were the outcasts. Jayden for example. He somehow was popular yet kept an outcast tag.

It didn't take me long to work out that Sarah had a thing for him either. I guess that only scored me more of her hate.

So why I attempted to keep my head down and in the books, Jayden just kept dragging them out of them.

"Come on Gabs you can't study all the time." He slapped his hand over my textbook.

"It's not studying all the time it's called doing the class work." I pushed his hand off. "Don't you have someone else to annoy?"

I seriously didn't get why the kid hung around me. He had no interest in class or class work and all I did was 'have my head in the books.'

"Party this weekend, please tell me your coming."

"Jayden it's Monday you can't seriously be thinking of the weekend already?"

He winked "That's all I think about babe."

Babe.

I chewed my bottom lip.

"If I say I'll think about it, will that get you off my back?"

"Yep."

"Then I'll think about it."

"Score."

"It's not that exciting." I scoffed.

"Trust me, drinking and partying with me is fun. You won't regret."

I think I was already regretting thinking about it.

---

Leigh came back today and I didn't see him this morning but I noticed his bike in the yard. I had chosen to walk to school, so I left early and I had every intention on walking back to the clubhouse till my eyes laid on the muscular biker parked outside my school.

And somehow I didn't think he came just for the fun of it.

"You lost Saxon?" I walked up to him.

He looked like his scary self, and students were giving him a wide birth. Even the two car parks next to him were empty.

"Was going to offer you a ride this morning but you took off before I got a chance."

"And why would you be wanting to give me a ride?"

He shrugged his shoulders "Just being a good bloke."

"Uhuh."

"You weren't planning on walking home were you?" His disapproval was clear in his voice. "Cause that is a long ass walk."

"Maybe I need the exercise."

"You don't."

"Thanks. I think." I smirked at him. "So you really came here to give me a ride?"

"Not embarrassed to be seen with me are you?" He handed me a helmet.

"No." I took it. "But just so you know I'm clingy on the back. Kind of got this fear of falling off."

His lips cracked into a wide grin. "That's only the best thing I've heard all day sweetheart."

I clicked the helmet on and cocked my leg over, climbing on.

As only as I didn't let my hands shake I'd be fine. Then he wouldn't know how really nervous I was.

I snaked my arms around him and did my best not to cling to tightly.

He cocked his head over his shoulder "You going to really hang onto me or you going to make me, make you."

I tightened my grip immediately. No way was I letting him make me hold on tighter. Sure I enjoyed the open air but I wasn't stupid there was nothing between us and the road.

"Promise me you're a good rider." I asked nervously.

"Guess you'll just have to trust me."

I shook my head and we peeled away from the school. Yeah well I guess I was just going to have to trust him.