~~ y/n's pov ~~

we all shoved our stuff into george's tiny car and climbed in. nick took a blurry photo of all 4 of us in the car and posted it without any caption. as george drove off i scrolled through the replies, laughing as everyone freaked out and made theories.

the car ride was fairly uneventful, we all just caught up and told our travel stories. right as george has spilled his drink on the girl next to him, we arrived at the apartment complex. it was right on the outskirts of downtown LA, but away from all the traffic.

as we got our stuff out of the car, my nervousness came back again. standing outside my new home was surreal, just another reminder of the insane choice i had just done.

"oh um.. one minor detail by the way. the apartment is very nice but... there's only 3 bedrooms." clay said as we started into the building and the others all looked at me.

"I AM NOT SHARING. ABSOLUTELY NOT." i said as loudly as i could without causing a scene.

"are you sureeee y/n? it could be fun" nick said and i groaned in annoyance.

"i am flexible in a lot of things but that's a strong no. i get my own room."

the boys finally agreed and we headed up the elevator. out of the corner of my eye i saw george whispering something to clay, something clay obviously didn't like. he gave george a strong punch to the shoulder and george grinned wildly. i didn't think too much of it, but i laughed at george's response. we got off the elevator and found our door.

clay took the keys and unlocked the door, pushing it wide open. as i stepped into the main room, gasps and sounds of approval came from all of us.

the main room was big, with glass sliding doors leading out to an impressive balcony. there were two hallways on opposite sides of the room, and a kitchen to our left as we entered. peering down one hallway i saw 3 doors, presumably 2 bedrooms and a bathroom. that meant the other side had the single room, so i raced down it and shut the door behind me. i heard annoyance from the boys but i stopped in my tracks as the door shut. my jaw fell as i took in my new bedroom.

the wall i was facing had a window stretching its entirety with a simple sill, showcasing the city skyline. the walls were a light grey but with the midafternoon sun starting to come through, it was plenty bright. the view was breathtaking to say the least, and i could only imagine how magnificent this room could be once i moved everything in.

i placed my bags on the bed provided and just stared out the window. shuffling feet came from outside my door and i heard the door open.

"this is not fair."

the 3 boys filled into my room and stood beside me, admiring the view i had. an overwhelming sense of comfort washed over me as we stayed there, just enjoying the moment. a sense i hadn't felt in a long time.

.

-

"okay so i'll run to ikea and get 4 good chairs and desks, nick goes and gets basic necessities, george works on the pc set ups and y/n goes to get groceries. sound good?"

we soon had realized we had little to nothing in the apartment, so we split up and each headed separate ways. we somehow managed to get 2 rental cars so nick and i drove to the nearest target while clay headed to ikea and george stayed home.

i was worried going with nick would be awkward since we weren't the closest, but it was impossible not to enjoy my time with him. he knew a shocking amount of one direction and we practically lost our voices singing so hard.

once in target however, i felt less like his friend and more like a mom watching over a small child. we were only one year apart in age, but after this i wasn't so sure anymore. i'd never seen a 19 year old get excited over legos.

"y/n come ON. it would be so cool if we just made a lego city- Y/N!!" he groaned as i literally dragged him away from the toys isle.

his temper tantrum ended once we got to the groceries and we actually had to be adults. while he was getting fruit, i sneaked in some premade cookie dough. i didn't want to be a total grouch, plus i think everyone would appreciate some comfort food our first night.

we somehow managed to get everything we needed, and nick somehow convinced me to get a lego set. we got a very confused stare from the cashier and hurried off without looking back. once we reached the car we burst out laughing.

"you're POSITIVE you're 19? that temper tantrum had 5 year old written all over it." i laughed at him as we started driving off.

"the very first thing in our apartment is gonna be a sick skyscraper and you almost stopped me. imagine how embarrassed you'll be when we look back on today and appreciate my wonderful design choice. we'll see who's laughing." he responded and i threw up my hands in defeat.

we got back to the apartment and i started unpacking the food while nick sat in the middle of the living room floor opening the legos. i had put up the last things when clay came through the door.

he stopped in his tracks once he saw what nick was doing.

"Y/N CAN YOU GET THE STUFF FROM THE CAR THE KEYS ARE IN MY BAG- NICK HOW FAR ARE YOU LET ME HELP!" he yelled and threw his stuff on the counter. i jumped back, startled by his sudden screaming and stared at what was happening in front of me.

clay raced to nick and practically fell on the floor, nick was sitting cross crossed in our barren living room, legos spread out everywhere. i once again questioned if i had actually moved in with adults.

george emerged from the hallway, no doubt wondering what all the screaming was about. he realized what the other children were doing, and no longer to my suprise, ran to join them. i shook my head with a laugh and headed down to the car to get the stuff clay had left. i could hear their giggles all the way to the elevator.

-

2:00 am

the rest of the day passed in a blur. sure it was exciting and fun, but now i'm all alone, in this empty room, with no one to break me from my thoughts. i had to get up and do something.

i could bake the cookies?

i quietly opened my door and walked to the kitchen. i got out the dough and a tray we bought earlier today.

this was a mistake y/n, and you know it. this will be fun for about a week and then you'll regret it.

i had always baked to help me when i started getting in my head. i tried to focus on rolling the dough evenly.

you don't know these people at all and you moved all the way across the country with them, why did you do that? you could have at least gotten to know them a bit more.

a shaky breath left me and tears started to form.

you really just crashed their whole group you know. they could have done this without you, and they'd probably be happier. they'd all have their own rooms, and all the legos they wanted.

the tray fell against the counter as my eyes blurred from all the tears. i sank to the floor and just sat there, trying to stay quiet.

i heard a small creak in the hallway and covered my mouth. i'm sure it was nothing but i couldn't see anyone like this.

you're such a mess, y/n.

"y/n? why are you on the floor, are you okay?"

a tired voice spoke out to me, and my hands flew to my face, trying to wipe all the tears off and fix my hair. i didn't trust my voice so i just nodded.

a hand fell to my shoulder and slowly turned me to face them. it was clay, crouched down next to me, worry painted his face.

"y/n.. i'm so sorry. do you need to talk?"

i slowly nodded and he sat down with me, hugging me softly. that small gesture was all i needed, and i completely broke down in his arms.

i was never one to cry in front of people, and this was the second time in front of clay. but for some reason, i didn't care. he didn't say a word as i vented all of the frustration and fear out, he just held me closer. once i finished he pulled us apart and looked at me closely.

"i am so so sorry y/n. i understand how terrifying this must be and you have every right to feel this way...

he took a deep breath and i readied myself for the but.

...but if you think for one second i don't want you here with us, you're crazy. there is no one i'd rather have. i cant take away all your worries, but i promise. we will never get sick of you."

my heart was racing. tears starting forming again, but they were tears of relief. i felt heard, understood, cared for.

"no no no that wasn't supposed to make you cry more!" he lightly joked, and carefully wiped the tears off my cheek.

"thank you. for everything. you helped me more than you know." i said to him shakily, as i tried to stand up.

he got up quickly and offered me his hand. i took it, and leaned against the counter as i regained my balance.

"now let's finish these cookies, they sound really good right now."