As the days passed and the messages between Sammie and I grew shorter, I could feel myself sinking into a black hole. Everything became dull. My videos became shorter and the editing became worse. Elliot and Kath blocked my number and I was no longer being invited over to create content with Click. I knew I fucked up.

I dialed her number again and waited to hear her soft voice but all I was met with was her voicemail. By now I was sure she was annoyed with the phone calls and texts but I felt so empty. I'd lost the other half of myself. The one thing that made my world complete. So I dialed her number again.

"Please stop calling me." I felt the phone tremble in my hand. I hadn't expected her to answer, but now that she had, I didn't know what to say.

"Sammie, listen." She sighed.

"I can't. What you did is unforgettable." I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes, but I refused to break.

"I know I hurt you. I know that what I did to you is something so awful you should have blocked my number. But Sammie, it was a moment of weakness for me. My heart was broken over the Jacob situation and I found myself in a weak moment. Ilsa doesn't mean anything to me anymore and I'm sorry that I let her of all people come between us. I should have been stronger for you, baby. I'm so sorry." I could hear the soft whimpers on the other end of the line.

"I'm sorry Lannan, but I need time." And with that the line went dead. The worst part of the entire situation was that she was only a phone call away and I knew that there was a minimal chance I would get a response again. So I tried to go on with my day. I sat down in front of my camera and turned it on.

"G'day fellas. Today is gonna be a little different. I'm not gonna be recording a fortnite video, it's more of an apology video. Most of you have probably noticed that I haven't been posting much about Sammie. I never wanted to make this video," I paused, trying to compose myself. "But we broke up. I made a mistake that cost me the best thing in my life. Now I don't want any of you sending her hate or blaming her because this was all me. I hurt the woman I'm in love with and I have to live with that." The video went on for another fifteen minutes before I finally locked my eyes on the camera. "And to Sammie, if you're by chance watching this, I'm so fucking sorry. I can't live with the fact that I hurt you and broke your trust. I love you. I'm sorry." I uploaded the video and waited for the comments. I knew many of them would be siding with me but I wanted to see the ones that degraded me. I wanted people to be angry with me. After all, I had hurt the one person in the world that completed it. Within seconds comments began pouring in.

❤️

That was just the first few. I hated that they were all kind. I wanted the anger. I wanted the hatred. But then one comment caught my eye. I noticed the profile picture almost immediately. I could feel my heart clenching in my chest as I read it closely.

❤️

I wanted to write back. To apologize again. But the little heart that she left at the end of the message was enough to settle my constantly stirring mind. I leaned back against my chair and let out the breath I hadn't realized I was holding. Yes, she was hurt, but she had forgiven me. All she asked is that I fully respect her want for space. And I did. No matter how much I wanted to call her and no matter how much the phone trembled in my hand, I knew she needed this time for herself.

My phone vibrates against the desktop and I grabbed it swiftly in my hand. Elliot's named popped up on the screen and I answered. "Hey, El."

"Hey, man. So, the others and I saw your video and we think we've been too hard on you. You made a mistake, an awful one at that. But we want you to come film a video with us tomorrow. You in?" I agreed before ending the call. A picture of Sammie and I on the beach was still my lock screen. Her arms were wrapped lazily around my shoulders and her lips were firmly pressed against mine. The sun was setting in the background and it looked like the perfect scene from a romance movie. I knew at that moment that I was gonna win my woman back, no matter what the costs.

*Sorry for the late update. The last month has been HECTIC, but expect regular uploads from now on. And thank you for your feedback!*