"does it bother anyone else that these women live in hooterville?" hyde asked as they were watching tv.

"technically, petticoat junction is down the track from hooterville." eric said.

"okay, does it bother anybody else that they live down the track from hooterville?" hyde asked.

"it bothers me that they bathe in the town water tank." donna said.

"with the dog." kelso said.

"yeah, that's just nasty." isabella said.

"it isn't the drinking water. it is the water for the train." jackie argued.

"your point?" isabella asked.

"it's still three naked women with a dog." donna said.

"i want to be the hooterville dog." fez said as donna glared at him.

"yoo hoo! coming down. now don't mind me. i'm just putting some clothes in." kitty said coming downstairs with a laundry basket.

"eric, honey... i thought you could wear this on your birthday. it's nice. you look so handsome in it." kitty said.

"why would i want to dress nice on my birthday?" eric asked.

"its your birthday?" kelso asked.

"oh, you never know what's going to happen on your birthday." kitty replied.

"mom... mom, do not throw a party for me." eric told her.

"oh, well, listen to mr. popularity. like i have time to plan you a party." kitty said with a laugh.

"oh, um, by the way... uh, your sister, laurie, is coming home from college for the weekend. no special reason. she just is." kitty said before going back upstairs.

"well, you're getting a party. and best of all, it's a surprise." donna said.

"yeah, who could've seen that one coming?" isabella joked.

"i just realized, donna's older than you." kelso said to eric.

"only by a month." donna replied.

"good for you, eric." fez said tapping him on the shoulder.

"good for me, what?" eric asked him.

"in my country... it is good luck to fall in love with an older woman." fez said.

"fez... fez." eric said trying to get him to stop talking.

"oh, boy." isabella said.

"no, they come with livestock." fez replied.

-

isabella was sitting at the table with her family. they were having breakfast all together.

"i'm going over to eric's after breakfast. his mom is throwing him a surprise party tomorrow." isabella said while her mom passed her a plate of pancakes.

"did you get him a gift?" mary asked her daughter.

"yeah, i think he's gonna love it." isabella replied.

"oh, good. eric is a nice boy." mary replied.

"bryan, how's football going?" david asked his son.

"good." bryan replied vaguely.

"you're not getting distracted by any girls are you? you can't let them affect your chance at a football scholarship." david said as bryan rolled his eyes.

"no, dad. but, on a totally unrelated note, i will be hanging out with laurie forman this weekend. you know, just because we haven't seen each other in forever." bryan replied.

isabella couldn't help but feel disgusted. she knew laurie could never just be friends with a guy.

she was sure that her brother and laurie had been hooking up since bryan was in grade 10.

-

isabella, jackie and donna were leaning against eric's car while watching the boys play basketball.

"so." jackie said looking at donna.

"what?" donna asked.

"what are you going to get eric for his birthday?" jackie asked.

"i don't know. nothing seems right. i want to give him something special." donna said.

"don't worry, donna, i'm sure he love whatever you get him." isabella said.

"he kissed you!" jackie shouted making donna shush her.

"get in the car. girls, get in the car so we can talk." jackie said.

the three of them got into the car and the others looked at donna.

"okay, what happened?" jackie asked.

"jackie, i'm not gonna talk to you guys about this." donna said.

"oh, come on." isabella said.

"then who are you gonna talk to?" jackie asked.

they looked over at the guys and saw them making fart noises with their arms.

"okay. we get home from the rundgren concert and i. sitting on the hood of the car, and i kissed him." donna said.

"this is so exciting!" isabella said.

"french or american?" jackie asked.

"i can't believe i'm talking to you guys about this." donna said.

then they watched the guys drag fez away by holding him up by his underwear.

"okay, so... look, i've lived next door to eric my entire life and we talk about everything together. we love the same music, we love the packers. then i kissed him, and everything changed. now i don't know if he's my boyfriend or best friend. if he's my boyfriend i'd lose my best friend. and if i screw it up, i lose my best friend and my boyfriend. now i have to get him this gift and i don't know-" donna rambled.

"donna, donna! i've solved it. get him a scented candle." jackie said.

"a scented candle?" donna asked.

"i don't know, jackie." isabella said.

"it's practical and romantic. oh, yeah." jackie said.

-

when isabella went home for dinner she sat down and they saw bryan come in a little later than he usually was.

"so, bryan. how's laurie?" their father asked him.

"not pregnant if that's where you're going." bryan said making isabella almost choke on her water.

"son, don't say that. not in front of your mother." david replied.

"it's okay, mi amor. at least we know they're just hanging out." mary said as bryan groaned.

"yeah, right." isabella taunted as bryan glared at her.

"shut up." bryan told her.

"make me." isabella replied.

"like you and freddy are so innocent." bryan said making david glare at his children.

"that's enough." david said as the table went silent.

isabella was hoping her parents never had to find out that she lost her virginity to freddy after one of their first few dates.

sure it wasn't for most romantic thing since it was in the back of his car but she still enjoyed it. she liked freddy enough that it didn't matter.

-

"look, i know what you're all doing here." eric told the gang.

"what are you talking about, man? we're just hanging out. like always. except we're dressed nice. but that doesn't mean anything." kelso said before isabella punched him in the arm.

"hi, kids. um... i need your help with something. jackie, donna, isabella, michael, steven... young man with an accent, could you give me a hand? not you, eric." kitty said as everyone followed her upstairs.

they set everything up and eric knew it was inevitable. he got a party. it was time for eric to come and open his gifts.

"wow. i mean, yeah." eric said.

"it's an eight track tape player." kitty told him.

"the thing he specifically told her he didn't want." isabella whispered to hyde making him grin.

"i see that." eric replied.

"just what you asked for." red said.

"you made such a big deal about it, i wrote it down." kitty said.

they moved to the couch so eric could open the other gifts.

"cassettes. great. thanks, hyde." eric said.

"you're welcome." hyde replied.

"oh! let's put them in the eight track and play them." kitty said.

kitty cut the cake and hyde went to get up and get some.

"hey, get me some cake, stevey." isabella said.

"sure." hyde said.

"hey, it's a hot shave dispenser." eric said.

"oh, he won't need that for a long time. a long, long time." kitty said.

"of course he will. he's almost like a man." midge said making kitty tear up and midge hugged her.

hyde came back into the room and passed isabella a slice of cake.

"thanks." she said with a smile.

"no problem, bella." he replied sitting next to her.

"i got you something." donna told eric.

"no. donna, help me find my purse... now!" jackie said dragging her away.

"okay, it's time we disappeared." red said.

"what? honey, honey, the party just started." kitty told him.

"i know. that's why we're going over to bob's." red said.

"well, i wanted to give eric a party." kitty replied.

"and you did. you make a mess, you're all grounded." red said with a chuckle.

"you darn kids." bob said before leaving.

"well, you know, what if they run out of ketchup or something." kitty said.

"let's go." red told her.

"okay. well, we have more buns and, uh, sweet pickles if you don't like the dills." kitty said.

"okay, i'd love to stay, but i'm leaving." laurie said.

"hey, buy us some beers? we'll pay double." eric told her.

"do you really think that beer will make your little party better?" laurie asked.

"yes." all the boys said making isabella laugh.

"i admit it would give you young people a sense of maturity... but it would be a false maturity, and that would be wrong." laurie said.

"so you're not going to do it?" eric asked.

"of course not. now, i'm going off to join my legal friends at a party with a keg. bye." laurie said walking to the door.

kelso went and ran after laurie making isabelle roll her eyes.

"eric, can i talk to you in the den?" isabella asked him.

"yeah." eric replied before they went into the den.

"what did you wanna talk about?" eric asked his best friend.

"happy birthday." isabella said passing him the gift she had wrapped.

eric smiled and he opened the gift. once he saw what it was, he smiled widely.

"a limited edition g.i. joe?" eric said as isabella nodded.

"i figured to give it to you away from everyone so hyde wouldn't make fun of you." isabella said as the two of them laughed.

"this is why we're best friends." eric said before pulling isabella into a hug.

isabella got pulled away from eric by jackie and she was dragged into the kitchen where donna already was.

"what's happening?" isabella asked.

"i'm gonna give eric his gift." donna replied.

"wait on the porch, and we'll get eric." jackie said.

"it's dark out there." donna said.

"and you're giving him a candle. yeah. here, matches." jackie said passing them to donna.

"he might not want to light it." donna said.

"of course he will." isabella said.

"don't say that. don't even think it. now, when he opens it, he'll say cool or something. and then you give him a look like this." jackie said.

isabella watched jackie tilt her head and show a pouty face while blinking really fast.

"oh, boy." isabella said while looking at donna.

donna went out on the porch and jackie and isabella went back to the living room. all the boys were sitting there together.

"oh, eric. donna's on the porch." jackie told him.

"he's getting the big gift!" kelso said shaking eric.

"kelso, shut up." isabella told him.

everyone was watching eric and donna out on the porch after they were out there alone.

"this is it. he's going for it." jackie said.

"oh, no. it's his birthday, she should kiss him first." kelso said.

"she did last time." jackie said.

"what?" the boys said.

"jackie!" isabella shouted.

"nothing. shut up and watch." jackie said.

"come on, forman. go for it." hyde said.

"the doors open we can hear you. we can see you." eric said as everyone ducked.

"is he kissing her?" fez asked.

"none of us can see them, fez." hyde told him.

"eric, are you kissing her?" fez shouted before donna closed the screen door.