''Keep you face towards the sun.

You will avoid the scary shadows, 

you wil escape scimachy.

For a little while...

Cause the dark umbra may be hiding in your heart.

You might not realize it yet

but it will surface.

It might be your madness, your literal doom.

Unless, there's a light emerging from within...''.

two weeks later

sluggish footsteps Jungkook exited the super market. Carrying three bags filled with coffee, groceries and meat, the young author checked the watch on his wrist. Winter had still a big momentum to the point that Jungkook- a man who barely felt the crisp- wanted to cover his hands with a woolen pair of gloves. The moon looked gloomy and the sky decided to allow the stars to sleep early. It was only eight-thirty yet the familiar black veil had already dressed the village.

Ravenous and parched, Jungkook increased his speed, the soles of his feet harassing the calming puddles. Having embraced the virtue of oblivescence, he was walking with a sly grin on his face, feeling that finally his life would change. Despite the fact that he was a selenophile, the young man really wanted to get back to his place, make himself a cup of coffee and give a call to Park Jimin. 

Yet he felt so uneasy. As if his house was further than before. As if the bags he was carrying were heavier than the previous times. As if somebody was following him persistently.

Looking slightly dejected, the raven haired writer stopped in the middle of the pavement. With hawk-like eyes Jungkook scanned the silent city lights, a sense of unwelcomed fear and utter trepidation making their way to his head. He has done this plenty of times, why was he so frightened now? Being utterly solivigant- or so he would like to believe- Jungkook cursed himself for not taking his car. 

Knowing that everything took place in the deepest abyss of his imagination, Jungkook unlocked the door of his abode and stormed inside, removing the key from the lock afterwards. He had always been strong and muscular, ready to face any unwelcoming visitor yet this situation seemed different. This predicament must have happened in his head.

Quickly placing his supplies in the fridge and the wooden cupboards, Jungkook decided not to invite Jimin to his place. Not because he didn't want to give the pleasure to himself of experiencing Jimin's soothe voice again but due to the fact that he didn't want to let him cross the streets alone. Even if the blond used his car, Jungkook would still be afraid. He had to be deprived of Park Jimin today.

That's if the said blond hadn't called.

Perplexed in alexithymia, contemplating if he should confide his fears in Jimin, the man picked up his phone, fiddling with his hoop earrings.

''Jimin''.

''Pizza. My place. I give you half an hour'' the blond uttered yet Jungkook couldn't find a way to respond. How do you say no when you badly want to say yes?

''I don't think I can come tonight Jimin. It's freezing outside'' he tried to find a good excuse yet the loud chuckles from Jimin proved that he must have failed miserably.

''Wear something warm and join me. I have a fireplace as well in case you have forgotten'' he spoke.

''I just feel a little sick that's all'' Jungkook lied.

''Really? Do you want me to come to your place? Maybe I'll help...''.

''No!'' Jungkook interrupted the twenty five year old's sentence.

''Okay, relax. I am just worried that's all. Just pl...just take care of yourself, okay?'' Jimin questioned worriedly.

''Jimin, wait!'' the man shouted and Jimin's phone almost slipped his grip.

''What?''.

''I will be there'' he laughed. Damn, the man had such a big effect on him...

''I should have become a lawyer. I can be pretty fucking convincing'' Jimin muttered, receiving a loud laugh from the younger. ''I will be waiting, bye Kook''.

''Bye Jimin-ah''.

''You look scared Kook'' Jimin stated when he saw the author hesitantly making his way in the apartment. 

''What? No'' Jungkook muttered. ''I brought beer'' he added. 

It was funny, a complicated paradox. Jungkook wanted to write a whole paragraph about how Park Jimin was going to hate drinking beer yet he never had the chance to do that.

''Great, I love beer!'' Jimin smiled and grabbed the bag from Jungkook's hands.

This meant that Jungkook's thoughts didn't matter. He had to write them down in order to come alive. However, this was in the past. No more monologues. Especially for Park Jimin.

''Did you make the pizza or not? Cause if you did, I'd better not grab a bite'' Jungkook teased the older. The blond opened the bottles with a smirk and quickly drank a sip of the bitter liquid. The stain of beer lingered on his lips, disappearing in an instant the moment Jimin's tongue rolled over his lips.

''I ordered it actually. You should have seen the delivery boy...He must have been wearing at least three jackets and two pairs of pants'' Jimin uttered and served himself a slice of pizza. Jungkook wondered if both of them were ordering from the same pizzeria yet this was such a minor detail that didn't need questioning.

It was that moment that Jungkook noticed the bright, loden necklace hanging from the man's neck. The piece of jewelry was rather fetching, an egocentric artifact decorating a prettier masterpiece. Of course Jungkook would never wear something like that...It drew too much attention and he didn't really want that. 

''Why did you lie to me?'' Jimin asked all of the sudden.

''I certainly did not''.

''I am a great story teller Kook, you said it yourself. You said you were sick yet you are here'' he stated with a benign tone.

''I thought someone was following me, alright? I wanted to invite you at my place but I didn't want you to cross the street alone'' he admitted. 

''Oh Kook! What if it was just your imagination?'' he retorted. ''Well... Did you have this feeling this time?''.

''No...Not really...I must have a very vivid imagination considering that this sciamachy never left my mind'' he rubbed his forehead.

''I just noticed that you are sitting on the left side of the couch'' Jimin changed the subject sensing the discomfort of the younger.

'' Are you for real?'' Jungkook sighed.

''I am just saying'' Jimin raised his hands up in surrender.

''I told you a hundred times Jimin-ah! I am not scared of everything...I just don't prefer my trinkets and books and decorations on the left side'' he rolled his eyes.

''I am messing with you Kook. Besides I have fears myself'' he wiped his mouth with a napkin.

''Spill the tea Park Jimin''.

''I have fears of dirty places. I should seriously come to your place and clean all the rooms and blow the dust off of the furniture. And finally all the left shelves will be clean'' he concluded with a smile.

''But you are dirty yourself'' Jungkook mumbled. It's from these moments when your mind stops working yet your mouth continues talking probably blubbering nonsense.

''Excuse me?'' the blond inquired almost chocking on his beer.

''This sounded so fucking wrong...I am sorry!'' the younger apologized after realizing how provocative his sentence was.

''I mean you aren't completely wrong, you just changed the subject so fast I wasn't able to comprehend the transition'' Jimin explained himself. It was now the time for Jungkook to choke.

''Friends aren't supposed to have these type of conversations Jimin!''.

''I am up for it if you are'' Jimin folded his hands on his lap.

Not only Jungkook found the situation incredibly comfortable, he also wouldn't mind knowing more about Park Jimin's previous relationships. He remembered Taehyung's words- how Jimin could be all sweet and lovely yet a complete different person if you threw him on a bed-. But for a brief second Jungkook travelled a little back on time, reminiscing his own notes. He wanted Jimin to have a troubled past...a past that hurt him yet he managed to overcome it. A past that turned him into a numb machine and gradually turned him into human again. 

Jungkook had written that paragraph so it must be true. Jimin must have experienced an ugly past, was he willing to talk about it though?

Leaving the relationships topic aside, Jungkook decided to grab the helm and control the discussion.

''Jimin-ah...How come you have never spoken about your parents?''.

''Oh...umm...I don't have parents. I have never met them. I grew up in an orphanage you see'' he smiled and bit his bottom lip.

''I am so sorry for asking you this...''.

''You apologize too much Kook and I hate that. It's a normal question which I answered. You have told me about your dad so you should know about my family as well. I have come to terms with the situation. I mean I learnt how to be independent way before the other kids my age. I have always been doing everything myself and look where I am now. I am sufficiently happy, I don't need to be reminded of that'' he muttered and quite frankly Jungkook observed that Jimin's eyes weren't sad and gloomy. They were shining with their usual chestnut color as always.

''My mother died a month after I released my book. Car accident. My father left the house because he couldn't bear the pain of staying in the place his wife died. I have the tendency to hold onto people not objects therefore I am fine staying there'' he exclaimed.

''Death is all around us, huh?'' Jimin whispered.

''Some people are obsessed with death Jimin'' he noted ''Oh shit! The pizza is here and I still haven't grabbed a piece'' the raven haired whined yet his eyes filled with uneasiness when he saw Jimin staring at the floor with no expression whatsoever.

''It depends on what you are obsessed with. Death and pizza are two completely different things. Try to prefer the latter''.

*sciamachy= fighting an invisible enemy, a shadow.