❦ SESSIONS ❦ WITH ❦ LOVE❦

Chapter 30

|Sorrowful departure|

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The sound of the gun being fired echos into my ear and I close my eyes and wait for the pain to take over my body. Yet, as I wait, I realize that the pain is not coming. It's not there. Opening my eyes, I look down at myself to see that I'm not bleeding, and I have not been shot. Confused I look up to see what is happening. Standing not far from me, it's Ace with the gun pointed at me, he had fired the gun and a shot had been lodged into something.

It is only when I look down to the ground that I notice just what the bullet had hit or rather who. The shock in the air seems to make time disappear. Time does not take us into reality as for only a second we all look down at her. She got shot. In anger, I raise my gun and shoot Ace in the leg, letting him fall down to his feet and drop his gun. Signaling my men to take him, they do so and take him away. I kneel down beside her and find the bullet's entrance wound.

There is too much blood leaking from her chest, it's too much. I find the sorrow to take over me without knowing why as I try to press on her wound. "Get the doctor!" I order my men, I need to get her some medical assistance, or she won't make it. She's already gasping for her. I think the bullet may have ruptured her lung, and she's barely able to breathe because of the fluid build up. "Trina, we're going to get you a doctor, but you have to stay awake" I say to her, noticing how she's slowly slipping into unconsciousness.

If she does, that then there is a chance that she may never wake up again. I need her alive. She is not just Leanna's best friend or just my best assassins, she has become a friend to me. I do all that I can to put pressure on the wound but without a doctor to see if I can move her, there is little that I can do. "Where is the fucking doctor!?" I yell at them, trying to keep her alive, most of my men are barely doing anything at all. Looking back down at her, I see that she has started to cry.

It is not only a sign of pain but also that she knows she will not make it, she has given up. "No. Trina, you will not die today. I won't allow it. Think of the future, think of your child" I say to her. If she thought that her pregnancy could be hidden from me then she is wrong. It is my specialty to observe people and their behavior, she is carrying a child. Now, she is not only living for one but for two. And even for four if I can add myself and Leanna to that list, and 'm certain that Ace would want her alive as well.

She is gasping for air, there is not much that she has left. The doctor then arrives and pushes me away. The sound woman that I would ever allow to push me away, she knows her limits and knows the cost of it as well. She does not care, only does her job and well. Which is why I keep her around. Covered in blood I stand up. "We need to vote her quickly, without the proper tool, I can't tell if the bullet has ruptured an artery" She speaks, without looking at me.

I lift Trina up into my arms, and then we move through the walls, running as fast as I can towards the medical room. Which is on the other side of the house. When all of this is over, I need to remind myself to have a medical room on every side of the house, just in case something like this happens again, or if Leanna is hurt. I will never allow pain to strike at her for a long time, never in my life will she feel pain eat her alive.

I run with Trina in my arms with the doctor behind me until we make it to the medical room. Lying her down on the bed, the doctor begins to examine her. "It's better if you were to leave the room" She speaks to me, her mind focused on something else. I nod and walk out of the room. "Stand here and assist if needed!" I harshly order my men and they nod. Two old them stand by the door while four of them sit by the door. Others just leave, for they are not needed and know that.

The anger inside me is only fueling the beast that lives there, and it wants blood, his blood, and it is ready to strike at him in any way if I need to. Walking towards the basement where my men have put him in, I find that I will not go easy on hi. I won't kill him. Not today. Yet, soon his death will be brought to him, in the most painful way possible. Ace may have been my best friend, but he will not earn a just death. His betrayal earned him that.

As I'm walking the hallway, I'm met with a surprise that I had not expected to see, but I should have guessed that she would be able to break out of the room. "What are you doing here?" I ask her, but when I look at her face, I notice that there is so much anger and yet so much sadness and worry in her eyes. My heart melts when I see her. Leanna runs over to me and does not waste any time to wrap her tiny arms around me and squeeze my torso as tightly as she can.

Once she has broken the hug she looks at me, with tears in her eyes, as if she knows exactly what has happened and what took place. Taking a closer look at her, I see that her hands are covered in blood, her blood. It feels like I have been stabbed it's the sharpest knife in the world, over and over again to my heart, to know that she is hurting. All I want is to take her pain away, to feel the pain that she feels so that she doesn't have to. Leanna doesn't deserve the pain that she feels.

A tear rolls down from her eye. "Please don't let her die" She whispers to me, and it sounds like she's breaking old the inside. I don't waste any time to wrap my arms around her again and held her as she cries. Neither one of us care that much that we are both covered in blood and look disgusting right now. None of it matters at the moment. I hold her in my arms, she's safe and everything is all right. "I won't, I promise you, that I won't let her die. She won't die" I say to her.

Not certain if I am trying to convince her or myself or even both of us. I saw how the bullet was close to her heart, if she is not dead already then I highly doubt that she has much time left. With the amount of blood that cam out of the wound, I know it had hit an artery. How bad it would be, I don't know, but survival? She has little odds to survive. But, I won't let Trina die. She is not only carrying a child, but she is my love's best friend, and I might say, she is my friend.

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My heart is breaking in two. I heard the gun go off before, I had only just made it out of my room. I heard the shot echoed through the hallways. It was too far away from me, yet I had heard it. I felt the fear want to swallow me up until I was nothing and I hate that feeling. Not knowing who had been shot or what had happened then I heard another shot follow right after and a scream from Ace, I heard his voice. I saw men take him away, he kept muttering that he had shot her. That he had shot Trina.

My world came crashing down at me when he said that. When he said that she was dying before his eyes and he kept apologizing to me and to himself when he saw me stand there. The rage that had been inside me all went away, and it was as if I had been hit by this boulder of sadness, that I started to feel like everything came crashing down at me. Now, even when his arms are around me, I feel horrible inside. Like the world is just falling apart and there is nothing that I can do about it.

"It's all right, Leanna, I'm here, it's all right" Silas mutters to me, but I think that he's trying to make himself feel better. I feel like he's in shock. I think that this has never happened to him before and everything is just so hard for him to process. Silas has never been betrayed like this before and losing someone that he cares about is weighing heavily upon him. Ace was his best friend and had been for years, he did not want to lose him.

Now, he has lost his best friend and might lose someone else, and I think that shock has taken him somewhere else. All that I can do is hold him and try to make him feel all right. Even when I feel so frightened that I just want to bury myself in a hole, where no one will be able to find me again. I feel like I just want to disappear. But, I won't. I am going to stay here with Silas. It is for both our sake. Something awful happened, and we are both affected by it.

I know that neither one of us can be considered normal, as we are not normal and never will be. We are who we are and there is no one that can ever change that. Neither one of us sees the world like everyone else. I know that death is beautiful and that painting a picture out of blood is the best feeling in the world, yet now I find that blood is the most hideous thing in the world. Because it is trying to take my best friend away from me, where I will never be able to see her again.

We sit down on the floor and just hold each other. Letting the feelings all out. I don't know if he is crying, but I am. The tears just won't stop. The sadness inside my chest is far too much for me, and I can't do this anymore. I need to let it all out. My feelings of anger, rage, sadness, happiness, everything is being let out. I'm not even sure that it can ever stop, and I'm not even certain that I want it to stop. I want the pain to go away, but it won't go away any time soon.

Time has stopped as it is just the two of us. We don't need words nor anything else. All we need is each other. The pain that both of us have been through is all going out, and we are forgiving each other for what we have done. If there is anything that I can do now, then it is letting my anger go away. Forgive Silas for what he did to me before. Because it is only now that I see that life is short, and he can be taken away from me in a blink of an eye.

This moment right here seems endless and yet at the same time I feel like it is so short. That at any second now, something terrible is going to happen. I don't want anyone I love to die. Trina is my best friend, she has just started to become happy after the things that happened to her, she does not deserve to die in the manner that she is now. She should die at an old age with the people that she loves around her, with a smile on her face and joy in her heart.

Why can't she have that? Silas holds me tight, but I need to him to hold me forever. Because, I never know when or where I can lose him as well. I can't lose him. I can't. I love him so much. Silas has started to whisper things into my ear, but I don't hear it. I don't hear anything. All that I can focus on his letting everything out of me. No matter what it is. Even the voices seem to disappear away from me, as I let them go as well. I just want to hold onto the people that I love.

He lifts me up and carries me somewhere, I'm far too lost to even see where nor do I care about it. I want to know what is happening to Trina but at the same time I find that the sorrow and the fear in my heart is trying to prevent me from knowing. To know that death has taken her away from me that I will never see her again. The fear that strikes me is far too powerful. I feel that I can't handle it. I'm not strong like they are, I'm not strong like Trina is.

She's strong, and I know that she can survive this, that she will come out of this better and more powerful than she was before. Unfortunately, I'm not as strong as she is, and I don't think that I will come out as strong. I've always been weak. Hidden behind the voices and the anger inside me, but now, I've let it all out. I've let them go. I can't hear them anymore, I can't feel them anymore. They're gone. I wonder if I will go away as well. I wonder if I'm going to die as well.

The darkness is trying to take me away, and it is succeeding. My eyes meet the face of the man that I love, but it is slowly being taken away by the darkness. It is taking me away into a world that I don't want to go to. Yet, I'm not strong enough to fight it, I'm not strong enough to be able to fight against the darkness and stay with the light. I can't do this anymore. It hurts so much. I just want the pain to end, I need it to end. With that as my last thought, the darkness has taken over me and I fall into the unknown of the dark.