As a future mother you want nothing more than that your child is healthy, everything goes according to plan, you can enjoy the nine month of pregnancy. You did, until you lost the child, leaving you empty with that slightly swollen belly that meant nothing anymore. It would be a boy and you would been so proud of him, Ubbe would be so proud of him. But you lost ... After a whole night of pain you lost that child, leaving you emptyhanded behind on the bed. Since that day you felt hardly anything. You didn't wanted to talk with your mother, you didn't talked to your little brother, you even tried to escape your husband, Ubbe. You knew he was hurt to, it was his son to but in some way you couldn't look at him. Drawn back in your own sadness you tested his patience.

One day he lost that patience. You sat on the plain field behind your house. Flowers stroking the grass with their cheerful colors when Ubbe stopped beside you. You only looked shortly towards his shoes before gazing back before you, arms wrapped around your knees. 'This has to stop Y/n.' He began. You rested your chin on your knees, not wanting to look up to him while that crop formed in your throat again. 'I'm tired of this.' He followed. 'I see him running through this field.' You whispered, imagining your son running, catching butterflies while he was still young enough to do it. You heard Ubbe sign before he sat down beside you. 'I see him everywhere.' Your voice shook under the heavy sadness your soul contained. 'I disappointed you Ubbe, I can't live like this, I,' 'Hey Y/n,' he interrupted you, laying his fingers softly underneath your chin while turning your face gentle to his. Your eyes were blurry from the tears, while his were just so comforting. You missed those eyes, why were you ignoring him? 'You are not disappointing me, never, do you understand.' He stroke his thumb over your cheek, chasing the tears away from your pale skin. You looked into his eyes before you closed yours, pushing the tears down. 'What if I can't get children anymore? What if the gods are angry? The thought is tearing me apart, I want to be a mother, I want to,' 'Come here.' He tugged at your shoulder. You let him, he pulled your body between his legs so your back rested against his chest. He wrapped his arms around you, placed his chin against your shoulder. 'The gods aren't angry and I'm sure that you can have a child later on.' He started, placing a kiss on your collarbone. You laid your hands on his crossed arms before your chest, taking comfort in his embrace. 'I love you too much to see you drift off. You need to live again Y/n, I can't bare your sadness any longer.' He whispered. You looked to the flowers, trying to ignore the image of your running son. 'When you are ready we can try again and it will work, I will pray, beg, sacrifice for the gods, it will work.' He encouraged you. You closed your eyes pushing out the last of your sadness for he was right. You turned your head, looking up to his bright blue eyes. He rested his forehead against yours. 'I'm here, don't push me away.' He softly said. You nodded, lowering your eyes to his lips. He kissed you, gently and short. You enjoyed it, it gave you courage. 'I'm sorry, I love you.' You replied.