《Ashtray/Javon imagines》𝐏𝐎𝐕
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feeding y'all cuz im nice tbh
❝𝙰𝚂𝙷𝚃𝚁𝙰𝚈❞
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It's like you got superpowers
Turn my minutes into hours
You got more than 20-20, babe
Made of glass the way you see through me
It was like Ash had some sort of power. He always knew when there was something wrong with me even if i acted like i was okay or told him i was fine. He can see through me like a clear glass, not that i minded. It showed that he truly cared and actually understood me unlike anyone else.
You know me better than I do
Can't seem to keep nothing from you
How you touch my soul from the outside?
Permeate my ego and my pride
He definitely knows me more than i know myself. Since Ash understood me and always knew what was up, I couldn't keep anything from him. So whenever something was wrong, i told him freely and he helped with with it. He touched my soul and stole my heart, i adored him in every way possible.
I wanna love me (ooh)
The way that you love me (ooh)
Ooh, for all of my pretty
And all of my ugly too
I'd love to see me from your point of view
I want to love my like Ash loves me. Lately, i've been feeling insanely insecure and when i told Ash about it, he grew concerned. "" he reassured me and for a cold, dull, 15 year old, Ashtray sure had a way with words. But sometimes I'd love to see me from his point of view..
I wanna trust me (trust me)
The way that you trust me (trust me)
Ooh, 'cause nobody ever loved me like you do
I'd love to see me from your point of view
Ashtray also trusts me an awful lot which i was actually grateful for, i trusted him too. Whenever we told each other secrets, it remained with us and only us. Ash probably trusts me more than i trust myself. Nobodys ever shown me the type of love Ash has shown me and i will forever be grateful for that.
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I'm gеtting used to receiving
Still gеtting good at not leaving
I'ma love you even though I'm scared (oh, scared)
Learnin' to be grateful for myself (oh, oh, oh)
Due to my insecurities and past relationships, i have trust issues and I'm always shocked when i receive affection from Ash because 1, i never got it in my horrible other relationship and 2, i was so insecure about myself and didn't know how to react when Ash kissed me or hugged me. I promised that I would love him even if i'm scared something will happen again but Ash also promised he'd love me forever.
You love my lips 'cause they say the
Things we've always been afraid of
I can feel it startin' to subside
Learnin' to believe in what is mine
Ash always says my lips are his favourite part of me when trying to cheer me up from my self hate issues. When i'd ask why, he'd reply: "because they're a nice shape but also, the things you say always make me happy especially when you say things I'm afraid to tell you..you give me confidence" the last part referring to the our first 'i love you's'
I wanna love me (ooh)
The way that you love me (ooh)
Ooh, for all of my pretty
And all of my ugly too
I'd love to see me from your point of view
"" I asked Ash one day, he laughed and gently shook his head.
I wanna trust me (trust me)
The way that you trust me (trust me)
Ooh, 'cause nobody ever loved me like you do
I'd love to see me from your point of view
"Y/n, you're the most beautiful person i've ever met you could NEVER be ugly. Plus, I don't just love you for your looks, your personality is the best. How trustworthy you are, you're humour, you're kindness. I love everything about you, ma, i promise" i always think about his words everyday, it makes me smile.
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I couldn't believe it or see it for myself
Boy, I be impatient, but now I'm out here
Fallin', fallin', frozen, slowly
Fallin', got me right
I won't keep you waitin' (waitin')
All my baggage fadin' safely (my baggage fadin')
And if my eyes deceive me
Won't let them stray too far away
At first, I couldn't believe what i had heard. I froze in my spot and my heart was beating incredibly fast. I fell in love with him all over again. I believed his words because of all the affection and love he had given me since the start of our relationship. Like i said, i trust Ash the most, i love him the most. I always will, nothing will ever stop me.
I wanna love me (ooh)
The way that you love me (ooh)
Ooh, for all of my pretty
And all of my ugly too
I'd love to see me from your point of view
I wanna trust me, ooh (trust me)
The way that you trust me, baby (trust me)
'Cause nobody ever loved me like you do
I'd love to see me from your point of view (oh)
Yeah
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