😊

The sun beamed down, warming up your skin as you lay in the grass of your backyard. You had woken up exceptionally early today. More like you couldn't sleep at all last night and instead of trying to get an extra few hours of sleep you decided to spend time outside with Sora. She trotted around the yard for a while before she found herself next to you, laying on the blanket you had put out.

The sliding glass door opened and suddenly the sun was gone and a shadow covered you. Your brother's face looking down at you.

"What are you doing out here so early?" He questioned, he seemed genuinely surprised that you were even up right now.

"I couldn't sleep so I decided to just get up." Your voice sounded flat even to you.

He sighed moving to take a seat next to you, Sora laying between you both. Things weren't back to normal for you two by a long shot but at least you were on speaking terms again.

"Can I ask you something?" Your brothers voice filling the silence that had settled between you.

"Go for it," your eyes still staring up at the sky, watching the clouds as they slowly moved against the blue atmosphere.

"Are they real? Your feelings for Bakugou are they real?" You turned your head, perplexed by his question. He saw your confused expression before he continued, "It's just you got this thing going with Hoshi, so I was wondering if it was real, or if you were just doing that thing were you're infatuated with someone and then you move on."

You couldn't be mad at him for asking, you did have a tendency to do that. But it irked you that he thought you would try to ruin their friendship for something that wasn't real.

"E, as of right now, everything with Hoshi is for work. I mean he's a great distraction from everything but I don't feel anything for him romantically." You paused a moment, taking in what you just said. "As for Bakugou, yeah, of course it was real. It still is real. He made me happy, E. He's nothing like anybody I've ever met before." Your voice drifted off as you felt tears building up again. You took a deep breath, you didn't want to cry anymore.

He got up then, "I'll be right back." He walked back towards the house, pulling his phone out as he opened the sliding glass door.

You stared up at the clouds a few moments longer trying to put all these feelings into the back of your mind. Feeling a bit more calm you took out your own phone, texting Jirou to let her know about tonight and that you got her the autograph she wanted.

He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose as he hung up the phone. That wasn't the conversation he was expecting. He couldn't use Kiri as an excuse anymore. Thinking back to the summer, when Kiri had asked him to stay way from his sister, he didn't think he needed his permission to date her. If Kirishima didn't like that, he was sure he would get over it one day. But now, after that phone call, Kiri's approval was no longer an issue.

He missed her, that was obvious, even he couldn't deny that fact, no matter how much he wanted to. She had somehow managed to worm her way into his heart. He wasn't truly aware of how much she actually meant to him until he let her go. He could always blame Kiri for it but he knew deep down that it was his insecurities that got the better of him.

Even now as he thought of how he so badly wanted her back in his arms, how he missed the soft touch of her hand against his harsh and rough one. He even missed the sweet scent of her whenever she was close. But there was always that nagging voice in the back of his head that told him he wasn't good enough. Told him he had already ruined things beyond repair. It was the same voice that told him he wasn't good enough to be the number 1 hero. The same voice that pushed him to let her go to reach his dreams.

He dropped his head into his hands. He was torn, as the voices of what he wanted and what he feared raged inside him. A knock at his door pulled him from his inner turmoil. He closed his eyes, taking a deep breath to compose himself before he got up. Who could possibly be at his door right now?

Upon opening the door he found Jirou standing in the hallway. He squinted at her in confusion, but before he could demand to know why she was there she spoke.

"I'm not on your side or anything, but I have known you longer than Hoshi so I figured I'd help you." He grimaced at her mention of help. He's gotten better at it but he still wasn't too fond of needing it. "Don't look at me like that. You need as much help as you can get right now. Or did you two just magically get back together within the last 10 seconds?"

He rolled his eyes, "Just spit it out already."

"All I know is that she's going out with him again tonight." His eyes closed instinctively to hide the hurt that flashed in his expression. "It's like a work party or something, I have a feeling he's going to make his move soon. So you better hurry up and figure out what you want to do."

He nodded, not really seeing her anymore as he was pulled back under in the sea of his thoughts.

"Right," he closed the door on her, not wanting to be around anyone at the moment.

He'd already swallowed his pride and apologized to her a few times already. But this wasn't like any of those times, this was different. This wasn't just him acting out emotionally, he had torn the relationship in half, completely ending what they had.

Looking down at his knuckles, they looked bruised and scabs had already started to form. Could he fix this? Half of himself was yelling at him, begging him to at least try. Should he fix this? The other half, the half full of doubt told him he would only make things worse, he wouldn't make her as happy as she made him.

He heard the familiar ding of his phone, flipping it up to look at it, he found a text from Jirou.

Jirou: She'll be at the dorms tonight to get ready before she goes out. Just thought you might want to know.

He turned the phone off, tossing it on to his bed. He'd have until tonight to figure out what he wanted to do.

At some point before the afternoon you found yourself back inside. It didn't help your mood at all, feeling like you were confined to the space between the walls. Your mom and grandma had gone grocery shopping and you didn't feel up to it, so you stayed home. Looking through the clothes in your closet, trying to see if you had anything left here to wear. The majority of your clothes had been moved to your dorm to make room for your grandma's things, so there wasn't much to pick from. You spotted a bag hanging in the back of the closet, the dress Mitsuki had made for you. You'd left it here after your dinner, not having any reason to bring it back to school. You could always wear it, it's not like you had anything else at the moment. But something didn't feel right about wearing the dress your ex's mom had made for you.

You heard the door open and turned away from your closet, you'd figure something out later. Walking into the kitchen you found your mom and grandma putting the groceries away, your dad and brother walking outside to get the bags for them. You absentmindedly began to take things out of the bags and placed them on the counter.

"You doing okay dear?" your mom asked when she caught sight of you.

"Hmm?" you glanced up from what you were doing and realized that you were just continuously reaching into a now empty bag. "Uh, yeah, I guess I just have a lot on my mind."

"Well you know both of us are always here to listen."

"I know," you started, "I guess I just, I don't know..." You trailed off.

Your mom gave you a knowing look, "Still thinking about him?" she offered.

"Is it that obvious?" you reached for a new bag, emptying it's contents onto the counter.

"How about we change the topic. Tell us about your night with Hoshi." Your grandma tried to distract you.

You stopped, looking out the window as if the memories of the night before were playing outside. "It was definitely different." You could honestly say that you had never attended a concert quite like that. They asked you a few more questions and you answered them as truthfully as you could. It was true, Hoshi was a really nice guy, but you still weren't in any emotional state to even think about starting anything with him.

Once everything was put away you went to check your phone, the only people who would really text you were Jirou, Mina and Kyoko. Well, the only people who mattered. You were still receiving new followers from hanging out with Hoshi. Someone from last night had snapped a photo of you both getting into the same car and today it was all over the internet. You hadn't taken into consideration how his popularity would affect you. With a quick glance at your phone you saw a message from Kyoko.

Kyoko: Mitsuki told me about the dress she made you. I think you should wear it tonight. Maybe put your hair up or curl it. You'll probably get more press tonight.

You sighed, should you wear it? Mitsuki did say it was for a time when you might need it. You bit your lip, contemplating what you should do. You could always flip a coin.

"Wear it," you turned to find your grandma standing behind you, leaning over your shoulder to look at your phone. You quickly hid your phone and made a face at her. She was always so nosy, but that was one of the reasons you loved her. She chuckled at your reaction. "Wear the dress tonight, dear."

"I don't know," your eyes turning towards your room where the dress sat.

She grabbed your shoulders so you would look at her. "Trust me, wear the dress. I don't think you'll regret it."

You conceded, going to your room to grab the dress. It was about that time to head back to school to get ready anyway. Saying goodbye to everyone you headed back to campus. You shoved your headphones into your ears, hoping to drown your thoughts out with music. It didn't take that long for you to get to your dorm. You quickly grabbed your things, letting Jirou know you were going to take a quick shower before she did your hair. You hated putting your hair up, somehow always managing to miss a piece or two.

When you felt clean you change into your sweats and tried to dry you hair as much as possible. You knocked on Jirou's door on your way back to let her know you were headed back to your dorm. Taking out your blow dryer you got to work so it would be ready for when she got there. She tapped your door a few times to let you know she was there before she walked in.

"So, are you excited for tonight?" she asked as she sectioned out your hair.

You shrugged, "Kind of. I mean I had fun yesterday but this seems... A bit more serious."

She nodded, not really saying anything more as she focused on pinning piece after piece of your hair. Turning on some music to help pass the time, you were careful not to move too much. Before long your hair was put in the most beautiful updo you'd ever seen. Jirou stuck around a bit longer to talk while you did your make up. You were happy to have her around, she lightened the mood, making you a bit more excited about going out tonight.

Taking the dress with you to the bathroom that connected to your room you changed, having Jirou zip the back for you. You could feel your heart beating loudly against your chest as you looked in the mirror, the dress looked absolutely beautiful, fitting you perfectly. You swallowed the lump in your throat, feeling overwhelmed by the gratitude for the dress and how it made you look.

"I'll be right back, I need a water, want one?" Jirou asked, as she turned to your door.

"Yes, please," your eyes didn't move from your reflection as you took in the dress' design. This was the first time you'd tried it on and you hadn't expected it to be so perfect.

You took a moment, putting on any finishing touches, fixing your hair, making sure the pieces where still where they should be. One strand kept falling into your face, but you figured that couldn't be helped.

There was a light knock on your door, you figured it was Mina or Jirou returning with the water.

"Come in."