"Are you planning on lighting one up anytime soon, or are you just going to keep staring at it?" Brett sounded more amused than anything as we stood on the back porch of Trey's house, an almost unused pack of cigarettes clutched in my hand.

I turned just enough to shoot him a glare, my fingers tightening around the pack. He raised a dark eyebrow at me. "Just asking, man. You've been glaring at them for the past five minutes." He barely hid a smirk before taking a drag at the one between his own lips.

"Don't fucking worry about it." I snapped and palmed the lid of the pack open. Fuck it. I'm not going to stop smoking just because some girl doesn't like it. Fuck that. I ripped out a cigarette, placed it between my lips and raised the lighter to the end.

But it's Rose.

"You've got to be fucking kidding me." The flash of anger that rose in my chest as I slammed the cig back into the paper pack and thrust the lighter into my jacket pocket was hot and vicious.

"So... you're not going to smoke with me?" The chuckle in the douche bag's voice only made that angry flash worse, and I flipped him off before shoving the pack into my other pocket.

"Fuck off, you overgrown prick."

"For being some freaky smart kid, you sure have a shitty vocabulary." Trey announced at the backdoor, his tone almost as amused as Brett's. "Try saying something besides 'fuck' every time you talk, Rex. People might not be so scared of you."

I rolled my eyes before turning to face him, my hand clutching the small Bic lighter in my pocket like my life depended on it. It was barely enough to choke down the anger raging inside my chest. I needed to fucking hit something. I needed a fight. It's been a whole week and I was close to putting my fist through a wall-again.

"I don't fucking want to."

"Rose doesn't like it."

My hand fisted around the lighter, red flaring across my vision. "I don't give one flying fuck."

"Now that's your biggest lie today."

I pushed off the porches railing, that angry bubble only growing in my chest. "You don't know shit, Trey."

I shoved past him, my shoulder slamming him out of the way as I stormed into the house. I didn't need any one of the them reminding me just how much my actions the past week and a half revolved around that fucking girl. Even if they were right.

Especially after today. Things had gotten too close. I was enjoying her company too much. She got a little sick and I was a fucking puppy trying to make everything better! And fuck it I let her hold my hand the other night too. That was bad-It was getting bad. I couldn't let her get that close. I couldn't.

"I know you like the girl." Trey sighed behind me, that humorous tone from before gone as his too-huge-for-normal-teenager's body followed hot on my heels.

"Big fucking whoop." I snarled as I ripped through the kitchen and headed straight for the front door. "All you fucks like her, otherwise she would have been long gone by now."

She should have been long gone by now. They didn't understand how fucked up we all were-didn't understand how badly I wanted to keep that from her.

That anger in my chest only grew. God, I hoped his mom wasn't home. I didn't have time to deal with that parental worrying bull-shit. I never had before, and I didn't have the patience to handle it now. But that didn't mean I wanted the fury to boil over and have me yell at her.

This is fucking ridiculous.

"No, Rex. You like her, it's not fucking hard to see."

I didn't understand why all the blood suddenly drained from my face, or why my steps faltered when I was so fucking close to the front door-from escaping this fucking conversation. "I don't know what you're talking about." I grumbled around the angry bubble rising to my throat.

How I felt was none of his fucking business, nothing about me was. But that piss poor huge fuck was always trying to shove his nose into my business. Rosalyn wanted to be his friend, fine, whatever, but that didn't fucking mean he could talk to me about her. We weren't fucking girls. She wasn't his to talk about.

She wasn't mine either.

"Quit that shit." He snapped and followed angrily after me all the way to the front porch. "Yeah, just run away instead of facing me, Rex. Like you do with all your problems."

"What did you just say?" I turned to face him, that fury inside finally bubbling over before I could escape to my car. His bright eyes were narrowed in anger, his jaw clicked shut as we squared off on his porch.

"You heard me." He snarled in my face, his shoulders tensing as I stepped up against him.

My hands were shaky fists at my side. Trey was the only one I had ever met who stood a chance in a fight against me, though we hardly ever did. No matter how much I hated admitting it, he was the only family I ever had.

And he was pissing me the fuck off.

"You and the other fucking idiots were the ones who wanted to bring her in, who wanted to be her friend. I wanted nothing to do with her."

I was barely aware of both the Dimajios creeping onto the porch now, or of how loud my voice was as it ricocheted through the front door. I didn't fucking care. The anger was boiling over, Trey was in my face, and all I wanted to do was shove my fist through that smug look.

"Own up to your fucking self and admit you like the girl-"

"I don't fucking like her!"

"Oh yeah?" He sneered, a smirk pulling on his lips. "Fine, you don't like her. No big deal. There shouldn't be a problem then when I fuck her-" My fist went flying into his face before I realized I even moved.

He wants to die? Good, I'll end it for him.

But he decided he wanted to fight back, and then we were both slamming rock hard fists into the others face, stomach, chest-anywhere we could reach above the waist line. Below was completely off limits, it was an unspoken rule and whatnot.

"Boys stop! Boys!"

I was vaguely aware of Trey's mom, Maggie, shouting at us from the open door, but our fight had stumbled into the front lawn and I wasn't planning on stopping anytime soon. Not until I had fought all the anger out of me. Then Denton spoke up from the porches steps.

"Buttercup... Oh shit, you really shouldn't be here."

You have got to be fucking kidding me.

My eyes were... leaking, and no matter how hard I tried to make them stop they wouldn't. I knew Rex didn't like me, knew it from the very beginning. I even told myself that very fact repeatedly but hearing him admit it out loud to everyone was-heart shattering.

And Trey had said he wanted to... to do something that friends didn't do. That Jason had said he wanted to do. Now they were fighting-because of me. Because all I do is tear people apart and drag them down.

I knew this would happen, or at least some version of it, but I had let the hope seep in instead. I wanted to believe, for as long as I could, that we could all be friends. That Rex would actually like me one day, even if it was just to a tolerable point. I thought I would have had a longer time to pretend.

"Buttercup... Oh shit, you really shouldn't be here."

I tore my leaking eyes from the two best friends tearing into each other apart on the grass. The look in Denton's blue eyes was pitying. I didn't want him to pity me. I didn't deserve it. I knew none of this had been real, knew it from the very start. I had just been stupid enough to believe it could have been.

"I-I know." Even my voice sounded like it was leaking, like it was pouring out every hope I had. I dropped my eyes away from the two identical pairs watching me and squeezed the soft hoodie to my chest.

"I just wanted to return this..."

For some reason my voice wouldn't rise above a whisper, and my hands were shaking as I turned slowly to the small silver car behind me. I didn't look over at Rex or Trey, though the sounds of fists hitting something solid didn't waiver-even with, who I assumed was Trey's mom, trying desperately to get them to stop.

I clutched the hoodie to my chest one final time before laying it out against the car's hood. I hated the hot tears I could feel streaking down my cheeks, but I didn't wipe them away as I took off the jacket he had given me barely a few days earlier. It wasn't right to keep this now, not when I couldn't pretend anymore. I laid it next to the hoodie, my fingers clinging to the soft leather for another moment.

I just thought I would have more time...

"Rose, wait-" Brett called beside his brother as I turned to leave, but I just shot him a small smile and shook my head. This was over, all of it.

I wrapped my arms tightly around my stomach, like that would stop the pain ripping through me as I hurried quickly out of Trey's driveway. I never should have tried to return the hoodie. I could have pretended longer if I just stayed home and watched Netflix. I wouldn't know.

I wanted to run, to lock myself in my room and bury into my bed until all the pain in the world disappeared, but my feet refused to move any faster. This was all just a dream, it had to be. Rex said-he said he wanted to protect me, that we could be friends.

It was a lie. I knew it was, but I thought- I hoped- I could feel the Dimajio's eyes on me all the way back to my house, but no one tried to stop my retreat.

This is what I've always known. This is what I deserved.

I couldn't do it. No matter how badly I wanted to, no matter how much I knew I would need it today. I just couldn't do it. I wiped the one lone, angry, frustrated tear off my cheek that had escaped as I stared at the prescription bottle in my locker.

Just one.

Just one pill wouldn't hurt. I used to take them all the time, every day, and nothing bad ever happened. They made me feel better, they numbed the pain-took it all away. I wanted that. I didn't want the feelings anymore. I just wanted it all to go away. I wanted the numbness.

So why couldn't I force my hands to do the few simple movements that would put the medicine in my system? One or two pills past my lips, a sip of water, and then blissful emptiness.

Because Rex doesn't want me to.

But he also didn't like me, he didn't care. Only Luce cared, and she picked up the prescription whenever I needed a new one. So, they weren't bad, right?

"Rose..."

My back went rigid at his voice, and the water I had been forcing from my eyes all morning threatened to spill out now. I pushed the bottle behind some binders before raising my bag to my shoulders.

"I have to get to class." I murmured softly as I closed the locker door and turned away from Rex.

I didn't want to face him, to look into his beautiful chestnut eyes and be reminded of the lie once again. I couldn't pretend anymore, no matter how much I wanted to. He didn't like me, and Trey-I thought Trey wanted to be my friend. I was wrong about that too.

"Wait, I need to explain." His voice was softer than I had ever heard it, but I didn't dare look back at him. Not even when that large hand of his reached out and wrapped gently around my wrist.

I had to choke down the tightness in my throat. "You don't have to explain. I understand." And I did. I knew how he felt from the very beginning. I was just the idiot trying to pretend I didn't.

"No, you don't, you really don't. What you heard-"

The bell ringing for first period interrupted what I was sure was just going to be another reason to leave me crying that morning. I thought I got all the tears out the night before, but no matter how much I told myself to get over it, there were always more threatening to slip down my cheeks.

"I can't be late for class again. Luce will be mad."

I went to pull my wrist out of his grasp, but his fingers only tightened as he stepped closer. "Then let me walk you." His voice almost sounded... pleading. Which didn't make any sense. He didn't like me, he didn't want to be my friend. He shouldn't feel like he had to plead for anything from me. I wasn't important.

I hesitated, my heart pulling in two completely different directions. The louder part was urging me to agree, to pretend a little while longer that some part of him cared. That Trey wanted to be my friend and that Rex could like me one day. The smaller part, the rational part, was telling me to say no. To guard my weak heart and not let those dark, haunting eyes hurt me anymore.

Obviously, I ignored that part.

I didn't say anything, which he took as confirmation, and fell slowly into step at my side. My first class was just around the corner at the end of the hall, so I didn't have to choke down the pain for long as that warm hand of his stayed wrapped softly around my wrist.

He stayed silent the entire time, even though when I dared glance over at him, his handsome face was pulled into a frown, those dark eyes practically glaring at the floor. For someone who got into a fight the night before, he didn't appear to have one visible injury. It made me worry for Trey.

I forced my gaze away again. I hope Rex didn't feel like he had to protect me still. Jason was out of school and the other boys stayed completely clear of me every time I spotted them in the hall. There was no reason he had to walk with me anymore, no reason any of them had to.

I wanted to run straight into the class as soon as we reached the door, but that grip held me still as I went to pull away from him. My heart hammered in my chest. I didn't want to hear what he had to say. I knew it wasn't going to be anything good.

"Look, Rose, I- I..." He let out a long sigh before shaking his head and glancing out at the crowded hall.

I gripped tightly onto my bag's strap with my free hand and tried to force my eyes away from his handsome face, though that seemed impossible. This was probably that last time we would ever talk to each other, and I wanted to absorb as much of him as I could.

"It's alright, Rex." I interjected softly and finally eased my wrist out of his grasp. His chestnut eyes flickered down at the action and watched with a narrow gaze as I wrapped that hand around my other strap.

"I know you don't like me. I didn't mean to make you feel like you had to be my friend. I'm sorry." My eyes finally flickered away from his and dropped to the floor. I was never good at goodbyes, they were so permanent. They were an ending.

"Are you fucking serious right now?"

The sudden anger zapping through him and his hard tone made my gaze widen and snap back up to his. "What?" He took a step away, his large hand reaching up to run angrily through his hair as his jaw clenched shut.

What did I say?

"I literally hurt your feelings so bad that you gave my jacket back and cried all night-you look like you've been crying all night. I'm the biggest fucking ass in this world, and you're trying to tell me you're sorry."

"I-I..." I didn't know what to say. He looked like he was about to punch someone, and for a moment it looked like he wanted that person to be himself.

Rex scoffed and ran that large hand of his through his hair one more time as the final bell for class sounded. "You should get to your seat before the teach counts you absent." He practically growled before gripping tight onto his own backpack and began turning away.

I watched with slightly wide eyes as he paused, let out one long, sad sigh, before turning back to face me. My breath hitched in my throat as he leaned down, that beautiful mouth nearly brushing my ear. He was so close-

"I do like you, Roza." Then those ridiculously soft lips of his pressed a firm kiss to my temple. "A lot."

My heart completely stopped beating at the touch of his mouth against my skin, and those butterflies I was quickly becoming so familiar with erupted in my stomach.

"Wait for me after class, yeah?" He murmured against my skin before pulling completely away.

I felt like a wide-eyed, gaping fish as he stared down at me for one long moment, until I forced myself to give him a nod. It was the only acknowledgment my body would allow me to give. He gave a slow, rather jaw-dropping smile.

"Get to your seat."

Then he turned and headed back down the hall without another word. I couldn't move, my legs refused to cooperate. Rex Turner just kissed my temple. I felt like I was going to faint.

Rex ended up walking me to second period, and third, and fourth, and to all the other classes until the end of the day. I had no idea why he felt like he had to, but I wasn't complaining. He had kissed me-literally put his lips to my temple and kissed me. It wasn't on the lips, but it was more than anything I could have ever hoped for from Rex Turner.

He hated people, hated talking to them, interacting with them, touching them, and I've definitely never seen him kiss someone before. But he did to me, and he had practically been glued to my side every minute we weren't in class. It confused the heck out of my brain, and heart, but I liked it. I liked it a lot.

He was still acting like his usual gruff and grumpy self, but there was more than one occasion where I glanced over at him and he gave me a soft smile. Plus, he started holding my wrist again after lunch, and even dropped that grip to my hand as we walked to his car at the end of the day.

Whatever pain I had been feeling the night before and that morning had almost completely evaporated-almost.

I hurried to my locker before lunch to grab my food, without Rex, and ran into the one other person who had shattered my heart the night before. And I thought I was doing such a good job avoiding him.

"Hey Princess."

I slammed my locker shut in surprise, my eyes wide as I gripped my lunch to my chest for dear life. "T-Trey!" I stammered as he leaned sheepishly against the wall in front of me, a worried frown pulling at his lips. "You scared me!"

He gave me a soft smile, which quickly disappeared as he winced. I was right about him looking a lot worse than Rex. His bottom lip as split open, and his nose looked a little more crooked than normal. At least he didn't have any black-eyes. I watched as he leaned slowly off the wall, his hands disappearing into his jacket pockets.