Okay, here it goes

I guess my bullying started from ever since I was born. My mom cheated on my stepdad with my stepdad's nephew (my dad).

As such I was never supposed to be born. And all my family members and their friends hate me. They make me drink alchohol, do drugs and make me have -you know what- with the family friends or at times complete strangers, basically they have made me a prostitute. And I have this neighbor who harasses me too. They didn't care for me at all.

When I started school, I accidentally joined the wrong group of friends. As I was young, stupid and senseless, I couldn't even guess it out that I had become a bully. It had been too late when I finally realized. But still I left the group, but I guess karma will never leave me alone.

Now I've become the victim of bullying.

At school, all my classmates were intophysically bullying me, calling me names, harassing me completely. Sometimeseven teachers and seniors from my school bully me a lot. I've tried complaining to the principal, but no one even cared.

And finally when I reach home , my parents make me a drunkard, a drug addict, a whore. They never even bothered helping me out with anything.

My best friend tried to help me, but instead ofhelping me, she herself got Ill-treated by my stepdad. It's my fault she had togo through that. I can't even contact her now and my boyfriend wants to breakupwith me because of all of this.

And all of my so called 'friends' doesn't give a damn of what is happening to me. For them I'm just a person who is always happy no matter what and a person to whom they can dump all their anger and sorrow at, but I can't tell them anything about myself and now I don't even bother. Even my internet friends bully me a lot :'( I don't really have a true friend, the person I have ever had was driven away by my stepdad.

I'm still being bullied. Now I've started self harming, one day it will hit a vein and that would be the happiest day of my life! And I'm so scared of even getting out of my room, I can't look up at people properly, I can't talk properly and even if I do talk, I'll be marked rude. Because all I am now is a selfish, arrogant, nerd, loner and a lot of other stuff. I've started self harming, acting rude to people, pushing everyone away not allowing anyone to get close. I don't know if I can handle any of this anymore.

This is still just a part of my life, I still don't have the courage of spilling the rest, I just can't...

I'm really sorry for being a worthless, stupid, silly person. Please don't call me an attention seeker. And I'm sorry again that you had to read my stupid silly sob story..