Season 1, Episode 6 - The Tree Plot XX - "Chump"

Isaac wasn’t one for being sworn at, especially in a professional setting, so he gathered his things and departed with a farewell. He didn’t hear Reed following him until he arrived outside the building, when he stopped as sounds of heavy panting and footsteps approached him from behind. Reed stumbled toward him, one hand reaching out for him for a brief moment. She then placed both hands on her knees and stopped on the sidewalk.

“Jesus...how the hell are you so fast...I had to run down an entire four flights of stairs...oh my god...”

Reed stumbled again then collapsed on a nearby bench. “Goddamn...cramp cramp cramp...Isaac, you got water or something? No? Alright...”

She sighed and collected herself and looked over at Isaac. “Well, where are you going?”

“Home,” Isaac simply said.

“But why?” Reed asked. She stood up and spread her arms wide. “You heard the man. Our story could be a huge hit.”

“If we change it,” Isaac reminded her.

Reed tilted her head. “Is that so bad?”

“Not really. I explained in the office. It’s just that writing a magazine serial will be a big commitment and I don’t want to commit to it if it’s something I’m not really interested in writing.”

Reed gestured at him with her hands. “But we could get our story published, Isaac. Don’t you want that?”

“You want that,” Isaac corrected her. “And you still haven’t told me why. I really thought it was for the fame.”

Reed waved her arms around. “Why are you assuming it’s about fame? Is it something about me that makes you think that way?”

Isaac resisted the urge to tell her to look in a mirror. “No offense…but c’mon. It’s you.”

When he saw the tired, knowing look in her eyes, Isaac felt bad for saying something like that.

But am I wrong?

Isaac couldn’t tell. The facts were there, but facts and feelings had an odd way of meshing in your mind, preventing you from saying the right words. Isaac chose his next ones carefully.

“If you want me to consider staying, then you need to tell me why you’re so stuck on getting it published.”

Reed lowered her arms. She looked off to the side and stared at the ground; she instinctively reached for her Domino Sword, only to come up empty.

“I told you this before,” she began. “I hate the Domino Sword but I need it. Because Babs was right. What do I really have going for me outside of that stupid sword? We talked about this at the Dojo. I couldn’t name a single thing I liked to do.”

Isaac wanted her to stop looking downwards. “I’ve been thinking about that conversation. I think you’re being too hard on yourself. You have that esoteric interest in dinosaurs and you read Japanimation newsletters. You do have hobbies. And maybe they’re not productive - but, when you really think about it, who says hobbies have to be productive? They’re hobbies. Who says I was right for saying that?”

Reed let out a small chuckle. “You really have changed. But you also haven’t. You might be more flexible in the moment now, but you still believe in protecting your friends and all that, right? Your greater goal. It’s why you work so hard. I really like that about you.”

Isaac just rubbed the back of his neck.

“But me?” Reed continued. “What’s my greater goal? The Domino Sword is the only thing going for me, but I don’t have any ambition with it. You defeated Jackson because you wanted to get stronger to save the nation. I killed Panama because I was ordered to go into a sewer. You defeated Harriet because what she stood for posed a threat to your friends. I killed Roman over seven dollars and seventy-two cents.”

Isaac shook his head. “Sure, overall, I have a goal. But in the heat of the moment of those fights, I defeated both of them because if I didn’t win, people important to me would get hurt. And I bet it was the same for you.”

He stepped forward. “Why are you so hard on yourself all the time?”

Reed scratched her stomach. “I don’t know! I’m not a psychologist.”

Isaac paused at the sudden outburst.

“My parents were always hard on me, so maybe I’m always hard on myself because of it,” Reed said, her voice soft. She looked at her shoes. “I want to be someone, Isaac. I want to have something going for me. And I want it to be something besides the Domino Sword. Something I can look at and feel proud about.”

She rubbed her face for a moment. “And it doesn’t have to be writing. I don’t even like writing all that much. I’d much rather make movies. But writing’s more accessible, so writing it is.”

“But that still doesn’t answer why it has to be published,” Isaac said. “I feel like, even if writing is just a hobby in your free time, you can still call yourself a writer. That goes for any hobby or pastime.”

Reed stretched her arms towards him. “Don’t you get it, Isaac? I want to prove myself. I want to prove to myself that I can do something besides sling Rddhi at people. And I want to prove it to my parents. They only ever judged me by how good I could use the Rddhi. So, maybe, if I show them something else about me, they’ll find a reason to be proud of me.”

She lowered her arms and looked back at the ground. “And, once I finally get a story out there, it’ll be like a real supernova.”

The two kept quiet on that avenue sidewalk for a moment. A breeze pushed caramel-colored leaves off the ground and past them.

Well, I have no idea what she means here by calling it a supernova, but I can piece together the other parts. No wonder her brain feels sick.

Isaac realized Reed’s hands were trembling from having laid it all out in the open like that.

“Thanks for telling me,” Isaac finally said.

Reed looked at him hopefully, lights dancing in her eyes. “So…you’ll stick with me on this?”

Isaac didn’t answer for a moment. He saw her hands tremble again.

“I really can’t commit to something this big,” Isaac answered. “It’ll be multiple hours a day just to write, and even more when it comes to brainstorming and editing. Between the Rddhi and schoolwork, I can’t do it. And, when we worked on this thing, I did most of the writing. Nothing wrong with that. But, if you really want to prove yourself, then maybe you should take charge of this. Us getting to this point was me spinning your propeller. Now, it’s time for you to take off.”

The lights left her eyes.

“But I’ll still help,” Isaac continued. “You ever want to bounce ideas off of me or have me take a look at something, you know where to find me. You know, I had a lot of fun making this story with you-”

“Some friend you are,” Reed objected.

Isaac stopped talking. From the way her brow furrowed, he knew exactly where this would be going.

“Oh, c’mon, Reed-”

“My head kills and I just want to sleep and every day I have to wake up and live in this world we find ourselves in,” she said, her voice breaking every couple of words. “Every day, I have to do it. I said I was going to change! Why don’t I feel better?”

Isaac tried to keep his voice composed. “It’s literally been three days.”

“Then when do I feel better?”

“In the future. Change takes time, with no guarantee of success. You just have to see it out.”

Reed scratched at her stomach harder. “When we talked the other day, I thought I made a breakthrough or something. I said that maybe I kicked the people of the Pond first. But maybe I was wrong. Maybe the people I’m with really have always kicked me around. But I don’t want to go back to seeing things that way. I’d do anything to avoid seeing things like that again.”

“It takes time to change,” Isaac said again. “You can’t change a mindset in three days. It’s a continuous uphill battle until something finally clicks-”

“And when’s finally?”

Isaac felt like this back and forth was going nowhere. “I don’t know, it’s different for everybody-”

Reed interrupted again. “So, I might just spend my life going in circles and circles?”

Before he could answer, Isaac felt an odd sense of deja vu in his head.

Circles and circles. Where have I heard that before? Same thing with continuous uphill battle.

The image of Harriet, drenched in the rain, standing at the bottom of the elevated rail staircase came to his mind.

I get it now, Harriet. I see why you’d dedicate your life to the Second Restorationists. If you’re stuck in a circle and it seems like you can’t get yourself out of there, you’d latch onto anything that could save you.

And that’s when Isaac understood. I wasn’t totally right in my argument with Harriet before we fought. I don’t think I was completely wrong, but I wasn’t completely right, either. I didn’t have a proper understanding of her side of things - I just made an argument that made perfect sense to me, not necessarily to her.

I have a better understanding of the opposite side of things now. The argument I used down in the basement with Harriet wouldn’t really work here either. So, what’s the right argument here?

Wait. Why are we arguing? These are different situations. Both Harriet and Reed are hurting, but Harriet was a drug-smuggling revolutionary while Reed just wants to write a book. I argued with Harriet because I wanted to stop her and show that she was in the wrong. I’m arguing with Reed because I want her to feel better.

Isaac glanced at the ground. Maybe I should’ve tried to make Harriet feel better, too.

“I just want you to feel happy,” Isaac answered, not sure what else to say. “So, I have to believe that one day, the change will click.”

Reed briefly glanced up at him, then her eyes darted back to the ground. She spoke slowly and quietly. “Get lost, Isaac. Some friend you are. Another person leaving me.”

“Most of them you forced away yourself,” Isaac said, trying to keep frustration from growing his voice. “I get that you’re struggling and all but that’s no reason to act like an abrasive jerk all the time. Half of the stuff that happens to you is self-inflicted-”

“I said get lost!” Reed exploded. “I can do this myself! If everyone’s just going to kick me around, then I don’t need any of you!”

Isaac gestured at her. “You’re doing it right now. Don’t force me away, too-”

“I said go home!”

“Hey, stop yelling-”

“I’m not yelling!” she yelled. “We’re done here, Isaac! I’ll prove myself, and then you’ll see! Everyone will see!”

On the one hand, Isaac knew Reed wasn’t exactly in the best of mental states. Yet, at the same time, he really did not want someone yelling at him like that.

He just shook his head then gave her a goodbye nod. “Hope it goes well for you, then. I’ll see you around.”

Reed crossed her arms and her voice didn’t sound all that stable, either. “That’s right, Isaac, you better leave! Just like everybody else does! Classmates, friends, family…you’ll all miss me! You’ll be hung up on me forever!”

Isaac turned around and walked off.

“...for ten years, at least!”

Isaac continued to ignore her. Reed’s voice grew even weaker.

“Isaac…is this really goodbye?”

Isaac didn’t turn back. “It’s goodbye.”

“Goodbye forever?”

“Goodbye forever.”

“Forever-ever?”

“Forever-ever.”