Rasha

After I hang up with Nadia I look at my friends with no emotion. They look all back, I don't know what they were thinking. But I know they must be surprised. I look down at my phone and I see tears dropping on my phone. My tears. I don't know how to describe this feeling, I'm just destroyed. 

I always try to trust him but in the end, he breaks that trust. Why can't he be honest with me for once. I feel arms hugging me and a face rest on my head, ''Rasha, you don't deserve this.'' I hear Tamara say. I look up and I see her giving me a sad smile. Then I hear Medina get up from her chair. ''You're going to break up with him, now! He can't be doing this! He can't act like a child all the time!''

''Medina is right, if he loves you that why isn't he showing it.'' Their words destroy me. What they are saying is all true. But It's not that easy, I just can't break up with him like. What if he had a reason for all of this? No! Stop defending him. He clearly could've just been honest with you, but now he's only playing a game with my feelings. And he's clearly winning. 

I cried harder, I can't believe I forgot my own God for him. I had my first kiss with a man I wasn't married to, a man I kept having a relationship with. A man I still love. I forgot everything about Islam, Allah will never forgive me. Never.

''Girls, stop. Let her be. Let her think this all out. We shouldn't be so quick.'' Tamara defends the situation. I see Medina slapping her arm on the table. ''Are you fucking serious! He's clearly cheating on her!''

''C-ch-eating?'' I sniff. ''Yes, lying means cheating. Plus, he is lying to defend a woman. And not just any woman, a woman he dated before!'' Medina makes the whole situation worse, but It's all true. Saiid is cheating on me. ''I want you to break up with him today.''

Saiid

I walk into the kitchen as my eyes lay on Nadia, Mac, and Jaffar. ''Sup'' I nod at them before I take a seat. I feel them all staring at me, then I hear Mac clear his throat. ''So, how is it going between you and Rasha?'' Mac suddenly asks. I look up at them with my brows furrowed. ''It's all going good. Why are you asking.'' 

''Oh, It's nothing. It's just we haven't seen her for a while. When are you bringing her to our place?'' He asks again. I smile at them, ''Whenever she is free. I will bring her home tomorrow after school.'' I reply. They all nod slowly, why does it feel they are hiding something? Like they know something but they won't tell me. As I was trying to ask them what was wrong I hear my phone. 

I look at my phone and It's Maria calling me. I sigh loudly, can't she leave me alone for once. Doesn't she understand that I'm already in love with someone else? I get up and walk into my room before I answer the call. 

''Saiid! Please, meet me tonight. I have something to tell you!'' She shouts through the phone. What is wrong with this woman?

''Maria, please. I can't. I have woman, I can't keep me-'' She cuts me off.

''If you don't come, then you will see my dead body in the newspaper tomorrow.'' It felt like a slap on my mouth. She is thinking about killing herself... I sit on my bed and itch my beard, what is this woman doing? She really must be stupid.

''Fine, I'll meet you at 7 pm.''

Rasha

We ordered some pizza and we were watching a movie about teenagers falling in love. The most boring movie I must say. I didn't even watch it, all I could think about was Saiid. Is he really cheating on me? Or does he have a reason for all of this? I told Nadia everything about the situation and she told me that she never heard of Maria. So I guess there's more to the story. 

A second later I hear my phone buzz, I look at my phone and I see that Saiid is calling. I get up from the couch and the girls do the same. ''Pause! Pause! Pause the movie!'' They all exclaim. I hear my heartbeat real fast. ''Rasha, answer!'' Donia answer the call for me. I put the speaker on before gets to say anything.

''Hello?'' I answered. I hear him laugh through the phone, god that laugh makes my heart melt.

''Why do you sound so surprised?'' He continues to laugh. A smile automatically appears on my face. 

''No reason.'' I chuckle a bit. I see the girls frown at me.

''I miss you baby. I really miss you.'' I hear him whisper. I laugh as I feel tears dropping down from my eyes. I can't, I can't break up with him.

''Saiid, we met today. And we are going to meet tomorrow too.'' 

''I know baby, I can't wait until then'' He says and we both laugh. We exchange a few words before Medina tells me to hang up. After I hang up they all stare at me. I don't know if it's disappointment or something else. ''It's really sad.'' Donia let out. I look at her in confusion. 

''I really saw you two having a future. You acted so well together.'' I shake my head and get up from the couch. ''Can we please do something fun, I can't keep sitting here. I keep thinking about everything, please I need something to distract my mind from everything.'' I tell them. 

''Let's go to a park or something, let's forget the negative things and go have fun.'' Donia suggested. We all look at her smile, ''That's smart.''

Saiid

I see Maria looking at me a meter away, I sigh loudly and walk faster towards her. ''Saiid.'' She says softly. I don't say anything, I just look at her. Then I shook my head, ''Why did you want to meet up here?'' I look around, It's a park that I and Maria used to spend our time together. I didn't like this place, not after what happened. 

She chuckles, ''Don't act like you forgot this place. We used to spend our time here.'' She smiles at me. ''Maria, when will you understand. I have a girl I love. There won't be anything between us anymore. I moved on with a woman I want to spend my life with.'' I say. I don't know how many times I've told her this but I know I've heard those words more than my own name. 

She looks at me then she looks down. ''I wish I never left you like that. I wish I had realized your worth. Saiid, you were wonderful to be with. I loved everything you did for me. You treated me like a queen. But I don't know what made me choose Connor. I wish I was smarter. Please, Saiid. Come back to me.'' She begs me. I look at her like she's out of her mind.

Didn't she understand what I just said. ''Please Saiid, you don't need Rasha. I know what you're trying to do. Rasha is just a replacement for me. But baby, I'm back. Please break up with her. Please, she is not worthy.'' What she said made my blood boil. Is she clear? What does she know about Rasha? What does she know about our relationship?

''I tried killing myself when I realized that I left a man who treated me like I was enough. I want you back. Please, Saiid.'' She unexpectedly hugs me. 

Rasha

We walk around a park that I've never been to, Tamara told us about this park and this park is called ''The Loving Park''. I laughed loudly when she told us about it, It's probably something Malik made up. As we walk around the park we talk about some childhood memories that we went through and some fun things we saw people do. Wallah, I've really missed us, when it was only us and no men in our life. I love spending time with them, but the last few weeks my focus has only been on Saiid.

''So Rasha, are you going to confront Mr.Bashar.'' I hear Medina ask. I sigh before I answer, ''I guess I'm going to do that, I can't keep acting like everything is fine.'' They all hug me, ''You deserve better. Plus they are a lot of men out there, you will find someone better.'' Donia kisses my cheek. I feel my heartbreak into pieces. I don't want anyone else but Saiid. Why is he doing this. Why is he breaking my heart?

''Oh my god, look It's a couple that's hugging.'' Tamara points at two people hugging. If it really ends between me and Saiid, I'm going to miss our hugs. As we walk closer towards I feel like I know them, I don't know but they look really familiar. Then it hits me, ''Saiid...'' I let out.

My friends look at me then look at them again, I see Medina running towards, ''Mr.Bashar'' I hear her yell. I see both Maria and Saiid flinching. They look at us confused, then Saiid's eyes lays on me. His chin drops like he wasn't expecting all of this. ''How could you fucking do this to her! How could you fucking do this!'' I hear Medina shout again.

I see Saiid walking towards me, I hear him calling my name a few times. All I could see was blurry, my tears covered everything. ''Baby, babe I can explain. It's not what it looks like.'' It's like he couldn't catch his breath. ''Saiid, what is this.''

''Rasha, I can explain. Maria and I, yes fine we used to da-'' I cut him off, ''I know everything Saiid. I know everything. I know that you used to date and that Adnan wasn't the one who called you last time. In fact, Adnan Isn't in California. I know it was all a lie.'' I spat everything out. 

He looked at me shocked like he couldn't believe me. ''Were you ever going to tell me?'' The tears won't stop, they keep running down. ''Answer me! Answer me!'' I began to punch his chest, hard. He tried to stop me but then I kicked his leg. ''Rasha, please calm down.'' He whispers to calm me down. But I'm still frustrated. 

''What I did do to deserve this, Saiid? You promised me, you promised me that you wouldn't hurt me. But why is my heart hurting? It hurts so bad.'' I sob loudly. He tries to hug me, but I push him. ''Don't touch me, don't fucking touch me! Do you fucking understand!?'' I keep screaming. Then he finally lets go of me. He just looks at me, with no emotions, nothing to say.

''How did this happen, Saiid? Why did this happen, why couldn't you just tell the truth?'' I see him chewing on this bottom lip, he was clearly nervous. I shake my head and wipe my tears away. ''You know what, just fuck this. Let's end this bullshit.'' He holds my hand, ''Rasha please, I was going to tell you bu-'' 

''Let go of her. She doesn't need you anymore. You're not good for her, she deserves better.'' Donia said. He looks at my friends then at me. 

''She's right, I deserve better Saiid..'' I said before we all left him with that whore.

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