Chapter 235

Rosewood Promises

The rain had cleared.

Like my apology had reached the heavens,

the sky had cleared up.

I opened the blinds

and let the fresh sunlight filter through,

lighting the room with a yellow blaze.

The trees were turning fiery-orange.

The sure sign of the coming winter.

Winter was a season that could be filled with cold dreary nights.

It could also be filled with heat and warmth,

as long as you are with the ones you love.

Every Christmas, Aoi and I would spend our time

near the window

watching the snow flutter down silently.

We would often fall asleep that way, warm in each other's arms.

How I missed her.

I knew I couldn't find her in anyone else.

Why was I trying? Nobody could replace her.

How would I spend my winter this year?

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Rosewood Promises

The presents on her table was exactly the way it had been the long night before.

Each exposed surface was slowly gathering a thin layer of dust.

I half-hoped she had woken up while I was gone and taken a look at all her gifts.

But nothing was moved.

Even the CD was still in the player.

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Rosewood Promises

Like the gifts, Aoi's world was untouched and still.

The room was quiet

and the usual hospital smell of sterile equipment

and chemical plastic filled my nose.

But instead my eyes fell upon a precious and tiny wooden box, perched high on the table.

It sat so humbly and quietly I could have missed it. I missed it so many times.

It was just waiting for its chance to sing once again.

When all the dust settled, when the time was right.

As a way of reminding me once again of her song.

Aoi had been waiting to hear it.

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Rosewood Promises

Clack. Clack. Clack.

I wound the box a few times,

letting my fingertips explore the tiny cube

like I just picked it up for the first time.

It was so light, it couldn't have been heavier than a feather.

The rosewood was smooth and polished,

the edges and corners rounded, little gold hinges along the lid.

When the box was wound tight, I set it on the table.

Slowly,

I opened the lid.

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Rosewood Promises

I closed my eyes.

Sitting here, it seemed like time stopped.

The sun's rays were frozen in its ever flowing motion,

the leaves outside were still, the cool breeze had paused.

They all bent in to listen.

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Rosewood Promises

The song began.

It softly caressed us, wrapping us with its wings.

The music was gentle yet powerful enough to send shivers up my spine.

The soft touch of it's music reminded me of Aoi in each and every way.

It didn't flood me with feelings or memories, nor was it forcing its way into my mind.

It was quiet and delicate,

slowly turning over memories in my head,

slowly letting me savour all our time together.

It was surprising that in such a small box,

it contained all of our memories together, our laughter, our tears.

I could sit here for years and let all the memories play back day by day.

But in a matter of seconds, my eyes began to well up with tears.

It felt like it has been such a long time since I've thought about her.

It felt like I had turned away from her.

How could I turn away from these kinds of feelings?

I felt like staying here for the rest of eternity.

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Rosewood Promises

Somehow it was a gentle and reflective experience.

It wasn't filled with pain.

Miraculously, this was what her song was about. This was her message.

It was filled with joy.

My tears came because of all the happy and sunny days that we saw together.

That I had the chance to share it with Aoi.

Was this what Aoi was thinking right now?

She was strong enough to smile through any pain and suffering.

She could sing songs to God even when it was hard.

When all of mankind would curse God and curse their life, she could sing.

Was this what I'm supposed to learn?

Listening to the music box,

I now knew everything would be fine.

All our worries washed away, all our pain disappeared.

What's important were the days we shared wasn't it?

What's important are the days ahead.

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Rosewood Promises

She composed the song just before high school.

I remember all the times I called and asked where she was

but she always replied that she was busy.

I got so worried I started wondering if she was seeing someone else.

The only time I caught a glimpse of the song

was when I knocked on her door one afternoon

and heard her piano from outside.

Her mother then called her to the door,

and Aoi came with a sheepish grin on her face.

I asked what she was doing and she fidgeted

in such a childlike way I forgot about my question.

That was the first and last time I heard it on the piano.

Until she gave me the music box, I forgot about that song.

She had been perfecting it the whole time.

I knew Aoi poured her heart into this song.

Somehow it wasn't until now that I once again opened it again.

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Rosewood Promises

When I opened my eyes, I heard the heartbeat monitor beeping.

As it had before, her heartrate had picked up.

I knew she was listening.

Aoi could always smile because she can always see the little orbs of light,

the golden harps, even in the darkness. There is never darkness, she said.

Because you can always find lights in the darkness.

As long as I paid close enough attention I can find those little bits of hope left.

Like the doctor had said, she will wake up.

When I become stronger, for her sake, she would wake up for mine.

It's a promise.