— 7. Becoming a Woman

It was afternoon time and outside the Great Hall, Bjorn and Tova were sparring with each other. Bjorn held up his shield, grunting as Tova repeatedly slashed at his wooden shield with her sword. "Stop it! Stop it! Enough! You won, you won," He pleaded and Tova laughed in amusement.

She slowly backed away, turning her back to him as she felt satisfied about beating him once more.

Bjorn lowered his shield, only to have his eyes widen in concern at the sight of blood staining the back of Tova's dress.

"Tova! You're bleeding!" He exclaimed worriedly as he rushed forward, "Are you alright?"

Tova frowned at Bjorn's words. She turned to face him and pulled the back of her dress up slightly. She looked down, only to groan in annoyance at the sight of the blood staining her dress. She was having her first monthly bleeding.

"We must find someone. We must find my mother! She'll know how to treat you," Bjorn insisted as he began to pace around, clearly not knowing what was happening to her, "Did I hurt you? I'm sorry. I didn't mean to, I swear—"

"Bjorn, I'm fine," Tova assured Bjorn as she gave him an aggravated look.

"You're not fine. You're hurt! We must go see my mother," He insisted as he grabbed Tova by her hand, preparing to lead her back to the Great Hall.

"I'll go alone," Tova argued as she tugged her arm out of Bjorn's grasp.

"You can't go alone. You're hurt," He complained, causing Tova to groan loudly in annoyance.

"It's normal. I can deal with this on my own," She assured him and despite being hesitant, Bjorn sighed and nodded his head.

He backed up, watching nervously as Tova walked back to the Great Hall with a hand placed over her gut.

It wasn't long before Tova arrived at Lagertha's room. She walked into the room, finding Lagertha sitting on her bed with her hands placed on top of her growing belly.

The moment Tova entered, Lagertha turned, a smile forming on the woman's lips. "Tova," She greeted the girl happily, "What is it, child?"

"I am bleeding," She informed Lagertha, whose smiled faded as she frowned in concern, "I was sparring with Bjorn. He became worried when he saw the blood on my dress. He thought I was dying."

Realizing what was going on, Lagertha began to smile, amused by the thought of Bjorn freaking out over such a thing. "Come here," She insisted as she held her hand out to Tova.

Tova walked forward, grabbing ahold of Lagertha's hand before she sat beside her.

Lagertha smiled widely, wasting no time wrapping an arm around Tova. "I'm sure you were never given the chance to be prepared for such a thing while living with all men in England."

"I was not," She confessed as she stared down at the ground in disappointment, "Siggy told me a bit of it when we spoke of marriage a few days after I returned to Kattegat with Earl Haraldson, but I thought it would be different."

"In what way?" Lagertha asked, a curious look on her face.

"I thought it would be less..." She awkwardly trailed off as she lifted her head to look Lagertha in the eye, "less messy."

"Wait until you birth a child," She told Tova, beginning to smile at her, "You're a woman now. Do you know what that means?"

"It means I can have children and that a year from now, I must marry," Tova informed Lagertha, whose smiled immediately faded.

"Now, who told you that?" Lagertha questioned, raising a puzzled brow at Tova.

"Siggy, my real mother," Tova answered in a calm tone.

Lagertha smiled and shook her head at the young girl. "You live with Ragnar and I. There is no need for you to be married off for political gain any longer," She assured Tova as she placed a hand on her shoulder, "You may marry whom you choose."

"Anyone?" Tova asked curiously and Lagertha smiled, nodding her head.

"Anyone," Lagertha replied with a smile on her face, "Though I believe that deep down, Ragnar hopes you would marry Bjorn one day."

"Bjorn?" Tova questioned, beginning to giggle, "I could never marry Bjorn. He's...Bjorn."

Lagertha laughed at Tova's words and nodded her head. "Perhaps matters will change in the future. You never know."

"Perhaps," Tova replied, smiling slightly.

____

Several days had passed and one day, in the Great Hall, Bjorn, Gyda, and Tova were sitting together, playing a board game. However, they turned and frowned when they saw Athelstan enter with Siggy, of all people.

"My lady Lagertha," Athelstan spoke up in a calm tone, "I hope you can find it in your heart to speak to the wife of the late Earl."

"Of course," Lagertha replied without hesitation, "Hello, Siggy. Please sit down and join us."

"Wait!" Bjorn exclaimed in concern, causing the group to turn to him, "Earl Haraldson tried to kill my father."

"I know," Lagertha replied, letting out a large sigh, "And if he had succeeded, I would be standing where Siggy's standing now. So what would you like me to say to her?"

"I would ask her to sit down," Bjorn replied awkwardly and Tova laughed.

"Oh, look who decided to be nice for once," Tova commented, causing Bjorn to turn to glare at her.

"Shut up," He snapped at her coldly and Lagertha sighed in annoyance.

"Both of you, be nice," She scolded them at once, both children raised their hands in surrender.

Moments had passed and Tova continued to stand with Bjorn, eavesdropping as Siggy offered her services to Lagertha. Lagertha ended up agreeing, offering her protection to both Siggy and Thyri.

Tova had watched on uneasily, a part of her feeling bad that right after Earl Haraldson had died, Tova had immediately been taken in by Ragnar and his family while Siggy and Thyri had not. They had to ask to be taken in. And now, there was no escaping them for Tova.

____

It was nighttime. Tova entered Lagertha's room, feeling nervous.

Lagertha opened her eyes, looking concerned at the sight of the girl. "What is it, my child?" She asked in concern as she sat up and turned to Tova.

"I cannot sleep," Tova admitted in a whisper and Lagertha gave the girl a sympathetic look.

"Come here, beside me, Tova," Lagertha encouraged the girl, smiling as she lifted the furs beside her and allowed Tova to lay next to her, "What troubles you?"

"I fear for Ragnar and his men, so far away in England," She confessed softly as she laid beside Lagertha, looking worried.

Lagertha smiled softly at Tova. She lifted her hand, affectionately stroking the girl's cheek. "You will soon realize, young Tova, all our lives are fated and we must accept that."

"Why? Can we not change our fate?" Tova found herself asking and Lagertha chuckled softly.

"You sound like Ragnar," Lagertha admitted, causing them both to smile before Tova glanced downwards at Lagertha's belly.

Lagertha smiled, watching as Tova lightly placed a hand against her pregnant belly and softly gasped when she felt the baby kick. "I can feel it moving against my hand," She confessed and Lagertha placed her hand over Tova's.

"He has a strong kick," Lagertha replied as she hummed in response.

"He? It's a boy?" She asked and Lagertha nodded her head, "How do you know?"

"A long time ago, the seer prophesized that Ragnar would have many sons. That's how I know it's a boy," Lagertha informed Tova, causing the young girl to smile at the thought.

"Does it hurt? When the child is born?" Tova asked, a curious look on her face.

"It is agonizing. But it is all worth it once your child is placed in your arms for the first time. There is no greater feeling in this world. Trust me on that," Lagertha explained and Tova began to smile.

"I would like to have a child one day," Tova confessed, beginning to smile at the thought, "To love and care for. I do not care if it is a boy or girl. I just would like a child. Perhaps many children."

"Now, now, Tova, you may have had your bleeding, but don't rush to have a child just yet. You have your whole life ahead of you," Lagertha reminded the girl as she wrapped an arm around her and pulled her closer to her, "Let yourself be a child for as long as you can because when you become an adult, you will wish more than anything to be a child again."

"I understand," Tova replied, nodding her head in understanding. The duo laid in silence together with Tova's head rested against Lagertha's shoulder as the woman had her arms wrapped around her, "I've never had this before, but I love it."

"And what may that be?" Lagertha asked and Tova slowly lifted her head to look her in the eyes.

"A family," Tova replied softly and Lagertha's eyes softened as she tried her hardest not to tear up.

"Well, you needn't worry about that, Tova. You will always have us now. We are your family and we're not going anywhere," She assured the girl and Tova nodded, smiling at the thought before the two of them gradually fell asleep.

Outside the room, Siggy stood alone, tears threatening to spill from her eyes after listening to the conversation. She wanted nothing more than to be a mother to her daughter, but there was no use. She had already found a new family and it wasn't like Tova would give them up for her.

Ragnar and his family saved her from her suffering in England and nothing would change that. They weren't her birth family, but they were her chosen family. They ended her suffering and for that, Tova would always choose them.

_____

The following day, Tova was making her way through the Great Hall when she saw numerous servants rushing to Lagertha's room. As she walked in, she frowned at the sight of a pile of bloody clothes outside the room.

She rushed in, finding Lagertha sitting in bed with blood covering her thighs and her dress as she sobbed.

She frowned, not knowing what was going on at first, but soon caught on that Lagertha must have been losing her child.

She sighed in defeat and rushed over to Lagertha. She immediately wrapped arms around the woman and Lagertha hugged back, the two of them beginning to cry at the loss of the child.

____

It was long before Ragnar arrived back to Kattegat, immediately left distraught by the news of the death of his unborn son.

Tova walked into the Great Hall to find Ragnar sitting on the floor with his back facing her. She sighed in defeat, just before walking over to him.

Ragnar turned his head slightly, already knowing it was Tova. "Every nine years, we travel to the temple at Uppsala, to give thanks to the Gods and to offer them sacrifices for all they do for us. For protecting us, for the success in battle, for the rains that they bring that grow our crops and, of course, for our children. That includes you now as well, Young Tova."

Ragnar sighed, looking down at the ground in front of him. "This year I was not going to go, for there is too much to do around here. Then my unborn son was cruelly taken from me, and it made me wonder what I had done to anger the gods," He explained to her before gesturing to the empty space next to him, "Come, sit with me."

Tova nodded and wasted no time obeying him. She sat down beside him and Ragnar turned, giving her a curious look. "What do Christians do about such pain? You lived in a church for six years. I assume you would know."

"In the bible, it says that all sorrows will pass," She informed him and Ragnar nodded in understanding.

"Have you read this bible?" Ragnar asked her curiously, leading to Tova shaking her head.

"No, I don't know how to read, but I've had parts of it read to me by Athelstan and other monks," She replied in a calm tone.

"In any case, I've decided to go," He informed her as he let out a large sigh, "I'm going to take the children for the first time, for it's important that they go. And you shall go as well. You are a part of this family now. You would like to go, wouldn't you?"

"I would love to go," Tova admitted, smiling happily at the thought.

"Good," Ragnar replied as he turned to look at her, "I would have taken you anyway."

"I would have expected nothing less," Tova commented, causing them both to chuckle.

"I met King Aelle, you know," He informed her, causing Tova to smile in amusement.

"You did?" She asked, her eyes lighting up at the thought, "What was he like?"

"Every thing you said he was. He is a fat, lazy king who seems to be nothing more than a coward," He explained, causing Tova to chuckle in amusement.

"I wish I had been there to meet him," Tova replied, her small gradually fading.

"Perhaps when you are older and have enough training to go to battle, you can go to England with me and you will get to meet him. But first, you still have a lot to learn," He explained as he shook up from his seat, "Come. Let us practice outside."

Tova smiled and nodded her head. With that, the duo made their way outside to spar together.

Finally, some lagertha and Tova content and they're so cute. 🥺🥺