Sometimes we make an actions without thinking the consequences but it always depend us whether to treat it as a mistake or a lesson.

Two days had past I will going to go in the company once again since Dwight is out of the country for two days. I wore a simple black dress and let my hair fall I just put orange lipstick in my lips and wore accessories.

As I arrive in the office I engrossed myself in the papers as soon as I finish I stretch out my body. An idea pop out of my mind I stand quickly and started to walk I decided to take a little stroll. As I walk around people are busy working they really focusing on what they doing.

I sit on the living room of the company it is so big that can accommodate a lot of people. There are also books and newspaper that is intended to entertain. I pick some of newspapers this is updated I scan a little to entertain myself, as I look at the other page the name of my husband caught my attention it is wrote in a big bold letters.

I read further and the fuck of this man there is photo of my husband and the elegant woman looking at each other. Some of the photos is in the hotel some have caption the mysterious timberner who owns a lot of business reveals his identity for the first time in one of his biggest product launching abroad. He also caught with a woman name Kim Salvador which turns out to be his ex.

The mysterious billionaire said to be a married man the questions remain in the mind of most people do the billionaire have a broken marriage? I take a deep breath I didn’t know what the truth behind all of this but he must at least respect our vows I look pathetic right now in the eyes of others but I don’t care anymore.

A day come once again I don’t go to office since there was an email that my husband will be going home this day. I wore my casual gym clothes and take a run while my body guards where following me yes they still guarding me until now whenever I go out of the house. As I finish my one hour run I go to the gym of the house and tried some work out. Lunch arrived when I finish taking a bath I wore my home clothes yaya minda came to my view as soon I go to the dining table. She really like a mother to me we eat and she even told me that Dwight go to the office the moment he arrived here in the Philippines.

I stretch my body as soon as I finish watching tv there was a knock on the door so I open it Dwight reveal at the view he enter the house and I rolled my eyes on him. I confront him that he must be careful not to be caught by the media the news is all over the world. But he just replied I am all out of it, what the fuck are you talking about Dwight I am your wife on papers and in those people who knew the issue I look like a fool well I don’t care anyways but be careful not being caught going in and out of the hotel. Gosh what a toxic as I was about to go away he hold my chin and grip it tightly telling me that I am no one to question him. That I am just a beggar that he give his home but I don’t have any rights to rule and to demand I didn’t notice that my tears fall I don’t know if it is because of the physical pain or the pain burning in my heart.

I tried my best to understand him but it is really easy for him to hurt me his not a real man but why can’t I hate him despite of everything.

He just laugh at me sarcastically and throw me at the floor woman if you don’t keep listening to me your counting your life in. I laugh while I’m still on the floor do you really think I will be scared of death no mr. never in my life I got scared of it.

I stand and slap him in his face mans are really mans you all can go to hell he pointed his gun across my head but then yaya minda shout out of her lungs he run and shield her body that was the time Dwight comeback to his senses he lower his gun and go upstairs while yaya minda hugging me and asking me if I’m ok.

One day had past I never see Dwight ever since that night I spend my day locking myself in my room. I just feel so tired I cant understand myself anymore the pain is always building in my chest. I keep on controlling my tears my life messed up big time.

The ringing of my phone disturbing my thought I answer the call and it turns out that the one who’s calling is my best friend she keeps on pursuing me to go out I keep on making excuses but knowing her she will going to find my house just to see me so I agree to see her since I need a break for everything. After this night I will be going to be alive again. I put a little make up and let my hair fall with its natural curly hair I also wear a black shining dress above the knee with its little deep v cut in front and its back have a design of X. I also wear a white sandal with a white pouch.

The two bulky man Dwight and itachi follow me again and they don’t even give freedom as soon as me and my friend arrived at the bar we try our best to lost this two. They were the two who always on my side since Dwight trusted them so much and they also his friend . Thanks god we succeed scaping from them and I feel free right now me and my friend have fun drinking and dancing I’ve been getting tipsy but I don’t really care anymore I wonder how life can be playful it really hits me too hard.

My phone ring and I answer it even the number is unknown for me. I go out of the bar a little to be able to heard the one who’s calling I’ve been speaking hello for almost three times. As I was about to end the call the other person finally speak long time nosy he said and laugh out of his lungs. You grow old to be a fine and beautiful woman you really look like your mother. I already give you enough time to enjoy your life honey and my waiting is enough for you to grow up. I feel like a dozen of cold water where thrown on me anger, pain sorrow, lost and vain enveloped me. I know this voice too well a voice that sent me nightmare along time ago.

I didn’t notice how long I’ve been standing while looking at my phone and I didn’t even notice that my tears slowly falling in my eyes I feel so numb I want to break everything that I can see.

I want to freed myself from all of the darkness that living in me right now. A feminine voice awaken me from my thoughts as she look at me tears quickly fall from her eyes. I don’t like to see that expression in your face right now its your mothers death anniversary this day right. You can talk to me I will always be here she said sincerely.

I hug her freeing all the negative feelings I’ve been feeling right now. From the moment my father left my mom ever since I am at her womb. Ever since some psycho fall and got in love to my mom but my mom always denied him and it ended up raping my mom and killing her mercilessly.

Even though it is all in the past and I tried to forget all of this deeper in my heart I cant help to forget it all it pained me a lot. Nightmares don’t let me sleep sometimes I will always blame myself for the loss for being present for seeing everything but do nothing for being weak for being alive while my mom died I deserve to be dead that day. Kate really needs her but she’s gone because I can’t even protect her.

I wish I didn’t follow what my mom wants me to do she keeps on shouting run my love run, and every night I can hear the same voice the pleading she tell to let me free despite all of her agony her pains. She’s a loving mother she always sacrifice everything for her daughters even in her remaining time she thinks of me. But then I run for my life but never even tried to help my mom to save my mom I’m a worst daughter ever.

This is what I’ve got now married to the man who doesn’t even care about me who hates me to the core.

His a demon he kill my mom mercilessly he don’t even tried to listen to her pleading to her cries instead he laugh like a psycho. The day that I sent him in jail instead of apologizing he laugh at me and tell me to grow old looking young and pretty. He will see me sooner I’ve been scared for almost years thinking that he might harm us again I train myself for years and right now I will do everything to protect my sister from any danger. I need to be strong and tough for my mom and for my sister.

I cried on her shoulder she also cried comforting me she knows everything all of the pain all of the difficulties I’ve been through. Ever since that day I never cried but right now I can’t control the tears anymore. Maybe because of the alcohol in my body that’s why every pains I been hiding shattered off now. My heart been so tired along time ago but kate needs me.

This day I will throw all of the worst thing that happen in my life. I will care no more, but this time I realize that drink really brings back all of the memories. But I hope all of this alcohol that I am drinking will make me sleep and forget all of the nightmares I've been through.

The moment I open my eyes my head ache is getting worst I look at my surroundings this is really unfamiliar it over view the city the window is really big it is made of glass the design of the room show higher class. Everything looks minimal simple yet beautiful it looks really expensive. My head still banging this hang over really feels bad as I was about to stand the blanket low down a little just then I realize I was naked. I started to panic controlling my breath since I feel like crying I know something happens I can sense and feel it on my own body.

Just then memories slowly flooding my mind I can’t remember everything clearly but I still can recall I’ve been drinking nonstop. I also see my husband Dwight his also drinking he looks at me the looks in his eyes shows anger. The next thing happen I ended up ordering hard drinks. And then I can also recall that arrgggg I thought its just a dream how come that it is all true what the f*uck I loose myself in this instant I take care of it for a long years and in just one night I loose it all.

I slowly look at my left side my breath got caught in my throat there is a man lying in there sleeping peacefully. I cried silently cursing myself I take care of myself for years and in just one night its gone. I make a promise to myself that I only give my soul to the man who love me. But then I gave myself to a man who will never be mine I have his name but I know the risk will always be undecided.

Mans will always be a man some of them will throw you when they finally got what they wanted. I hope Dwight will not going to do the same my life is hopeless while my tears falls carelessly. I look for my clothes hoping I will see it I almost want to bang my head when I see it at the floor in front of the him. As I was about to stand silently reality slap me the blanket is only one and he uses the other half.

Gosh how unlucky I am as I look at the clock its already 3 am I need to escape from this as fast as I can. The pain in my head and the soreness I feel wasn’t set me at ease. I feel a sudden movement and I pretend to be asleep praying silently that the man where still sleeping. Minutes had past and I slowly open my eyes the view in front of me almost give me a heart attack the man was Dwight that makes my world shattered what I’ve done.

The sun rays hit my face awakens me from my sleep I curse myself for falling asleep as I look around Dwight wasn’t there anymore. My body is too heavy like my head the sore feel so bad I tried my best to make my way into the bathroom. I engrossed myself with warm water the smell of the flowers feel so refreshing. I didn’t notice that I fell asleep once more. I feel a little better as I got home the house is so silent I enter my room and lock myself in it I even don’t bother to let any one enter bringing food. I feel like losing my sanity I can’t even feel like eating all I do the whole day is take a rest sleep and drink water.

I barely eat but most of the times I skip eating thinking all of the possibilities. I wear a casual clothes a black dress with roses design on it and a black heals and white bag my husband has been away for 2 days I been doing his papers everyone that closest to me Dwight and itachi even yaya minda always ask me if I was alright they said I look lifeless and pale. I just always smile at them and laugh at them explaining that I am well and fine for them not to worry too much. Maybe it’s all because my mistakes are all eating me alive I’m not eating too well I engrossed myself with a lot of work and purposefully doing all of this including sleeping at late hours.