"Mommy can we ride all the big rides?" Kookie asked as I unbuckled him.

"As long as they aren't too scary. But listen, I need you to pay close attention to me." I said, as he stood next to the car.

"Ok." He replied, his eyes serious.

"There might be a lot of people here and the last thing I want is to lose you in a big crowd. So please, baby whatever you do, you always hold my hand. If for whatever reason your hands are full, you need to stay by my side. Please do not wander off." I said in a stern tone.

"Ok, I stay with you always." He smiled, grabbing my hand. I grinned and held his hand tightly as we made our way into the crowded amusement park.

"You want some silly ears?" I asked, pointing to the headbands with bunny ears sticking out of them. He nodded and giggled as I paid for a pair and stick them on his head.

"Now I match bunny." he grinned, wrinkling his nose.

"Yes, you do match him just perfect now." I giggled, kissing the tip of his nose.

"Mommy, can we go on that one?" he asked, pointing to the ferris wheel.

"Are you sure that is not to high up for you, baby?" I asked, lacing my fingers in his. He shook his head and looked up at it excitedly. He seemed to get anxious as we got closer to the front of the line and as we boarded he clung tightly to me.

"It kinda scary now." he said as the ride started to move.

"It's ok baby, it doesn't go fast. And when the take us high up, we can see really far away, and it will be so pretty. We may even be able to see Uncle Hobi's house from here." I said, wrapping my arm around his shoulders.

"Really?" he asked, perking up a bit more and looking out into the distance. A slight grin crossed his face as we made our way higher and higher up, him pointing at random things in the distance. He was completely relaxed by the time we made our way back down to the bottom, giggling and practically pulling me off of the ride to go to the next one. We rode several more rides in a row, him always being scared at the very beginning but loosening up when he realized how fun they were. We walked along the game tents as he stopped and gasped, pointing up to the top of the prizes.

"The stuffie from my dream!" he giggled, pointing a big blue bear about half as big as he was.

"Well, let's just try to win it, shall we?" I smiled, buying us a few chances. After us both trying for proabably a good thirty minutes, we had won up to a stuffie the size below the biggest one he wanted.

"Sir, how much extra can I pay to upgrade to the big blue one?" I asked, fishing in my wallet.

"Normally we don't let people do that, but you guys have been trying so hard. Plus this guy seems like he really wants it." the man smiled, grabbing his hook.

"I do, I do! I really do!" Kookie giggled, staring at it with big eyes. He man unhooked and brought it down to Kookie's wide open arms, him squealing and hugging the stuffie close to him.

"How much do I owe you?" I asked, smiling at him.

"It's on the house. It really was only a few wins away. Plus, I have a soft spot for pure souls like him. Reminds me of my nephew." the man replied, offering a kind smile.

"Thank you so much. That is very nice of you. Kookie, what do we say to the man?" I asked, as he peeked his head around the large bear.

"Thank you! I love it forever!" he grinned, burying his face back in it. I thanked the man again before we left the tent, walking toward the picnic tables.

"Baby, how about we go sit the new stuffie in the car, cause he will get heavy carrying him around all day." I suggested.

"Mmmm ok." he mumbled, sounding kind of disappointed.

"So what are you going to name him?" I asked, as I helped lead him through the crowd.

"I think Berry!" he giggled, nuzzling his face into the bear and almost falling.

"Is it because he is a bear?" I asked, as we reached the parking lot.

"No, like a blueberry." he replied, grinning.

"Ahhh smart." I responded, laughing at his cuteness. When we reached the car, he put the bear in the back seat and buckled him in, before patting him on the head.

"We be back soon, Berry!" he said, closing the door.

"What left would you like to do, baby boy?" I asked him, giving him a kiss on the cheek.

"Mmmmm can we has a snack?" he asked, quickly followed by his stomach rumbling. I nodded and offered him my hand as we made our way back inside the amusement park. We got some ice cream and sat down at the picnic tables, enjoying the sunny afternoon.

"Mommy, I has to potty." he said quietly, looking around to make sure no one heard him.

"Baby, they only have nasty port-a-potties here, but I will stand right outside to make sure no one comes in on you, ok?" I said, standing up and offering him my hand. We made our way to the disgusting bathroom, and after some coaxing through the door, I finally got him to use the bathroom. He came out shaking his head, grunting at me.

"It so yucky!" he said, sticking his tongue out.

"Here, baby, use the hand sanitizer. Now, Mommy has to go unfortunately, so wait right here ok?" I said, giving him my hand sanitizer.

"Ick." he replied, rubbing the sanitizer in, making me giggle. I despised these toilets, but finished as quickly as possible. As I exited, I looked to my right where I left Kookie, to see no one there. I looked side to side, looking for his bright red shirt to stand out in the crowd, but couldn't seem to find him anywhere. Panic started to take over as I continued to scan the faces of everyone nearby.

"Kookie?" I called out, hoping that I would hear his voice ring out over the hum of the busy crowd. My mind instantly started to go to all the horrible things that could happen to him while he was in this big of a crowd while in heaspace.

"K-Kookie, where are you?" I called a little louder, trying to keep the panic from my voice. I fumbled for my cellphone in my pocket, trying to keep my breathing under control while I moved back and forth through the crowd.

"Hello?"

"Joon, I'm panicking." I said, trying not to let my voice break.

"Oh God, what happened?"

"I'm at the amusement park and I lost Kookie. I went to the bathroom and came out and he's gone. I don't see him anywhere, Joon. What if something horrible happens like last time?" I rambled.

"Hey, hey take a breath. Now first off, I know Hoseok and Tae were headed there earlier so maybe they can meet you wherever and help you find him. Second, just keep your cool You will find him, it will be alright. I am gonna hang up and text Hobi right now, but you keep your cool. Go to the office, see if he went there."

"O-ok Namjoon, thank you." I replied, hanging up with shaking hands. I walked as fast as I could without breaking into an all out run until I heard my phone go off.

"Hello?" I asked, biting my lip, as I stopped to scan the crowd again.

"Hey, Noona we have Kookie. Where are you?"

"Oh my God, thank you Hoseok. Thank you so much." I said, my voice trembling as I tried to keep the tears of relief in.

"We are by the teacup ride. I will wait for you here."

"Thank you, thank you, thank you." I answered, hanging up the phone quickly. I took off at a run until I could see the teacups in my sight. As I neared them, I let out a whimper as I saw Kookie sitting on a bench next to Tae, sharing some cotton candy. I rushed over and dropped on my knee in front of the bench, clutching his arms tightly as he stared at me with wide eyes.

"Goddamn it, Kookie! Where the hell did you go?" I almost shouted as I squeezed his arms in my hands.

"Mommy? I just sawed Uncle Hobi and Taetae." he said quietly, his eyes big.

"Don't you EVER run off like that again! You scared the shit out of me!! Don't you remember what happened at the mall?? What if something bad like that would have happened to you again and I wasn't here?!" I said, feeling the sorrow almost break like a dam.

"I sorry, Mommy. I not mean to." he said, sucking in his bottom lip, tears welled up in his eyes. I lowered my head and let out a sigh before sliding up on the bench and wraping my arms tightly around him.

"I was so scared. I don't want anything to ever happen to my baby boy ever again. Why did you leave?" I asked, finally letting the tears fall. He sobbed on my shoulder, clenching my shirt in his hands tightly as I rubbed his back over and over again.

"I s-s-sorryyyyyy." he wailed, as I let out another sigh.

"She really mad." I heard Tae whisper to Hoseok, making me look over at him. He was huddled into Hoseok's side, looking almost afraid of me.

"I'm sorry if I scared you Taetae. And I didn't mean to scare you either, baby. But you scared me so so much. I don't know what I would have done if you would have been hurt."I said, leaning back and wiping tears from his face still contorted in sobs.

"I'm sorry Noona. It is partially our fault. We saw him standing there and called him over. He came running and when I asked where you were, he looked around and said he didn't know. I had a feeling he lost you or something, I didn't know he was waiting for you outside the bathrooms. I didn't mean to get him in trouble or to scare you." Hoseok said, offering me a sad smile.

"It's ok. Thank you for looking out for him." I said, still trying to shake the ache from my heart.

"Mommy so mad at me!" Kookie cried, covering his face with his hands. I leaned him over onto my shoulder until he clung to me and continued to cry into my neck.

"Shhhhhhh I'm not mad anymore baby. I'm just relieved you are safe. I love you, please don't cry." I said softly into his ear, kissing his damp cheek over and over again.

"You guys go ahead and enjoy your day. We will be alright." I said, looking up at Hobi who was cuddling a pouting Tae.

"Are you sure? I still feel really bad about all this." he replied, rubbing the back of his neck.

"I promise, we are ok. You can just imagine how scared I was after what happened last time." I replied, patting Kookie's back.

"Oh, I'm sure. Ok, well I will leave you to it, but if you need anything, we are around." he replied, offering an apologetic smile again. Kookie cried for several more minutes until his sobs were reduced to sniffles.

"Why don't we go back to the car and you can snuggle with Berry on the way home, alright?" I said softly, wiping the last remnants of tears away.

"You still love me, Mommy?" he asked quietly, holding onto my now wrinkled shirt.

"Of course I love you baby! That is why I got so upset, because I love you and couldn't bear for anything bad to happen to you. It scared me so much thinking you were lost and all alone." I said softly as I coaxed him to stand up with me. He nodded and was flushed all pink as he stared at the ground, clutching my hand tightly as we made our way back to the car. I buckled him in the back seat as he clung tightly to his new bear, before falling asleep against it. I still felt an ache that hadn't left, looking fondly through the rearview mirror at my world, thankful that nothing had happened to him.

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