Bullying.

Have I experienced it? Yes and I still am unfortunately, or I wouldn’t be here. Bear with my story please, its long.

Where and who? At first. It began when I started high school. At primary school I was the girl who could fit in. I was friends with both girls and boys. I could giggle over the cute actors on Disney and yet play sports. But high school. It became the place where I couldn’t fit in. Everybody seemed to be finding themselves. Everybody except me.

The first year I tried to be friends but I became the loner instead. The weird tomboy who still wore pigtails and carried her lunch in her little lunch kit. I was slightly chubby due to hormonal problems and had a limp due to an accident when I was smaller. I was teased mercilessly. But however I was naïve, and it never bothered me too much.

The second year I started to become self-conscious. I hated walking from classes due to my limp. My uniform never fitted right. The boys avoided me like the plague and the girls talked about me behind my back. I tried to talk to my parents but they never understand. I tried to talk to my guidance councillor at the time but she told me point blank to my face that I was just another spoiled girl who wanted attention. I’m serious.

The third year I started to fade into the back ground. There was a new transfer students who was disgusting (no lie) and she became the new punching bag. I still thank god for her though. She took the pressure off me. I slowly started getting confident. I now had a best friend in the other class and finally got a boyfriend. I made my group of friends. They were gamers, who like me had their own story to tell. I was happy. I fitted. Until the ultimate cliché hit me. During the period before summer break, there was a death in my family. It was an all hands on deck situation and everybody was needed to plan the funeral (my family is huge and is widespread). Usually I would walk from school to the bus terminal with the boyfriend and the best friend since it was the same direction we were all heading but every day during that period I had to rush from school to my parents waiting car to go wherever we were going.

On the last day of school before summer break, a girl who I knew but wasn’t really friends with came to me, telling me that she say the boyfriend and the girl friend smooching it up and showed me the picture to prove it. I was distraught. The two persons who I trusted had betrayed me. I immediately texted both to tell them it was over and deleted the numbers. Thus began my descent once again however this time, my heart was cold.

The fourth year was eventful, lemme tell you that. Mother Nature felt sorry for me and allowed me to lose some weight and my limp was almost gone. The ex-best friend and the boyfriend started dating (told you it was the ultimate cliché). The ex-best friend also showed me how much of a bitch she was by trying to spread rumours about me. Thankfully nobody believed them. She also tried to threaten me however that didn’t work out. Remember my group of friends? They’re my family now. They hated her as much as I did (my group of friends were all boys and she dated all of them) and they protected me. One good thing came out of it though. I grew a back bone. I sent her threats of my own which I proved I could back up. My cousin (who has a wattpad and introduced me to it) became my best friend as she was as crazy as me (unfortunately she was also friend with ex best friend- life sucks huh?)

The fifth year finally came. Hallelujah! It was graduation time and also final exams. The bullying died down due to cram time. Also remember ex-boyfriend? He became bae. He broke up with ex best friend after two months and we reconciled. Ex best friend was obviously pissed but who gave a fuck. Long story short I passes all my exams with flying colours. I decided to study further at a school closer to home which means that boyfriend and I were apart but I trust him now plus (I would seriously hurt him if he tried anything funny again anyways).

Side note: ex best friend and I are still a war. She got her newest bf at the school that I am currently at and tries to spoil my social status but she’s more like an annoying fly. Plus everybody knows her current status *whore* I’m sorry I know it’s wrong to say it but it’s true. My bullying now comes from my parents who call me worthless and a disgrace due to my less than stellar grades but one learns to ignore it (sad isn’t it?)

Finally, reader, all I want to say is find yourself and be true to yourself. I shared my story to get it off my chest and damn it feels good to tell it. Don’t let anyone try to change who you are. Don’t let people influence you. Because at the end of the day, when we all grow up, we will look back and shake our heads at the yesteryear. Take it from me, an 18 year old who tried and is still trying to grow up :)