《Zodiac Shit [book 3]》The Signs as Things Cats Do

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licking their butt on your bed all night long

the dopey little noise they make when they're happy that goes "prrrr-OOP!!"

busting out into a high speed run for no reason??? where is the fire???

shitting *in front* of their litter box to let you know it's not up to code and they want it cleaned

chirping at birds in hopes of luring them to their deaths

rolling over for you to pet them and then attack when you do

puking literally everywhere

bringing your dead animals, because you know, happy birthday

hiding under things and then popping out and smacking you, giving you a heart attack

waking you up in the middle of the night by sitting on your face and suffocating you

"kneading" your leg constantly even though it HURTS

purposely tripping you in the middle of the night and then running off

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