The rain is bitterly cold on the football pitch, and with forty minutes left in practice, our coach takes pity on us. My fingers are numb, and I have to take a scorching hot shower in the changerooms just to get the circulation back in my body.

Afterwards, as I jog to the car, I consider popping to the shops to pick up a few odds and sods for the house before collecting Chloe. Most weeks, I've left her there for the whole of the match or practice, and sometimes a bit more. They're always happy to have her, especially since I haven't extended their unsupervised visits beyond Sundays. Lately, I've been wavering on that. Other than them taking a year to turn up, do I have a good reason to pen them in so tightly?

With the shit January weather, I'm eager to get home to Joey and Paige to enjoy some naptime shenanigans with the woman who consumes my every waking thought. Today, Toby and Flora will get a bit less time with Chloe, but maybe I can drop her round during the week while I take Joey to the shops to make up for the change.

When I turn down their street, there's another car in the laneway, and immediately my gut twists at the thought of them having someone here during their visit. Could be anyone, since I don't recognize the vehicle. This sinking feeling in my chest could be nothing. But as I'm climbing out of my car in the misty rain, the front door opens. None of them have seen me yet, but a knife has been driven into my chest.

In the doorway, Flora is holding Chloe and Imogen is cradling Chloe's face, raining kisses on her cheeks. It's clear that Imogen is no stranger to Chloe by the way she giggles and tries to grab Imogen in return. A familiar game.

A fucking betrayal.

Bloody hell. The wankers have gone behind my back, just as Tejinder said they would.

"Oi," I call. My heart beats hard in my chest. "What the fuck is this?"

Flora jumps, and Imogen steps back as though I've burned her. It's only Chloe whose face lights up in recognition and not an ounce of contrition.

"You're here early." Flora is pale, and her expression brims with shock.

I shoulder past Imogen, and I yank Chloe out of Flora's arms before I swing the rucksack I sent with her onto my shoulder.

"You won't be seeing her again," I say to them as I stomp out of the house. Chloe lets out a wail in my arms, and I'm sure I'm scaring her. The number of times I've lost my temper around her could be counted on one finger—right now. This is it. My rage is barely contained. The one thing I asked for, and they couldn't honor it. Such a fool to believe they'd keep their word.

"Ash." Toby's voice mirrors my anger. What the fuck does he have to be angry about?

"No," I say, and I whirl on them outside. The rain has eased, but it's still bloody freezing, and the drizzle mimics my misery. "We agreed she wasn't to see her."

"I'm her mother," Imogen says. "Ash, you can't stop me from seeing her."

"What a load of bollocks," I say, and I turn to her as Chloe cuddles into my neck, hiding her face. "You could have seen her whenever you wanted if you'd only asked. If you'd only done anything a decent mother would have done."

"You don't even know—" Imogen says.

"You're right. I don't, and I don't care to. You left. Forfeited your rights. If I have to hire a solicitor to prove that, I will. As for you two," I say, pointing at Flora and Toby. "Never again. I'll never trust either of you again. Say your goodbyes because you won't be seeing Chloe anymore."

"I didn't forfeit anything. You don't have the money to hire anyone," Imogen says.

"I do," I say. "I've got enough, and if I have to spend it on that, so be it."

"I told you," Toby says. "He's shagging the woman he's supposedly nannying for. She's quite well off, and I reckon he's well paid for the work he does."

Never in my life have I understood the expression of seeing red more than in this moment. If Chloe wasn't pressed so tightly against my neck and making whimpering noises at a level only I can hear, Toby would be flat on the ground. No doubt I'd have given him a good rollicking. What he's implying about me and about Paige is out of order. Frustration and anger are swirling inside me, a dangerous cocktail. If I don't get out of here, I'll be so drunk on my emotions I'll say or do something I can't take back.

Rather than responding to Toby, I stride to my car to throw the rucksack in the back before being deliberately gentle with Chloe as I place her in the car. But I'm tightly strung, and she must sense it because when we make eye contact, there are tears in her eyes, and her chin wobbles.

"Oh, love," I whisper, and I brush my thumb against her cheek. "It'll be alright. I promise."

When I close the door, Imogen is there, and she grabs my arm before I can get into the driver's seat.

"I won't let you stop me from seeing her."

I snort and shake her off. My responses are vast, and none of them are appropriate for Chloe's ears. No matter what I think of Imogen, I can't be treating her like rubbish around Chloe. I've read enough online articles to know I don't want my daughter dating arseholes because I didn't set a good example. For Chloe's sake, I can tamp down my anger and be civil.

Once I'm inside the car, I start it, and Imogen bangs on my window, her frustration clear. With deliberate calmness I roll down my window, and I stare at her.

"Do you want to scare our daughter?"

Imogen takes a step back from the car and glances at Chloe in the backseat. "We need to talk."

"Not with Chloe here." I could go so much further, but I don't.

"Fine." Imogen tucks her long black hair behind her ears. "You'll have to face me at some point."

I roll my eyes and throw the car in reverse. "That's not my problem." I reverse out of the laneway, and as I head home, my hands are shaking, and my heart won't return to normal.

After all this time, I finally came face-to-face with Imogen, and I still haven't got a clue how I feel.

~ * ~

When I get back to the house, I carry Chloe in the door and set her on her feet. She runs to the living room and is in Paige's lap when I peek in the door. I want to pretend like everything is fine, but I'm not sure how.

"I need a shower," I say. "Mind putting the kids down?"

"Joey is already down," she says, and she tries to catch my eyes, but I can't look at her. As soon as I do, she'll know, and I don't know what to say yet. About any of it.

Before Paige can comment or ask any questions, I head for the stairs and take them two at a time. In the bathroom, I shed my clothes and I stand under the steaming hot water, wishing Imogen hadn't returned. At the back of my mind, her reappearance was as much of a ticking time bomb as Paige leaving England, but having her turn up now is hard to process. What's best for Chloe? What's best for me? Are the two even remotely the same?

For the last few weeks, Paige and I have blurred the lines even further between employer and employee. Not that there's been much of a line between us for a while, but we've stopped even pretending one exists.

By the time I get out of the bathroom, the only bedroom door still open is Paige's, and I know I should talk to her, tell her everything. Maybe even ask for some advice. Saying Imogen is back out loud feels like it changes too much, even if I'm not sure what.

With just my towel draped around my hips, I wander to Paige's door and lean against the frame. She's lying in her bed reading one of her management books that she's been inhaling since she decided to research a bunch of HR policies for work. After so many months together, I know all of that and so much more.

"Practice must have been cold," Paige says, and she sticks a random slip of paper into her book before closing it and setting it on the nightstand. "Did the shower warm you up, or do you still need some help?" She gets off the bed and runs her fingertips along the edge of my towel.

When she glances up at me, I'm torn between being honest or pretending the encounter with Imogen didn't happen. Her blue eyes scan my expression, and her forehead puckers with concern.

"Part of you is definitely into the idea of being warmed up, and the other part of you definitely is not. What's going on?"

I take a deep breath, and everything in me is urging me to lie, to pretend, to avoid. "When I went to pick up Chloe," I say, and I can hear the rough texture of my voice, "Imogen was at her parents'."

"Oh, my god," Paige breathes out, and her hand drops from where it was resting at the edge of my towel. I wish she'd put it back. All the color is gone from her face. "Are you okay?"

"Don't know, really. Not sure what to feel. Definitely angry. Really fucking angry."

"I bet." She takes my hand and leads me to the bed to sit down. "A huge betrayal by her parents, and then, obviously, her as well."

"I told them I wouldn't let them see Chloe anymore, but now..." I shrug, and I'm not sure how to explain any of the emotions warring inside me. Nothing makes sense.

"You shouldn't," Paige says, and I'm a bit surprised by the side she's taken and how forceful her proclamation is. "At least not for a while. She's been seeing Chloe behind your back?"

"Seemed pretty clear that she was, though I never stuck around to chat about it."

"That's really not okay."

It's not, but having Paige be so uncharacteristically upset for me brings me back to centre. For over a year I've wondered why Imogen left, and the only thing I've had is speculation and a gut instinct. As much as I've moved on, a part of me has been stuck in an unproductive place.

I didn't realize Immy was going to leave, and I never saw her unraveling right in front of my eyes, and she must have been. Whether she's the woman I've always believed her to be or the warped version that lives inside Tejinder's head, she wouldn't have left Chloe without a reason. If she's back and she wants to be in Chloe's life, the reason can't be the one I've assumed for so long.

"That makes sense, doesn't it?" Paige gazes up at me. "Keep our distance for a while."

I realize she continued talking while I was lost in thought, and I'm embarrassed to admit I tuned her out.

"Not sure what I'm going to do." But I do know, and I'm just not sure how to tell Paige that I have to speak to Imogen. The situation feels loaded and fraught with emotion.

For Chloe and for me, I need to understand why she left, and why it took her so long to return. Putting off that conversation won't make my questions, or those answers, disappear.

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