《Najlepsze teksty, cytaty, rozmowy》15
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Policjant zatrzymuje samochód, którym jadą trzy osoby.
- Gratuluję - mówi policjant - jest pan tysięcznym kierowcą, który przejechał nową szosą.
Oto nagroda pieniężna od firmy budującej drogi!
Obok pojawia się reporter i pyta:
- Na co wyda pan te pieniądze?
- No cóż - odpowiada po namyśle kierowca - chyba w końcu zrobię prawo jazdy...
Żona kierowcy z przerażeniem:
- Nie słuchajcie go panowie... On zawsze lubi żartować, gdy za dużo wypije!
W tym momencie z drzemki budzi się, siedzący z tylu dziadek i widząc policjanta zauważa:
- A nie mówiłem, że skradzionym samochodem daleko nie zajedziemy!...
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- In Serial188 Chapters
Auntie toasts the VRMMORPG
~~ On Hiatus ~~ After Flora Fluss burns down the kitchen, her son insists she is too old to live alone. She's got two choices. Either move into a retirement home or spend the rest of her life within a virtual reality game governed by society's most advanced artificial intelligence. When you've worked a lifetime as an engineer for home appliances, naturally, you go with the option that has more toasters. Soon, Flora finds out that the virtual world is more familiar than she thought. Though, it takes her a while to get used to the idea that tanks don't hold water or oil but the aggro of mobs. Auntie toasts the VRMMORPG contains cute crafting, complicated game-mechanics plus how to exploit them, unconventional training methods, and a lot of toasters. New chapters: Mondays and Thursdays. For additional information, companion vids and pictures, please check out my Patreon posts with the tag #attv. Companion videos on YouTube are in the playlist Auntie toasts the VRMMORPG You want to get notified on Twitter or Facebook when I upload a new chapter? No problemo! Discord: https://discord.gg/hX8gWPE
8 130 - In Serial9 Chapters
A-Live AI
The year is 2247. For almost two hundred years Sentient AI research has been banned. Everyone knew this, and yet no one has ever given up on finding the perfect setup for it. Restricted AI are rare, but possible to get ahold of if you have the money and the clout to get through the law for it. Especially when it deals with the military. Alfred Homis is an engineer and has spent the last three years working for the United Terran Military's Research and Exploration Department. Specifically to help build a 'shackled' AI who's prime directive was to explore potentially habitable worlds. Worlds that are far cheaper to colonize and add to the United Terran Directorate's fold than terraforming. During the AI's maiden voyage things go horribly wrong, taking Alfred Homis along for the ride. Thrown into a parallel universe where the laws of physics are just a little messed up, Alfred finds himself trapped inside the very machine he'd helped to build. Add magic, hostile fantasy creatures, and two different pantheons of 'Gods' to the mix and things get even more complicated. Oh, and an invasion between universes to boot. But that's just all in a days work though for Alfred, the AI Lord. Authors Note: Hi guys! Long time no see. And yes, I know that's all on me. But I blame life for that. Anyway, this is my new work, and I hope you guys enjoy it! The chapters are a little shorter than I'd previously posted in my other stories, but I cannot say that I have the same amount of time or energy to write them like that anymore. Sorry about that. Still, some warnings: There is cursing in this story. I am not going to edit it out. There will be sexual content later. Blood, gore and cruel depictions are all planned. If that isn't your thing, I'd suggest you turn back now. There is also my dry, and often not-so-funny sense of humor. And oh, it's all in first person gain. Haha. I just tend to write better that way. If none of that bothers you, then enjoy the read! Feel free to comment, point out mistakes, or make suggestions! Reviews are nice too, but please lay off the criticism until the story gets good and going. Thank you. Note 1: Some edits to the synopsis.
8 73 - In Serial6 Chapters
Rise and Fall
600 years ago the world fell, when the monoths began to rise out of the earth and with it monsters out of mythology started spawning.
8 155 - In Serial6 Chapters
The Abnormal Existence Called The Creator
A new being called The Creator awakens from a long slumber confused and afraid not knowing what or who he was he quickly found out that he had the power to create different beings and objects bored at the void he was resting in he decided that he would use his power to create an interesting and wonderful world one that would entertain him into the end of time, the strong would rise and calm power while the weak would perish and be forgotten thus begins The Age of Birth And Freedom.
8 75 - In Serial20 Chapters
The Princess And Her Warmonger
"Let me tell you a true story about a mouse and a Warmonger, and the unlikely relationship that sprouted between them in the time of endless war." Nostalisk is a world in endless constant war. The Factions of this world endlessly fight for power, this fighting called the Great Wars, a war that has been alive for over four million years. Currently, one of the largest Factions has withdrawn from the endless fighting. This Faction, known as the Kingdom, hopes to forget their past of endless bloodshed and how they were almost destroyed because of it. In the Kingdom, Princess Isalene, the only princess of the Kingdom, is stuck choosing a new personal guard after her previous one died. Despite her father, King Robert, helping her choose a new guard, Isalene decides to head to the arena to see how the knights on the list her father gave her act outside of the eyes of royals. When she arrives at the arena, she sees a knight fighting that is not on the list her father gave her. Named Cruel Knight, this knight is a vicious knight with confusing morals. Despite hating violence, Princess Isalene can't help but be drawn to the knight and their graceful yet cruel fighting style and strange weapons. Princess Isalene continues to watch them and soon learns that Cruel Knight is a Warmonger named Sharia, and is female at that, meaning she is a prisoner. She isn't in there for something simple as disobeying a direct order or killing a noble, but for prolonging a war. Despite knowing this, Princess Isalene can't stop thinking about the Warmonger and suddenly gets a "smart" idea. She'll make Sharia her new personal guard to find out more about her! What could go wrong? And so begins the odd relationship between Sharia The Warmonger and Princess Isalene. One is a peace-loving sheltered naive princess who hates violence and the other is a vicious, cold, twisted, and cruel Warmonger who hates the kind of peace Isalene and the current Kingdom loves. Polar opposites. Yet, even the Warmonger can't help but grow a strange liking to her new "annoyance". But, can the two really get along? After all, Sharia's whole mindset sees Isalene as a waste, and it seems that everyone Isalene talks to tells her to fire Sharia before something terrible happens. But, then again, during this time of budding danger, this odd couple may be what the Kingdom needs. After all, when a large faction such as the Kingdom starts growing soft and weak, they become a rather irresistible target. [After thinking on it, I decided to start a re-write of The Princess And Her Warmonger, adding more details, fixing the switching POVs somewhat, and fixing some of the issues with the story. Don't worry, all of the chapters are still here, I am just making new ones and replacing the old chapters one at a time] (This story can also be found on Scribble Hub and Webnovel) [Cover art is not mine]
8 100 - In Serial29 Chapters
Second Wind, legend of Pandemonium (Finished/Incomplete)
The developers of the worlds leading VRMMORPG Edge Online have decided to shut down its servers after over a decade. Shugireth Darkstar, the leader of Pandemonium, Edge Online's top guild, suffers from a deadly disease and his end is near. He hasn't left his VR pod for 5 years, as the medical nanodroids at the hospital takes care of him. Without Edge, he will die, because his physical body has already been all but destroyed by the sickness. Seeing no light at the end of the tunnel, Shugireth Darkstar, the Master of Pandemonium, stubbornly stays behind as the servers shut down... If that was all, we could end this story right here. However, that was only the beginning of the legend of pandemonium. The prelude to the movement, if you will. Shall we see what happens next? -------------- Some notes from Me (The author, gasp surprise): I first wrote this (100k) as an experiment. I saw the advice about having foils for overpowered MCs, and I watched quite a few lectures on writing. I wanted to test things out for myself and see if I could carry a story through other ways than only relying on physical conflict like some thrillers do. Thus this might lean a bit towards slice of life with a romance subplot, but I don't want to give my story away so read it if u want to know more. This was basically never intended for anyone else's eyes but my own, and written to explore writing as a process. This wasn't my attempt at writing a good book, but it turned into something that I think might interest some people, so I decided to pop it up here. It is slightly old so my style and writing skills have advanced considerably since I first started this thing. Having said that, I think it's pretty readable, but I am very interested in how other people will receive this. Please feel free to criticize it and just in general shoot me some feedback on what you think. It contains light Litrpg elements, not heavy table spam, it's just the basis of the world. Although I like that sort of thing, this was written before I even knew of Royalroad and hadn't considered litrpg much. Some of you may recognize that it was slightly inspired by Overlord. Also, the Tags for sexual content and traumatizing content are there as a precaution on all of my stories pretty much, even if my story does not contain any of that at the moment. I can't really know what the future will bring, but in the case of this story I do know a little bit, since I wrote 100k words before posting it here. And I just posted it on a whim because I figured some readers on Royalroad might enjoy this story.
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