I pace back and forth in my study, can't help but rewind yesterday like a carousel. I met Anastasia. Anastasia Rose Steele. The same woman who shattered my heart into a million pieces 6 years ago.. without an explanation. And her stupid letter is barely called an explanation.

But why is she here? She mentioned something about me meeting someone. Who is that someone? A boyfriend? Perhaps husband?

It can't be, my subconscious says.

We are still legally married. She can't marry anyone until she gets a divorce from me. Something feels different when I think about the word 'divorce' but I can't quite place it. I'm supposed to be angry remember? But in reality, i'm curious. I still don't want Anastasia back in my life, but I do want to know where did she hide in these past years and why did she come here again.

A knock on the door distracts me. I call the person inside.

"You called, Mr. Grey?", Taylor says, confused.

"Yes, go get the car ready, we are going to the office", I state. He looks at me dumfounded.

"Mr. Grey, umm.. today is a sunday..", he trails off, probably thinking that his boss is out of his brain. True. I'm losing my shit right now. Plus I have paperwork to do, maybe that will distract me.

"Thank you for being my calendar but can you now go get the car out from the fucking parking lot?", I say, venom oozing in my voice. I don't intend to be this rude, specially not with Taylor.. after all he was there for me every second in these 6 years, literally been a call away.

He widens his eyes a little and mutters a timid apology and leaves immediately. I feel so disgusted with myself right now.. what is happening? Is this all Anastasia? Or is it just my mind bugging me to constantly to think about her and ruin my day?

I get into the car and Taylor drives me to my office building. I sit comfortably in the backseat, still going through the last night's happenings.

I met her. She looks so much thinner than before.. her hair.. why is it short? I loved her long locks. Random memories of me braiding her hair comes to my mind. I gulp and shove it to the corner of my mind, hell I throw the thought away.

After I left her, when Kate, Elliot and me got into the car, there was utter silence. No one spoke anything at all.. and I was surprised at Kate's reaction. Anastasia's departure broke not only me but her too. Unlike me, she wasted years thinking what could've been the reason for Ana's sudden escape? As she always say, and I quote, "so pure and innocent that can put a baby to shame." Guess she wasn't that pure and innocent as such.

Taylor suddenly stops the car and I look outside to an unfamiliar place. Wait, this isn't my office?

"The car is out of gas", Taylor mutters the answer to the unasked question and gets out. I sigh and get out as he refills the gas. Taylor has been weird since yesterday. His whole demeanor screams something's off but I can't place it. He explained his disappearance yesterday saying 'Sawyer had some issues' and that's all. Not only him, my whole staff is acting weird. I hardly have been seeing of Sawyer lately, what issues is he facing? Hope they aren't too serious.

I was fidgeting with phone when something in the park opposite the gas station catches my eye. Or rather, someone. She is perked up on a bench with her head in her hands. Where have I seen her now? I rack my brains.. i've seen her somewhere.

The hospital.

The girl!

What was her name..? Mina.. Mia.. something from M.. Mila! Her name is Mila! But what is she doing there? All alone?

I make my way to the park to where she is sitting. A man is hovering over her and I look at him straight in the eye and he disappears, probably having wrong intentions about the girl. The park is too crowded and too big.. maybe she is lost?

"Hey munchkin'!", I say enthusiastically, in spite my mind is anything but enthusiastic.

She looks up, her blue eyes meeting mine. She gasps as she sees me but says nothing. I see her eyes glistening and conclude she must be crying.

"What happened babygirl?"

"I lost my mom and i'm not a babygirl", and she makes me laugh. This girl hates the nickname with passion.

I duck down to her level so she doesn't have to strain herself and look up.

"Lost?"

"There is a game thing going on and mom brought me here so we can enjoy but i-", she sobs, "-lost her".

It breaks me to see the girl crying. Her smile is one of the most prettiest thing I remember.

"Let's search for your mother, she must be worried sick too."

I stand up and offer her my hand. She simply looks at my extended hand and stares back at me.

"What? Don't you want to search for your mom?", I furrow my brows.

"I tried, but I couldn't", she says, deadpan.

"I'm helping you this time, c'mon munchkin'!", I offer her my hand again but again she doesn't make a move to take it.

"Why?", she asks.

Why? Because i'm stupid. Because I am going to work on a Sunday. Because a certain woman's thoughts has me so fucked up that searching for an almost stranger girl's stranger mother sounds more interesting.

I want to say all that, but I don't.

"You question a lot. Look, if someone's ready to help you, there is no need to be formal. Take and make the most of any opportunity you get." I impart my wise knowledge.. to a 5 year old. Yeah, no, I need to call Dr. Flynn right now.

More confused look meets my eye but this time she finally takes my hand that was in the air for the past 10 minutes and starting to hurt.

I get a call from Taylor, probably wondering where his shitty boss went. I tell him i'm off to do some work and he should probably leave and i'll call him when i'm done.

Together we walk to the area that has the words 'Carnival' on it which basically is a lot of food and game stall together in a place. And did I mention is overly crowded? Christ, it smells like sweat here.

"How does your mother look?", I ask.

"She is the most prettiest woman", she replies with a toothy grin. Atleast she isn't crying anymore.

"Okay many woman can be pretty.. can I get a more accurate description?"

"Acu rate?", confusion spreads in her eyes.

"Means more.. detailed explanation?"

"Oh. She is.. this woman's height." she points to woman who is making some kind of weird twisty with potatoes. God knows what is going on here.

"She has eyes and hair like me!" she continues. "And she is very pretty", she adds.

Okay so a pretty woman with blue eyes and brunette hair who should be around 5'2". Why does the description look familiar?

And then I know. Anastasia. Literally everybody around me is making me think of Anastasia. So apparently Mila's mom has features of Anastasia. Great coincidence.

Suddenly, Mila let goes of my hand and goes to a person filling balloons with helium. She looks at it with so much concentration it makes me crack up.

"You want one?" and she nods in affirmation.

"Which colour?",I ask and I look up at the multi-coloured balloons.

"Blue", she replies immediately. I look at her, a bit confused. Every girl her age likes pink.. why blue?

"Why blue?", I voice my question.

"Because my teacher in my old school give girls pink candies while boys get blue. And I wanted blue because they look so much better! Then my friend said babygirls like pink and I hate babygirls and so I don't like pink!" and even though her reason seems childish, she has a point. The baised blue-for-boys and pink-for-girls. Something tells me this girl will break stereotypes in future too.

I get her the blue balloon and tie the string on her finger so she doesn't have to hold it.

We start searching for mommy-dear again and i'm starving. Shit, did I actually forget to have breakfast today? I did indeed. My whole morning consisted of thinking solely about my ex-wife.

My negative part of mind started winning over my thoughts and I think we are never going to find Mila's mom. I mean look at the swarm of humans here! I probably need to shout her name or something to get her attention.

That reminds me, I don't even know her name.. Mila's mom. And I still don't know about her dad. The conversation at the hospital flashes back and the silence that I was met with when I asked Mila about her father had me curious about her. But again, curiosity kills the cat.

Did i just answer my own question?

Probably.

"Hey munchkin' what is your mom's -"

"Mommy!", she cries suddenly.

"Mommy?", I look at her but she is looking ahead. She leaves my hand and runs towards someone.

I look upto see her mommy whose face is currently hidden by the balloon I got for Mila as she hugs her child tightly.

Should I just leave silently or give her mom a piece of my mind on how not to leave a child's hand in a carnival with this many people? I'd go with option two, always. I'm no saint who'll do the deeds selflessly.

"Hello ma'am, you should really take more care -" I say as I approach the duo.

Blue eyes meet mine when she hears my voice. And not just any blue eyes, HER blue eyes. Her eyes looks panicked but relieved too.

"You!", she says, utterly shocked.

"You!", I say at the same time, equally, even more shocked if possible.

I look between Anastasia and Mila, back and forth, trying to put pieces together.

Anastasia is Mila's mother? Anastasia is a mother?

Suddenly, everything gets clear. I mean you don't need rocket science to get this straight.

Anastasia is Mila's mother. She left me six years ago. Mila is five year's old. So that either means she is adopted or... she is my child.

And something tells me its option two. It's always option two.

~*~*~*~

Picture of Mila above!

One of my favorite chapters! Hope you liked it❤

Until we meet again, Ava❤