"Open your mouth. Show me your greedy tongue", says Alec in a hoarse voice. His right hand wraps around the stiff penis and the other is on top of my head with my fingers buried in my hair. I open my mouth, slide my tongue over my lower lip and Alec lets his hard cock slide deep into my throat. I don't move because I know Alec loves to rub his penis over my wet tongue. His deep gasping when the plump tip hits my throat gets my blood pumping. It flows hot and fast through my veins and collects in my loins. I concentrate on my breathing and the feeling of Alec's cock that slides incessantly over my tongue and becomes more and more plump.

I slowly rub my penis and, fascinated, watch Alec how his facial expressions change. The previously relaxed facial features turn into excitement. He no longer manages to suppress. My lips surround his cock and Alec moans loudly while his hand in my hair sets the pace of our movements. The salty tart aroma of his drops of pleasure pearls on my tongue and ensures that a wave of adrenaline wafts through my body. I look up at him from below. Alec looks deep into my eyes and the blaze of his greed and the urge for redemption is clearly visible. The sight of this and the fact that he is fucking my mouth excites me a lot. The movements around my penis are getting faster and faster. More and more greedy my tongue caressing his cock.

"Magnus", Alec groans throatily. A deep bass and the restless licking of his pink tongue over his beautiful lips. My climax overwhelms me very quickly. The pulling in my loins and the pleasant warmth turns into hot orgasmic waves. My whole body is shaking, I feel like I'm losing my feet. Alec comes groaning loudly in the depths of my throat as I try to get enough air to process my own orgasm. My lips tightly enclose his twitching penis.

The firm grip in my hair loosens and my tongue slowly glides over the hot, pulsating flesh. I taste Alec and the result of our lust. Alec looks at me, breathing hard, his eyes still gleaming with ecstasy. His hand wanders from my hair to my face and fidgety he caresses my cheek. I close my eyes for a moment and enjoy its warmth on my heated skin. I also suck up the last waves of his climax and the last drop of semen and distribute breathy kisses on Alec's sagging penis. Alec grabs my upper arms and helps me get up.

His gentle kisses after a blowjob are just as dear to me as the tender caressing of my trembling chest after he has catapulted me into another level with deep thrusts. Soft lips and a caressing tongue. A declaration of his affection. Every time he shows me that I am valuable and that it is important to him that I am fine. And this knowledge burdens me more and more. Because Alec shows me more and more clearly that he wants so much more. Still, I can't get enough of him.

"Go take a shower", he says. "I'll make you something to eat." I nod and steal one last kiss before I hurry up the stairs and into the bathroom. The step no longer creaks and for a moment I pause at this fact. Before I can think about it any further, my attention is on Alec and what he's calling after me.

"Please put on a warm sweater." I'm confused.

"Why?", I ask anxiously and swing around on the stairs. Something about the grin on his face tells me that Alec had planned out tonight.

"Surprise", he replies and walks towards the kitchen with a twinkling eye.

"I don't like surprises." I call after him and roll my eyes in annoyance. I don't get an answer and so I go to the bathroom to take a shower, a little frustrated.

There's a small bookstore in our neighborhood, just two blocks from my house. 'Every thing has its time' is emblazoned in white letters on the green-painted, wood-paneled facade. The generous shop window is decorated for Christmas and a chain of lights frames the glass of the large pane. With its warm white light emitting diodes, it gives off a wonderful light which should convey warmth, love and security. Little snowmen with warm bobble hats and orange carrot noses cavort on a carpet made of artificial snow and blend harmoniously into the lovingly decorated book landscape. I know this bookstore very well. And also their owner. James and Tessa Carstairs are an aging, lovable couple with a passion for the printed word. It was a little longer since my last visit, so I have a bad conscience right now. Until a few months ago I was a regular guest and a well-paying customer. The reason I haven't been here for a while is standing next to me and holding my hand. A fat, satisfied grin adorns his face. Alec beams as if he has caught the moon.

"Tonight there is a reading night. I have known the bookstore for a while. My uncle has already chased away one or two woodworms and given the aging shelves a new shine. During my training we were often here. I came after that too regularly looking for an exciting book about Jem and Tessa. I love shops like this. That unmistakable smell ... "

"After paper and ink", I finish Alec's sentence and get a nod of agreement.

"One of my favorite authors is here tonight. At the end there is still a question and book signing session", Alec says happily. I can clearly hear his excitement. I smile gently and kiss his lips, cool from the December air. "Then let's go in and get a good seat", I say and drag Alec away from the shop window and the happy snowmen towards the door. The brass-adorned doorbell rings brightly and greets every visitor with its friendly sound. So did Alec and me. And immediately the well-known smell of paper and ink welcomes us, a pinch of pine needles mixed with the Christmas aroma of cinnamon and warmth as well as the feeling of being at home.

"Hello Magnus. Hello Alec." James greets us beaming with joy. Like every day, he stands behind the large dark wooden counter that feels several hundred years old. Just like the floor-to-ceiling shelves crammed with books of all genres, from the new and the old. "Hello James. Nice to see you", I answer with a smile and see the man I have known for so many years around the counter and approaching us. I am speechless and petrified I stand still. How long have I not been here?

"What happened?", I ask tonelessly and immediately feel Alec's worried look on me.

"Oh that. Don't worry, Magnus. I've got a new hip. The stick helps me walk better. And it's a very fashionable accessory." James answers my question as casually as if he had told me that it has finally started to snow.

"Alec." Suddenly a loud and excited voice sounds. I don't have to look to know it's Tessa. It has hardly changed. Maybe one more strand of gray and the glasses are new. But otherwise it's still the same. Her hazel hair, with fine gray strands running through it, is shaped into a bun like every day and her friendly face is accompanied by a loving smile. She pulls Alec into a warm hug and strokes his hair caringly. The same attention is paid to me and I am just noticing how much I missed my trips to the little bookstore. Alec still holds my hand and I hold his. It has become quite normal for us to walk the streets of New York in this intimate and familiar gesture. Tessa's look at our clasped hands and the fine smile do not escape me. James also gives us a careful look. Alec releases his grip and puts an arm around my waist. With that he comes even closer to me and the security of this gesture lets the knowledge grow on the faces of our hosts.

"HE is your man?", asks James, and right now I feel easily betrayed. Did Alec talk about us? With my bookseller? I look skeptically into Alec's face and the book called Mimik opens wide and presents me with the ruthless truth. Yes. He talked about me. With my bookseller. The muscles in my body immediately tighten and my teeth grind tremendously as I take a breath and swallow my frustration over it. Alec tightens his grip on my waist and prevents me from simply leaving the store. Best of all still furious and with a billowing coat, slamming doors so that the pane of the window trembles tremendously, if not even shatters into a thousand small pieces.

"Yes", replies Alec and with that everything is said. They both nod, James mumbles.

"Very nice", and Tessa just claps her hands. "I wish you a nice night of reading. Two seats have been reserved for you in the first row. Have fun", she says beaming with joy and before I can say thank you, Alec has already set his long legs in motion and is pulling me behind him again. Yes, that's clearly our thing. Like so many other things. I smile at this fact. We're already a bizarre couple.

In the back of the bookstore, hidden behind shelves and lots of books, there is a small table and in front of it about twenty upholstered chairs with a few tables. All but two are already occupied and Alec takes a seat in one of them as a matter of course. I look around and discover the loving Christmas decoration, which exudes its own magic in this rather dark and often desolate time. Artfully designed garlands made of fir branches spread their aromatic fragrance. Big red balls and small golden ones. Candy canes complete the picture and fairy lights with small stars stretch a net around us and exude a cozy warmth. It smells of pastries, vanilla and cinnamon. Tessa greets each guest with a plate fully packed with cinnamon stars covered with a thick layer of icing and Christmas cookies in the shape of an elk. The thick red nose decorated with a marshmallow and the happy smile of Rudolph the reindeer made of white sugar script. A glass of punch, spicy and hot, rounds off the relaxed atmosphere. James and Tessa go to great lengths to ensure that their guests feel comfortable and have a great evening.

"Oh", Alec suddenly says next to me and I look at him confused.

"I was not expecting that." I have no idea what he's talking about.

"What's happening?", I ask carefully.

"I thought Kora Walker was a pseudonym and the author a man", he replies, still looking straight ahead and at the table on which there are several editions of today's book. I too now look at the table and see a small, slim blonde woman with a friendly smile. She fixes Alec with her eyes and seems to be very happy about something. Because her smile gets even wider and only when Tessa also hands her a cup of punch does she take her eyes off Alec.

"Is that important to you?", I ask and get a shrug.

"She writes about men. Two men who love each other. They have fucking hot sex. I really believed you were a him. It just surprises me. But it's okay", replies Alec. "It is not the author that is decisive. It is the content of the book. When I read a book, the author is irrelevant to me. I ignore that. A young author with his first work can be just as enchanting as a bestselling author with 23 novels on the shelves . It is important that the story is good. That the protagonists in my imagination come to life and I can smell the scent of roses and feel the pain of the man who is losing the love of his life to a woman. "

"You are my sun my moon and all my stars", replies Alec.

"Exactly", I whisper and my heart fills with warmth as he takes my hand and squeezes it tight.

"I believed until the end there was no happy ending. That would have been so sad."

"There is always a happy ending. Somehow. When a door closes, a new one opens. And now be quiet. It starts." The rustling of paper and the gentle melodic voice of the author accompany us through the night. We sit on our chairs with tension, eat pastries and drink punch. Let us be carried away into a world beyond morality. A world full of suffering and agony, love and loyalty, family, loyalty and betrayal.