The week went by in a blur. It was Friday night. Draco was laying in my bed, staring at the ceiling. I was next to him.

"Are you okay?" I asked worriedly as I saw a sorrowful look on his face as he glanced at the ceiling.

"Fine."

"What's wrong?"

"I've never felt this way before. It's your fault."

"What did I do?"

"You were born, you became my friend, and now I'm obsessed with you," he listed.

"Seems like a you problem."

He smacked me lightly in the stomach with the back of his hand and we laughed.

"I've changed my mind," I said, breaking the silence lingering between us.

"About what?"

"I want to go to the Muggle world — just to visit, of course, but there are things I want to see after we graduate."

"I'll take you wherever you want but tell me what you want to do first."

"I want to stand out of the sunroof in a Muggle car and drive down the street with music blasting. I want to run along a beach with my dog and splash around with my feet in the ocean. And I want you to come with me."

"As long as you take me to a Justin Bieber concert than I'll take you anywhere."

"You're never going to let the little first year live that down are you?"

"Never."

I laughed again and we both sat in a comfortable silence, our brains compacted with separate thoughts.

"I'm not ready," I whispered while feeling a weight being lifted dramatically off of my shoulders for expressing what I had wanted to say for the past week.

I heard him swallow hard, as if he was downing a bottle of pills all at once.

"Not ready for what exactly?"

"For literally anything; to grow up, to get with you, to move on."

He sucked in a sharp breath, this time, as if he had been stabbed multiple times in the center of his heart.

"It's not that I don't like you at all because I definitely do! It's just — well — I'm still upset over George and I don't think we should've kissed."

"I thought that was what you wanted."

"I did too, at the time. However, after he asked for a second chance you don't understand how bad I wanted to jump into his arms and forget that anything bad ever happened between us."

"What about me?"

"I like you a lot. I honestly like you so much that I hate to even have to bring this up but I don't want to keep secrets! It's simply that I don't want to start something when other things need to be finished."

"I get it, I really do." He sighed while standing up.

"Where are you going?"

"I need time."

"Malfoy, please don't go. I want to continue hanging out with you but I have to find closure with George before I think about even holding hands with you. I'm doing this so I don't hurt you in the end. Please understand," I pleaded.

"I understand. Let me know when you're ready because I've been sitting here waiting for you and I'll keep doing it."

I smiled at his understanding response. "You'll be the first to know."

He leaned over from his standing position, gave me a quick peck on the cheek and walked out of my dorm to clear his head. I blushed as he closed the door behind him.

I then slammed my pillow into my face and screamed as loudly as I could to release the built up tension, sadness, and guilt.

I wish I was over George but I can't just stop liking him even if I really want to stop the feelings. I like Draco a lot too but I don't want to hurt him if I do still like George at all. Do I even like George? Am I filling a void with Draco? What do I do?

I was left alone in the night feeling awful and hopeless for any future relationships.

I began feeling quite risky. I jumped out of bed and sprinted to the Gryffindor common room. I whispered the password all while getting nasty words spat at me by the portrait. I ran into the boys dormitory to open the door. I shook the two boys awake and they groggily opened their eyes.

"What are you doing here?" Ron asked, visibly annoyed.

"Follow me," I whispered while Harry rubbed his eyes and obeyed.

I led them out into the Gryffindor common room and sat on the one person love seat as they curled up on the couch next to one another.

"Are you alright?" Harry questioned while covering up his pajamas out of pure embarrassment.

"I'm fine. Also, I don't care about your pants.

He shifted uncomfortably and I began speaking again before Ron could complain about the time, as it was pretty late.

"Do you guys have any idea what made George want me back?"

"You've got to take a look into a guys perspective," Harry advised. "Guys feel the need to make the girl jealous immediately after they break up but it honestly isn't worth it. After weeks or even months, they see that the girl has moved on and they get jealous and they realize how good they had it. It usually doesn't work out too well for them though because the girl is already over him and he is now pining after them."

I nodded and heard footsteps coming down from the girls dormitory.

"Hermione?" I asked.

She nodded and sat on the ledge of the one person chair next to me.

"What are you guys doing awake?" she asked while stretching her arms and leaning her head against my shoulder sleepily.

"We were discussing my love life," I whispered to which she propped up her head and began awakening.

"What's new?"

"Nothing much other than George saying he wants me back," I cooly spoke.

"He didn't!" She gasped in horror and covered her mouth.

"He did, however I denied it and here we are."

"Sorry about that," Ron mumbled.

"It's fine. Enough about me though, what have you three been up to?"

"Nothing much. Just being cautious about Sirius Black and busy practicing Quidditch," Harry said. "How are you?"

"I've been pretty good."

"We are going to sleep," Ron groaned while dragging his friends arms and leading them to the staircase.

"Night," I muttered, clearly annoyed by Ron's actions.

I walked back to the Slytherin common room to sit and stare into the fire. The door creaked opened and a certain blonde boy came and plopped down next to me.

"If you didn't know, I'm not mad at you for needing time to heal. I'm always going to be here for you," Draco said while turning to face me.

"Thanks."

"Where'd you get the scar, L/n?"

"It's nothing."

"It's definitely something."

"I got it after my sister passed, okay?"

"Who gave it to you?" His hands were balled into a fist and his face was filled with curiosity and anger.

"It was my dad," I whispered.

He unraveled his hands from the fist and gave me a hug from the side. I hugged him back and buried my face into his chest while listening to his heart beat rapidly.

"Still get nervous around me?" I whispered in his chest with a muffled voice.

He ignored me. "What'd he do?"

I knew Draco was referring to how I got the scar and what my dad did to mark me. However, as much as I wanted to avoid it at all costs, I said to him earlier, no more secrets — I was obligated to tell him.

"After Eleanor — you know — he got very angry with me and didn't speak a word to me for some time. I was downstairs one day, grabbing a glass of water and he was sitting on the couch. Once I walked passed him he pushed me onto the coffee table and I scraped my neck which caused this scar that won't go away. It's my fault because I picked the scab. It reminded me of her and I wanted it gone so I scraped at my skin for hours until my neck was a bloody mess. I sprinted to my room after the occurrence, never to happen again."

He began tracing circles on my shoulder with his ring-filled fingers. They tingled against my skin but I let him continue, as it made him happy.

"I could make your neck a bloody mess," he whispered alluringly.

"There goes the old Malfoy."

"He never left — simply just became comforting when a friend needed."

I giggled. "Soft Malfoy."

He dug his fingers into my shoulder and they progressed up on my neck. They walked all the way up and grazed my soft jawline.

"Harder than a rock."

"I see," I whispered while grinning widely and tearing away from his chest.

He shook his head and lured me back into his chest with a simple pointer finger gesture.

He wrapped his arms around me and I could feel his chin resting on my head. Therefore, I was as still as a statue.

My mind was a boat. Drifting off into the unknown sea and taking me away without much direction.

What are we? I so desperately wanted to ask. I refrained. Due to the hurt I caused him earlier and not being completely over George, I just stopped.

"What are you and George?" Draco asked while his breath staggered, as if he was nervous to ask.

"Nothing. Friends? A guy who likes a girl who wants him terribly but knows it's a bad idea."

"Does that make me a guy who wants a girl whose ex guy likes her and she wants him tremendously but refrains because she likes someone else?"

"Maybe?" I laughed at his confusing, yet creative, explanation.

"Have you ever told anyone about the scar?"

"Merlin, no."

"So why'd you tell me? If you were so skeptical to tell others, not even Blaise I presume."

"The same reason you told me about your fathers behavior. The same reason you gave me that rose and told me the backstory as well. The same reason you told me about your fear of thunderstorms even if you think it is childish. We don't judge one another, we solely care for one another, and we feel comfortable in each other's presence." I whispered the last part, feeling his chin move off of my head.

"Blaise knows."

"What?" I asked frantically.

"Not about the scar. About us."

"How can he know about us when I don't even know about us? Was it just an assumption?"

"That night, when Blaise comforted you and then I walked in, he told me afterward that it was obvious in my face that something happened between us. I, of course, shot down his so-called assumption but he pursued his idea."

"Blaise doesn't tell me anything anymore!" I groaned while wanting to get information about Draco's feelings second-handedly.

"Let's make a handshake," Draco said while standing up, pushing me out of his lap all the while.

I nodded and we proceeded to create an epic handshake. It took an hour — or two — but we finally finished.

It was time for our last performance of the handshake.

[There should be a GIF or video here. Update the app now to see it.]

We giggled and stood close to each other, breathing somewhat heavy.

"How'd you come up with these moves?" Draco asked while chuckling abundantly.

"Muggles."

"How about we do this handshake every time before a quidditch game. You are going to start coming to them."

"Okay."

"Okay? You're not going to fight me on that?" he shockingly asked.

"No, I'd like to watch you lose. I suppose it would be my loss too but you'll be responsible for it."

He rolled his eyes playfully and I looked up at him. He glanced at my lips and I spun around to face the fire and to unsubtly avoid his gaze.

I clasped my hands behind my back and I felt him graze them. I was under the impression that he was gripping my hands, but he slid passed them and grabbed my waist while pushing me backwards and closer to his chest.

"Softy," I whispered once more, so hushed due to the crackling fire, I'm surprised he heard.

"Only for you," he whispered in my ear which caused my body to shiver; few people have that effect on me.

"He likes me," I jokingly announced to no one in particular.

"I like our friendship, especially when we kiss."

"Once," I reminded him. "The first didn't count."

"Best minute of my life."

"You've got to stop acting like we are a couple or something. I'm not ready yet."

"I've waited thirteen years; I can wait a little longer."

I sighed and pushed away from his grip.

"Want to whip out dancer Malfoy?"

"I'd be honored," he whispered while taking two hands to my waist.

I whipped my wand in the direction of the hidden radio in the corner of the room and soft music began playing.

"Improper form," I said while wrapping my two arms around his neck.

For a few minutes we swayed back and forth in the dark common room, his face orange from the fire. Our feet synchronously moved with each other as we rocked back and forth. He looked down at me with such admirability that you would've thought he was in love.

"Don't look at me like that," I spoke, quietly and shyly.

"You're the prettiest girl in the room."

I unraveled my hands from his neck and pushed him jokingly in the chest.

"Only kidding," he assured.

"Way to boost my confidence."

"Being in my presence should boost your confidence."

I rolled my eyes at him and had a seat on the couch. He stayed standing near the fire with his lands sticking out to warm up.

"Independent Malfoy," I whispered, although loud enough for him to hear me.

He turned around to face me and then slowly walked over. He gripped my wrists, pulled me up, wrapped me in a tight hug and then laid on his back, sprawled across the couch, with me falling on top of him.

He smirked. "I'll show you independence."

"Can I use the 'I'm not ready' excuse right now?"

"Only if you truly want. Otherwise, I'm going to kiss you."

"I'm almost ready."

"We'll see how you feel next week."

I grinned and hopped off him while sprinting up the stairs. I heard him follow after me and I hid behind the door as he slowly creeped in.

He walked out into view and completely failed to see me from behind the door.

I popped out from behind him and he wasn't fazed whatsoever. He raised his eyebrows at me while I backed away, inching closer to my bed.

"You're lucky that I like you or you'd be pinned to the wall at this moment."

"Who said that's lucky?" I said while a playful grin spread across my face.

"This is why I like you."

I giggled and stayed frozen in my place as he slowly stepped closer to me.

As each foot of his moved in front of one another, my breath stopped.

"Don't even ask if I'm flustered because you clearly see the answer to that," I croaked out before he could make a witty comment.

"I can't wait until your over George," he whispered.

"Me too."

He stopped in his tracks as the words spilt from the tip of my tongue.

"I mean — uh — to keep you — as a — friend."

"Huh?"

"Not to — make up or out — I mean — er — you know."

He bit his lip at me and I pursed my lips while letting out a sharp breath.

"I know exactly what you mean."

"I'm going to go get ready for bed. Get yourself settled in."

I then rushed into the bathroom and lightly closed the door behind me. I continued to collect myself from stumbling on my words and then I brushed my teeth. Once I finished, I changed and then walked out to see Draco in his boxers, opening my dresser to snoop around.

"What's this?" He asked.

"A diary."

"Can I read it?"

"No."

"Okay," he said while opening the diary and hopping into my bed.

I ran after him and tried to snatch it from him but he extended his arm out of reach and I gave up while my face began growing immensely red. I laid back and listened to the diary being read aloud by Draco.

——————————————————

October 12, 1991

Dear Diary,

I've spontaneously started this diary to keep my thoughts together. It's October and first year is already amazing. We've started brewing in potions and I have to admit it is loads of fun, besides Snape pestering us all the time. Blaise is my best friend as of now and I can't wait to make more.

Much love, Y/n

————————————————————

"How cute," Draco said while flipping to the next journal entry.

——————————————————

December 24, 1991

Dear Diary,

Happy Christmas Eve! This year has been bloody brilliant. Except, of course, for the one and only Draco Malfoy being a bully. I don't let it get to me though, he's not worth it. At least, that's what Blaise says. He bullies us both if you didn't catch that. However, I'm sure when you're rereading this you'll be smarter than you are now. Hopefully, at Transfiguration — I'm awful. Hoping to stay with Blaise this Christmas! Trying to distract myself from Eleanors birthday.

Much love, Y/n

——————————————————

"Enough," I demanded.

"I remember 'bullying' you."

"You still do."

"One more."

The page flipped and my heart raced rapidly.

——————————————————

April 2, 1992

Dear Diary,

Happy Spring. Actually, not very happy. I like this guy named Neville Longbottom. He's super cute and a Gryffindor; Blaise wouldn't approve. I don't think I'll make a move or anything. I mean I'm only eleven and I'm not looking for anything. So long, Longbottom. Future me, do you still like him?

Much love, Y/n

————————————————————

"Stop."

"You liked Neville? First year Neville?"

"Don't be mean."

"I'm never mean."

"Stop, Malfoy."

He set the diary down and turned to me.

"How things have changed."

"Bully to friends," I said nonchalantly.

"More than friends," he corrected.

"Not exactly."

He looked at me as if he knew something I didn't. He thinks he's going to simply swift me off my feet — he has — although it's more complicated. George is still in my heart and I want to let go, I just need a push or a pep talk.

"It's not a bad thing to admit your feelings for me," he said while smirking.

"It's not a bad thing to keep your mouth shut at certain times."

He scoffed and I turned to sleep.

"If my mouth wasn't running all the time, I wouldn't be me."

I glanced over my shoulder and he turned to sleep the other way.

I pondered his words.

If he shut up I wouldn't be attracted to him? Am I even attracted to him now, when he doesn't shut up?

I rid my mind of the thoughts and went to sleep.