True P.O.V

I had seen all my family members come and visit me, well everyone except dad, but I wasn't expecting for him to come here, into a hospital. He wouldn't even want to see me anyway, I mean this is the guy who'd beat me in the basement without anybody knowing, but it's not like they'd care enough to look down in the basement, they had no reason to go down into the basement either.

I didn't want dad to show up here either. He wouldn't, this was a high-security hospital it had too many cops for dad to even think about showing up here. I was slowly getting bored of the hospital though, I was going to be stuck in here for about another couple days and then I knew I'd have to take it easy but I wasn't too concerned about that.

I disliked this hospital, I swear to god the nurses hated me, and I couldn't even remember what I did to them to make them dislike me. After me and Chris very heated chat, he stared at me in shock for a while before he walked out saying he'd bring my stuff in here. In about two hours he brought a small backpack in, and I knew he hadn't gone through it because I knew for a fact that I had my gun in there so I knew there weren't any metal scanners for weapons, so it wasn't as good of a hospital.

I had a hanging tv in the right corner that was lowly playing Family Guy on TBS and I was paying little to no attention to it as I glanced back down at my now charged phone, seeing a set of texts from three separate people, Kyle, Claire, and the one that made me the most anxious, Alister.

I didn't really want to read the texts but deep down I knew I had to, there was no way I could ignore the texts, or block the numbers especially since they were only being concerned friends, and well who knew what Alister was to me. I know he wasn't a friend and I didn't consider him to be Kyle's caregiver even though he shared the title with Karin, which I'm guessing is where Kyle is now.

I tempted on who I would text back first and picked Claire as she hardly ever texted me, so I knew her text was focused solely on my attempted suicide.

I clicked on her name and her message board and read the texts she had sent me.

💤

I sigh as I look at the three texts she had sent me and the timing went from a couple minutes on the first two and then four hours later. She was simply concerned and scared for me. I knew that's all it was, but that's fine.

🛡🏹🏹

I sighed as I closed Claire's message board knowing she wouldn't get it since she should be in class. Which is why I decided to wait n texting Kyle since he should be in school, but I wasn't sure if he was, he liked to skip when things became stressful or something life-changing happened. Which practically explained my situation to a full.

I choose that moment to open Alister's message box. I was generally curious on to why Alister texted me about, more so on why but I guess that was kind of why I opened his message page.

🕵

I knew the question wasn't one to ignore. Somewhere inside of me told me that I couldn't ignore it, that I had to answer the text. I didn't really understand the feeling, but it felt natural, and that's what concerned me, would I start to feel like this all the time?

I took a deep breath that made my chest rise a little faster than normal. Was I panicking about sending a text? What has this world come to?

I took one look at the messaging platform before I answered the text.

🛡🏹🏹

I close the text platform. Before I lean back and crash my head onto the pillow before shutting down my phone before I could get a response because I didn't want to talk to anybody right now. I fling my phone across the room and scream into my hands as a wave of anger went through me. I seriously didn't feel like this was even the answer. I should be dead. I shouldn't be inside this hospital but for whatever reason I am and I think that it's killing me inside to be alive if that makes any sense.

I looked at where the phone had landed and saw that there was a crack in the screen but it was still looking usable. I didn't get up to get it, as I still had the nose IV in but it was getting removed this afternoon, thank god.

I looked around the room again, still not liking what I saw. I hated hospitals but that may have grown off the fact I had only been in one with the fingers on my right hand. It might be the reason but then again, it might have nothing to do with it but that's why I think I hate hospitals.

It might also be because this hospital seems to mock me, mock me about how I failed so miserably at killing myself. If I had succeeded then I would be six-feet under instead of being stuck in this damn hospital room.

I turned my attention to the wall in front of me, finding myself lost in staring at it. It was a nice color, but it was just a wall.

I was just a human.

This is just life.

And I was tired of being a pawn in this game, especially if the other pawns wouldn't play fair.

I want to quit.