《Unkillable Loser》Chapter 12: Gods are a Pain
Advertisement
May Sullivan POV:
When I woke up there was chaos. There was a crack going through the air and it made a loud sound like cracking glass as the air around us shattered.
To be frank, this is definitely a dream. I remember nodding off while idiot 1 and idiot 2 were working on their piece of the project which they should have finished forever ago. I would never team up with them if I didn’t know that they always pulled through in the end.
But anyways, I knew I was sleeping, so the air shattering just looked interesting to me as I looked to the side with my head still laid down on the table. I enjoyed this dream that was so clear and interesting.
But then it got darker and only a faint light shined down at me from above. I slowly lifted my head up and stroked my cheek which was sore from lying on the hard table top. That was when I realized.
I FELT my cheek, the soreness and my hand touching it. Not a dream then.
Ah. Then someone is fucking with me. That makes sense. Tony would definitely be pissed off watching me sleep soundly while he was working so hard. I bet this is his doing. Great effects with the air shatter thing, wonder how he pulled that off?
I looked at Tony at that moment and saw him full force slap himself in the face. Jesus, why?
“It's not a dream.”
Ah. I see. He’s pretending to be in shock too. Good actor, but the full force slap was a little overkill. Now I feel more certain this is his doing.
Then from the side I heard another smack and heard Julian yelling profanities. Idiots of a feather. Is it really worth the pain just to screw with me?
As I slowly looked around and saw more and more of the room we were in I finally had a doubt.
Where are we?
There's no way those idiots actually moved me somewhere else right? They know that could easily be considered a crime right?
Advertisement
Wait, there are others here too. Everyone seems confused or dazed. No way this many people bought in just for one prank right? Might as well ask.
“Hey Tony. Am I being pranked?”
Tony laughed at me. This punk actually laughed at my face.
"Don't laugh at meeee. Are you the one who moved me here while I was napping Tony? You shouldn't joke like this with your teammates."
"No May I didn't move you here, didn't you see the air... crack?"
Tony is not that good of a liar. I actually believe him. But that means…
"That wasn't my imagination? Or a dream?"
"No, I'm pretty sure we all saw that. You saw it too, right Julian?"
Tony’s calm voice was keeping my anxiety from spiking for a moment but then something started to buzz in my ear. It started as nothing more than static but quickly became clear. It was an energetic voice. A voice… in my head.
It said:
“Oh my gods, you’re PERFECT!”
So loud.
“I’ve never seen anyone so compatable with holy power! You even have the attitude I like in my followers! So sweet and innocent but with a nice dash of viciousness hidden down deep. Oh, you are easily my new favorite!”
This voice, it’s so loud, and annoying, and it’s breaking my calm. Tony and the others were still talking but I couldn’t even hear them over this stupid voice.
“Awwww, so mean to someone who was complimenting you. I like you! You get my protection. I’ll smite the people who touch you! PURIFICATION BABY!”
Ah fuck I’m going crazy, I can’t even process our situation right now this voice is driving me nuts. And it sounds like it is reading my thoughts.
“I am indeed reading your thoughts, you’re smart too!”
If you can read my thoughts then shut…
The
FUCK
UPPPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!
“...”
Finally, I can breathe. I can think. I don’t think anyone has annoyed me that much in my entire life. I hate it, whatever it is. If I’m turning insane and this is now my life I’m jumping off a bridge now to save myself the headache.
Advertisement
The voice spoke in a much softer (and blessedly quieter) tone.
“I’m sorry… I was just excited is all. I’ve never had someone so in tune with me that they can actually hear me. Please don’t jump off a bridge!”
Oh, can the voice in my head be reasoned with? Is the volume controllable? Thank fuck.
Tony was looking at me, I think he asked me a question so I just noncommittally nodded my head. He started walking off so I followed behind. Let him deal with the mess, he’s good at that at least. I have my own problems.
‘So, am I going insane Mr. Voice in my head?’
“No! You are not insane! And I am not Mr. Voice, I am known as the God of Light!”
Oh good, split personality and a god complex. I’m a real crazy person.
“No, I'm serious! I’m a god! You just got here so you might not know but you hearing my voice isn’t insane, it is amazing!”
Amazing my foot, annoying more like. What is so amazing about having you chattering in my skull?
“Well since you are so compatible with holy powers you can borrow my strength! I can even protect you by using my powers through you as a medium!”
…
I need an explanation about our situation here before I decide if I’m crazy or not. I started to tune out the voice of the supposed god. Turns out if I focus I can do that. He’s still there whining about me blocking him out but his voice is tiny and pushed to the back of my head. I can finally register what is going on.
The door that was in front of me this whole time, but that I hadn’t noticed due to the chatter in my head, started to open.
It became apparent to me after they opened that one of the 3 situations I thought I might be in was not correct. I mentally checked “prank” off my list. All that was left was that I had gone crazy or that I was in a situation I couldn’t comprehend.
The scene beyond the door was too real for a prank. The outfits they wore were amazingly detailed and the armor and weapons they held shined in the light. Those were real, I could tell, and not some cosplay level crap either.
As I was sorting out my thoughts Bobby Grant, the oaf, did something to antagonize the largest of the new group of people and ended up on his ass.
The way the large man moved was inhuman when he grabben Bobby. It was scary. I heard the small voice push through for a second.
“Do you want me to get rid of that big guy? He’s scaring you right so it would be fine to make him go ‘poof’ right?”
I felt a cold shiver up my spine. I realized at some point I had grabbed Tony’s sleeve to stay close to him and he had looked at me while the god, no the stupid voice was still annoying me with a concerned expression. I hope he didn’t know I was going insane yet.
The supposed prince and the clean cut man began to ask Tony some questions. There was some crap about a tutorial, killing some incompetent mages, and some questions about games of all things. But one thing this “Black” had said I needed answered most pressingly.
“Our… purpose?”
The voice in my head came back in force.
“You can’t give her a purpose! She is my future Holy Maiden! I’ll purify you all!”
Meanwhile Black said; “You are all here to help us against the onslaught of the demons."
“Oh. that's fine then I hate the demons too, lets purify them first.”
It was around this time I considered that both of my suspicions were correct. I am both in a situation I can’t comprehend AND I’m going insane.
Advertisement
- In Serial219 Chapters
Deathworld Commando: Reborn
What happens when humanity's greatest weapon gets a second chance at life? Commander Kronos wasn't even considered to be a human but rather a weapon to be used for the greater good of his species. He was grown in a tube to be the perfect weapon so he lacked many emotions/experiences most people take for granted. Upon experiencing some emotions for the first time he was quickly eliminated by humanity and was reborn into a world of swords and sorcery, getting a second lease on life.Of course, he didn't see it that way at the start and thought he was being fooled. It took a near-death experience and a lot of growing up but he finally decided to keep his promise to his former comrades and give his new life an honest try.Embark on the story of the former Commander of Hades Squad as he settles into his new life as the Dark Elf Kaladin Shadowheart. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Hello and welcome to my story, this is my first attempt at a fiction so feel free to leave suggestions/comments if you see anything. Thanks for clicking on my story and I hope you give it a try. I post every Monday and Thursday mornings PST. Join the Discord- https://discord.com/invite/YGSUeuTTwH You can also find me on Reddit at the HFY subreddit. Artwork done by blacklaplz on Fiverr.
8 1111 - In Serial59 Chapters
Frays in the Weave
Great tales need to be told, but those that shape the world must be added to the Weave. With the awakening of a god two taleweavers sharing two worlds meet and shape a new future for both. As they add new strands to the Weave in a way no taleweaver has ever done before ripples run through reality and the Weave begins to unravel. Soon there are frays in the Weave. Frays in the Weave is book two in the Taleweaver saga. Book one is The Taleweaver. PG13
8 134 - In Serial10 Chapters
Decimation [ Apocalyptic Novel ]
Long ago, The world began to change. the presidencies combined and formed one government. forcing people off the planet before total extinction. which was the Worlds last chance for survival. Plan Z as they called it. All of the popuation got together running tests physical verbal and mental tests to see who would be able to withstand space. only 200 people for each space station. then that was it. The world launched into outer space. many rockets failed but at the same time many rockets were successful leading us to where we are now. we are living in space. on a newly found planet called "xephria" is where our civilization stands. the world was destroyed by an unknown Plague. its been one hundred years and the civilization is now sending teenagers every 50 teenagers is two adults each in a squadrant. there are 5 squadrants being sent down to see if earth will be habitable again. they wil confront many obsticles along the way but what exactly will they find?
8 191 - In Serial32 Chapters
The Demon King Has Been Defeated! Now What?
The Demon King has been defeated - now what?The struggle is not over yet for you, Princess.The world seems dead-set on getting in your way.The intrigues and power struggles you've gotten entangled in will follow you regardless of your wishes.The crossing fates will make you choose between an insatiable lover and an overpowered Hero who is hot on his trail, hell-bent on getting you back, righting what's wrong, and bringing forth a new age."Don't you get it, Hero? You're bothering us, so please just leave!" Can true desire stand against destiny?
8 180 - In Serial20 Chapters
Legend of Xeor
Part of The Chronicles of Allastar. Early after the creation of the world Beasts were the Rulers of the world with physical might and low intellect acting mostly on instinct and desire. Xeor is a "Young" lionman who travels around the world of Allastar following his destiny. Might contain grammar mistakes and bad jokes.
8 82 - In Serial56 Chapters
float with me | IT
Lara Lewis moves to Derry at the wrong time. Not only does she catch the attention of the infamous Patrick Hockstetter, children are disappearing and a dark entity that takes the form of your deepest fear is terrorising the town. Can Lara and the Losers Club take down Pennywise before it's too late, Or will they float too?
8 87

