The months leading up to your wedding were full of anticipation.

There was a lot of planning to do, and both you and Lin were so excited to get married and move in together.

If you were being honest, you were also really nervous. You had always had this nightmare about tripping on your way down the aisle at the wedding.

Plus, you and Lin were getting married. And were going to live together. What if, when Lin started to get close to you, he would see how messed up you were? You weren't perfect, like him. Sometimes you felt like you didn't deserve him. He was this perfect human specimen, and you were just... you.

Lin had also started to rub off on you. During those few months, you began to write songs.

Look up

You'll see the stars

You'll see how they shine

Just for you, just for you

In the blink of an eye

You make amazing things appear

But what if I were to show you, show you what's in my mind

Would you disappear?

I know that you'd be kind

But listen, you're all that's on my mind

So please

Stay

You sighed and put down the pencil, then rubbed your temples. Obviously, Lin wasn't going to leave you. He proposed to you. He knew what he was getting into. This was really just letting your mind wander then stay in the part of your brain where your insecurity resided.

But still...

What if Lin really did realize how he deserved so much better than you? Your job outside of acting was writing, and that was really it. Basically, if people didn't like what you were selling, you made no money, while Lin constantly had money pouring in. You were just a lowly writer (technically, Lin was a writer too, but you wrote stories). Lin won a Pulitzer Prize. Multiple Grammys. Multiple Tonys. Sure, you won a Tony for playing Eliza, but that was it. Lin deserved better.

You shook off your depressing thoughts. You were marrying this guy. Obviously, he saw something in you. You just wished you knew what it was.

You checked your phone. 2:17 pm.

Crap! You were supposed to meet Lin at Starbucks at 2:20!

You quickly got up and rushed out the door.

~~~~~~~~~~

After you got coffee and were walking around Washington Heights with Lin, your mind wandered again.

Had Lin put the deposit on the beach? You were pretty sure. Or, wait, were you supposed to do that?

You were so disorganized. Lin kind of was too, but to you, that was cute. If you were Lin looking at your disorganization, you would think that it's annoying. Did Lin just overlook that when he decided to propose? Did he just figure that he would have to plan everything?

Lin's waving hand was suddenly in front of your face, and you looked over at him, surprised out of your train of thought.

"Sorry, were you saying something?"

"Yes. I have been for the past five minutes." He studied you, looking concerned. "Is something wrong? You look worried."

"No, I'm fine. I just... can't remember if we put a deposit on the beach venue."

"I did. Remember? You reminded me about it like twenty times, then I finally did it."

See? He thought you were annoying. How could he ever love a nagging fiancée? Much less a nagging wife? Were you just going to constantly bother him once you were married?

"Y/N?"

You snapped out of it again. You looked back at him sheepishly. "Sorry. I got lost in my thoughts again."

Once you were inside a small park, Lin sat down on a bench, and you sat next to him.

"What's going on in there?", Lin asked, looking at you, concern and love and curiosity and care and confusion all in one.

"Nothing, just wedding planning. You know how I... love to think about it all the time."

"It's so weird, outside of the theater, you're such a bad actor."

You glanced over at him, and he had his dark eyebrows raised with a smug but still curious look on his face.

You looked back out into the bright park. It was early August, and there wasn't a single cloud in sight. A gentle breeze was blowing, and the overgrown dry grass was blowing in the wind. You watched a duck landed in a small pond, causing a ripple, and that ripple caused another one, until there was a whole group, and they all just grew.

That was kind of like your thoughts. At first, it was just one thought that maybe Lin might be annoyed by your awkwardness. Then it causes another thought, and soon, you're completely insecure. And you couldn't really control it. It just happened.

"Y/N." You looked back at Lin. "What is it?"

You sighed. "I guess I just don't understand why someone like you would want to be with someone like me. I mean, you're incredibly successful and happy all the time and smart and creative and talented, and I'm just some average writer struggling to write. It just doesn't make any logical sense to me."

Lin was quiet for a moment, and you figured he was really letting your words sink in.

"I love you. So much. But I just feel like you deserve someone... better."

He still didn't speak, so you continued talking to fill the silence.

"And what about when we get married? And what if we have kids? You'll have to spend so much of your time trying to raise them that you won't have as much time to write and do the things that you love." At this point, you were just thinking out loud, letting your ripple thoughts take hold of your speech. "So I'm afraid you're going to resent me and I'm afraid that-"

"Resent you?"

"That this isn't enough for you and I'm afraid that I'm not enough for you." The words rushed out of your mouth.

Lin was silent for a minute.

"Is that really what you think?", he asked, his voice barely above a whisper.

You shrug, then wipe your eyes. You stand up. "I need to go. I'll see you later."

You rush through the park, leaving a confused and speechless Lin.

~~~~~~~~~~

You sat on your couch, sadly cronching away on Ritz.

You had said too much. You had gone too far. You hadn't even said the worst of your thoughts, and Lin was already scared off. Maybe he'd call off the wedding now. Now that he finally saw the insecure person that you were inside.

You turned on your TV and sat on your couch for the rest of the day.

~~~~~~~~~~

Around 9:30 pm, your phone buzzed.

You glanced at it.

Oh great. Now you've done it. He's going to think you said all of that because you were just fishing for compliments, and that's exactly what you were going to get. You were going to get drowned in compliments, which would just make you feel bad. Wonderful.

, you text back.

~~~~~~~~~~

"You came."

You turned and saw Lin walking out of his apartment building.

"Of course I came. We're engaged."

He chuckled, then gestured his head towards the parking lot. "C'mon."

He started walking to his car, and you followed him.

"Where are we going?"

Lin unlocked his car, and you got into the passenger side.

"It's a surprise."

"Lin-"

"You'll like it."

"Really? "

"I'm not looking at you because I know you're giving me your extremely skeptic look, but you will. Trust me."

You sighed, then buckled the seat belt.

~~~~~~~~~~

After about forty minutes, you were really curious.

Where could you be going that would take you that long? At this point, you were out of New York City and were at what looked to be like the middle of nowhere.

"Where are we?", you asked, watching the infinite land pass by.

Lin didn't say anything, and continued driving with a smirk.

When twenty more minutes had passed, Lin finally pulled over, and you both got out of his car.

"We're literally in the middle of nowhere," you confirmed, looking around at the pretty much empty land.

"Exactly," Lin said, holding out his hand.

You grabbed it, and he lead you out into the field, then sat down once you were pretty far in.

It was still mid-summer, so the night wasn't cold at all. It was an absolutely perfect balance between warm and cool, stuffy and crisp. There was the gentlest of breezes blowing, giving it that perfect final touch.

You closed your eyes and just felt it for a moment.

"You want to know why I brought you out here?"

You opened your eyes and looked at an anticipating Lin. "Yes."

He smiled. "Look up."

Confused, you looked up, then audibly gasped.

There were thousands of stars. No, billions. In the city, you could barely see any stars at night because of how many lights the city constantly had on, and because of the pollution. Out here, there were no lights, no buildings, no distractions, no loud noises. Just you, Lin, and the stars.

"Wow," you whispered.

You and Lin just sat close, stargazing for a while.

Finally, he said, "You see all these stars?"

You looked over at him.

"Some people might see a mess. Just a bunch of random dots in random spots all over the sky. But for anyone who takes the time to look and really see how absolutely stunning they really are, know that they're more than just a bunch of incoherent specks." Lin turned his attention from the sky to you. "They are a beautiful work of art, and anyone would be lucky to even get a glimpse of the beauty they possess beyond the mess."

You were speechless.

After a moment, you asked light-heartedly, "I'm guessing that I'm 'some people'?"

Lin smiled, then looked up at the stars. "This is how I see you."

You looked up again, unable to contain a smile. Your heart swelled upon looking at the gorgeous stars, and you smiled wider.

"I knew that if I tried to tell you all of the things that I loved about you, you would be unreceptive and just brush them off. But I figured that if I helped you see what I see, gave you a visual that you couldn't deny, then you would finally understand."

"Lin..."

"I could never resent you. I love you more than anything, and you will always be my priority over everything." He slid his hand over the top of yours. "And even when you can't see how amazing you are, I will always be here to remind you."

You smiled, unable to speak. You looked at Lin and wrapped your arms around him, barely containing the water in your eyes. You buried your head in the crook of his neck, giving him a gentle kiss as you did so.

He wrapped his arms around you and held you close.

~~~~~~~~~~

Your wedding day came fast.

After the whole stars thing with Lin, you felt a lot better. Obviously, that didn't completely rid you of your insecurities, but it helped. A lot.

You spent a whole day picking your dress with your mom, Karen Olivo, Renee Elise Goldsberry, and Jasmine Cephas Jones. You had met Karen though Lin and had hit it off fast.

It only took the whole day because of how indecisive you were, mixed with how many beautiful dresses there were.

You also felt bad because all of them were really expensive, but Lin told you not to worry about it.

You found the perfect dress, and the perfect flower crown to wear too. You were really happy with your wedding outfit once you had decided on everything.

The beach looked absolutely gorgeous on the day of your wedding. There were simple decorations with lights and flowers, but it looked perfect. And once the ceremony would be starting, that's when the sun would begin to set. It would be like a scene out of a movie.

You sat on the beach in your leggings and T-shirt, taking it all in. You were going to have to start getting ready in a few minutes, and for now, you just wanted to savor the moment.

The bright blue sky with a few wispy clouds, the deep blue sea, the soft tan sand, and the gentle breeze rustling the leaves. It was so relaxing.

Then, something hit you.

By the end of the day, you were going to be Mrs. Miranda. You were actually getting married to Lin. This was actually happening.

Excitement fills you, and you get up and hurry away to the hotel to get ready.

Soon, the time had come, and you waited behind a makeshift wall for your time to go out.

A knot suddenly started growing in your stomach. What if you tripped on your way down the aisle? You were clumsy enough, and your dress was long enough. Yeah, there was like a 70% chance that you would trip.

As you watched the bridesmaids and groomsmen walk away, you just got more and more nervous. All eyes would be on you. You were bound to mess up.

You gripped the bouquet so tight that your knuckles turned white.

"Hey, Y/N, it's going to be okay."

You turned to face your dad, who was giving you a kind smile. "I mean, I might cry, but you're going to be okay," he said with a sad laugh.

You hugged your dad, and he held you tight.

"You look beautiful, and I'm so proud of you."

You let go of him, and see his eyes filled with water.

"Dad, if you cry, I'm going to cry," you said with a small laugh.

The song on the piano changed, which was your cue to walk down the aisle.

Your dad looped his arm through yours, and, after a deep breath, you walked past the wall and stopped at the beginning of the aisle.

Your eyes immediately met Lin's, and his lips parted as he took you in. A smile slowly spread across his face.

You smiled shyly, and began walking, keeping your eyes on Lin.

When you were in front of Lin, you handed off your bouquet to Renee, gave your dad another hug and a kiss on the cheek, then turned and faced Lin again.

The pastor began talking, and Lin mouthed, "You look gorgeous."

You smiled. "I love you," you mouthed back.

"Love you." He grabbed your hands and held onto them throughout the ceremony.

~~~~~~~~~~

The reception was perfect, except you ended up crying when you danced with your dad. You were really close to him, and once he started crying, it was all over for you.

Also, in the middle of dancing, Lin went up onto the stage, made a toast, then began singing. He had written this whole song about how you guys had gotten together, then how amazing it was being with you. He even had this whole dance number choreographed that had pretty much the whole wedding party in it. You loved it.

Then, you and Lin slow-danced together.

"Thank you. For everything," you whispered.

Lin smiled. "Anything for you, Mrs. Miranda."

You grinned and gave him a kiss.

You were going to be fine.

You were going to be just fine.