"My biological brother?" My voice became louder than I had anticipated. I had a brother, not Joe but another one who was of my own flesh and blood, how can I only just be finding out about this now?

Jim came back in and seemed pleased with himself until I turned to him, his expression soon changed from pleased to concerned. "What's happened?" I walked towards him and gripped his hand, he knew exactly how I felt, scared.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I tried to calm down but it wasn't working, my voice only becoming louder but weaker, I felt as if my brain wasn't able to intake this new information, all the lies and facts about my family, the parents who died; was that a lie too?

My mum got up and tried to walk towards me but I backed away sharply, Jim still held onto me but attempted to nudge me closer into the room, rather than lurking in the doorway. "We didn't tell you because when we found out you were ill. Things seemed serious and we didn't want to risk making you worse." She remained in a hushed tone but I scoffed, never before have I addressed her in this way, but that was a low call.

"You can't blame this on me being ill, I'm fine now! See, not loopy like you thought when I was little. Why didn't you tell me sooner? I could've handled it." My mum looked concerned once I finished, I had convinced myself a while ago that I was no longer to act like a victim, that only I could fix me and no doctor or my parents could say otherwise. If she told me it wouldn't have sent me into a spiral of denial, but what if I never met him or if I met Peter earlier, would I have gone my whole life not knowing I had a brother that wasn't Joe?

Jim let go of me and walked out of the room, he knew about my past and when I was younger, although part of me still doesn't understand what is wrong with me, I like to think I can act like I'm fine, and everyone else seems to think so, par Jim.

I turn to my mum who looks very upset and sits back down in a chair, part of me feels sorry for her to tell me this but the other part wants to badger her with questions about my life, what and who I really am. We both sit in silence as the questions circle my mind, are my parents alive? Did my brother know who I was and why not mention it to me.

Then it clicked, I pulled out a business card from within my pocket, I folded it up and opened it again, trying to preoccupy my mind with clouds preventing the thunder storm. My mum looked to me and the to what I held inbetween my finger, could now be a good time to tell her about the Alfie thing, the actual reason for why I am here tonight?

Seeing the name 'Peter Mitchell' just seemed so alien to me, that this name and number could provide tie up any loose ends I've been left with all my life. He looked like me, his face seemed familiar like I should've known who he was and my brain was screaming at me and he seemed to know, yet I was too abrupt and defensive to even give him a chance. Would I be stood here with Jim if I let Peter speak, or would he be stood by my side?

Deciding that trying to figure all this out isn't worth it for one night I decide to go back to my bedroom upstairs. Without saying a single word I fiddle with the business card in my fingers and head up the stairs, my mum doesn't try to stop me or even make an attempt to move or speak, Jim is already up the stairs but I feel drained. Drained to even tell him how I feel as I don't know myself, I feel so unsure on everything lately, my life, feelings, mentality everything.

Walking through my door all my old belongings greet me, old photos and fairy lights I stuck to my baby pink walls, the bad art work I tried to produce when I was 10, my bed with fresh bedding and the sweet smell of flowers greets me with open arms. Placing myself onto my bed I bring my legs to cross them, still twirling the number inbetween my fingers contemplating whether or not to do something about this, give Peter a ring or if I should leave all of this mystery alone.

I placed the business card in my draw next to my bed and found some fresh pyjamas, since the ones I had been wearing were scarred with horrifying memories of Alfie's demonic state, something I don't want lingering via my pyjamas. Finding something else to wear I quickly change and climb into bed, not fully satisfied but tired enough to know I need to put away all of my thoughts for one night, place them into my draw and reevaluate them in the morning, when hopefully more things make sense.

* next morning *

After hours of lying awake, staring at my ceiling hoping to come up with a logical and reasonable explanation to all of this my brain could not fathom any reasonings for all of this, not even a simple sentence. Now I have to go down and face my family, my mum an potentially my dad, they will have a lot to tell me, whether they tell me the full truth or not, all I want is as much information on who I am as they are willing to give, I'll fill in the blanks so to speak if that's what it comes to.

Getting out of bed and walking straight out the door I immediately feel a heavier weight placed upon my shoulders, my care free irresponsible attitude I could have in my room where I can be alone has gone, and has been replaced by the perils of secrecy.

Walking down the stairs slowly so my parents don't stop their conversation I listen in carefully. "Do we bring him in? What about if he wants to be close?" I hear my mum question herself, she can sometimes work herself up for no reason, I know I can do the same.

"If he wants to be apart of her life then we can do nothing about that, he deserves to know her I mean they are siblings after all." I heard my dad and immediately I felt a shiver pass through me, they were on about Peter, could he help explain this? If so, I must ask him.

Trailing back up the stairs to my room I grab my phone and his business card and quickly dial the number, hoping that he'll answer sooner rather than later. I hear a knock on the door and throw my phone behind my pillow, being greeted by a Jim, who tries to seem like he is happy but I know him, he is trying to be positive for my own sake.

"Jim cut the crap, I'm miserable too, you don't have to act like you feel okay." I walk towards my door way, hoping he wouldn't linger for long considering Peter could pick up at any given moment.

"Oh Ali. It's just you seem so broken right now, that you're trying to glue yourself back together but causing more damage to yourself in the process. Be honest with me, how do you feel?" He looked me straight in the eyes, this meant the ending wouldn't be good, I found it difficult to lie to Jim when he looked me dead in the eyes, as if they searched for any lies I was going to tell to fool him.

"I'm getting there, but there's something I need to do so I'll speak to you later." I told him ushering him away and shut my door, ensuring he would get the message as I rushed back to my bed where my phone remained on a phone call with Peter.

"Peter?" I asked, unsure on how I said his name, this guy is my brother yet I address him as if he were a distant colleague I barely spoke to, yet part of me felt if I were too friendly it could freak him out.

"Is this Alison? Ali sorry." He corrected himself far too quickly, as if he was reading my name, talking to a piece of paper rather than his blood sibling.

"Yeah it is, hi." I stumbled for my words, how do I break it to him? "I'm now aware of who you are and who you think I am, is there any chance we could meet up today?" I remained confused with my tone, mostly questionable and hoping he understood fully what I meant.

There was a momental silence on the other end, which made me more anxious than before. "I would love to Ali, say 12 at the Rilohs Cafe?" He sounded more friendly, as if he were talking to someone he had known his whole life.

"Sounds good to me, I'll meet you then." I smiled to myself, pleased that I now have the opportunity to have a conversation about my family, my real family who I never knew, maybe this was meant to happen this way. The world works in mysterious ways I guess.

Quickly getting changed and doing some light makeup I grab my things and see its 11, I open my door to go and brush my teeth when I'm met by Jim, who has his arms crossed in front of his chest and looks frustrated.

"You've got a lot of explaining to do."