"Y/n... what are you doing?" My body freezes. I don't know what to do, I feel as though I'm either going to faint or be sick. My knees becoming weak and my head heavy. I stand there blankly looking at Yoongi who is staring back. His face in complete shock and disbelief.

"Yoongi..I.... It's not what it looks like" I drop the blade in the sink and my legs give out. I fall to the ground with a large thump, blood everywhere.

"Y/n!" Yoongi runs towards me instantly dropping beside me.

"Here, let me help you" He grabs a wet cloth and wipes away the blood wrapping up my thigh as he does so. He then proceeds to pick me up and carry me to the couch placing me down gently.

"Yoongi I'm sorry" I burst out crying and I try to hide my face. I don't know if it's because he caught me or the fact that I did it in the first place. He lifts my body up pulling away my arms from my face and wraps his arms around me.

"It's okay, you don't have to apologise" He says softly into my ear causing my breathing to becomes existent again so I calm down.

"I'm really trying, it's just so hard" I say as I sob into his shoulder.

"I know, I know. You're doing your best, that's all I can ask for" Yoongi pulls away from me.

"All I do is make you feel miserable. Maybe Jin was right, maybe you shouldn't see me anymore"

"No! Not even for one second you think that. It's not true, none of this is your fault y/n"

I start to feel a little better.

"I was thinking maybe I should go and apologise to Jin and Tae. I feel horrible for what I did and now it's affecting you. I feel responsible, I'm supposed to be making you happy, I can't do that if all I do is cause conflict"

"You don't cause conflict Yoongi but yes I think apologising is the right thing to do even if it wasn't completely your fault"

"Will you come with me?"

"Of course I'll come with you. I'll be with you every step of the way"

The two of us stand there at the entrance to the dorms. I look over to Yoongi, he looks petrified, nervous and scared all at the same time if that's even possible. His face pale and eyes blank. I hold his hand thinking that it will calm him down. He looks over to me, staring deeply into my eyes.

"It will be okay" I quietly say. He nods his head and takes a deep breath in and out. He opens the door and the two of us walk inside. All six boys sit there quietly on the couch talking amongst each other, that quickly changes when Yoongi and I enter the room.

"Yoongi!" They all shout.

"H-hey I'm back"

Jin is the first to get up running over to the two of us. His wraps his arms tightly around Yoongi.

"I'm so sorry Yoongi" He starts crying and Yoongi does the same.

"No it's my fault Jin. I'm so so so sorry. You are my family, I shouldn't have yelled at you like that and then disappeared for so long"

"I was so scared. I didn't know what I was going to do if you didn't come back"

The two boys stand there for a while holding each other. Jin's large and broad body taking all of Yoongi's small body in, like a mother holding her small child. After Jin and Yoongi are finished he then walks over to Tae who sits there quietly.

"Tae, I'm sorry for what I said to you" he looks surprised.

"Oh, it's okay Yoongi. You don't need to apologise, I was also in the wrong. I should apologise as well. Sorry Y/n, it was insensitive of me to do what I did to you, please forgive me."

"It's fine Tae, I know you were just trying to help"

We all smile, the conflict is resolved. But ah it doesn't last for long.

"Y/n.. why is your leg bandaged?" Jimin suddenly exclaims. All seven pairs of eyes are locked onto my thigh making me a little uncomfortable. Yoongi senses the tension coming from me and quickly reacts.

"She accidentally burnt her leg this morning while cooking. I bandaged it up for her" As he says this he steps hard on Jimin foot causing him to scream a little.

"Y-yeah that's what happened" I look over to Yoongi and mentally thank him.

"Wait! Yoongi was with you this morning, and let me guess last night as well?" Hoseok blurts out.

"Yeah he was. Is there something wrong with that?" I blankly ask.

"Oh no reason" Hoseok and Jungkook laugh together looking over to Yoongi who is red as a tomato.

I look down at my phone, it quite late now.

"Sorry everyone, I have to leave now. I have worksheets I need to prepare for my students for tomorrow"

"Noooo don't leave us" Jimin whines.

"She has to go, she's a busy woman" Yoongi suddenly says. I blush at the thought of him calling me a woman.

They walk me to the door. I say my goodbyes and walk home, listening to music as I do so.

"So did you confess to her yet?" Jimin suddenly asks.

"Of course he didn't" Jungkook buts in.

"I will... eventually" He says quietly.

"Sure sure"

"Don't laugh at me Hobi, I'm just not ready yet"

"Yep that's what they all say"

"Leave him alone" Namjoon says, pushing Hoseok away.

Namjoon and Tae pull Yoongi away from the other boys, they look concerned and sad.

Tae speaks first. "Those bandages on Y/n's leg, they weren't an accident right? She did it to herself"

"Y-yeah. I caught her while she was doing It" Yoongi's eyes turning low.

"What do you mean you caught her?"

"It means I walked into the bathroom as she was slicing the side of her thigh. That's what I mean when I caught her Namjoon" He says annoyed.

The three boys look down at the ground. "What are we all going to do. It can't keep going on like this"

"Tae's right Yoongi. Maybe she should start getting professional help"

"It's her choice but yes I agree. Do you think she would be open to it?"

"Your the only one who can ask her that Yoongi. She trusts you the most, more than anyone else"

"I won't ask her yet. Not until things have calmed down a bit"

The other two nod in agreeance. As they do so Jimin walks past and tries to join in on the conversation.

"Why did you step on my foot earlier Yoongi? It hurt a lot"

"Because you're an idiot and can't take a hint"

"Namjoon! Yoongi is being mean to me"

"Sorry Jimin but I have to agree with Yoongi this time. We have to start being more careful about what we say around Y/n. She isn't well and we want her to start getting better. So the way we speak is the first step to helping her"

"Fine I'm sorry, I'll be careful from now on"

I walk down the lonely streets of Seoul, tall buildings beside me. Cars parked on either side along with a few trees here and there, we could always do with a few more trees. There seems to be only a few people around which is comforting but eerie I guess. My earphones blasting Stray Kids, Day6 and of course BTS songs. My mind feels clear although there are a few lingering thoughts that don't seem to go away.

Useless. Stupid. Pathetic.

I push them away, the music drowning them out. I continue to walk, my thigh aching. I reach the entrance to my apartment and quickly rush into my room beginning to write up worksheets for my students tomorrow. I sit there for a few hours and still I listen to music. My head becoming heavy and my eyes tired as each hour passes, it needs to be done though. I push forward to finally my last worksheet is done. I look over to the clock, 10:30pm. Suddenly as I try to stand up there is a sharp pain in my leg, I fall back down. Tears escaping my eyes and the dark thoughts coming in stronger and stronger.

Stupid. No one loves you. Just leave forever. Yoongi doesn't like you. You cause conflict. Everyone hates you. It's why they left you all alone, it's because your you. Just kill yourself.

Cut... cut... cut.. CUT! CUT! CUT ! CUT!

"SHUT UP!" I scream at the top of my lungs falling to the ground. Uncontrollably I cry laying on the floor. My thigh now bleeding again due to the sudden impact as I hit the ground.

"Please stop. Why is life so hard? Why is everything so hard? Why can't I do better, why am I me?" I say to myself. I try to stand up, blood seeping through the bandage running down my leg. My first initial thought is to go straight to the bathroom to make it worse but before I can do so my phone buzzes. It's Yoongi.

Hey y/n. I just wanted to quickly say

thank you for helping me today. I

really mean it thank you. You make

me feel strong and so happy. I really

appreciate everything you do for me.

I know you're really struggling but you

don't need to be because you're strong

and brave and a kind person. Sorry if I

sound sappy but I really mean it.

Thank you

I grip tightly onto my phone. I may be crying but I'm not sad, I'm even smiling. Everything that was consuming my mind is suddenly gone. I feel better and it's all because of Yoongi. Maybe I do love that boy.

"What are you smiling about?" Hoseok ask as Yoongi lays there on his bed staring deeply at his phone.

"Huh? Oh nothing Hoseok, I'm just talking to Y/n"

"Cute" He walks off smiling leaving the happy Yoongi by himself.

"I love you Y/n" he quietly says to himself.

Actually so proud of this chapter.