a/n: clearly the time between when i published parts is getting to me, because i swear to God that ch 43 was the first time Ben said 'i love you' to Lottie. he said it before in ch 36 while they were kissing, but she couldn't hear it bc he didn't say it clearly. and then in ch 38, he said it but she'd fallen asleep. ...but in ch 40 the cake had 'i love you' in icing, that's right. but he has never said it, right? no he didn't, i checked. 

"You know, Benny, I have a question," Lottie said. Even after what had just happened, she still wanted to get her food, so I was following her through Safeway while she picked out everything she needed.

"Yes?"

"How did you hear all that stuff I said to Rick?" she asked, turning to look at me. Her eyebrows furrowed. "Were you already there?"

I frowned when I realised what she was thinking. "I wasn't just watching you get hit, Lottie. I heard the screaming, so I ran up and got there as he tried to hit you again."

She smiled and took my hand, giving it a squeeze. I covered it with my other hand and saw her face flush a little bit, which made me inwardly grin. "Okay," she said, visibly relaxing. "I just-"

"I know," I said. "You texted me about shopping, so I was coming to meet you." I rolled my eyes. "I'm not stupid enough to just watch that piece of shit lay his filthy hand on you." Thinking about it made me shake with anger all over again. He fucking slapped Lottie, why was he not dead?

Lottie laughed. Noticing me starting to shake again, she kissed my knuckle as if I was a princess. "But you're a little stupid, right?" she teased.

She stopped in front of the cereal aisle, which gave me the opportunity to examine her face. She seemed perfectly okay, but she always did that when she was upset. I could see that his slap had irritated her face, and her cheek was red. I breathed in and out, trying to calm myself down enough so that I wouldn't stop back out to the bus stop and beat the life out of that stupid piece of shit.

Rick Bienvenue. Ugh, maybe he was rich, but his ugly mug showed both on the outside and the inside. I never wanted him near Lottie again, and if I ever saw him again, I don't think even Lottie could pull me back.

Well, to be honest, she probably could, but that was besides the point.

I slung my arm around Lottie's shoulders and scooted closer to her while she debated between Frosted Flakes and Cocoa Krispies. "If you ever see that motherfucker again, put aside your stupid morals and kick him in the wanker again," I said.

"My stupid morals?" she repeated, amused. "Don't worry, Benny, he probably won't bother me again in fear that you'll rip off his face."

"Okay...gross, but true."

"What do we do about him?"

I pursed my lips. "What can we do? Anything we try, his precious daddy will just bail him out." Rick Bienvenue Senior, CEO of Bienvenue Oil. A face everybody in England knew. Untouchable.

Lottie chose the Cocoa Krispies. "He used to not be like this. He was okay. Not great, kind of arrogant, but he couldn't even hurt a fly. I haven't seen him since his accident, though, so I can't say what that did to him."

I shook my head. "Whatever, he's a prick, and he deserves my fist in his face."

"It's okay, Ben," Lottie said vaguely, strolling down the aisle. "Not everything bad that happens needs revenge. I'm just going to leave it."

Once again, I was floored by the amount of forgiveness and love this tiny princess held in her heart. It would've sickened me once upon a time, but now I just wondered how I could ever deserve her. "But he hit you!" I argued.

"He's not himself. He just got over his amnesia, it seems like. Brain damage always changes people."

"That doesn't excuse being a complete and total arse."

She shrugged. "It's okay. Look at me, it's okay." She grabbed my hand again and used her other hand to turn my face towards her. I scowled, and she grinned. "He'll leave us, and we'll leave him. And that's that. We already kicked him twice...down there...so it's even, right?"

I looked away, and my scowl deepened. "Not really," I muttered. "But if you just want to leave it, I suppose-"

"Charlie."

"Oh for fuck's sake!" I growled. Lottie made a surprised noise and tightened her grip on my hand. I pulled her behind the trolley and stretched my arm out in front of her. "Do you ever let up?"

Rick, covered in dirt and slumped over with red eyes, stared at Lottie. I gritted my teeth. "Chill out, Benjamin," he said. "I'm not drunk anymore."

"You being drunk isn't an excuse." I had to remind myself to keep breathing and keep focusing, otherwise I would fucking lose it. "Are you having a laugh, mate? Want me to finish the job off of kicking off your testicals?"

"Just shut up, I'm not talking to you!" he snapped.

"What's up, Rick?" Lottie piped up. I wanted to groan out loud at her for all eternity. How could someone be so forgiving and kind and just...I'm going to lose my fucking mind.

He opened his mouth, attempting to speak several different times. I glared at him, my arms crossed and my foot tapping the ground impatiently. "Fuck, Charlie, I can't speak with your new boyfriend staring at me like he's going to fucking run me through with a butter knife!"

Lottie raised her eyebrows, but she didn't deny the 'new boyfriend' remark. I had to hide my smirk so I could continue to stare menacingly at Rick. "Can you blame him?" she asked softly and pointed at the cheek that he had slapped. "Just say it. What do you need?"

He looked like he was in extreme pain, which confused me enough that I dropped my glare. What the fuck was he waiting for? Did he know that the longer he stood around here, the more likely I was to throw a punch at his stupid fucking head? "Okay, I'll just say it. Charlie, I'm sorry."

Lottie's eyes widened. "Er...okay?"

"Look, that's all I have to say. You don't have to accept it, but that kick to the dick kind of knocked some sense into me." He paused, staring at the ground. I couldn't believe what was hearing, and it seemed like Lottie couldn't either.

"You kind of threatened to rape me," she said, her voice cracking. I gulped, worried for her. "You hit me. And you said all those horrible things about Ben. Come on, Rick. You can't blame it all on the alcohol."

"I know. I just wanted to tell you before I left. I'm going back home, and I'll leave you guys alone now. I just...sorry, Charlie. Bye." He turned around to leave, but then turned around to look at me. "Also, I said a bunch of random shit about you to Charlie, and she didn't believe it for a second. You should probably know that." And then he hobbled away.

I looked at Lottie, who smiled sheepishly at me. I felt my tiny, shrivelled heart expand as I looked at her embarrassed expression. "That was weird," she said cheerfully.

I smiled at her. "You're weird," I said. "I still want to punch him in the neck."

"Yeah, I know."

"Throttle him."

"Yup."

"Throw him into a volcano."

Lottie patted my arm and started searching for her groceries again. She put a bag of oranges in the trolley, and I just kept following and watching her. Dammit, she was such a good person.

"Do you forgive him, Lottie?" I finally asked.

"He said sorry," she said, as a way of answering. "I feel kind of bad for him."

I snorted. "Why?"

She shrugged. "He's rich, but I mean, look at his dad. He put his son in a coma, and all he cared about was covering it up so his reputation wouldn't be destroyed." She shook her head sadly, and I wondered where all this unconditional love was coming from. Rick didn't deserve it, I didn't deserve it. Nobody did.

"But that doesn't excuse-"

"It doesn't," she interrupted. "It doesn't, but he said sorry and I forgive him. And now we never have to think about it again, because he's leaving." She smiled brightly and stopped walking. "I think I have everything."

I looked into the trolley that was literally full to the brim. "Why do you have so much stuff?"

"Some of it is for you and Clark," she said without skipping a beat.

I didn't know why every time she did things like this I was shocked, but I still was. "You do know I'm not letting you pay for all of this?"

She looked at me with wide, puppy-dog eyes and pouted very slightly. I blinked and had to take a step back. "Come on, Ben! Let me pay!"

"No, no, no, you can't do that, that's not fair!" I complained. She knew, she knew if she did that thing with her eyes and cocked her head like that I would give in. I covered my eyes with one hand and grabbed the trolley with the other.

"I love you," she said softly.

I shook my head, even as I felt my ears become hot and a smile emerge. "I love you, too."

Lottie tugged my hand away from my face and smiled gently at me. I stared at her, not sure what spell she was putting me under. "Will you let me pay?"

I leant forward so that my mouth was right next to her head. I grinned when I felt her go still as I breathed in her ear. Two can play at this game. "Lottie," I said. I touched her face very lightly.

"Y-yeah?"

"No." I grabbed the trolley and started sprinting towards the checkout, thankful that Lottie was still innocent enough that stuff like what I just did was enough to shock her into staying put.

"W-wait, what? Ben!"

I reached the cashier way before her and was able to hand in my credit card just as she reached. She bent over, breathing heavily and coughing. I laughed at her. "Nice try, babe," I said.

"I'll get you next time," she tried to threaten, but she was wheezing too much for me to take her seriously.

I just kept laughing and put all the bags back into the trolley. "Come on, I'll drive you back."

She shook her head, frowning at me, but followed anyway. "I can't believe you did that," she muttered.

"Don't be sad, princess. We both know who's the smarter one here," I teased. I patted her head like a dog and she shoved me away, laughing. She could never be annoyed for very long.

"Oh, you be quiet!"

"Not until you admit that I defeated you," I said.

She crossed her arms and shook her head firmly. "I'll get you," she said. "Watch your back, Ben!"

And it turned out I was wrong, and she was right, because after I dropped her and all of her groceries off, I dug my hands in my pockets and realised that she'd shoved four twenty pound notes inside without me noticing.

Lottie would be the death of me.