Chapter 244

A Story

There was a quiet knock at the door.

I turned around and got up from the stool I was sitting on.

Approaching the door cautiously, I couldn't help but wonder who it was.

Chapter 245

A Story

"Hisashiburi na."

Yuya was seated at Aoi's bedside now.

"Yeah, it's been a while."

"You've grown quite a bit, Seiji."

"How's that possible?"

I shook my head and laughed it off.

I haven't seen him in three months.

Chapter 246

A Story

There were rumours of him coming and going

but I never bumped into him.

Every now and then I would catch little things he left at Aoi's bedside,

little flowers, a new rough draft recording of his CD,

a pack of sweets from wherever he had just gone.

He was always on tour with his band, since his music career started picking up.

I heard their first album was coming out in a few weeks.

Within a few months, so many things have happened.

I had ask myself how I could keep going on like this

when Aoi wasn't moving at all.

It was as if we were all aging and not a single day passed for her in her frozen state.

I was leaving her behind.

Chapter 247

A Story

"Sorry I couldn't make it for sis's birthday yesterday."

"Nah it's okay. I'm sure she understands. You've been busy with the band." I smiled politely.

After such a long time, I didn't know what to say to him. I could only say courteous words.

When we were younger,

while he was still in university,

we hung out alot.

Every now and then he would take Aoi and I out for dinner

at a family restaurant and let us order anything on our minds.

In the summer, he took us on long trips like to Mount Fuji

or even further out, reaching Kyoto or Osaka.

I had come to love riding on the train across the country.

But as we all grew up and got busier, I barely talked to him.

Chapter 248

A Story

As he sat there in front of me now,

I was overwhelmed by all the times we had,

just like I always would be reminiscing in my memories with Aoi.

Thinking back now, he was the reason I got to know Aoi-chan.

His long hair was swept back now,

a few bangs falling over his face.

He was always the perfect balance between cool and friendly.

This year he was probably turning 26 now,

but his face was untouched by adulthood,

and he came across as only a few years older than us.

Every time I looked at his eyes however,

I was shocked by how old his eyes were.

That same amber in Aoi's eyes were completely different in her brother's.

Where Aoi's would glitter

with excitement and youthful joy,

his eyes shone steadily

with such mysterious depths and wisdom,

I could have sworn there was the spirit of an old man inside of him.

"How have you been doing?" He asked me, studying me with his old old eyes.

"I'm doing okay."

He paused. "I mean, how are you really doing?"

Chapter 249

A Story

His eyes pierced through me,

as if he could see everything that was going on in my mind.

I knew what he meant. But I couldn't bring my own gaze to meet his.

Truthfully, I haven't been doing well lately.

I fluttered back and forth in confusion

from being hopeful and faithful to despair and depression.

One second could bring me to high spirits in hoping Aoi would wake up,

the next could have me in tears swimming in lost memories.

The next moment I was eagerly distracted by something else.

And the next, I would be so tired I could walk away from my life and never return.

I remember the lyrics from the songs of that YUI album.

I remember Airu's words. I remember what my friends say.

I had to move on and be stronger. For my sake. For our sake.

But I had lost my path. I knew it.

Without Aoi, I didn't know where I was going.

I didn't know who I was.

There are so many things. I just didn't know where to begin to tell him.

Chapter 250

A Story

But Yuya didn't need my reply to know what I felt.

"Let me tell you of my own experience."

"Your experience?" I raised an eyebrow.

His eyes began to speak of a past memory.

Chapter 251

A Story

"In the last year of high school, I had a girlfriend."

He paused, recalling memories from somewhere that seemed so far away.

I somehow knew how he was feeling.

"She was the quietest girl ever. She cried at every little thing, like a delicate flower."

His eyes suddenly seemed to be watery.

I had never seen him like this before.

High school had to be at least nearly ten years ago.

She must have been so important to him.

I've never heard him talking about his past before.

He had always remained mysterious.

His past seemed so far off and so distant.

Yet it could bring him to tears.

Chapter 252

A Story

"My last year was blessed because I met her."

Yuya continued. "Just like you have been."

He stopped to look at Aoi before continuing.

"I used to be a deliquent, slacking off in school,

skipping classes and wandering aimlessly with friends.

I thought I would pick up chicks if I played guitar, so I learned it."

I could see years of memories swimming through his eyes,

playing back scene by scene. I could sense it.

Because that would happen with me too.

Somehow his words spoke directly into me.

Chapter 253

A Story

"She changed me though." He gave me a small smile.

"When I first met her, she was just another girl of my fan club.

But I felt the need to protect her.

Day by day, I got to know her, and she became irreplacable in my life."

"Then she would wake me up in the morning,

and get me to go to school on time.

We weren't even dating yet.

But somehow she saw that light in me.

My potential. She was unknowingly attracted to me, and I to her.

Of all the girls who dressed with the latest trends in fashion,

or hung out with all the guys, partying and clubbing till the night, she stood out.

A 'wild kid' like me should have never liked such a girl."

"She was the type of person who loved to help others, no matter how weak she was herself."

Chapter 254

A Story

"Does this sound familiar?"

"Huh?" I was surprised for a moment.

He completely saw me through. "Somewhat." I answered.

He nodded.

"It was in the winter when I confessed.

She got sick and I cried out in a loud voice that I would protect her for the rest of her life."

He chuckled softly. "She was moved to tears and the next day she got better."

"By the time I graduated high school,

I passed decently, thanks to her.

I even went and got a decent job.

She was always by my side, that girl, supporting me.

She encouraged me to chase after my dreams.

She gave me the strength to say I would get a job and try to become a musician in the future.

I tried to support her too, but little did I know that there were things that even I couldn't do."

"My story ended in tragedy though."

Chapter 255

A Story

Tragedy.

Was that the word to use to describe Aoi's situation?

To describe our relationship?

Then, he looked at me right in the eyes. His gaze shot through me. He was serious.

Looking back at his eyes, I saw a fire glowing inside. A fire I didn't seem to have.

It was the fire of a survivor.

"Let me tell you this. Listen closely to what happened, and what I'm about to say."

"My story may end in tragedy, but not yours."

"My story may have been a tragedy, but my story goes on."

"And still does."

"Do you understand what I'm saying?"

Chapter 256

A Story

I nodded.

My story was only beginning.

He nodded back, satisfied, before continuing.

"I got busier with my job, and I saw her less.

She came over in the mornings to give me a bento lunchbox she made,

at night she would come to fix me a dinner before returning.

And that was it. I didn't get to spend quality time with her."

"After a while, she disappeared from my life."

Chapter 257

A Story

He stopped, choking on painful memories.

"What?"

He breathed out at last and looked at me with painful eyes.

"It was my fault for not noticing.

I was too absorbed in my own world,

chasing after my dreams like she had said.

Constructing my future, or our future.

I did not once ask her how she was doing."

"A week later, after calling and emailing numerous times,

I went to her house wondering where she had gone.

No one answered the door. I thought they moved."

"I thought she had abandoned me all of a sudden."

"For two months I started returning to my old ways,

skipping work, getting drunk, losing myself in fights.

My guitar sat in the corner, untouched."

"It was two months after when I finally found out."

Chapter 258

A Story

"She had developed leukemia."

I sat there in shock.

What?

There was no way in the world something like that could happen to a girl who sounded so nice.

I can't believe that.

They sounded like they would be happy forever. They should be together forever.

Why was the world so cruel?

Chapter 259

A Story

"I went to visit her at the hospital and she was undergoing chemo."

"I didn't know what to think.. what to do.

To cry, or did I have to be strong for her?

Was I supposed to comfort her or just remain silent by her side? What do I say?"

"I was confused and for a while I couldn't get myself to go into her room.

When I finally did, she was shocked.

I thought she would hate me.

But it was the exact opposite.

She hid under her blanket and refused to see me and told me to leave.

I had to leave dejectedly, thinking I did something wrong,

but now that I think about it, she didn't want me to see her the way she was then."

"Knowing her, she thought she would bring me down and just disappeared from my life."

Chapter 260

A Story

"Time and time again I tried to visit but she wouldn't let me in the room.

Between the hospital door we both would break down into tears,

wondering why our fate was so cruel.

She yelled and screamed at me to leave her alone, and to live on with my life."

He was cradling his face in his hands now.

Pausing gingerly, hoping to cherish these memories.

I knew he could barely find the words to say all this. Still, I sat there quietly.

He continued, "Her parents and the nurses would literally force me out.

I was so confused, should I stand my ground and stay by her side?

Or maybe she needed to be left alone?

Then I received an email message from her,

which told me again to live on and move on with my life."

"Being foolish, that's what I did.

I decided I would come back when she got better.

She didn't want to see me so I had no choice but to leave."

"I should have known better.

That was the worst possible thing I could do.

To leave her side.

That is unforgivable."

Chapter 261

A Story

"She passed away shortly after."

He stopped.

For a good few minutes there was silence,

only the faint tick of the clock echoed around the room,

and Aoi's soft breathing was barely audible.

The starch white walls

surrounding the three of us

were gravely still,

listening to his memories.

His eyes were wet but he wasn't crying.

How many times had he cried then?

Chapter 262

A Story

Then he turned to look at me again.

"I never got to see her again."

"Because of my decision of leaving her side,

she passed away, lonely, helpless, and in pain.

I regret what I did to her.

I was too selfish".

"Imagine how hurt she must have been

when she told me to leave and to move on,

knowing full well that she would much rather have someone by her side,

as her life ebbed away.

As well as I knew her, I was foolish."

"I miss everything about her.

To this day I do. Her smile, her touch, her delicate ways."

"Do you understand what I'm saying?"

Chapter 263

A Story

"We as men, as the ones who aren't suffering, we are stronger, and we need to be strong."

"How much pain was she going through at that time? Physically, emotionally, spiritually."

"They're going through alot more than we are."

"So we have a responsibility.

You have to carry both your own burdens and Aoi's.

There's no time to break down and cry,

to linger in our own selfish feelings.

We have to live on for them.

To stand strong for them."

Chapter 264

A Story

"I made the mistake of not carrying both of our burdens.

Instead, I just turned away.

Yes, she told me to leave.

But there was no reason I should've done so.

I was weak. She needed me to stand by her.

Sometimes I wonder, maybe that I caused her death.

If I had remained by her side,

no matter what she said,

she might've eventually given in.

I could've helped her recover, helping her with my strength.

She would have had the will to live."

"We are carrying the burden for two. Stand firm, Seiji. Let Aoi be able to rely on you."

"The story only begins here.

We, as the living, continue on.

Until the day we die, we are living our lives,

and how will we live it?"