"... there's no one more understanding

than someone who shares a similar experience..."

"I was six years old when I lost both of my parents. At the time I didn't understand what death was. I just knew that they were not around me anymore and I was never going to see them again." Theo spoke softly. He's seated beside me on the bed. We have been quiet ever since we came from his private jet hanger where we viewed the bodies. I feel numb. I think even my mind has stopped working. It's blank. For the first time in my life I'm not thinking of anything. "The man left to take care of me, told me that it's all right to cry just for that day. He told me he will teach me to be strong and he told me that the pain will pass."

I looked into his tender blue eyes. They looked pained. "Did it pass?"

He draped his arm over my shoulder and sighed deeply. "There are days when it feels heavy especially when I have fond memories of them or on the anniversary of their deaths. These are days I'm reminded I'm an orphan. Then there are days when I feel somewhat okay. But there are no perfect days. However, I promise you that the pain will ease with time ma chérie. That I promise you. And through the bad days I will be right beside you to be the shoulder you need to lean on and to be your comfort and strength."

I leaned into him and sighed deeply.

I can't believe this has happened to me. It's just when I think things can't get worse that they get worse. I didn't believe it until Theo took me to the jet hanger where I got to see them. I haven't told Keith. I think I'll do so later on today. His lawyer is working on an appeal for his case.

"If you don't mind telling me..." I rested my palm on his palm. His fingers wrapped around my hand. I felt his lips on my temple. "... how did your parents die?"

"Car crash."

I sat up right to look at him. This must be bad deja vu for him. "I'm so sorry Theo. I didn't mean to-"

"Hush now." He whispered. "It's been twenty years. Believe it or not I can talk about it."

"Maybe some day I'll he strong enough to talk about my losses."

"You will."

I need to sell off some things for quick cash." I got up from the bed to walk the ceiling to floor window overlooking Manhattan. It's a beautiful day. The sun came out. "Do you think you can take me home?"

"Of course. I can take you home. What do you need cash for?" He asked me.

"To pay for the funeral."

"Let me take care of it."

"No Theo. You have done enough. I can't take anymore from you without using you. I'll be fine. My mom had really nice jewelry."

"Don't sell your mother's jewelry. I know the future looks bleak right now but you'll look back and wish you would never have sold them. Let me take care of you. Don't worry about what it costs because you don't have to pay back."

"Are you sure?"

"In this case, I know what you are going through and I want to help you. I had someone who got me through my loss. I want to do that for you. There are no strings attached. I promise." I nodded. "I'll ask Taylor to arrange the funeral. When do you want to bury them?"

When is the best time to say goodbye to someone you love? There's never a good time. That is why people leave without saying goodbye because goodbyes are painful. This one is especially painful because they are not on a journey and will return soon. They are gone from my life. It's just Keith and I.

Keith...

"Can you take me to the prison tomorrow? I would like to see Keith. He needs to hear it from me. Then together we can decide when the funeral will be."

"I would like to meet him if you don't mind."

"He would like to meet you too. I'm sure."

I felt his arms wrap around my midsection. He pressed his body against mine and rested his chin on my shoulder. His sigh is loud with sadness. "How is the baby?" He asked me.

"Healthy. That is what the doctor said."

Theo was scared. He took me straight to hospital after the dramatic expression of grief I demonstrated. He kept asking me to calm down, something I didn't want to hear. He took me to the hospital after that. He didn't see the doctor with me. He stayed outside.

"That's great. Why don't you rest? I'll run some errands and then we can have dinner together."

"It sounds like a plan ."

He took me back to bed, covered me up and kissed my cheek. "I'll be right back."

I closed my sore eyes as soon as he drew the curtains closed. I need the rest. Maybe when I wake up I'll know what to say to Keith.

"Who are you?" I paused at the door to stare at the man with slick dark her and sharp blue eyes, seated on the other side of the table. The prison guard pushed me forward.

"Detective Monroe." He gestured to the empty seat. "Please "

"Where is Timmy?"

My heart beat is steadily rising.

"Please sit down Mr Bale." He insisted. I took a seat. He leaned forward. "Timothy Rowland was found dead in alley yesterday morning."

I rested my back against the chair. Timmy is dead. I feared something like this would happen to him especially after I realized that the guard who heard his guess about the Mafia being behind this actually worked for Mancini. I turned to stare at the bastard who must have informed Mancini. He is pretending not to notic that I'm staring at him. I gave my attention to the new guy.

"That's... unfortunate. Who are you again?"

"Detective Monroe. I am picking up where detective Rowland left off. For a strange reason he kept a vague report on you. His other reported on other cases are thorough but you... nothing. Why?"

I shrugged.

"Let's go over the details of your case. We have in our possession the gun used-"

"Is Tommy really dead?" I interrupted him. "Or is he playing games?"

He called the guard. "Can you get me today's newspaper? We will be all right." The guard left. As soon as he was gone, he leaned closer to me. "Rowland was digging up n shit he had no business in." My blood ran cold. Absolutely cold. "Mancini wants prisoner 5935 dead today. He's not fucking around Nicko. Do that and Keira's slate is washed clean. Fail and there will be consequences."

He moved back just in time for the guard to come back with a newspaper. He showed me the front page. It's true. Tommy was found dead. It was a mugging. He was stabbed repeatedly. Timmy... why did he poke around?

"Why send the guard away to talk to me?" I whispered.

"Because I prefer that no one knows I'm working for him."

"But you told me."

"I'll have something on you by the end of the day. You have leverage, I have leverage. Who knows, we may just be besties soon. Thank you for your time Mr Bale. I'll be seeing you."

After he left I was returned to the rest of the prisoners. I have the blade tied to my wrist, under the long sleeved white tee. I have been keeping tabs on the prisoner 5935. He's q big guy. He won't go down easy. He is almost twice my size. I remember the time Bruce and I took down someone twice our size. It was team work. I wish he was here right now.

This is not a fist fight. Mancini expects me to kill someone. I don't know how this ends. I don't expect anything to work out for me if not getting worse. But Keira will be free from all this chaos I brought into her life.

Am I hero?

No. I'm not a hero. I'm just cleaning up a mess I made.

"Fancy meeting you here!" I looked up.

"Keith?"

I almost cannot recognize him without a head full of dirty blond curly hair!

He gave me a quick shoulder bump. "In the flesh. I was in the neighborhood and I thought you look familiar." He chuckled.

Despite being seriously irresponsible, Keith has a casual laid back nature. He tends to be funny too.

"It's me all right." He leaned against the wall. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm here for a day or two. I have court. I'm appealing."

"That's cool."

"Yeah man. I hope it works out." He has eyes just like Kei's. Sapphires.

"What are you doing?"

"Just hanging out." I shrugged.

"Alone? Haven't you made any friends?"

I raised an eyebrow at him. "I don't make friends that easily."

"It's because you piss people off from the word go." He chuckled. I found myself smiling. My mother can make friends with anyone. Absolutely anyone. My dad prefers it when people stay away from him. I'm not outrightly friendly. I have to trust someone before they get close. For some people like Kei, my trust was immediate and without bias. For others never.

"You've been here before, right?"

"Right."

"What do you know about the big guy with a ponytail."

"They call him Mad Dog. He has a temper that flares us as fast as rocket fuel."

"What is he in for?"

"Uh..." Keith got uncomfortably close to me but I imagine he wants to whisper something. "He has ties to the Italian Mafia. Rumour has it he is cutting a deal with prosecution to get out of here before he is sentenced."

So Mancini wants him dead because this guy probably knows too much! If I wasn't on a time crunch, I would use this to my advantage.

He's coming this way, accompanied by the guard who told me I have to kill him. The guard gave me a nod. "Later man." I left Keith and followed the guard and prisoner 5935.

I am keeping my distance, careful not to make it obvious that I'm following. With every step I'm taking, my heart is pounding hard against my chest. I'm going to kill a man. I will have to do this for the second time in my life. This time, it's not self defense. It's not nonno helplessly lying on the floor almost about to get shot. I'm attacking someone. I'm trying to rationalize this in my mind. What if Mancini won't hold his end of the deal? What then? What am I walking into?

What the fuck am I doing?

I froze. I swallowed with difficulty, forcing saliva down my dry throat. I have no idea if anything Mancini has said is true. Will he really leave Keira alone? Even if he does, am I not giving him a noose to hold around my neck by killing for him? He will be able to pull this noose any time he wants.

I forced myself to step forward and continue walking when a memory of Keira smiling came back to mind. I haven't seen that smile in a long time. This is for her. I'm killing in her name.

I walked into the room where the guard has left prisoner 5935. "Get it done." He instructed me.

He walked away leaving us unattended. My blood is nearly at freezing point if my heart hasn't stopped beating.

It's a trap. I just walked into a trap. Three men all with blades. I moved mine from my wrist, holding the metal without a handle steady.

"I don't want any trouble." I addressed prisoner 5935.

"Mancini wants you dead." He informed me.

Exactly... I played right into it. He will pit all his enemies against each other so that we do the dirty work for him. Just when they took the first step into an assault, Keith came in.

Shit! He's not supposed to be here.

"I'll take care he big guy." He offered.

"No I'll take the big guy." I countered.

We both raced for him. He picked him from the knees and raised him enough for me deliver a superman punch right to the face. When he was down, crashed against the shelves, Keith and I fought the other two. He knocked one out and I wrapped a towel around the other's face pulling hard enough to suffocate him to passing out. We faced the big guy together.

"Get out of here!" I told him. "You can't be caught up in this! Kei needs one of us!"

"I'm not leaving you." He told me.