Padraic Whitehelm’s POV

“Yo, what took you so long? It’s not like you to be so late,” a tall Dark Elf called out with a wave and a yawn.

He wore a casual shirt and pants, and his long black hair was tied behind him. He had a kind but tired smile that seemed to be illuminated by his warm pink eyes. And just like Kaladin’s father, he was damn big for an Elf. So I guess Dark Elves really just are gifted compared to their brethren. However, I saw plenty of them in The Barrens but seeing was always believing.

“Sorry, I brought an old friend along. He’s not too used to running,” Kaladin responded with a slight wave.

The other guy was a Human, and his inquisitive brown eyes locked onto me. “So that white bearded Dwarf was your friend? I thought I heard you call him brother, no?”

This guy… seems a little… awkward.

My eyes immediately discovered that his nails were down to stubs, most likely from biting them. His fingertips were incredibly dry for some reason. I suppose if I had to reason why he looked like the type that meddled with chemicals. Even though his red and gray shirt is clean, I still smelt the lingering smell of…something weird.

He also doesn’t look like the type that gets out much, considering his sweat has already dried. And since both of us managed to work up a sweat, his athletic abilities are around mine, and that’s not a very high bar. But the Dark Elf seemed to be an average guy, maybe a little tired from waking up early.

“We are. Just different mothers and fathers,” I added.

The Human looked confused at my comment, but he strode up to me and extended an awkward, stiff hand. “It’s nice to meet you. I’m Sylas Paine.”

I snorted and licked my lips to stop myself from grinning too much, but I accepted his handshake nonetheless. “Ah, so you’re the guy giving my brother drugs? Should I sic his family on you now or later?”

Sylas blinked once, seemingly unphased, as he slowly broke the handshake. “It was Kaladin’s idea.”

Ah…so dry…I see why he and Kaladin get along…

The Dark Elf chuckled to himself and patted Sylas on the back. “I think that was supposed to be a joke.”

Sylas looked at me, then back to his friend. “Aren’t jokes supposed to be funny? What’s funny about having an infamous High Elf assassin and a dead Dark Elf general coming for my life because I’m helping their son make drugs that may or may not be slowly killing him?” he said, sounding grave.

“Slowly killing him?” I coughed.

“It’s not that serious…” Kaladin groaned. “Sylvia can undo any severe side effects as long as I don’t overdo it.

The Dark Elf shook his head as if he were disappointed, but then he turned his attention to me and smiled brightly. “Nice to meet you. Name’s Varnir.”

“Padraic,” I said while shaking his hand.

Varnir’s eyes drifted towards Kal. “Something the matter, Kaladin? You looked drained. Has Sylvia been keeping you up recently? You don’t typically space out this much.”

Kal cleared his throat and nodded weakly. “I’m fine. As you can tell, I’ve been through a lot these last few days,” he said, ignoring Varnir’s sly comment.

Sylas grunted to himself. “Indeed, I’m surprised you even came this morning. Varnir and I were half expecting you not to show up.”

“A promise is a promise,” Kal said unenthusiastically.

Varnir snickered and winked at Kal. “I never thought I’d see you, of all people, falling to your knees and bawling like an infant. Then proceed to get kissed by some beautiful Beastmen in just a few minutes.” Varnir chuckled to himself and shook his head. “Lauren and Sylvia must be beside themselves.”

Hey…I like this guy.

Anyone who had the guts to poke the monster that is Kaladin Shadowheart ranked high in my book. And he did it without being too insensitive and keeping it light-hearted.

Kaladin groaned again in embarrassment. His ears turned a light shade of pink as a thin smile spread across his face. It made me sweat because I had seen that smile before. His father wore the same damn smile when he was about to work us to death.

“Why are you smiling like that? Wait, Kaladin, I was just joking,” Varnir pleaded.

“Uh, huh. I’m thrilled you showed up today, Varnir,” Kal said, his voice cold and devoid of emotion.

—

I tried catching my breath while looking up through the purple canopy. These trees…this entire man-made forest. It was weird yet oddly relaxing listening to leaves rattle with the breeze.

I felt like there was a purpose for this place, that whoever designed it knew precisely what they were doing with every little hill and creek. Or perhaps that’s just my Dwarven instincts going into overdrive to protect me in my final moments…because I’m damn tired…my heart might explode.

Is this how I die? Reduced to a sack of broken, sweaty flesh…

“Wha—what—why is this so damn hard? Is this really how you do things? All this running and lifting heavy crap?” Varnir choked out between breaths.

“Yes, it is. You wanted to know how I got stronger. This is how. I truly believe people have become too reliant on mana. There is a time and place for mana enhancement, training like this is the time for without,” Kaladin answered. “Besides, for somebody like you who laments their lack of mana, doing this kind of workout is exceptionally beneficial, Varnir.”

“I’m not lamenting anything…” Varnir huffed. “They were just born lucky, and I can do everything they can without magic!”

Sylas and I were having a bonding moment while we lay face-first in the dirt. It seems both of us struggled with mana enhancement compared to these two. Actually, even I seemed to be in better shape than Sylas. Perhaps my idea of him being a bookworm was accurate.

Sylas rolled over on his back and sucked in a large breath. “This—are you sure? Doesn’t using mana enhancement make you stronger? What’s—what’s the point? I’ve never seen one of the royal guards or even a War God not use mana enhancement before. I think you are just torturing us,” he groaned while exhaling slowly.

“War Gods are the exception. The point is to get stronger without it. Mana enhancement works by enhancing your body’s current ability. If you can lift a boulder with mana enhancement but not without, then that’s your max. But…if you trained your body to lift the boulder without mana, then eventually you could lift far more than just the boulder with mana enhancement,” Kal explained.

“I see…I guess that makes sense…” Sylas said weakly.

Suddenly, Varnir started screaming in pain as he grabbed his leg. His legs shot out, and he started shaking. “MY LEG! GAH! IT HURTS! OH, CRAP! AH!!” he yelled while flopping around.

Kaladin looked at him blankly. “You are cramping. Drink more water,” Kal said. A waterskin appeared in his hand.

He tossed it at Varnir, but it smacked him in the face with a wet thump. “You did this on purpose! Listen, I’m sorry for teasing you! You cried like a beautiful baby boy!” Varnir managed to tease through gritted teeth while rubbing his leg.

“No…I didn’t. I can’t make your legs cramp on command, Varnir. It just goes to show how out of shape you really are. And that you aren’t drinking enough water. Also, a beautiful baby boy? Are you trying to antagonize me? We can run some more if you’d like?” Kal asked with a sigh.

Varnir finished rubbing his leg, and the cramp subsided. “No! I’m sorry…I was just teasing you a little bit.” Varnir jumped up on shaky legs. His eyes narrowed at Kal. “But I am somewhat serious. I can tell you are out of it today—more than I had expected. Shouldn’t you be thrilled to have your family back?”

Kaladin averted his eyes. “I thought so too,” he said despondently.

Sylas looked at me for a long time but didn’t say a word. I felt like he was sizing me up, but his eyes drifted away. “I have to ask you, Kaladin, was that kiss such a surprise? The entire time I watched you interact with your family, you didn’t seem bothered by anything, even finding out you had a new little brother. Yet when she kissed you…it was almost like you stopped breathing for a while. Why?”

“Uh, I think that’s pretty obvious, Sylas. I think any guy would freeze up in that situation. Well, any guy that’s not some punk, at least,” Varnir spat, slightly annoyed. “But… he isn’t completely wrong, Kaladin. Let me guess. You’ve been putting off what we talked about?”

“I’ve been preoccupied,” Kaladin shot back.

What they talked about? This is news to me…

Varnir snorted while furrowing his brows. “Kaladin, don’t screw with me. You’ve been awake for a long time now and have had plenty of time. You even promised me.”

Apparently, that was enough to have sunk the dagger into Kal’s heart.

“I know…I’m just…confused….and afraid? Afraid…I—I don’t know…” Kaladin said weakly, turning away.

Varnir sighed deeply. “I figured after all this time, you would just come to terms with things, and you and Sylvia would be together…”

“I was half expecting Lauren to come in and snatch you away,” Sylas mused to himself. “But I suppose I’ve convinced myself that you could pursue my dear sister. I think I could allow you, of all people, to be her husband. But you aren’t allowed to take another wife. It’s unthinkable that Lin would be anything other than number one in your heart.”

This guy…is a damn freak…I think this Lin is number one in his heart. This is the third time he’s mentioned his sister in the last hour. She isn’t even here…

“Why are you two friends with this guy?” I asked out loud.

Both Varnir and Kaladin watched Sylas in utter annoyance. “I have to ask myself that question more than I care to admit,” Varnir groaned as he smiled fondly.

“There are no romantic feelings between Lin and myself. That much I know for certain,” Kaladin told him with finality.

But it seemed that Sylas didn’t get the whole Kaladin being serious part.

“Are you sure? What’s not to like about my sister? She’s beautiful, highly intelligent, resourceful, thoughtful, not to mention strong, or even the future head of our house. I mean—”

“Sylas…my friend, you really aren’t helping here,” Varnir interrupted with a groan a he shook his head.

“If it’s a problem about choosing, then why not just choose both? I guess I could acquiesce to my previous statement. Besides, I’m sure Lin won’t—ouch…hey…” Sylas whined.

I flicked another pebble at the side of his head. “You seem like a smart guy Sylas. Just learn to shut up every once in a while…or stop talking about your sister all the time,” I told him.

“That’s not very nice…” Sylas complained.

Varnir chuckled again. “Yeah, but he’s right. You know you're a pretty funny guy, Padraic.”

Heh. I know I am—most of the time…at least.

Even I couldn’t help but chuckle a little, and even though Sylas was being dead serious about his stupid sister, it appeared the guy could at least take a joke. Unfortunately, the only person who didn’t seem to be having a very good time was Kaladin.

He had been silent for some time, his eyes cast out into the forest, brooding as he used to when we were kids. It was like he was here…but not really here. And, of course, we all naturally picked up on that.

Kal must have sensed our staring as he awkwardly rubbed the back of his head, just like his damn father does. “Sorry…I’m… going to go for a bit of a run. How about we call it for today?”

“Running away from the issue, mhm?” Varnir chastised.

Kal shook his head now. “No, not quite. I’m just… going to sit somewhere for a while. I’ll be thinking about it. I mean, at this point, I have to? So…I promise,” Kal told us somewhat dejectedly.

And with that, we all watched Kaladin’s back recede into the forest. “Hey, was he always like this?” Varnir asked me.

“I’ve realized my old friend has changed in many places. And in others, he hasn’t changed a bit.”

—

Bowen Taurus’s POV

I took a deep breath and let the fresh morning air fill my lungs. Walking through this forest every once in a while was truly relaxing, at least to me. Kaladin had told me that this forest felt unnatural to him, yet I’d never had that feeling. Although I’ve been doing my best to rectify that issue for not only him but all the Elves in this school, I have to wonder if I’m doing a good job or not. It’s not like I can tell.

I have to ponder if I’m doing anything right anymore…

When I built this school, I insisted on making everything efficient. The paths to the buildings, the material used in the construction of just about everything, the placement of plants and trees to give the most amount of shadow from the sun, and even the lights on the path illuminate the way during the night. I did it all in the name of efficiency, and I did it for the future of my students.

The internals of the buildings were meant to be easy to navigate for staff and students. Classrooms were easy to maneuver in, were cleaned, and kept fresh for daily use. We offered a plethora of classes to suit everyone's needs. Everything had a place. Everything had a purpose. And everything was for them.

However, not everyone wanted me to be so… efficient.

My wonderful and beautiful wife insisted that I create a section of this school just for myself. I told her I planned on having my office be, well…my office. But that wasn’t enough to convince her. She hounded me until I carved out a small plot for me and me alone.

Although having an area that was truly mine in a public space like this was nearly impossible, outside of my most private quarters, it would be obvious that anywhere or anything I had built solely for me would see some kind of use by somebody else. And, of course, that logic did not sway her opinion in the slightest.

So I opted to create this place.

On top of a small hill at the back of the school’s barrier, overlooking the man-made forest, was a small secluded area I had built. It wasn’t all that much, just a simple bench, a single tree for year-round shade, and a nice view of the campus and the palace.

And there may be a Dwarven rune underneath the soil that dampens the noise or provides an invisible barrier…maybe.

I knew that some people were aware of this place's existence, but very few people had access to this area outside of school events or to individuals I’ve given express permission to. Of course, the groundskeepers knew about it, but it was their job, so there was no helping it. And typically, this place was vacant if I came at a time when the groundskeepers were off.

But not today.

Once I crested the hill and passed through the barrier, I was greeted by the sight of a lone man sitting on the bench. His long, raven black hair fell to his broad shoulders, and his tan High Elf ears peaked out from the top of his head. His shirt was soaked through with sweat, and he seemed relaxed yet tense. How that was possible, I wasn’t sure. A weird aura surrounded him.

Of course, he knew about this place. It made sense.

“Good morning, Vo—Kaladin…” I said, catching myself.

Here I was, priding myself on how I treat my students, but I couldn't even remember one’s name. I blame the early hour and lack of focus.

He turned his head slightly, and his golden eye peered at me. He faced forward again. “Good morning, Bowen.”

I walked up to him, and I got the impression that the young man was a bit…emotional right now. But there was something odd. I had been expecting him to be overjoyed and practically brimming with excitement now that he had finally reunited with his family after so many years. But, still, I didn’t feel he was all too happy.

I motioned towards the bench. “May I join you?” I asked politely.

“This place is your doing, isn’t it?” Kaladin asked me after he scooted over to make room.

“It is. My wife insisted that I have a place to myself,” I explained.

“Oh…I’m sorry. I didn’t know I was intruding.” His tone was cold and emotionless. It was almost frightening in a way.

I waved Kaladin’s concerns away. “Don’t be sorry. This place isn’t off-limits to you. I did permit you to use this forest as you pleased, did I not? And this is a part of the forest, mhm?”

“I suppose,” he said despondently.

Is he…brooding? It sort of feels like he is…I mean, he is around that age. But there has to be a bit more…huh…

I sighed and looked out onto the forest and the campus. From here, you could see just about everything—the library with its stained glass windows and high arches. Even the black and gray marble seemed to shine in the morning sun from the central building. You could even make out small blurbs of people moving about through the trees that protected the paths.

I looked out a bit further to the north. Dark gray clouds hung in the air far off in the distance. “It appears a storm is coming. This one looks particularly nasty.”

“Indeed.”

“This should be the last rainfall of the year. After this, snow should start falling before the end of the month,” I said, filling the silence with conversation.

“Most likely.”

“You know, with all the wards in this city, it’s amazing that such a large storm will barely allow any water in. After the storm breaks through the city’s barrier, the districts, and then the schools…I’d say it’s only about 10% of the original storm’s power that reaches us here,” I informed him.

“Is that so?”

Sigh…it appears Kaladin truly is having a bad day. Or…is he?

I turned to look Kaladin in the face, and what I saw there was interesting. I can’t say that I’m particularly gifted in understanding other people’s feelings considering my…well…my life. However, I’ve most definitely improved since I was a young man. Perhaps age really has brought me wisdom.

I couldn’t believe I had managed to piece things together. I felt as if I understood Kaladin’s current concerns. After all, the look on his face was a look I was familiar with. It was a face I once wore as a young man. Kaladin and I were two very different people, as far as I can tell, but even with so many differences, it appeared we had one thing in common.

I couldn't help but chuckle a bit at the sight. It was a relief to see that even a man who could live a life of a runaway slave and slay a Dragon could worry about simple things such as love. That he could be an average teenager if given enough freedom and time.

Kaladin didn’t enjoy my chuckling as he raised an annoyed eyebrow at me. However, he didn’t vocalize his annoyance either. Instead, he continued to look out at the space in front of him and let out a deep sigh.

“Bowen…can I ask you a question?” he asked timidly.

How unlike him. I wonder just how many people have seen this side of the Dragonslayer? I must be a lucky man. Or unlucky…depending on the question.

“Of course. You can ask me anything, Kaladin,” I reassured him.

He fidgeted in his seat and nervously ran his fingers over his hand. “How…how do you know if you love someone? Like…love them enough to marry them or start a family with them?”

“Ah…what a question that is. Well, I may not be an expert, and I can hardly be the one to give you a definitive answer, but I’ll tell you about an old proverb, ‘Marriage isn't so hard. You find someone to spend the rest of your life with, and then you do it.’”

Kaladin gave me a slightly annoyed look, and I just chuckled. “Well, that saying was coined by a Human, so I imagine things are a bit different for Elves. After all, spending the rest of your life with someone when that ‘rest of your life’ part is a few hundred years is a very different reality. As a Human, I could never understand what it would be like to live that long, let alone spend all that time with a singular person, unless I loved them, of course. As for me, someone who is happy with their life, I wish I could live hundreds of years with my children and wife. Perhaps that makes me one of the odd ones.”

“So…that…doesn’t really answer my question,” Kaladin mumbled. “But are you saying that I should only live a life with another Elf?”

I shook my head at his question. “From a Human perspective, it would make the most sense, yes. After all, it’s a tragedy when a parent outlives their children. Unfortunately, that’s the case for our race. But for you? It would be the norm.”

“The norm…” Kaladin mumbled to himself.

“That’s right. Take a look around you, Kaladin. Nearly every Human you know at this school will cease to exist in a hundred years. You will outlive me, the princesses, and even my daughter and eventually her future children. But more importantly, you are going to outlive the Beastmen by an even larger margin. That includes Mila…and her children and her children’s children. I could never imagine what it’s like to live that way. I feel like it would eventually eat away at my soul.”

“So I really shouldn’t even entertain the idea…I don’t want to think about that kind of stuff. I know that everyone dies eventually, but…I… I just don’t know. Watching Mila and Cerila grow old while I don’t…that’s…hard,” Kaladin muttered.

“I wouldn’t say that,” I said as I wagged a finger at him. “Despite everything I said, the common sense of Humans doesn’t seem to matter to Elves all that much. It’s not an uncommon sight to see Elves with Humans or Beastmen, even Dwarves, on infrequent occasions. As a matter of fact, I’d say there are more races mixed with Elves than any other race. So if watching those around you grow old and die, and in most cases, your own children, why do Elves keep doing it? To be completely honest with you, I don’t have a definite answer to that,” I said with a shrug.

“However, every Elf I’ve ever asked has given me a different reason. But nearly all of them had one thing in common.”

“And what was that?” Kaladin asked me.

“Love. Nearly everyone said it was because they loved their partner and their family. So does that mean love doesn’t care how long somebody will last? That as long as you love them for whatever time they have in this world, that’s all that matters? Who knows?” I said with a shrug.

I turned my attention back to Kaladin. He looked at me with an expression of confusion mixed with uncertainty filling his tired mismatched eyes. I swear I watched him age a few years right before my eyes.

Perhaps…I had said a bit too much…

I cleared my throat. “Anyways, I think I may have confused you more than I helped you, so perhaps I should tell you my story. You see, you and I have, or well, had a lot in common. When I was a young man, I didn’t understand the first thing about love. I was too busy practicing magic and leading my mage squads against Tel’an’duth to even notice that a certain beautiful War God had her eye on me. I really was just that oblivious.”

“You mean your wife? You didn’t know that she loved you?” Kaladin asked.

“No…well…yes, to be honest, I had no idea. But, it was more like I hadn’t realized that I loved her despite my feelings being apparent to everyone. I had a friend back in the war. He was my second in command and a great man. We all called him Brick.”

Kal turned to me with a raised eyebrow. “Brick? Was that because…well, he wasn’t the brightest?”

I snorted a little as I remembered my old friend. “Partially. He was built like a brick, thought like a brick, and fought like a brick. So we just called him Brick.” I waved my hand and could tell Kaladin was watching me with rapt attention.

“Anyways, that’s not the point. Brick was a simple man, and one day at a late-night campfire, seemingly fed up with my indecisiveness, he asked me a simple question. He asked me if I would be okay if my wife ended up with another man.”

He scooted a little further from the back of his seat and turned his body toward me. “And? How did you respond?”

“I responded rather quickly, nearly instantly, and to put it simply, I said it would bother me,” I recounted.

Well…there was a bit more to that conversation, but that’s all that needs to be said. Come to think of it. I think Kaladin’s father might have been at that camp.

“And it was that easy? From there, you understood everything?” Kaladin asked me in disbelief.

I chuckled at his eagerness. “Only if it were that easy. No, despite my immediate response, I still couldn’t convince myself that I cared for her that much. I wasn’t sure what my stupid war-addled teenage brain was doing to me, but I just couldn’t grasp the concept of love even then—despite all the signs practically smashing me in the face. It was like I was immune to my own blindness and feelings.”

I shook my head again and looked at the encroaching storm. It felt like it would come sooner rather than later at this point. Maybe an hour or two.

“However, my dear friend didn’t get mad at me or even try to explain things. Perhaps his simple-minded nature allowed him to understand such complex emotions. Or maybe I’m just a simpleton for not being able to understand myself. Either way, I’ll never forget what he asked me next. He asked me, since I didn’t want her to be with another man, why didn’t I just make her happy?”

“A rather simple question…” Kaladin muttered. “I don’t think wanting to make someone happy necessarily means that you have romantic feelings for them. I mean, I want to make nearly my entire family happy…”

Wow…that’s…a scary response. He almost repeated what I said word for word.

“I agree. The old me said practically the same exact thing. But it was what he said next that really made me realize what I was missing.”

It felt as if Kaladin was trying to stare a hole through me. His serious and overbearing gaze made me sweat a bit despite the cool temperature and breeze. I know he didn’t mean to make me uncomfortable. It was merely his intense presence.

I had to remind myself that this young man was far from ordinary when he wanted to be. I wondered if we fought right at this moment if I could beat him. Perhaps in my prime, I would have stood a better chance…but now?

I’m starting to think like Bishop…does getting old make you wish for more violence now that I can’t perform it as well? Or do I just want to test my mettle against a younger opponent? Anyway…

“He told me that I was being selfish. If I didn’t want to make her happy, I had no right to complain if she spent her time or life with another man. And if I didn’t want to make her happy, then I didn’t love her,” I said. “And for some reason, those strings of questions helped me connect my thoughts. I realized, at that moment, that I loved my wife, and I’d never be okay with another man making her happy.”

“I…”

Kaladin stopped himself and bit his lip. He seemed to have come to a conclusion, but that was wiped away in just a moment. And for some reason, it looked as if Kaladin was afraid, very afraid…that was not the look I expected.

Kaladin abruptly shot up from his seat. “Thank you for speaking to me, Bowen. I’ll have to think about this some more.”

Kaladin was about to walk away, but he turned on his heels. He stretched his hand out, and a broken and destroyed silver mask rested in his palm from thin air. “Here, take it. I promised you that I'd let you have it when I didn’t need it anymore.”

I took the generous offer and felt my heart race with excitement. It wasn’t every day that I got such a rare magical item to tinker with.

I swallowed the drool in my mouth and nodded profusely. “Thank you, Kaladin. I’ll do my best to return this to you one day.”

“Oh! And one more thing. I got a correspondence back from the Dwarves. They believe they found something interesting with that green dungeon crystal but have yet to report it. They said it required further testing and would have it back to me before the end of winter, along with all the books they can scavenge on gravity magic,” I informed him.

Kaladin nodded his head. “I understand. Thank you, Bowen.”

I just smiled at him, and Kaladin took his leave. I watched him leave until he disappeared through the barrier completely. I wasn’t sure if I had helped the young man or made things even more confusing.

I was surprised when his childhood friend kissed him like that. She was standing in the hallway in complete silence, with her eyes closed for the longest time. It wasn’t until Kaladin’s little brother came and fetched her did she move. I wondered what was going on in her head as well.

Everything up until that moment seemed to be perfectly normal for him. But that kiss….it had shaken him to his core for some reason. Did Kaladin perhaps love that girl many years ago before his separation? I couldn’t imagine that a seven-year-old boy, especially a seven-year-old Kaladin, knew what he was feeling back then.

But then again…she was wearing an engagement collar…and she kissed Kaladin…huh…

Does this mean his new feelings for Sylvia clouds his judgment? Or perhaps I’m just looking too deep into things?

“Talk about complicated,” I muttered to myself.

Either way, I’m satisfied knowing that he at least listened to my council. Whether it helped him or not, I can’t be sure. But I liked to imagine it helped him at least a little.

But more importantly, it’s a relief that no matter how strong that young man can be…he still is just a boy at heart.

Now, I suppose I should get ready for that meeting.