(So...the person that this is about, reads these or at least follows me and will get the notification about this. So, I'm gonna say this now, she hasn't fully left, she is still over every now and then but it still hurts because she is getting older and I feel like I'm an annoying person when I hang out with her now because I'm always trying to talk to her and she is always so tired from the day and the whole thing is just ughhh. But I don't want to say anything because I think it'll be weird because I'm always wanting to hang out and if i tell her I'm scared she is leaving me behind and I'm scared, that she'll think I'm a burden or something. Anyway here is this after me sitting in my room, enjoy this or don't I have no power over you. Sorry for the rant here.)

You knew this was going to happen

You predicted it the moment you met her

You knew she was going to leave

So why didn't you prepare?

You prepare for everything else

Deaths

Fights

Social settings

But you can never seem to prepare for this

These instances

The infamous instances where a person leaves you

But not the quick ghosting

No

They slowly weasel their way out

Like they slowly weaseled their way in

It happens so much that you should be used to it

Used to the hurt

The sorrow

The grief you feel for a death that hasn't come

You should know how to get over

You should know that this happens all the time

That this isn't a one time flunk

That everyone leaves

Because everyone always fucking leaves

They find out the truth

They find out how fucked you are

How much baggage you come with

And how hard it is to understand and deal with you

So they leave

Because staying for them is harder

Even though she was keeping you grounded

She was one of the constants in your life

She was what you waited for every weekend

She was the older sister you needed

And she left

And it's fine

It's always fine

You bounce right back up

Because you have to

Not because you want to

You would rather sit in your room going through crisis

One that you really don't need because you know why they left

But you can't do that

You have to keep on kicking

Boucing back everytime life hits you with something you should expect

But you don't

So you think

You sit and think

Then remember that this all happened after she told you to talk to her

And then you stand

And walk this off

Walk off the hurt

The hurt of being left behind

Again