A/N: forgive my choice of chapter title, it was the most requested and so I figured what else do I couple Augustus Waters with than Van Houten?

Chapter 28: Sour as Van Houten

Watching Lottie devour practically all of the leftover cake was like watching a kid meeting Mickey Mouse in Disneyland for the first time. She was surprisingly tidy for someone who ate so quickly.

I stared at her until she stopped and glanced at me, an embarrassed expression on her face. A splotch of pink icing had somehow ended up on the bridge of her nose. I shook my head in amusement and handed her a napkin. Lottie sheepishly wiped her mouth until I moved forward and directed her hand to her nose. Her entire face turned a bright crimson, which made me chuckle.

"You wouldn't happen to be looking at me like that because you want cake and not because you think I'm being a greedy pig, would you?" she asked, almost shyly.

I leant over the counter and rested my chin in my palms. "Do I like cake?" I asked, raising my eyebrows.

She laughed that laugh I adored, despite how embarrassed she was. "Sorry, Benny."

"Don't be," I said. I felt a sharp pain on the back of my head and groaned, reaching around to cradle it.

"Benjamin!" Miss Franny scolded, a large, metal spoon in her hand. "Did you just call the poor girl a greedy pig?"

My eyes widened in terror. "What? No, I didn't!"

I glanced at Lottie for help, and saw that she had a hand covering her mouth to stifle her giggles. "Benjamin," Miss Franny said sternly.

"I swear to God, ma'am, I didn't!"

She shook her head and looked at Lottie. "Don't listen to a word the boy says, dear. He's quite dense - doesn't even realise half the things he says."

My mouth opened and I looked back and forth between my old tutor and Lottie. Lottie's eyes twinkled with mischief, and Miss Franny winked at me. "Miss Franny," I moaned. "Don't put words in my mouth!"

"You don't speak enough, dear, I'm just helping out."

My palms flattened on the counter and I willed myself to not turn red. "Maybe you should just let us eat in peace," I suggested. She patted my head with the spoon and smiled before walking away. I let out a quiet groan, slamming my head down, and Lottie giggled softly. "I didn't call you a greedy pig," I said, my voice muffled by the smooth marble.

"I know, Ben."

I looked up and noticed that she had her gentle smile on, which made me gulp nervously and turn my gaze to the platter of food and plate of cake Miss Franny had put together for us. I picked up a fork and speared one of the mini bangers. "The food is delicious," Lottie said, and I knew she was trying to ease my mortification.

I nodded and popped the banger in my mouth. "Miss Franny is really talented," I said, and then froze when the entire sausage fell out of my mouth.

Lottie and I locked gazes. To her credit, she managed to keep a straight face for all of two seconds before she lost it. Her mouth contorted and she burst into a fit of laughter that had her leaning on her arm, using the other hand to bang at the counter. I sat there, fighting between a grin at how sweet she was and a scowl because she was making fun of me.

"I'm sorry!" she managed to gasp. "Don't be embarrassed...I just - your face!" She started giggling again, her face turning pink from how hard she went at it.

I raised my eyebrows and waited for her to calm down. It took several minutes of which I spent finishing my mini sausages and starting on the casserole dish of poutine.

Suddenly, someone slapped my hand away from my fork. "Hold up, Scooby Doo, let me in on this poutine, yeah?" Lottie smiled at me and picked up her fork.

"Scooby Doo?" I wondered. I frowned. "Was that a crack at my food eating?"

"It wasn't a crack, it was an ode."

"That was not an ode, do you even know what odes are?"

"I know that they exist," she said brightly.

I scoffed. English major, my ass. "Of course they exist, and an ode is supposed to be like a mmfmffm-" Lottie had shoved her fork into my mouth, succeeding in both silencing and almost choking me.

"I think that's the first time I have had to shut you up! I don't care what an ode is while my tummy is empty."

"How is your tummy empty? It's got to be only the size of my fist, and you've already eaten most of the cake," I said.

Lottie giggled into her hand. "What did your Miss Franny say about calling me a pig?"

My mouth opened. "Who called you a pig? Not me. Don't put words in my mouth, not where Miss Franny can hear you," I said, whispering the last part intently.

"I'm just teasing, Benny," she said cheerily, patting my cheek. "Here, want some more poutine?" She held her fork out to me, and I glanced from her fork to her encouraging expression.

"I can feed myself," I muttered, grabbing the fork from her hand. I ate the potatoes and then realised that this was the second time I'd touched her fork with my mouth. That thought made me freeze, and my movements were stiff when I handed the fork back to her.

She just regarded me with amusement. "You're weird," she said, "but sort of in a good way."

I gulped to make myself not act like such an idiot. "Sort of?" I asked, glad that my voice had its regular amount of brusqueness in it.

"Yup, only sort of." She smiled at me and ate her own forkful of poutine. I internally cringed because I had also used that fork. God, I was such a mess. Get your dumbfuck brain out of the clouds, Benjamin. "Are you full?" she asked.

I shrugged awkwardly. "Not really."

"Then stop staring off into space and eat some more, Ben."

"Thanks, Mother," I said with a roll of my eyes.

"Sassy," she said, laughing. "You're so sassy."

I pulled a plate of cheese filled pasties towards me and started scarfing them. Anything to stop me from becoming a total and utter idiot in front of this girl.

Although I was almost one hundred percent sure that she didn't care about that one whit.

***

"I think I just ate my body weight in cake," Lottie groaned, flopping backwards onto my bed.

I sat down on my chair and spun it around to face her. "Was it worth it?"

She grinned. "Yes it was."

I chuckled and turned back to my desk, opening my laptop. I had a maths assignment to turn in, and since we'd be here for a couple days, I had to do it online.

"Ben?"

"Yeah?"

"I don't have anything to change into," she whispered. "Also, I don't have anything - not a toothbrush or a towel or even a comb!"

I frowned and then stood, feeling guilty. It was my fault she was stranded here with no supplies in the first place. If I hadn't have asked her to come, she'd be at her room, happily chilling with her best friend. "We can go get some stuff if you want. I'm sure there's some markets nearby."

Lottie rubbed her arm and mumbled something. I raised my eyebrows. She grinned sheepishly and said, "I don't have any money, Benny boy."

I held up two fingers. "Don't call me Benny boy," I said, putting down one finger. "And seriously? Obviously I'm gonna buy it for you."

"I really can't let you do that," she murmured, sounding uncomfortable. "Don't you have some spares around here?"

"I can get you clean towels and toothpaste, but not any of the other stuff. Unless you wanna wear..." I trailed off and scratched my head, wondering why now of all times I had to run my mouth.

"Wanna wear what?"

I gulped and looked at her curious face. "Obviously you don't have to, I mean, it's totally your decision. We can go to Safeway or maybe BHS and see if they've got something."

Lottie giggled at my stammering. "What were you going to say before, Benny?"

I shoved my hands in my armpits and blinked hard. "Well, you can always wear my shirt if you want. And maybe we can borrow some trousers from Archer. He might also have a spare toothbrush."

It took a few moments before Lottie responded. "Well, I'm all about being cheap and avoiding paying for things," she said cheerily. "I hope you didn't sweat too much, Benny."

My mouth opened at her teasing. "Oh, shut up, Lottie."

She laughed and my frown melted off my face. "I'm shutting up."

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OKAY THIS STORY HIT OVER A MILLION READS AND IM CRYING. HOW DO I THANK YOU GUYS? DO YOU EVEN UNDERSTAND HOW HAPPY I AM? I AM GOING TO KEEL OVER AND PASS OUT. SHOOT ME I JUST REACHED MY LIFE GOAL. It's taken me almost three years, but I finally made it!