《No Filter x Serial Dating》Date Material
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Zushi the Sushi Roll has a front row seat to Killua's downfall.
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on led the way to the stairwell that could, potentially, fit the width of a bulldozer. It was so goddamn wide, Killua wondered what the purpose of such a stairwell was. Killua stood at the landing just before the gym basement, realizing that an entire ten Killuas could stand shoulder-to-shoulder and still have room for more on the stairwell.
Gon and Zushi were already at the end of the stairwell by the time Killua's focus returned. He hurried down, shoveling Noods in his mouth so that he could just be done with the bowl sooner rather than later. He didn't want to walk through the entire gym eating.
The basement appeared to be some sort of free weight room. There was a wall of mirrors like this was a ballet class and Killua came severely underprepared. When Gon walked through, Killua wasn't all that surprised to see that everyone seemed to know who Gon was. There had to be about six guys in the basement that day and every last one of them waved to Gon. They passed a burly looking fella with familiar-looking biceps.
Killua's palms grew clammy. He chucked his Noods in the nearest trash bin as if it was evidence. Zushi snickered at him from where he stood near Gon as the guy clasped onto Knuckle Bine's hand and reeled him in for a bro hug.
"Hey man, what's goin' on?" Knuckle said, and, as they pulled away, he gave Gon a fond pat on the cheek and sort of caressed his ear. It was weirdly intimate for two bros at a gym.
Is this another dimension? Am I dreaming? Killua thought, because not only that, but Knuckle, Hunter quarterback, was shirtless.
"Christ, your jersey doesn't do you justice," Killua said, out loud.
He slapped his hand over his mouth when both Knuckle and Gon turned to look at him. Zushi let out a startled laugh.
Knuckle took a confident step away from Gon and gestured to his defined six-pack. Killua stared at it, his mouth watering. "It's good, huh?" he said before perching his hands on his hips. He thought better of it, though, and turned with a Greek sculpture pose to show off his biceps like he was about to throw discus. "You like?"
"I thought showing off was my job," Gon whined.
Knuckle turned his back on them, flexing his biceps. The muscles in his back visibly rippled and God, Killua didn't know that was possible. He shivered and clasped his fist against his mouth as he nodded and said, "Yes, good. Very good."
"I hope you realize that all guys go to the gym just to glean compliments off of unsuspecting women," Zushi said.
"Damn straight," Knuckle said, pinning Zushi with a wink as he turned back around. He clapped Gon on the back, and Killua realized that he had been entirely too distracted by all of the exposed muscles that he hadn't realized Gon's eyes were on him. Gon startled, looking up at his teammate as Knuckle said, "You got Coach's email?"
"Yeah, meeting at seven. Got it," Gon said with a firm nod.
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"Perfect. Well, I'll leave you all to it. Nice to see you again, Zushi. Hopefully I'll see you tomorrow, huh?"
"Yes, I'll definitely be there," Zushi said. As Knuckle walked off, Killua raised an eyebrow at his lab partner. Zushi blinked at him and said, "What?"
Killua laughed and shook his head. "Nothing. Nothing at all."
As they walked down the length of mirrors, Killua found himself staring after Knuckle Bine. Killua saw photos of him all over his social media—from media coverage of the latest game to the feeds of his friends posting pictures of him being a general goofball. Knuckle had a plethora of photos—an entire portfolio, really—of pictures of him kissing the cheeks of every football player on the team.
They left the free weight room to an empty, industrial corridor where their footsteps echoed and Killua's voice amplified despite his intentions of being quiet. "There's a home game tomorrow, isn't there?"
Zushi turned around with his arms out, beaming wide. "Yup! Which means frat row is the place to be!"
Killua rolled his eyes. Truthfully, he never once set foot in a frat house. Yorknew was a massive campus in the middle of a massive city—in order to get in to a frat party, Killua would have to get his name on the party list. The only way to do that, unfortunately, would be to socialize with fraternity brothers. Girls tended to get priority on the lists, anyway, so Killua's shot at getting on any lists depended on if he made friends with people who had access to them.
"Never pegged you as a party person," he confessed, walking up beside Zushi.
"I'm not, but Knuckle invited me," he explained. "I'm sure it was a joke but then I got invited to the Facebook event so..."
"I invite you to all of the post-game parties," Gon argued, stopping in front of the locker room. He crossed his arms and raised an eyebrow at Zushi, who giggled and rubbed the back of his head. Gon pointed to Zushi and looked at Killua to say, "Usually he's at Hatsu."
"Yeah, we watch the games together and study during commercials," Killua said.
Gon blinked at him, hand lowering. "You... watch football?"
"My family's always had season tickets to the Hunters," he said. "Perks of being alumni, or whatever."
"You never finished telling me about them," Zushi said. He turned to Gon to say, "Killua got into Yorknew Law. This was news to me. Breaking news, like, two minutes before we got here."
"Looks and brains," Gon said with a grin. "So you're gonna be a lawyer or something?"
Looks AND brains.
The words echoed in Killua's head on repeat into eternity.
"Y-Yeah. I mean, fuck no. No way," Killua said in a panic, shaking his head. "My family's a bunch of cutthroat criminal justice lawyers. I passed the entrance exam just to get them to pay for my first semester and then I switched colleges."
Zushi put an arm around his shoulder and tipped their heads together. "And now we're both premed. Fascinating, right? Picture us as doctors."
"Sounds hot," Gon said. "Unfortunate I'll have to wait eight fucking years to get a checkup."
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Zushi snorted and shoved Gon into the locker room. Gon swatted him away with a goodnatured smile on his face as he swept into the room with a valiant gesture. As Gon introduced them to the men's locker room, Killua's mind imploded into a blackhole.
Somehow, Killua survived the tour. After grabbing his things from the locker, Gon took them through the three floors of the gym. The top floor supported an entire track that circled the circumference of the complex, looking over the second floor lined with machinery Killua never bothered to remember the names of. Everything come out of Gon's mouth just sounded like, "Looks AND brains. Sounds hot. Tasty."
When they rounded back to the front of the gym, Gon held up his phone where the clock ticked to six thirty in the evening. "I've got a meeting to get to, but I'll see you, Zushi, tonight. And Killua—I'll see you tomorrow bright and early."
"Yeah, sounds good," Zushi said.
Gon threw his arms out then and, as seemed to be the custom, Zushi reached out for a hug. Gon folded his arms over Zushi's narrow shoulders and rocked him back and forth for a solidly executed hug, saying, "I'll miss you dearly, my dear, sweet Zushi Roll."
"Until tonight, my love," Zushi said.
Killua put a hand to his forehead and briefly wondered if he was hallucinating, but the image of Gon turning towards him with his arms out had him reconsidering reality instead.
In a panic, Killua blurted out, "I don't hug."
Gon dropped one arm then, still extending the other. "Handshake, then."
Killua put out a hand. He didn't prepare his body for the absolute force Gon put behind the hand he slapped into Killua's palm, like he was trying to break his wrist or something. Killua's arm turned into a noodle that wobbled when Gon gave it a firm shake.
And then, Gon was off.
"Zushi Roll," Killua whispered.
"Yeah?"
"He calls you Zushi Roll. Why the hell haven't I thought of that yet?" Killua cried, throwing his arms up. "And what was with that 1940s-esque romantic drama shit I just witnessed with my own two, bleeding eyes?"
They started on their route to Hatsu Hall and, considering the fact that Zushi didn't take the turn for Ren, Killua figured studying was in their itinerary that night. Zushi shrugged, thumbs hooked under the straps of his backpack. "I don't know. What I do know is that you totally wanted to hug him, but you didn't follow through, which I just don't understand."
Killua slapped a hand on his forehead and moaned, "I panicked."
"Eh, it's probably for the better, anyway," Zushi sighed. He scuffed a foot on the brick walkway as Killua turned to look at him. "I mean, Gon's kind of a serial monogamist."
"A what?" Killua snorted.
"Serial monogamist. I don't know what else to call it," Zushi said. When Killua continued to stare, Zushi rolled his eyes and said, "I think Gon's addicted to Tinder. Since the start of the semester, he's had three semi-serious relationships and a whole host of dates—I gathered the second part after putting two and two together with you... you know... serving coffee to all of his dates."
"Classes have only been in session for three months."
"I know! So I'm just saying that... if you're looking for something steady..." Zushi started, awkwardly, grimacing as if in pain. Killua's eyebrows rose even higher as Zushi floundered with his hands and said, "Then I don't think Gon's your guy."
Killua laughed and said, "Right, well, Freecss can do whatever the hell he wants. The guy probably gets enough ass to make me concerned about testing positive, if you know what I mean."
Gon Freecss was a football player. Weren't they notorious for that sort of thing anyway? When he wrote Gon's name on receipts and stuck them to Gon's coffee cups, he supposed he thought about it. Fantasized about it, even. Killua wasn't even looking for something steady. Despite what his schedule suggested, he wasn't exactly set in stone or "dating material".
But he spent so long wondering about what the hell made Freecss so undeniably charming. Would he be able to let go if it ever came to that point?
Killua shook his head.
"On the topic of fraternity cesspools," he said, drawing Zushi's attention back, "are you really going to a frat party?"
"Yeah, I think so."
"Have you ever even been to one?"
"No. Why, do you wanna go? I bet I could get your name on the list."
"I—" Yes, he wanted to say. The last serious party he attended was at the whim of his eldest brother. He had visited for a weekend and, somehow, wound up at a house party with his brother's graduating friends. He came for a calm weekend spent in the Yorknew University library while Illumi would study and Killua would prep for exams at high school. Instead, he spent the weekend getting hammered and regretting it.
It made him hesitant to ever attend another party again.
"Maybe," he said.
"Well, I'll have Gon put your name on the list and then if you don't show, you don't show. It's no big deal," Zushi said. They walked a ways in silence before Zushi said, "But I'm serious, about you and Gon. I just don't want—"
"Yeah, I know. We've kind of had this coming anyway. We've just been romanticizing it in OChem," Killua said, more for himself than for Zushi's sake.
Just last week Zushi and Kurapika were naming Killua and Starbucks' Guy's children while Killua argued that having children was the most basic form of inhumane torture. It was a torture device as old as time and yet it kept happening.
It didn't stop Zushi and Kurapika from gushing over the name Macchiato for a girl, to which Kurapika had said, "Nickname: Macchi," which spurred Killua to say, "Sounds too Machiavellian."
Zushi smiled softly as Killua swiped his card at the Hatsu building entrance. As Killua held open the door for him, Zushi said, "Well, for what it's worth: You'll have a lot of fun working out with him."
Killua let out a dry laugh. He dragged his feet after Zushi as he said, "Uh, yeah, I'm sure you're speaking for my hormones. The rest of me is already combusting into flames just thinking about it."
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