《The Man Between The Pages {Jikook} [completed]》~ Signs of a sociopath ~
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''And in my heart you dance, secretly
endlessly when nobody is able to see.
Sometimes I just want you.
Not your kisses or touches.
Not long talks and sweet nothings.
Just you. Next to me. Just us.
People should stop believing in sociopaths
and start believe in love.
Love is the one who can save us.
Love and only love.
Especially when cupid hits us both''.
disliked his storage room so freaking bad and quite frankly, he hoped Jungkook wasn't going to ask him much about it.
''Jimin...What's that?'' the curious younger wondered and pointed at the mahogany door.
''Storage room. You know brooms, tools, things that you don't want to have out in the open'' Jimin explained.
Jungkook was wondering when it's the right time to leave but he never delved deeper into the topic. He just sat there observing the older's lips describing stories and narrating his life as if it was a fairytale. Until Jimin clapped his hands in front of his eyes waking him up from his trance.
''What?''.
''You were daydreaming...Who were you daydreaming of?'' he asked with a smirk.
''Taehyung'' Jungkook retorted.
''Were you daydreaming of Taehyung? I knew something was going on between you two guys''.
''No, no! I meant...Have you talked to Taehyung after that night you came to my place?'' he questioned. This was actually one of the queries he had. The two men looked extremely friendly for a duo that had spoken only a couple of times.
''No, not really. I mean he is a great guy and all but I didn't give him a call. He didn't call me either. Why are you asking though?''.
''No reason in particular. He had told me that you are quite unapproachable''.
''I am...most of the time at least. People in town aren't so...well, how am I supposed to say this? They aren't my type. We don't have the same interests or opinions and sometimes I don't like that. But if I find someone that I quite like then I can be pretty extroverted'' he muttered, placing a thumb on his lips, wiping the remaining drops of the tea that was lingering on his lips.
''Extroverted to what extent?''.
''To the extent of inviting someone to my place'' Jimin grinned and after excusing himself, he walked to the kitchen to wash the mugs. During this time, Jungkook was trying to figure out what was going on in Jimin's head. Damn, he would love to have the chance to hear people's thoughts. Scratch that. Not everyone's. Only Park Jimin's.
The man's mind seemed to be refined, a genteel vagary of whimsical wild yet simultaneously an inviting tranquility filled with innovative ideas. Jungkook could feel a strong attraction to the man and just knowing that he can control his moves brought a sort of ascendancy to the younger male.
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Jimin was a selcouth creature, an elysian piece of humanity in a world filled with countless similarities. The way he spoke faster than a common person, the way his fashion choices were so elegant in contrast to the other people of the city, the way he spoke about books and literature, his well-intentioned obsession with cleaning...
Jungkook found him too endearing. Yet the paragraphs in his book described him utterly and completely on a different hue.
He had tracked down some salient habits of the older such as the way he sat or expressed himself. Now that he was thinking about it, Jungkook knew Jimin well enough. Despite the insufficient discussion and the little time they had spent together, the raven haired knew details of the blond man's life that his own friends had never talked about.
He knew his habits, his favorite books, he was now sitting on his sofa...He knew the man's kinks for God's sake!
''Sorry for this...It's just that if I left the cups unwashed, grounds would stick on the bottom and I hate that...You must think of me as a fucking weirdo''.
''Are you kidding? I have a fear of the left sides! There's nothing weirder than that...Oh, your phone is ringing'' Jungkook picked up Jimin's phone and handed it over to him. For a second, his eyes got a glimpse of the man's caller, only a mere question mark appearing on the screen.
''Thank you'' Jimin mumbled and answered the call.
''Hi...Yes...No, at least not yet...You must be joking'' the man replied and Jungkook tried to avert his gaze elsewhere. Jimin didn't look intense but his words were surely giving off a convoluted sentiment.
''I did...For the last time yes!...Fine...Don't tell me what to do!'' Jimin spoke as calmly as he could and ended the call, shoving the phone in his pocket.
''Is everything alright Jimin?''.
''Oh yeah, don't worry about it'' he reassured him with a small grin on his face.
Walking back inside his residence, Jungkook's amber eyes scanned the living room carefully. Everything was in order yet the man sensed an odd feeling...as if he was being watched. As if someone had entered his house while he was absent. There were no trails of trespassing, a clear sign that Jungkook was just imagining things...when he remembered that he didn't find his key on the usual spot the other day.
Maintaining a placid expression, Jungkook ran out of his living room and stopped in front of his entrance. Quickly shoving his hand inside the soil of his flower pot, the raven haired noticed that his key was still there, on the exact place he has been leaving this all this time. Yet oddly, Jungkook didn't feel relieved...
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''What the hell are you doing?'' a low pitched voice echoed in his ears causing him to flinch from surprise.
''Taehyung?'' he asked, placing a hand on his chest where his heart was ready to escape his torso.
''The one and only...What the fuck are you doing?'' he repeated his question. Paradoxically, Jungkook felt like he had to lie to the older. They were friends and apparently Taehyung trusted him...still Jungkook wanted to lie to him.
''I don't like this jardinière...I should haul the plant off to another flower pot'' he exclaimed and wiped his hands with a cloth.
''I came to see how you've been...You didn't even answer my calls'' he complained and fixed the beanie on his head.
''I was really busy Tae'' he claimed with his palms brushing together.
''Busy writing or thinking about a man named Park Jimin?'' he rolled his eyes and put his hands on his hips.
''What the hell are you saying? You know how things are...I am driving myself insane'' Jungkook retorted, unable to comprehend Taehyung's sudden change of behavior.
''You like him, don't you? You have seen him...like three or four times yet you actually like him? That's so facile'' he commented and followed Jungkook in his living room.
''Why do you even care? You don't even know him''.
''Cause apparently you do?'' he retorted back, a question dripping sarcasm.
''Hadn't it been me, you wouldn't even care for his existence Taehyung. And yes I do know him''.
''Oh fuck me Jungkook. Just be happy I helped cause you knew shit'' Taehyung raised his voice.
''I know everything about him! I am controlling him, I can dominate him...I can fucking manipulate him if I want to'' he yelled and pushed the blond with all his strength, his back becoming on with the wall behind him.
''You are talking like a fucking sociopath! That's why you are attracted to him? Because you can control him? Shame on you Jungkook!'' Taehyung spat on the younger's face and Jungkook wiped his cheek with the hem of his sleeve.
''Leave Taehyung. Don't make this worse'' he pleaded. ''I didn't mean what I said, you know that''.
''You must love to be manipulative, huh? Is this why you dumped Hoseok? Because you allowed him to fuck you from behind and you are afraid to admit it?'' he mocked the younger and in an instant Jungkook's fist collided with the older boy's jaw.
Jungkook took a few steps backwards in an attempt to realize what he had done. The blond placed his index on his lip and wiped his lips tasting his own blood. With a fraught gaze, Taehyung grabbed the doorknob of the exit door and ran out of the residence, neglecting Jungkook's voice which was dropping apology after apology.
The author walked back inside with tears running from his eyes knowing that he had just lost a friend...and his friendship list wasn't big. He threw himself on his armchair trying to minimize the intense beating of his heart. Contemplating if Taehyung was wrong or right, Jungkook opened his laptop and began to type letter after letter.
''How to dissever a sociopath. Signs and characteristics''.
Deep inside in his heart, Jungkook knew that the words he blundered earlier wasn't his real self. Of course he didn't want to manipulate the man yet he unwillingly managed to do that while writing a monologue about him. And if something was ever going to happen between them Jungkook knew he would never try to harm him or patronize him. That's when he made a promise to himself; never say anything to Jimin. Neither about the book nor the fact that he is the one and only character.
Opening the first tablet, Jungkook attempted to affiliate his own personality with the signs on the screen.
1] Superficial charm.
People always told him that he was attractive, an effortless beauty in a world where everybody tried to look their best. He could have anyone with a flip of his finger yet he always tried to captivate his lovers with his ...charm. No, no, this couldn't be it. Being alluring doesn't make you a sociopath.
2] Untruthful and manipulative.
Blinking his eyes, Jungkook realized how many lies he has been rattling out all this time. He lied to Taehyung about the jardinière, to that waiter- Namjoon if he recalls correctly- when he asked him about Jimin. He even lies to Jimin all this time...however he doesn't do it willingly. These little lies weren't significant, these lies were harmless. And he wasn't manipulating anyone...at least not with a malicious preposition.
3] Dominative. At all costs.
Taehyung had just told him off for that. And no matter what he read or how many times he read it, Jungkook could find these traits in his own personality. He couldn't be a sociopath, this is the silliest thing he has ever thought off...
But as time passed, this thought made its way on his brain. And it planned to stay there...
In a world where real sociopaths were exloiting him, Jungkook thought of himself as one.
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