I knew better than to look at his face. I knew better than to make a sound even as he was breaking my heart. I was an Omega, a servant and not allowed to look upon the face of my superiors. I was an Omega and I would always be an Omega. A mantra burned into my brain by the pack I served. I was grateful for Alpha Lawrence for taking me in when I had been orphaned. I did not resent my station in life. I had been born of two rogues and it had been well within Alpha Lawrence's right to leave me for dead when my dying father had left me on his territory but he had taken me in instead. I owed him my life and I was truly grateful for his insistence of bringing me into the pack.

"Are you listening to what I am saying, Omega?" The words were said low and I nodded once. I was glad I wasn't allowed to look at his face. I did not wish to see his irritation in his eyes. It was funny. I did not know what he looked like or what colour his eyes were or even his hair. It was funny because he was my mate and I would never have any clue as to what he looked like. We were destined but not for that, no. I was an Omega and would always be below everyone in the pack.

"Yes, sir. No one is to know and I am to never approach you." I bowed my head and a strong hand ruffled my hair gently. I hated the gesture, it spoke of familiarity and I wanted to back away. I didn't like people touching me with familiarity. Only Alpha Lawrence touched me with affection and that was when we alone, where no one could see. Everyone else ignored me or gave me the occasional slap for something I did wrong.

"Good girl." He sounded so happy and it made my heart clench in my chest but I pushed the pain away. I had a duty to do and I would not be able to do it in my avoidance to him. Alpha Lawrence would have to be informed before he noticed my lack of cleaning the Beta son's room.

"Sir, may I ask what I am to tell Alpha Lawrence?" I kept my head down and shifted my clasped hands slightly. My palms were rough with callouses and the light grey dress I wore was getting ragged but it was clean. I always made sure I looked respectable. It was something I could control and I would control it.

"We just went over this, Omega. You cannot tell anyone." There was an edge to his voice that I shrunk under.

"Sir, it is just that your room is in section two, which is in my section to clean and cater to. I do not wish to shirk in my duties in my avoidance of you. If I have something to tell Alpha Lawrence, then perhaps I can get the section switched with another Omega." I said the words slowly, not wishing to be hit for my audacity to talk back but I would not give Alpha Lawrence a reason to send me away. I wished to stay with him. He was the closest thing I had to family. Faint memories swirled in my head and I shoved them away with a sharp lurch in my chest.

An Omega does not have memories.

"Smart girl, I didn't think of that. Tell him one of the others made you feel uncomfortable and you request to be changed to a different section. We all know he has a soft spot for you." He sounded relieved, as if he thought I would wish to tell Alpha Lawrence of my rejection. I would not because he order me but my duty to the pack outweighed everything else.

"Alpha Lawrence is a great Alpha. He cares for all of his pack members equally." It was an automatic response when someone remarked on his slight affection for me. I had been told it wasn't proper for anyone to know of his affection for me. I was a child of rogues and an Omega. I was lower than low and Alphas were not supposed to care for people like me.

"Okay. Now I can't quite remember... what do I call you?" He waved his hands slightly before he cracked his knuckles. It almost looked like a nervous gesture and I bowed my head lower.

"I do not know what it was my parents named me, sir." That much was the truth. I had no memories of a name that I had been called by them. I couldn't remember them to even try to think of any such name. My memories were a painful fuzz and I shoved them away once more.

"You don't know? You have to have a name... Everyone does." He sounded slightly surprised and I fought down a smile. Alpha Lawrence had named me, it was more of a nickname than anything but it was mine.

"Alpha Lawrence calls me Mary Mary." Despite the pain that was radiating from my chest I wanted to smile. Alpha Lawrence, who tucked me in when I was little, singing me the nursery rhyme as he pulled the blankets up to my chin, making sure I was covered and would not be cold. The memories were hazy and almost didn't fit together properly but I shook it off quickly.

An Omega does not have memories.

"What?" He sounded startled and I bowed my head once more, the gesture automatic as breathing.

"That is what he calls me, sir. It is the only name I know of." I didn't wish to explain to him the nursery rhyme, the silly little thing that Alpha Lawrence did for me when I was but a scared little girl. It was my memory and he did not need to know of it. No one did. I shuddered under that.

"Mary Mary... That can't be it... it doesn't really matter now, I guess." He sounded confused before he inhaled deeply, straightening his back. "I, Lucas Simmons, reject you, Mary Mary, the Omega, as my mate." As soon as the words exited his mouth a fire spread through my chest, eating away at everything in its path but I stood firm, keeping my face blank. "Did it work?" If it was possible the painful fire seemed to burn hotter in my chest at his words.

"Yes, sir." I gritted the words out and focused on breathing. I wanted to curl up in a little ball and let the fire consume me till I was nothing but ashes but I knew it didn't work like that. I would burn forever and it would never let up. I had to be strong but my knees shook slightly and my legs trembled. I wanted to hit the floor, my body begged it over me but I needed to be strong, I couldn't allow myself to be punished for it.

"How do I know you aren't lying?" He said it so disbelieving that I took in a sharp gasp as the fire raged down to my stomach, trying to consume all of me. I felt my legs wish to crumple underneath me and burning tears gathered in my eyes

"I am in a fair amount of pain, sir. Please forgive me for my lack of propriety." With that I let my legs buckle and I grasped at my chest, heaving in huge gulps of air trying to quell the violent fire that was raging through me. I let out shuddering breaths and crumpled the fabric of my dress in my hand. The hot tears made burning trails down my cheeks and I tried to fight through it but everything hurt.

"You are a special girl, Mary Mary, but thank you for being so understanding. I am sure you will find another, more appropriate mate." He ruffled my hair and was gone, leaving me struggling against the pain. As abruptly as it started it stopped, leaving me feeling oddly empty. I let out several shuddering breaths and forced my cramping hand to release my dress. I took in several more shaking breaths before I forced myself to stand on shaking legs. I used my trembling hands to brush down the crumpled fabric of the dress before I forced my body to move.

Each footstep was agonizing, I felt like I had just ran a full marathon but I needed to talk to Alpha Lawrence. I ignored the cramping and tired muscles and slowly made my way to his office. I felt like the stairs were a mountain but I forced myself through it and finally stood at the solid wood door. I bit the inside of my cheek and lifted a shaking hand and knocked softly on the wood. I wanted to lean against it and slide to the floor. I was exhausted, a bone deep tiredness had filled me. I stepped back slightly as the door opened.

"What is it, Omega?" It was Beta John's voice and I gave him a slow curtsy. I wobbled slightly, feeling unsteady on my feet.

"I just needed to speak to Alpha Lawrence, sir, about my work section." My voice warbled slightly and I wanted to curse. I didn't mean to sound that weak, that pathetic but my body was betraying me.

"Beta John, who is it?" The comforting timbre of his voice made me want to crawl onto his lap and bury my face into his chest and sob out the hurt. It was something I hadn't done in many years but the urge was still there. I knew that his arms would hold just as much comfort now as they did the last time he held me. I couldn't remember what time that was. Everything hurt and was so disjointed and confusing so I shoved it all away.

"It's an Omega wanting to talk to you about her work section." Beta John sounded irritated and bored as he looked over his shoulder. I focused on his slightly scuffed boots. They were steel toed. I knew that because I had cleaned them many times before. I had replaced their broken laces and kept them clean for him. He did not notice, they never did but that was my job. To make sure nothing was noticed.

"Well bring her in, I have a few minutes." He sounded gruff but I knew he needed to be. I hated to come to him with something this trivial but Lucas had demanded me to stay away and I could not remain in my section if I were to do as he said. To be fair, I really didn't want to be around him at the moment either. I did not know if the now fragile control I had over my emotions would last another run in.

"Come in then, girl. Don't keep the Alpha waiting." He opened the door wider and I walked in, trying to keep my shaky legs from giving out. I turned to face the desk and gave another unsteady curtsy. I swayed too far and without thinking I reached out and grasped his desk to prevent my body from hitting the floor. I felt the sudden tension in the air at the action and I brought my other hand to my forehead. I slowly got my footing back and stared at the hard wood floor.

"I am sorry, sir." I said it meekly and wanted to curse at how faint I sounded. "I am sorry to intrude but there was an incident in my section." My voice warbled and sounded on the edge of tears. I hated how I couldn't hide how emotional I was. I hated how I couldn't trust my own body.

"Get out." His voice was low and I could feel his angry gaze on me. I hunched under it and clasped my hands in front of me before turning. Defeat filled me. If he would not listen then I would be stuck tending to Lucas's room. "Not you. Beta John, get out." His voice was rough and I stopped mid-turn and kept my gaze glued to the floor, tears burned my eyes but I refused to let them fall.

"But-"

"Don't argue with me. Obviously this incident has shaken her and having her repeat it to two authority figures will be too intimidating. Leave." There was a distinct order in his voice and I winced as the door slammed as Beta John left. A thick silence fell and I could hear Alpha Lawrence's heavy breathing. He was angry. "What happened?" There was a harsh expectancy to his voice and I trembled slightly.

"It was just boys being boys but I feel very uncomfortable tending that section now." The lies hurt coming out but I had to say it. I had to get away from the section. I had to escape from the pain I knew it would cause. I couldn't stay there and do my job and I didn't want to be banished. I wanted to stay with him, where I felt a feeling of comfort and safety.

"What did they do? Did they hurt you?" He was angry, I knew it wasn't at me but I hated hearing him angry, especially when I partially caused it. He was a good Alpha and I hated it when he was angry with the pack because of me. I wanted to tell him no but the memory of the painful fire that had raced through me wouldn't let me lie in that.

"Yes but I do not think it was intention-."

"Not intentional my ass. Who was it?" His voice was harsh as he cut me off and after a few moments I shrugged. I wouldn't say, I wouldn't tell him. "Look at me, Mary Mary." His voice was a touch softer and I slowly looked up, his face went black with anger as he took in the state I was in. He stood up abruptly. I lowered my gaze from his face to his chest, hating how the tears wanted to escape. I didn't want to lie to him. I wanted to tell him everything. I wanted to tell him about the rejection, about how empty I felt but I bit my tongue. I watched as he moved around the desk to stand in front of me. A large hand reached up with a handkerchief and wiped at the sticky residue from my tears. His other hand grasped my chin as he bent down to look me in the eyes.

"Who was it?" His brown eyes were soft, despite the harsh lines of his face. He was an intimidating figure and I could understand why many in the pack feared him. I knew I should have, I knew it deep down but I couldn't. Something in the memories that had been nearly washed away kept me from fearing him.

"I can't say." I felt my bottom lip tremble at his gaze held me captive. He wanted answers that I couldn't give him. I wanted to badly to tell him but I couldn't. I had been ordered and an Omega needed to do as they were told.

"Mary Mary." There was a warning tone in his voice and I felt the trembling from my lip take hold of my entire body. Tears filled my eyes and I shook my head frantically.

"I don't know names, I don't know who. I just want to change sections." I felt my breathing come in quicker gasps and without warning I was pulled to a wide chest and comforting arms held me gently. Tears streamed from my eyes and I was too surprised to speak.

"Easy now, little one. I'll change you to section four." His voice was soothing as I shook like a leaf. His embrace was comforting but it did nothing to chase away the empty feeling in my chest.

I blinked rapidly trying to make the tears leave but it wasn't working. "That is your section." I said it slowly. He had always kept me the furthest from his section. He didn't want anyone thinking he was showing me favoritism. It was odd he would give me that section out of all of the other ones.

"I want to be able to keep an eye on you so this type of thing will not happen again. You are a member of this pack, you are special and you deserve to be treated fairly. You are not a play thing to the others." He said it carefully and slowly as he tightened his grip on me, holding me just a fraction closer. I nodded, burying my face into his chest. I didn't like how empty I felt, how exhausted I felt. I just wanted to curl up and sleep.

He let me go but grasped my shoulders gently, looking me in the eye before wiping away at my new tears with his handkerchief. "You look ready to collapse. Lie down on the couch and get some sleep. I'll let Ingrid know that you are not feeling well. No one has to know about why you are in here. I want you to feel better." Much to my shock he bent down and pressed his lips to my forehead in a fatherly kiss. Something he hadn't done since I was just a young girl. His stubble scratched my skin and for a brief moment I was six years old and he was kissing my forehead after he had bandaged my scrapped knee. He pulled back and patted my head before gently pushing me towards the sofa sitting in front of the fire place.

I made my way over to it on unsteady legs before sitting down. Without saying a word I shifted on the firm cushion, pulling my legs to my chest I lay curled up. I felt small and insignificant as I pulled my bare feet under my dress. I hadn't expected my mate to accept me. I hadn't expected a happy ending. I was just happy to be alive and to have a place to stay. I was content with the work I had but I didn't know how to deal with the burden of such a sharp rejection. I did not blame him for rejecting me. I knew he needed a more suitable mate than an Omega. He needed a mate that matched his station I just wished we had never been paired in the first place because the pain and then the empty hole I felt in my chest was almost unbearable. I felt cold and listless, like I would never be happy or warm again.

I closed my eyes and wrapped my arms tighter around myself. I wanted to sleep, everything in me wanted me to fall backwards into unconsciousness but the empty feeling was a heavy burden. The fire had been incredibly painful but the emptiness was a different sort of pain. It was like an unending ache deep within me that wasn't enough to take my breath away but enough to make it hard to think at times. I took in several deep breaths to push away the pain and I succeeded a tiny fraction. I hated feeling out of control. There was little I could control in my life and controlling my body had been the biggest things I had and now it was gone.

The door opened and Beta John's scent appeared in the room. I could hear him muttering under his breath and I tried to block the sounds out. I didn't wish to eavesdrop on them. It was not my business what Alpha Lawrence discussed with Beta John.

"Well, what was it she wanted?" He sounded irritated and I made note to avoid him in the present future. I knew when pack members were irritated by me it usually ended up in a stinging cheek or a harsh shove to the floor. I did not know what he would do but I did not want to find out. I squeezed my eyes together tightly, trying to block out the conversation but with the harsh silence in the room, it was like I was focused completely on their conversation.

"She was attacked in her section by some members she did not know. Remind me later to let the pack know that Omegas are not toys to be abused. They are people and part of this pack and do not deserve that sort of treatment." Alpha Lawrence's voice was low with warning. He was a good Alpha, I knew this and many others knew this. He was strict but he treated everyone the same, even the Omegas. I knew there were many packs that allowed their Omegas to be mistreated and abused harshly and I was glad he did not abide by such a thing.

"They are Omegas." There was an edge of distaste to Beta John's voice. No one truly liked Omegas, I heard in faint whisperings that there were some Alphas did not have Omegas and those that did have them, the Omegas weren't like us. They were merely timid creatures that the packs loved and cared for, protecting them intensely. I wondered if it were a lie to make Omegas feel better about their station in life, to give us hope that there was something better.

"Did I stutter, Beta? Omegas may be in that station in life but they are still members of this pack and I treat all members fairly. You are no better than an Omega in my eyes and they are no better than you." His voice had finality to it. He would speak of the subject no more. He had used that tone on me many times as I asked numerous questions about my life and about the world around me. I respected the tone. I could hear someone inhaling loudly and I felt my heart thump hard against my rib cage.

"She is still here." There was a low growl in Beta John's voice that I shivered at. The growl did not mean good things for me. I tightened my grip around my legs, closing my eyes tighter. I didn't want him to come closer. I didn't want to be caught listening.

"She is sleeping as she was not feeling well after the incident. I am having Ingrid change her quarters and I will not force her to continue cleaning her section after today." The warning one was back but his voice had an icy edge to it. He was losing patience with Beta John, it wasn't something I ever got to witness and I felt bad for listening to it.

"Omegas do not get time for-"