Micah takes me on a date the next day.

Neither one of us have any other plans for the entire Sunday so he picks me up at one to go to lunch and then from there, I'm not sure what we're doing. I wasn't aware that we were going on a date today, I thought that we were just hanging out so this is a pleasant surprise. It's been a while since I've been on a real date and that I've gotten to wear casual clothes on a date.

I'm wearing skinny jeans and black ankle booties with barely any heel. My shirt is a cropped blouse with wide cold shoulders so it's kind of sexy but also casual and then a leather jacket to stay warm. I look really cute but I don't look overdone.

He takes me to a cute little deli for lunch and they have the best fries so I get a BLT with a side of fries and a chocolate milkshake. Micah orders a turkey club and a Pepsi with no ice. I can't stop looking into his eyes because they're so beautiful and he looks so happy right now. He's smiling a lot; he has a really beautiful smile. But I can't stop looking into his eyes.

"How are your classes going?" I ask him as I dip a fry in ketchup and then pop it into my mouth.

"Tough," He sighs. "But that's expected, you know, it's law school. I feel like by the end of this year, I'll have read an entire library of books. My property law class is as painful as stabbing myself in the asshole with a serrated knife."

His analogy makes me snort with laughter which is a bit embarrassing so I pretend to cough to cover it up. "That sounds pretty painful then. If you don't like it, why are you taking it?"

"Well, I don't really get to pick which classes I take so I'm stuck for now. But next year, I'll get to choose more classes for my specialization."

"What's your specialization?" I ask him.

"Business law. More specifically, small business. I know this all sounds really boring, are you sure that you want to sit here and listen to me talk about law school?" He looks skeptical about how interested I really am in this conversation. But I really am interested in it because I want to know about him. Everything about him. And what he's studying, what he wants to study, that says a lot about him. Clearly, if he's going to school for it, he's passionate about it so it says a lot about him too. Then again, I love his voice so much that I would hang on his every word no matter what he was saying.

"Yes, I'm really interested. It's not boring, I promise. So what's small business law? You're talking to somebody who dropped out of high school, I'll remind you."

"It's pretty much helping people create a business, making sure that they are doing everything legally. It deals with stuff like tax classifications, how to hire employees, proper zoning and licensing, stuff like that," He explains to me. "It's kind of hard to make friends there because the classes are graded competitively, so if you do better than your classmates, your grade will get better. It's brutal in there."

"But you really like what you're doing?" I wonder curiously.

"Yeah, I really like it," He confirms with a nod.

"Then you'll kick ass," I assure him, eating another fry. "I've been taking less shifts at the factory so I've been thinking about getting a second part time job to get some more money."

"I can get you something at my dad's office," Micah is quick to suggest. "Like an assistant or a receptionist or something like that if you wanted. It'd pay better than something like fast food or Walmart."

"Wouldn't that be weird? Me working with your dad?" I ask him.

"Well, he's not there all of the time. If it's weird for you though, I can understand that. It was just a thought."

"I'll think about it. I haven't decided if I even want to get another job yet, I'm just considering it. Thank you," I smile at him. I wouldn't mind working in his father's office. There is the threat of seeing Jay or Silas around but if the pay is good, I think that it could be worth it.

As if he can read my mind, he adds, "You wouldn't see Silas or anything. They're in the same committee but they don't work together very often in their offices."

"That's good. Hey, did I ever tell you that he bought me a car?" I say before I take a big bite of my sandwich.

"Silas did? Wow, that's... big."

"Yeah. I didn't give it back. I know that I should have because it sent the wrong message, that I am okay with talking to him about things, but I really wanted a car," I explain the story to him. "It's shallow, I know. But it's a nice car."

"After how he's treated you, buying you a nice car is the least that he can do," Micah informs me.

"I guess so. I feel like he'll want me to talk to him now, about... I don't know. My feelings or something. Anyway, I don't want to talk about my dad. Where are we going after lunch?"

"I was thinking a movie or something," He tells me with a shrug. "Unless you have a preference. I'm sorry if you wanted a big romantic date, I dropped the ball. I'm so busy with school though."

"I wasn't expecting anything, don't worry about it," I assure him. "What about the botanical gardens? It's really beautiful. I used to take Casey all of the time because it's always an adventure and it's free."

"Yeah, that sounds like fun," Micah goes along with my on-the-spot idea so we finish eating and he pays. I offer to pay for my food but he insists so I just tell him that I'll pay for our next meal.

The United States Botanic Garden is right in the middle of Washington D.C. and close to a lot of other really common tourist attractions. It's right across the street from the Capitol building and there are a few national museums around too. I've taken Casey to all of the big museums in the city throughout the years just so that he could learn because learning in Cynthia and Davis's house was chaotic. There were always kids running around, babies crying, and it was just crammed.

There are monuments for everything in D.C., so when Casey was studying World War II in school, we'd go sit at the World War II Monument while he did his homework. Or the Smithsonian museum for American history to do his history homework. So I've gotten to know the museums pretty well and because they were free, Casey loved going, and it got me out of the house and away from Davis, we went very often. Even after we left the foster home, we would still visit the museums all of the time.

My favorite one of these spots is the Botanic Garden and I haven't been here in a while so it'll be nice to go back.

Once we get to the museum, we walk around holding hands like the couple that we are. Since Micah has never been here before, I show him around. The plans are always changing so I don't know exactly what's in bloom but they have different themed rooms.

We stop in the Jungle Room with giant green plants, tall trees, and a really pretty view if you look up to see all of the twisting vines up the thin trunks of the trees. It's very muggy and humid in this room though, so when we take a break, I slip off my jacket and we take a seat on one of the benches in the room. I sit sideways, with my legs lying across Micah's lap.

"I can see you in a place like this," He informs me as he's still looking around to take the place in. "It's very you. I can see you just sitting here, writing the poetry that you won't let other people read."

"I don't do that," I shake my head at him. "For one, I'm always with Casey when I come here and secondly, I don't write because I like to. I just write when I'm upset about something and I need to get it off of my chest."

"So you'll never write anything about me?" He asks me curiously.

I shrug at him. "I'm not sure. If you really piss me off or hurt me then I guess that I might."

"You're so tough, I don't think that I could hurt you even if I tried."

"You give me too much credit," I warn him.

"Well anyway, I don't want you to write about me if it's not good, so I guess that I'll just never get on your bad side," Micah decides.

"That's probably for the best," I agree with him.

"Although, I guess that it doesn't really matter what you write because you'll never let me read it," He adds, giving me a look that tells me that he's still very unhappy about that fact.

"Tell you what," I open up my small bag and pull out a little notebook that I have in there and a pencil. "I'll write you a poem right now and you'll see how bad I am at it and why I won't let you read anything that I've written. Alright?"

"Sure, let's see what you've got," He nods, looking excited.

It takes me a while to think but Micah is patient with me. He watches me write but I keep the notebook tilted so that he can't see what I'm writing. Between lines, I have to stop and think or sometimes, I'll have to backtrack and erase a few words. I like my poems to have a rhythm so I try to make the number of syllables match up which makes it a bit harder.

Micah waits silently the whole time to give me time to think so that I can make it as good as I can get it. The only 'training' I've ever had was just reading other people's poetry, which is a good teacher, but that doesn't make me a good writer so I know that it's not a great poem. I told him that I'd let him read it though, so when I'm done, I read over it one last time and prepare for impact.

"Alright, it's finished. If you hate it, just say that you hate it. I already know that I suck at this," I warn him. "And you should know that I don't ever let people read this stuff so you should feel very special right now."

He smiles at me very handsomely and holds his hand out for the notebook. Reluctantly, I hand it over. I can't look at him when he reads it so I look at our surroundings, the wide leaves and the little kids taking a tour with their family up on the second-floor deck through the canopy.

I can barely breathe in the silence, waiting for him to finish reading it. Eventually, I hear the notebook shut so I anxiously glance over at him and wait for his response. He hands me back the notebook before he says, "I loved it."

"You're lying."

"I'm really not," He promises me and then he leans over and kisses me. There are kids in the room so it's a very quick kiss but it's definitely nice. My stomach always flips just a little bit when we kiss. "You're way too hard on yourself, Eleanor, it's really amazing."

I take the notebook from him and put it in my purse again so that we can both forget that that just happened.

"Okay well, that happened, so you can't say that I have never let you read anything of mine because I just did," I remind him triumphantly. "We should go somewhere else now, this humidity is making me sweaty."

I carry my jacket with me so that I don't have to wear it and then we walk, hand in hand again, out of the conservatory and into the regional garden. Outside, it's clear that summer is losing its touch and being taken over by fall. Today's a nice day but the plants are getting tired, some of the trees are starting to die for the season.

"Have you talked to Josie lately?" Micah asks me as we're walking along a thin boardwalk over a pond area. "You haven't talked about her much."

"She's texted me a few times but not really. She's still getting settled in again with her dad and she's dealing with a lot. Plus, she has school," I explain to him because he doesn't know what Josie went through with Davis and if he did know, I'm sure that he would be able to make the short leap that Davis had also hurt me that same way. It didn't take Casey any time at all to make that connection.

"So how do you like having the apartment to yourself?" He follows up.

"It's quiet and empty and boring," I admit to him. "I've never had a place just to myself so I don't even know what to do with it."

"I'm sure that you'll get used to it," Micah assures me. "You can play your music really loud, walk around naked, watch whatever you want to watch on TV. There are lots of cool things that you can do with your own place."

"Sure, I guess you're right," I concede with a small laugh. "Maybe I'll just get used to it. I miss having Casey around though. I can't really stand not knowing exactly how he's doing. I know that if he needs more money, he won't ask for it. Or if he's having a hard time, he won't tell me because he doesn't want me to worry. But I'm not there so I just have to trust him when he says that he's having a great time."

"He's probably really happy there," He says. "It's a great school and he's a nice kid so he's probably already made friends. You've done a great job being there for him but he has to grow up eventually."

"I know," I sigh. "If I don't get another job, I'll have to find a hobby or something to keep me busy."

"You could go back to school," Micah offers me.

"I don't have that kind of money," I remind him with a small laugh at how ridiculous that suggestion is. I can't imagine what I'd have to do with my clients to get the kind of money that it takes to go to college.

"There's scholarships," He adds. "And community colleges aren't too expensive."

"They don't give scholarships out to people who got their GED four years ago," I inform him slowly. "And they aren't that expensive, I know, but all of my extra money right now is going to Casey's school because that's not cheap. I'm a lost cause, I've accepted that, but Casey isn't. I'm putting all of my effort into that right now."

"Sure, but-"

"Maybe I'll think about it once I get Casey through school," I interrupt him. "I mean, how much is your tuition?"

"It's Georgetown Law, El, it's a lot more expensive than-"

"I know," I interrupt him again because I obviously know that his school is a whole lot more expensive than what a community college would cost but that's not the point that I'm trying to make. "Just how much is it?"

He lets out a long sigh and then says, "About 55 grand."

"Do you pay that?" I ask him.

I think that he can tell where I'm going with this now because he looks resigned to his fate and admits, "My parents do."

"Exactly. It's different for you," I remind him as we visit the empty amphitheater and sit down on one of the long, curved benches to take a break from walking through the garden. "And it's not a bad thing that your parents pay your way through school, I think that it's so great that you're that lucky. But I don't have that. And it's not easy to get financial aid. I've looked into it. I know that you mean well but we come from completely different sides of the class spectrum so you don't really get what it's like for me to try to go to school."

"Yeah, okay. I guess that I don't," He finally agrees with me. "But there has to be some way. It's not fair that you can't go to school to get a better life, after everything that you've been through."

That makes me laugh. "If the world was fair, my life wouldn't be nearly as exciting as it is."

"What would you do?" Micah wonders. "If you could go to school? What would you study?"

"I would want to become a social worker," I inform him. I'd already thought about this a little while ago when I was out to dinner with Dr. Blates so I have an answer ready. "And hey, I'm not hopeless yet. I can still save up for it, I just have to save up for Casey first and then I'll deal with myself."

"You don't always have to put yourself second, you know," He tells me.

"I kind of do. I'm all that he has," I remind him slowly as I lean into him. The wind outside feels nice because it's not too forceful but it's enough of a gust to feel calming.

"Who do you have?"

"I don't like where this conversation has taken us," I decide, resting my head on his shoulder. "Let's talk about something else."

He doesn't want to change the subject, I can tell by his hesitation, but he eventually does start talking about the cool swampy-looking view in front of us.

I know that he wanted me to answer his question but he has to know that I won't do that. We both know the answer, anyway, so I don't see the point in announcing it out loud that of course I don't have anybody to support me. I don't know Micah well enough yet to consider him 'there for me' and my father bought me a car but that's all he's done in a decade. So no, I do not have anybody 'there for me' but I think that I've been doing fine. Just fine. Okay, alright, mediocre. Not great, not amazing.

I'm just fine.