"…As if it were a secret yearning deep inside of me, I was pulled forward by that sensation. And before I knew it, I had already come here, where you found me."

…

We began to move.

After resting for some time, we began the journey to find our way back home. To what direction however, had been left all up to Canaria.

"I can backtrack us to where I first woke up but anything after that I won't be able to help," she told me with a certain confidence in her voice. "Since the sky doesn't move here, it's pretty easy to figure out. I woke up about seven and a half kilometers that way."

To her credit, I really did leave it all up to her. Because, as it turned out to my complete and utter astonishment, she had a near perfect memory when it came to remembering the position of the stars. And these crystals up at the top of the cavern were a good enough approximation for them. She was able to immediately point up to a patch of the sky and figure out where we needed to go.

"That's… incredible actually."

"Wait, really?" Her voice perked at my praise.

"Yeah, really."

"How come? Tell me?"

"I just assumed you to be the more clumsy type, so I never expected you to be this proficient at something like this. That's all."

"Back when I was still in school, I used to be part of an amateur astronomy club," she explained to me, "but in Singapore, it's hard to make out anything but the brightest stars out at night. Still, it never diminished my love for the activity and, back when I was young, I would be staring at star charts during the day to memorize them and staring at the skies during the night to try to spot where the dots on those charts would be."

"Honestly, that just makes it even more amazing."

"Hehe~♪" She simply hummed with my praise.

"But you know what else about you makes me even more impressed?"

"What? What? Am I really that impressive?"

"Yeah… It's seriously impressive just how long you managed to go on for while still believing you were in a dream."

I laughed heartily. I had to admit, after listening to her side of the story, it was difficult not to be in awe. Personally, I would have realized something was off the moment something was… well, off.

"Wait! You have to understand from my point of view how I couldn't help it! When you take into consideration what it would have meant if it wasn't a dream, it makes sense! Everything makes total sense in context!"

She continued to emphasize the importance of context and I did not argue with her. She made a fair point. We all had different ways of coping and, had she lost her cool and panicked instead, things could have ended a lot worse for her. While there was no way to predict how differently our past actions could affect our present, since she was still safe and sound now, I had nothing else to say on that matter.

Still, there was something that bothered me. It was that primary sensation she felt tugging her forward. She continued to feel it even now and it constantly urged her to keep going towards an unknown horizon. I wondered, if it was anything like the sensation all Aves had encoded into their genetic memory? For them, it was a beacon sense that always pointed towards a place in the open oceans where nothing stood. Yet there were endless folktales speaking of an ancient nesting ground which all Aves descended from.

Although she was firm in stating that the sensation was not a dangerous one, I found it difficult to share the belief. While I had not said it out loud, I suspected that it could have been the very reason she was brought out here in the first place.

"But to think you didn't take a single break after walking that much…" I murmured, looking back to the past. "If I remember, we only ran for about five city blocks or so when we met. Were you only pretending to be winded when I met you?"

"No no, I was actually really tired back then. I thought I was going to throw up from running so hard." She waved her hands rapidly as if to deny herself a heavy accusation.

"Really?"

"Yes, really really!" She answered again. "It's just that… things have felt a little different ever since I got here."

"Different? Different how?"

"Different like I'm living through an out-of-body experience. It's like my mind has taken a step back from my body and I'm just experiencing everything through another person's point of view. The reason why I never felt a need to take a break was because I wasn't the one getting tired. Even now, as I'm talking to you, it feels like I'm just living through an event of me talking to you."

Though she tried to explain as best she could, Canaria struggled to put herself into words. She did not give up trying however.

"Even though my feet ached at the beginning, once I forgot about it, the discomfort disappeared into the back of my mind until I was reminded about it. Or the cold: although I started out thinking it was pretty chilly over here, my body temperature never dropped to a point where I shivered or became numb. And my vision too— I've never had great night vision but once my eyes adjusted, I was suddenly able to see everything out to the farthest reaches of this cavern without trouble."

Putting her hand out in front of herself, Canaria reached for the skies. After a brief pause, she looked back down and then spoke again.

"Maybe it's to do with the air over here? It does make me feel a little stronger every time I breathe it in. It might be weird for me to say this but, even though it's kind of stale, the air just feels more satisfying to breathe— like if I've been wearing a mask my entire life and it's now finally off."

"Hm…"

I fell into a thoughtful silence after taking in all of what she said. Could a person really just ignore their bodily functions and go beyond their limits like that? Even Arcanians, who were tougher and stronger than humans, had their limits and, once it was reached, their bodies would shut down all the same. However, speaking not of Arcanians, Canaria was not one to begin with. She was human. That, I had assessed myself already.

So maybe it was something else entirely. Maybe she was just tougher than she realized or it was some kind of a dissociation disorder. Occam's razor would point to that to be the most logical solution. However… As I suspected, that was something I could not bring myself to accept. It was impossible for me to ignore that little star which remained floating in an all too conspicuous manner right over the girl's bright blue hair.

"Uhm…"

Wearing a difficult expression on her face, Canaria shifted as if dealing with an awkward situation.

"Uhh…"

As she let out another noise, she looked away to the ground shyly. But why though? I failed to pick up on what was going on. Then, after another few dozen strained seconds, she finally reached up with her hand to touch the little star above her head as if trying to cover up an embarrassing part of her own body. Jostling from her touch, the little thing shifted ever so slightly before gently returning to peace at her fingertips.

"Ah… my bad. I didn't mean to stare."

"No, it's okay. There's no need to apologize." Canaria shook her head.

By the time I finally realized what I had done wrong, it had already been too late. I honestly did try my damndest not to stare, but it was impossible not to look. It was a genuine mistake on my part and I apologized to her accordingly, yet contrary to my expectations, she was not mad. She was simply understanding and even laughed afterwards as if I had done something unavoidable.

"I suppose it's hard not to stare or ask questions when it's just floating out there in the open like that. I guess it's about as glaring as the star on a Christmas tree? Or would it be more since you would kind of expect there to be one there? Anny… Ah, that's my best friend. It was her idea for me to wear a hat to cover it up when I go outside. She said that things would be bad for me if I ever got found out in public, how I might even get fired from work or get kicked out of my apartment."

"Your friend is right, you know," I told her simply. While there was a lot more I could have brought up, I wisely chose not to.

"I guess it's a little hard to cover up when I'm only out here with my sleepwear, but I'm sure it'll be fine since it's you, Mister Edmond. You won't tell on me, will you?"

I shook my head and it was good enough for her to take as an answer.

"In hindsight, maybe I should have been more concerned by its sudden appearance, but I suppose Anny ended up being more than worried enough for the both of us, hehe. When she came by my apartment, she dropped both bags she had been carrying and she shut the door behind her right away. She was concerned about me. She really was! And it made me feel really happy knowing that she would worry over me like that, but…"

"But?"

Her expression changed from a soft and delightful one to a dragged out and dispirited frown. So I opened my mouth and urged her to explain.

"It's a complicated feeling. On one hand, it really touched my heart when I realized how worried she was for me. But on the other hand, I realized that it was a joy I felt as a result of me having inconvenienced her. I still don't know how I should feel about this. It's schadenfreude, isn't it, to feel joy from another's misery."

Canaria really did seem saddened about it. However, hearing this confession of hers, I could only cross my arms and sigh a very deep sigh.

"Canaria," I told her, "I'm going to tell you something. You might find it hard to accept, but take it as advice passed down from one generation to the next."

"Yes, Mister Edmond?"

"Sometimes, a person just wants to know that there is someone out there who cares for them. And for some, it might even be all that they could ever want in life— to be cared for, loved for, and cherished for. These feelings are a part of what makes us people, whether we are human or Arcanian doesn't matter. So it's fine to be a little selfish sometimes, because there is no shame in it."

I understood these feelings she spoke of. I understood because I had met Verretheia and she became that someone who cared for me, who loved the unnecessary me, who cherished me, and my life was changed because of it. It did not matter that Canaria's feelings were only on the level of friendship, because true friends were also every bit as important to a person as a life partner.

"I suppose you're right. No, I know you're right, Mister Edmond." Canaria's expression finally softened again. "Maybe you can already tell, but I'm not a very sociable person so it's hard for me to make friends, much less be quick on the uptake on what might or might not be socially accepted. So if you tell me things work like this, then I believe you. I only found it hard to accept, is all. I still find it difficult to."

"You'll get used to it. Eventually. Whether you like to or not."

"It might take a while, I think."

Canaria's laugh was mellow as she spoke.

"You know…"

"What is it?" I asked back.

"I'm glad Anny's around for me and I appreciate her so very much because of it… but she can't always be there by my side— and I wouldn't want her to always be there with me! She's a person of her own and she has her own life and goals she needs to look after. I also know that I need to grow as a person. The world isn't kind enough that I would be able to make it through life if I stay the way I am now, which is why…"

—Canaria's voice dropped to a whisper. It was barely audible even in the damning silence of this place. But through moving my head closer and hearing it, it caused me to feel a tinge sense of embarrassment. It made me feel uneasy as if what I had just heard had put me into an awkward bind.

"…I'm glad I was able to make friends with you, despite all my faults, Mister Edmond. You're a kind person, putting up with me all this time."

But since I had heard it regardless, I could only straighten my back and look up towards the glimmering sky with a defeated gaze I did not want to show her. I was never good at dealing with sappy things. But, rather than reproaching those feelings like something I wanted to throw away, I have since learned to accept it for what it was. Sometimes, the things one had to go through in life were hard and one had to just bite the bullet when the situation called for it.

"Don't be silly. I'm also glad to be your friend, Canaria," I said to her with a firm and solid voice. I made sure there was no ambiguity with my words and I did mean it. As the one with more life experience here, that was my responsibility.

"…Thank you, Mister Edmond."

…

…