TW // panic attack

Clay was walking through the hallway when he heard Skeppy shouting and ran to him.

Skeppy was with Bad, facing Grian. They had just run into each other; Clay was happy for a second because he could finally ask him about George, but he stopped when he saw Skeppy was upset.

"Didn't you take him home? What did you do?!"

Grian was caught off guard, he didn't say anything but Mumbo came out of nowhere and spoke harshly to Skeppy, stepping in front of Grian.

"He didn't do anything to George! We're both his friends- why would you blame us?!"

"Because you guys are the last ones seen with him and NO ONES SEEN HIM SINCE! You must have done something or said SOMETHING! ITS YOUR FAULT!"

"Our fault?" Grian's face hardened. "The one who said something was Clay." He looked past Skeppy to where Clay was standing.

Clay's heart rate doubled at the accusation.

No-

"Hey-" Bad cut in- "this isn't his fault. It's no one's fault. Skeppy-"

"No Bad. I know they had something to do with it! Tell me what you did!" Skeppy pushed Grian back onto the floor.

"HEY GET OFF HIM!" Mumbo yanked Skeppy backwards and Bad tried to make him let go.

"Stop guys- STOP FIGHTING-"

Clay was frozen where he was, everything far away.

No you're wrong

It can't be-

"HE WOULDN'T JUST LEAVE!" Skeppy yelled, struggling against Mumbo, who was holding him back from Grian. "YOU DID SOMETHING- ITS YOUR FAULT!"

Mumbo pushed him back. "DON'T SAY THAT ABOUT GRIAN! YOU DON'T KNOW HIM!"

A6d was next to Clay. "What's going on, Clay-" he caught sight of his face- "are you okay?"

Not my-

fault

"Hold on-" a6d stood up to Mumbo. "Let go of Skeppy."

"He pushed-"

"Mumbo." Grian stood up, cradling his arm. "That's enough."

Skeppy was still futilely trying to get to him. "YOU'RE BEHIND THIS I KNOW IT-"

"Skeppy-"

"NO BAD THERE'S NO OTHER EXPLANATION! IT HAD TO BE THEM!" A6d had to hold him back.

"You're wrong," Grian said.

He looked at Clay.

"You made a mistake when you hurt George."

hurt-

To Skeppy Grian said, "he was the last one to talk to him. Take out your anger on the one who deserves it."

Skeppy opened his mouth but a6d beat him to it-

"That's bullshit."

"Come on, Mumbo, let's go."

They receded back down the hallway.

Skeppy shook off a6d. Clay stumbled back into the wall.

George.

Clay slid down the wall, hands over his ears, the image of George at the party in front of his eyes. Cold-

"You guys-" Skeppy turned on a6d and Bad.

"Shut up Skeppy."

Vincent crouched down next to Clay. The others crowded around him.

Grian glanced back from the end of the hallway, his brow furrowed; they disappeared.

George-

my fault-

hurt him-

Clay was breathing fast and shallow.

Tears came down his face.

"Clay- Clay can you hear me?" A6d.

"What's wrong with him-" Skeppy.

"I don't know." A6d's voice sounded faded.

Clay's vision was blurry. He couldn't stop shaking. It was all wrong.

"Who do I go get- we need to get help-" Bad murmured.

"Clay." A6d put his hand on his arm. "Clay, listen, what do you need? We can help. Tell us what you need."

"I-"

"I can't-"

His chest was heaving.

"I can't breathe-

George-"

"What do we do?" Bad was panicked.

"Stay calm," Vin said "Just stay calm. Clay, focus on breathing okay? Breathe slowly."

"What do I do-" Skeppy tugged on a6d's arm- "a6d what-"

"Skeppy- you and Bad stop freaking out- it's not helping, mon dieu. Clay do a breath in and count to five with me. One... two... three... um, what's this one- f- four... five. Ok, now out: one, two, three, four, five..."

Clay slowly stopped hyperventilating and his heart rate gradually slowed down again. His face was wet with tears but the panic and fear had mostly gone.

When it had mostly subsided he sighed and put his head on his knees, drained.

A6d relaxed. The others were silent.

Clay felt guilty for troubling them. They didn't need his problems. He tried to hide.

He sniffed. "Sorry guys."

"No, don't be sorry," a6d said. "Are you ok now- or um, better?"

"More or less." He was exhausted.

There was quiet for a moment, Bad broke the silence.

"We have class soon."

"Fuck that." Vin stood up. "Let's take him home; we can skip the rest of the day."

"Well, yeah, ok," Bad was kinda reluctant but he wanted to make sure Clay was ok.

"Fine," Skeppy said, glaring down the hallway. "We don't have a car."

"We can use my friend's. I'll drive," a6d offered.

A little while later, Clay was dozing in the backseat next to Bad; Skeppy was in the front and a6d was driving.

"How did you know what to do?" Bad asked quietly.

"I don't know," a6d answered. " Just knew it wasn't right to freak out and I tried to help him." He glanced at Clay in the mirror.

"Was it their fault?" Skeppy asked, clenching his fists. "Did they do that to him?"

"No. Why would they, Skeppy," Bad said. "They- hmmm."

A6d took a second longer to answer. "Not directly. Not int- I don't know- intent-" he sighed- "not on purpose."

"Intentionally?" Bad offered.

"Yes."

"What were you going to say, Bad?" Skeppy twisted around in his seat.

Bad looked thoughtfully out the window. "I thought they were nice people."

"Even nice people can get mad if you threaten them," a6d muttered.

Skeppy turned on him. "You're saying this is my fault?! You weren't even there for the whole thing and-"

"I'm saying you could have handled it better."

Bad made a noise from the backseat.

"Bad?"

"I didn't say anything."

"You agree with him?!"

"I DIDN'T say anything."

"You sound like you agree with him!"

"FINE Skeppy! Maybe I DO agree with him. You didn't have to push Grian over to try and get answers out of him- but oh no I'm Skeppy and I'll just tank everything and I don't know what I'm doing but I'll just do it anyway cuz there are NO consequences! Maybe I AM a little mad at you for starting a fight and now they probably won't even talk to us again."

Skeppy faced forward and crossed his arms. "Well I'm mad at you because you didn't have my back in there. Neither of you did.

...It was like you were on their side."

A6d finally got pissed at him. "You saying all this about sides and fault and it's like you don't even remember why you are so angry. You just get so- so- fired up! That you don't think about what you are doing! Bad's right- what if they could tell us something and now they won't?! You probably just lost us a good chance at finding George!"

"So now you are saying it's my fault. Yeah of course it's SKEPPY'S fault- SKEPPY'S always messing things up isn't he? You know what-"

"No Skeppy, you listen for a minute," Bad cut him off.

"I'm sorry for what I just said and we don't need to be fighting because that just causes more problems- so shut up and swallow your pride and I want both of you to apologize to each other." He glared at both of them.

A6d sighed.

"I'm sorry Skeppy. You don't always mess things up-

Just lots of times-"

"BAD?!"

"A6d-"

"Fine! Not lots of times! Now shut up before you wake up Clay."

"Ok, now you Skeppy. Apologize."

Skeppy whined, "Fiiiine. A6d I'm sorry for messing it up even though I was just TrYiNG to figure things out and get information out of him."

"Yeah sure," a6d made a disbelieving noise.

"Good enough," Bad said.

There was another minute of silence, the tension in the car relaxed.

Skeppy scoffed, "I can't believe you forgot the number four."

"I was under pressure ok?! I can't remember everything all the time!"

"You're bad at English," Skeppy said in a singsong voice. He stuck out his tongue at him.

"What now?" Bad asked.

"We just help Clay however we can and try to find George," a6d said. "We're almost there."

Skeppy muttered something under his breath.

"It's his birthday the day after tomorrow right?" Bad asked.

"Oh shit." Skeppy groaned.

"Language."

"I can't believe I forgot that," a6d said. "Ah, he will hate his birthday if George doesn't show up by then."

"What should we do then?" Bad asked.

"I don't know why you're asking me so much?! I don't know!"

"WELL you're the one answering- oh my goodness, whatever. We'll figure it out."

The rest of the car ride was quiet.

(1.4k words)