After that last text, I turned my phone on silent and rolled over, facing the wall, still clinging tightly to bunny. Everything smelled like him, and it only overwhelmed me and made me miss him more. I cried silently, aching for his presence. I knew how much he had to be hurting. I had already lost both of my parents so I knew how much it hurt and how lost you felt. I laid there a long time, the only way I knew that it was getting close to morning was the light in the room changing. My ears perked up when I heard the front door open and close, followed by Namjoon's voice and sniffles and whimpers. I rolled over to face the door as I heard his heavy steps make their way down the hallway. My heart ached when I saw Namjoon carrying Kookie, his legs wrapped around his waist and his arms wrapped around his neck.

"Shhhhh we are here buddy. There she is." He said softly, as Kookie's head whipped around to face me. His whimpers turned into full blown cries as he twisted his top half and reached his arms out to me as Namjoon lowered him onto the bed. He wrapped his arms around me and sobbed into me, clinging so tight it was slightly painful. I didn't care, I had my Kookie in my arms and that's all that mattered.

"He hasn't slept at all. We couldn't get him settled enough to sleep. He eventually cried so hard he made himself sick. I just brought him home after that. He needs you." Namjoon said softly. I mouthed thank you as tears started to form in my eyes again.

"No problem. I will leave you to it, but if you need anything at all, please let me know." He said softly. I nodded as he backed out of the room and left. Kookie was still crying hard, hiccuping and gasping for air.

"Shhhh, I'm here my sweet prince." I said softly.

"I throwed up." He said between hiccups as I patted his back.

"I know, I'm sorry sweetheart. Try to calm your breathing and your heart or you might get sick again." I said quietly into his ear. He still cried hard as I kissed his cheek, feeling the dampness against my lips.

"I miss you so much. Please never leave me!" He sobbed, almost becoming shrieks.

"I'm not going anywhere baby. I'm here forever and always. I promise." I said as I pulled his head back.

"My head and my heart hurted so bad." He blubbered. I took the long sleeve of my shirt and wiped away his tears and snot off of his nose as he continued to hiccup and sob. His eyes were horribly swollen and red, his face puffy. I cupped his poor tear stained cheeks in my hands and kissed him softly on the lips. I just held my lips there., feeling his lips tremble against mine as I applied the tiniest bit of pressure against them. I pulled back and searched his wet eyes as he breathed heavily.

"I wish I could just kiss it better baby boy. I wish so much, more than anything, that I could take your pain away. But I love you more than anyone or anything else in the entire world, and I am here for you." I said as I peppered gentle kisses across his face.

"You maked it better." He sniffled as he breathed heavily. I held him against me as his cries turned more into exhausted whimpers until he finally fell asleep. It wasn't long after that until I fell asleep as well, feeling complete now that I had him with me again.

***

It was afternoon by the time I woke up from a deep slumber to a sniffling Kookie shaking me slightly. I opened my eyes to see him red faced and tears brimming his eyes. I felt wet and realized what must have happened.

"Are you alright, sweetie?" I asked, as he slipped off of the bed.

"I has a accident." He sniffled, rubbing his eyes.

"That's perfectly ok. Now you just have an excuse to get in the bath with extra bubbles." I smiled, climbing off of the soiled sheets.

"You take a bath with me?" He asked, sticking out his bottom lip slightly.

"Of course, baby boy." I replied, pecking his lip. I led him to my bathroom and started the water.

"What color bath bomb, baby?" I asked getting down the basket. He picked out the bright blue one and I tossed it in. I helped him undress before undressing myself and we both climbed in the water. I squeezed some bubble bath in and pulled him close to me, resting his back against my chest.

"Do you know, I missed you so much last night that I didn't sleep at all?" I almost whispered into his ear as he let out a shuddering sigh.

"I not sleep either. I try to sleep with Uncle Joonie and Jin but I can't. I miss you too much." He said quietly.

"Well don't worry. We are just going to cuddle all day." I replied, kissing his cheek. We finished our leisurely bath and I managed to get him to eat some soup while I put the dirty clothes and bedding in the laundry. After, we went upstairs and cuddled our bed with cartoons going in the background.

"I sorry I say something bad. I say I not want you...." he started, whimpering after a while.

"Baby, you were hurting and sad and angry. I understand." I replied in quiet voice to try to keep him from crying again.

"I so sorry Mommy. I want you always!" He whimpered.

"Don't get upset, my sweet boy. We all can say things that we don't mean when we feel very hurt sometimes. And you had special reason to feel that way. Don't worry about it, baby boy." I replied, squeezing him. He rolled over away from me toward the edge of the bed and opened the nightstand drawer.

"What you doing, baby?" I asked, leaning up a little bit to look at him.

"I gotted you something." He replied, rolling back over to me. He placed a small velvet box in my hand, making me swallow hard and my heart hammering in my ears.

"What is this?" I asked as I started to open it.

"One day when I was big, I gotted you that. I gonna show you I want you be with me forever." He said softly as I stared at him with wide eyes. Inside the box was very obviously an engagement ring.

"K-kookie...I will always be with you, but are you sure that's what you wanted to say?" I asked, my stomach doing somersaults.

"Yeah, I apposed to say a lot of stuff but I forgetted it all." He replied, giving me a small smile.

"That's ok, baby. I will be with your forever but I need to make sure to talk to you when you are big too." I said, putting a hand on his cheek. We laid there like that for a minute and I closed the lid of the ring box. He looked at me and his eyes got watery, his chin quivering.

"What's wrong?" I asked feeling that familiar ache in my heart.

"You no like it?" He asked, his voice sounding so dejected.

"No, baby I love it! It's so beautiful, and I can't wait to wear it." I said opening the box and slipping the ring onto my finger, anything to keep him happy.

"Jinnie said the ring he weared means he gonna marry his daddy. That mean I gonna get to marry you?" He asked, his teary eyes looking bright and hopeful.

"If you want to marry me baby boy, then yes it does." I replied leaning forward and placing a soft kiss on his lips.

"Good cause I wants to marry you." He replied, snuggling up next to me. Holy shit, did I really just get engaged to Kookie? I sure hope Jungkook remembered the next time he came out of headspace.

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