VICTORIA'S POV

I opened my eyes.

I felt weird. I knew I had fallen from a tree and that Xeris had found me. With their amazing advancements in technology and medicine, I thought I would wake up feeling perfectly fine. But I didn't. I moved my head to one side and saw a screen with slow beeping sounds coming from it. I turned it to the other side and saw a head lying on the bed. It was Xeris. He had fallen asleep on a stool. He held my hand in his. His head was facing mine and I could see the dark circles under his eyes. He looked exhausted.

How long have I been unconscious this time?

I wanted to let him sleep a little longer. He looked like he needed it. I took the opportunity to admire him. His stubble had developed into a beard.

When was the last time he shaved?

I decided, I liked it on him. The entire time, he held onto my hand. That hand was getting a little sweaty but I didn't mind one bit. This was the most intimate contact we had ever had, I wasn't going to let it end so quickly.

My hand looked so small in his. Maybe he just had unnaturally large hands. His hair was dishevelled. His clothes looked wrinkled.

When was the last time he showered?

I looked at his forehead, then his closed eyes and eyelashes, still envious of their length. I then moved to look at his nose and finally his lips. The faint beeping in the background sped up. I swallowed heavily and tried to clear my mind of the thought of kissing him. I would have continued scrutinizing his features if it weren't for my traitorous stomach.

It rumbled long and loud.

This got him to wake up with a start and stood up.

He looked at me while blinking the sleep out of his eyes.

"You're awake." He phrased it like a question.

"I'm awake," the only reply I could think of.

"Thank heavens," he sighed heavily and sat back down.

"How long was I out this time?" I smiled a little.

He didn't smile back. He checked his watch and said, "Almost three days."

I looked at the ceiling, "A record, even for me," I smiled again and turned to look at him. He still had a serious expression and wouldn't take his eyes off me.

"Did I fall on my face?" I asked.

"No, you fell on your back."

"Then why are you looking at me so intensely?" He still wouldn't look away.

"I thought I lost you," he stated softly.

Those five words took my breath away. I couldn't look at him anymore and turned back to look at the ceiling.

Don't read too much into it.

I didn't know what to say, but an unlikely saviour came to my rescue.

His stomach rumbled.

I couldn't help but laugh. It was cut short by my stomach deciding to rumble too. This had him chuckling.

"I guess it's time we ate," he said while standing up.

I was about to do the same when he reached down and scooped me up in his arms. I instinctively wrapped my hands around his neck for fear of falling at the sudden assault. This reminded me of the first time he carried me like this, when I first got here. Only this time, I fit snugly in his arms. Each contour of my body melding with his.

"I can walk," I mumbled not really looking at him.

"Oh? How can you walk with a broken leg?" I could feel his eyes on my face.

"Broken leg?" I asked looking at me feet.

I gasped. "When did that happen?"

"Have you already forgotten you fell down a tree? Did you not notice it this entire time?"

I hadn't noticed it at all. I was too busy staring at him. I looked again as we moved out of the medical bay and to the kitchen and noticed it was encased in some gel-like substance. This must have served as a cast.

He noticed me looking as he set me down on the stool. While I touched it and confirmed that it was gel-like in nature, I noticed some movement in it. Little lights would go off here and there and little things would move about too. "That is similar to what you Earthians call a cast. Except, instead of just keeping your bones in place while they heal on their own, it aids in the healing process. You will be as good as new in a couple of days."

"Wow, that's... amazing."

He got our food while I continued looking at what was happening inside. Then it hit me. These clothes weren't the ones I was wearing when I went to the greenery.

"Who changed my clothes?" I asked a little anxious.

"Bulba."

I released a sigh of relief. Upon hearing it, he turned to look at me, then went back to what he was doing.

We ate in a comfortable silence and then he took me to the sitting area. The atmosphere suddenly changed. It became more serious.

He kept his eyes on his clasped hands before him for a while and then looked up at me. "This is all my fault, he said as he looked me in the eyes."

"How is it your fault? I'm the one who strayed off the paths when you told me not to. I should have stayed on the paths, but my curiosity got the best of me. I wanted to learn something new. I'm sorry." I finished and looked down at my lap.

"Don't apologise. Let me finish and don't interrupt me," he said still looking at me. "You wouldn't have gotten into this predicament if it wasn't for my past mistakes," he sighed.

Past mistakes?

"I told you that I grew up in a......home where there weren't any kids around. After what happened with Nala, my caretaker, I didn't let anyone get close to me. I became the pri... son I thought everyone wanted me to be. I made sure not to do anything that would make me stray from the path I had set for myself. I immersed myself in my education and had time for little else."

He had this faraway look in his eyes, like he had gone back to the past.

"Being the youngest around, I didn't expect to ever meet anyone around my age. But I did. I was fourteen when I met her. Anigra. She was two years older than me. Her father was, is, one of the greatest minds on Thanzor and hails from one of the founding families. He often came around to discuss the mission with my parents and he brought her along each time," he paused for a bit.

Anigra? They have the strangest names.

"Naturally, I kept my distance from her. I didn't know how to talk to anyone my age, let alone girls. But she persistently followed me around. Her persistence annoyed me in the beginning because she interfered with my self-imposed schedule. But after seeing how mother took a liking to her, I decided to stop trying to avoid her. After actually talking to her, I realised that she was smart, and knew quite a lot of things that I did not. I preferred her teachings to the teachings of my teachers, but only because she provided a fresh perspective to everything she taught. She had a childish air about her, but somehow, that intrigued me. I hadn't really gotten the chance to act like the child I was because of the family I was born into and because I knew the consequences of it."

The way he said that last part had me squinting my eyes. But I didn't ask anything because he had asked me not to interrupt.

"She somehow always found a way to persuade me into doing things that I normally would have avoided for fear of being reprimanded. But I could tell that she had mother's favour, so, I indulged her despite it going against my principles."

At this, I really wanted to ask what she made him do. He must have noticed the look on my face because he answered, "things such as sneaking out of the pal... house, playing pranks on the serv...workers, or playing outside with the horses," he cleared his throat, "things that normal children did at that age." He looked at his hands.

Normal children?

My eyebrows shot up at that. Why did he keep stopping short on certain words?

"I didn't care much for her antics. I was actually getting tired of having to entertain her behaviour. As time passed, I started to notice that she was too childish for my liking. Her way of seeing things and thinking irritated me just as much as it intrigued me in the beginning. She became... clingy. Not physically per say. But her following me around became... unpleasant," he looked like he had just eaten something bitter.

I snorted while smiling. I could tell he was trying not to insult the girl.

"Our parents noticed how much time we spent together and mistook it for affection. They started talking of a possible future marriage between us. The thought of spending the rest of my life with someone I found to be more and more displeasing was... unbearable."

He looked up at me as if to gauge my reaction. I didn't show anything and he continued.

"In her head, I was already hers. I was going to resign to my fate when the announcement of this mission was made. This mission gave me a way out. I couldn't let this opportunity go. I had to act quick before they seriously started talking about marriage between the families. So, I volunteered for this mission. Yes, initially, the purpose was to run away from my pending doom," I snorted and rolled my eyes, "but I realised how important it was to be a part of this mission. It would also serve as motivation for the other males to volunteer, what with my family background."

He wasn't looking at me anymore but I paid no heed to it. I was still trying to figure out how this story had anything to do with my getting lost.

"I never expected that she would also volunteer for this mission."

He looked me in the eyes again.

"She was part of the team responsible for monitoring the greenery. She saw you stray off the paths and took advantage of it. She erased the footage of you ever going into the greenery and shifted the location of the paths whenever you got to close to finding them. That is why you weren't able to find your way out."

My jaw dropped.

You could change the location of the paths?

He continued and I closed my mouth, "She wanted to make sure you were never found. Well, found alive."

The wheels turned in my head, "Because she wanted me out of the picture and have you all to herself?"

He looked to my healing leg, "yes."

I could clearly see the guilt on his face.

"How is that your fault?"

This question seemed to surprise him.

"She did all this because of me. I'm the reason she tried to get rid of you," he said with his eyebrows coming together, confused.

"No, you're the reason I'm still alive. You're the one who found me. You can't blame yourself for another person's actions. You didn't tell her to do any of it."

"But..." I cut him off, "but nothing."

He looked surprised. I was surprising myself too.

"I admit, I thought I was a goner for sure. I was scared out of my mind. But, I'm still breathing. She didn't succeed."

I looked down at my clasped hands on my laps, "we both need to stop blaming ourselves for other people's actions. We've done enough of that. We can't let it keep us down forever. That would be admitting defeat."

A small smile crept to his lips, "you're amazing," he said.

I couldn't help smiling shyly.

I looked up at him and noticed him unsuccessfully trying to stifle a yawn.

"I still feel a little tired," I said, "could you help me?"

He stood and came to my side. He lifted me and took me to my side of the bed and tucked me in. He then went into the closet, grabbed his sleep attire and went to the bathroom. I didn't notice when he came out because I had already fallen asleep.